People Want To Fly Away From Their Problems In These 'Am I The Jerk?' Stories

"I (17M) live with my mom. My dad lives in another state and until last year I flew out and spent 6 weeks with him every summer. But last year I told Dad I was only going to visit for a week's vacation and come back home again. He was upset but he said he was fine with it, but he wanted me to spend some time with his partner and her son. When I got to Dad's house, his partner's son was in the hospital so I didn't meet them. Dad was upset and wanted me to stay but I wanted to get back home and get back to work. I went to visit for one weekend again this year. This year he married his partner... who's now his wife I guess. So he asked me to change the date I was planning to come. I visited the second week of June. But his stepson's birthday is in July and he wanted me to be here. I already had plans made for July and told Dad. Then his mother-in-law died the day before I was due to fly out so Dad had the choice of me canceling so he could be with his wife and her son or whether he would stay behind and I'd fly out. He decided to stay so he could see me. He was disappointed I still didn't meet his wife or her son, but especially her son, who turned 8 in July. My dad brought up his stepson's birthday to me after I flew back. I asked him why he kept talking about it and he said he'd love to fly me out for the day, so I could come to the party, meet his family, and get to know my sibling. I told my dad his stepson wasn't my sibling. We're still strangers. And we'll never be close. I told him I was not going to move closer to them when I finished school. I told him I was not going to invite them all to stay with me. We'll see each other occasionally but they won't be a big part of my life. I reminded him he chose to move and not be a big part of my life. Dad said he had his reasons and that I should embrace the chance to have a sibling. I said no thanks. He bought a plane ticket for me for the day of the birthday party. Sent it two days before. He told me to please come. I told him I wasn't coming. He even showed up at the airport with his stepson to wait for me. His wife joined them. I didn't come. Ever since Dad has been upset when we talk on the phone. He told me he couldn't understand me not making the effort. He said it would have meant the world to them. He also told me I had no real reason not to come, other than I don't want to make an effort for us to be a family and it makes him sad. He also said his stepson and wife had been so excited to meet me. AITJ?" Another User Comments: "He dragged his wife and 8yo stepson to the airport!?!? What’s wrong with him?!? He’s making you out to be the bad guy and dragging his family into his lies. Ugh. I’d reach out to his wife and apologize for your father misleading them. Tell her you had longstanding plans, you told your father this repeatedly, and he knew you didn’t get on the plane. Tell her you have no issues with her or your stepbrother, but your father is a manipulator and she shouldn’t fall for his lies." ConnectionRound3141 Another User Comments: "NTJ. You're 17 and Dad expects you to take time out of your life to meet his other family. If it's so important to him why doesn't he fly them all to meet you? Because it will inconvenience everyone else you're expected to make the concessions for him. Dad needs to grow up and recognize he has a son who is a near adult and can make his own decisions. He can't make up for being gone-dad by foisting other people onto you. I expect he thinks he can foster a bond if you have a relationship with his stepson. Instead, he's putting a giant wedge in it. Dumb dad" readout