People Ask For Insightful Feedback Regarding Their "Am I The Jerk" Stories

"My husband and I decided to take our kids on a cruise for spring break. When my cousin heard about it she and her husband decided to book the same one with their kids.

They kind of crashed our trip. We were very hesitant to go with them but we couldn’t exactly forbid them from going. My cousins and I are super close we grew up like sisters and I try very hard to stay close to them. The issue is her kids are VERY badly behaved. My kids can enjoy them in small doses as can we but trying to do more than a few hours at a time with them is difficult.

She has a 9 and 6-year-old and a toddler. They throw long and LOUD tantrums until they do get their way.

They also need 24/7 entertainment or they go crazy. If they’re bored for even a minute they start crying and complaining and my cousin and her husband have to stop what they’re doing and start entertaining them to stop the tantrum. This is 100% on the parents.

We’ve never done a trip together like this and weren’t sure how her kids could handle it. But we agreed to sit with them for dinner and do the same shows as them etc. If you have never been on a cruise they seat you at the same table every night with the same people.

Well, it proved to be a mistake after the first night. They were terrible at dinner. They drew on the walls with their crayons. Purposely crumbled bread to make a mess. They used their knives to cut up straw wrappers and other things. They also kept running around the table and distributing other tables. Their parents of course did nothing to stop this just let them do whatever.

Eventually, they got tired of that and started crying and screaming they were bored and wanted to go to the shops. They allowed them to throw a 5-minute screaming tantrum before their dad finally took them to the shops to buy some toys they wanted. Then after dinner, we went to a show and they didn’t enjoy the show and also whined loudly that they were bored. It was bad enough we were asked to leave the show.

Technically my husband and I could’ve stayed with our kids but we were too embarrassed.

My kids were upset and said they ruined the show for them. So my husband and I decided to ask for a different table for the rest of the trip and chose different activities to do.

I told my cousin that we decided it would be best to separate at dinner and not do all the activities together, but we could still hang out at the pool together and do a few activities together.

Well she was pretty upset and she said her kids got their feelings hurt that we abandoned them and that they weren’t going to enjoy their trip anymore being separated from their cousins.

She wouldn’t talk to us for the rest of the trip.

We’re back home and I got calls from my grandparents asking why we ditched her and how could we do that to them. My sister said we should’ve known that this was going to happen and set the expectation for separate things ahead of time instead of springing it on them during the cruise.

So AITJ?"

Another User Comments:

"They crashed your trip and then refused to parent their children and it was so bad they were asked to leave with no indication they would stop it in the future. That's on them... not you and your children deserve to enjoy their trip.

So did you and your husband for that matter. NTJ and this is why we used to be terrified my aunt and uncle would show up during one of our Disney trips (they used to suggest it.). Although in that case the husband is about as badly behaved as the children. I wish I was kidding." KimB-booksncats-11

Another User Comments:

"NTJ. Stop beating around the bush. There's already drama so you might as well just be honest. Your relationship isn't going to survive this anyway because her kids will just get worse with time. She's trying to force people into her chaos because everyone is avoiding her.

That's why she invited herself to your trip. Because she knew nobody would willingly go with her.

'My sister said we should’ve known that this was going to happen and set the expectation for separate things ahead of time instead of springing it on them during the cruise.' Oh, you mean like how the cousin did exactly this, but to the entire trip?

Ignore them. They're the reason things got this bad to start with. If they want to enable her, your sister and family can go with her themselves. But I'm sure they won't for the same reasons. Hypocrites." LongjumpingEmu6094