People Get Relentless In These 'Am I The Jerk' Stories

"I am a 19(m) year old college student, entering my sophomore year this fall. I have dealt with a lot of dumb people in high-school, and because of it my tolerance levels have dropped considerably. I’ve come to live by the idea that people don’t change easily, and if they snake you once, surely they’d do it again. With this in mind, in hopes of not making the story too long I’m going to focus on one friendship in particular. For confidentiality purposes, let's call him Steve. Steve and I met in the summer leading up to freshman year, and at the beginning we connected very easily. We hung out all the time and confided in each other with nearly everything, until the first of two main problems arose. One night I was on the dance floor of a bar, dancing with a girl having a good time. Steve’s ex from high school comes up to me and whispers in my ear “you’re too good for her”, and motions for me to step away. (Now keep in mind, I am well aware of who this is). I step away and we begin making casual conversation before my friends motion to me that we are leaving the bar. As I’m leaving I attempt to call Steve to tell him about the strange interaction, but he didn’t answer, and because it was late at night I assumed he was asleep. The next day, he calls me upset, accusing me of trying to get with his ex. Apparently she texted him and claimed that I came up to her in the bar and that Steve should be wary of me. This was complete nonsense, but he wasn’t hearing any of it, and instead remained mad at me. Knowing that I didn’t do anything wrong, I accepted this and went on about my life. Weeks later, he attempts to salvage our relationship, but at this point I have already distanced myself somewhat. Now for the second problem; me and Steve both skate, and because our dorm rooms are not very big, we usually left our boards right outside our doors. After coming back from the dining hall, I noticed my board was missing, so I texted Steve asking if he took it. Lo and behold, he did, saying that mine rides smoother and he wanted to get to his destination quicker. This annoyed me, as I couldn’t understand why he didn’t simply ask for my permission, and I told him this. He then blew up on me, saying not to make a big deal out of it and that I “didn’t ask for permission to talk to his ex”. This absolutely blew my mind, and at that point I was done with him. Fast forward to a couple days ago, he sends me a text saying that “you and me both made mistakes” and that he was interested in starting fresh. To me, I have no desire to maintain a relationship with him and I don’t trust him anymore to be a genuine friend; AITJ for wanting to tell him to get lost?" Another User Comments: "Don't tell him to get lost, but do tell him you've no interest in rekindling the friendship. You haven't been yelling at him or making leaps of illogic in your interactions, and your experience with him suggests that he will do all this again. NTJ, and I hope you've got your board back." tosser9212 Another User Comments: "NTJ. A friendship, like all relationships, is based on trust and respect. Steve is not your friend. He made false accusations against you, and borrowed your skateboard without asking. You need to cut him off completely and stop hanging around him. He sounds like he is very insecure and entitled." Popular_Document1399 Another User Comments: "NTJ for deciding who you want to be friends with but none of this is deal breaking stuff. You put yourself in a situation with your friend's ex that invited a misunderstanding. Leaving a girl you were dancing with to talk to his ex, and then not telling him about it afterwards is kind of shady. Even if it was 100% innocent on your end, you have to understand why he would have a hard time believing you. Secondly he borrowed you board without asking, inconsiderate yes. Snake move, no. Sometimes when you’ve been burned badly by people in the past, it skews how you view normal conflicts in relationships. If you want any of your friendships to last you have to learn how to navigate these situations and not have bailing on people as your go to move." the_harlinator