People Want Their Revenge In These 'Am I The Jerk?' Stories

"Last week, I (23F) received a message from an anonymous Instagram account claiming my partner (23M) of 5 months is a liar and a deceiver. This shocked me because I finally feel I can trust someone and work through my past traumas. I asked the account for proof but didn't get a reply right away. When they eventually responded, they only mentioned personal details about my partner, like his "anatomy curves to the left" and that he's "dominant in bed." This wasn't proof, so I requested actual evidence, but instead, they attacked me personally, calling me names like "ugly" and "insecure." I suspect this is his ex trying to stir drama. My partner has been reassuring throughout, even offering to let me look through his phone. I trust my instincts, and there's no solid evidence to suggest he's lying. Throughout this, I kept my best friend (23F) updated and specifically asked her not to contact his ex. However, she ignored my request and texted her anyway, saying, "I'm sorry, you're going to hate me, but I texted her." I was furious and told her she crossed a serious boundary, dragging someone into a situation they might not even be involved in. I told her that if my partner broke up with me over this, our friendship would be over. I know my reaction was wrong; I was angry and triggered by past experiences. My friend and I have had many arguments recently, including one during a trip to Paris that left me feeling panicked and frustrated. Interestingly, what the ex-partner said about their relationship mostly confirmed what my partner had told me. She expressed her insecurities and admitted she had no proof of any deception. I apologized to my friend, acknowledging my harsh words. She claimed she needed space now, and her sister and partner unfollowed me on Instagram. She deleted all our photos together and cut me out of her life. I feel like I might have ruined our friendship, even though I wasn't the one who crossed the boundary first. While I regret saying I'd end our friendship, I also feel betrayed by her actions. I understand she might have thought she was helping, but it wasn't her place to involve herself without my consent, especially when I was already dealing with a lot of stress. I'm left questioning whether my reaction was justified or if I'm to blame for how things unfolded." Another User Comments: "NTJ. Your friend crossed a major boundary by contacting his ex despite your clear request. It wasn't her place to interfere, especially when the situation was already emotionally charged for you. It's understandable to feel hurt, but take this as a lesson about trust and boundaries in friendships." EchoFable24 Another User Comments: "Your friend was a jerk. You didn't need to apologize. She's now turned herself into the victim and getting her sister on board with their petty actions. Hold your head high, you're in the right. Maybe she'll come back, maybe she won't, and you can decide if you care then." Fit_Try_2657 Another User Comments: "Your friend made the conscious decision to reach out to his ex knowing it wasn't what you wanted - she had to know you wouldn't react positively? I honestly think your reaction in the heat of the moment was pretty fair and you even apologized for how you spoke! NTJ" Nice_Ad1951