Does your wife hate her children? She desperately needs therapy. In the meantime, yes, document everything and get yourself and the girls into therapy. The only way to stop this kind of abusive, narcissistic behaviour is realizing (for the child, that is) that it's NOT THEIR FAULT. And mommy is being mean because she likes being mean. I'm honestly really sorry for those girls, they're being set up to fail by one of the two people who should ALWAYS have their backs.