Justobservant
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He can be disappointed but he has no right to be angry and punish you with a silent treatment or any other form of abuse. Work is work, and I don't care if he doesn't care about his own job and blew it off for you or your family/friends, that's his choice.
Your career is important to you, and work, to me, is usually a very valid reason to miss events like some couple you DON'T know getting married.
His reaction is a gigantic red flag. Please sit up and pay attention to what his actions are telling you.
Hope you nail the presentation!
Imamage fightme and jeni2 have it exactly right. You've been hoodwinked into thinking you married a loving, kind, man who isn't greedy or weak.
Your man is a walking RED FLAG. Everything you've described makes me cringe. Please get rid of him, this isn't a sustainable, supportive, loving, reasonable or mentally and emotionally healthy person never mind marriage, for you or anyone.
He needs to get himself some help, or get himself a weaker woman he can stomp on.
Let him know ASAP you won't be attending. You don't need to explain anything, just let him know that particular dinner won't be something you'll attend. If you two regularly reciprocate birthday gifts, then go get him something more suited to your budget. If it's entirely one sided and he's usually mooching expensive dinner and drinks for himself, then just don't attend and let that be the end of it.
You do NOT owe anyone any information or explanations about your finances. Ever. So please don't explain your budget or lifestyle.
Anyone can be an incredible tattoo artist and can still be unprofessional and immature. Seems like you found one of those, unfortunately. You're not the jerk and you need to get your deposit back. Whether or not they have or need that money is their problem, any professional would return it, sans whining or excuses. They also wouldn't involve the entire world in their woes in relation to their JOB. They made it personal which screams of immaturity.
Please find someone else to tattoo you!
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