People Spill Their Eye-Rolling Encounters With A Roomie
46. Environmentally-Friendly Roommate Is Overreacting
“I lived with a guy who thought he was Captain goddamned Planet.
I recycle, I limit water and electricity usage but this guy was downright intrusive in his mission to save the world.
The light to our shared bathroom was next to the door on the outside wall (1960s design brilliance). One evening after work I went for a shower, turned on the light on my way in, shut the door, got undressed and jumped in, started washing my hair, and then the room blacked out.
The idiot had switched off the light. I yelled out to him that I was showering and he yelled back that he knew but I didn’t need the light to be on.
He would also go through our bin at the end of every week to make sure I hadn’t thrown out anything that was potentially recyclable.
Between this behavior and the never-ending constant stream of houseguests, travel acquaintances, relatives, and a friend who believed that a one-week stay meant he could move his cat in, I had enough and refused to renew the lease with him.
I still recycle but only because I want to.”
45. She Thinks Someone Is Smashing The Dishes In Our House
“She spent the whole two years being openly annoyed and accused the rest of us for our kitchenware going ‘missing’, suggesting that one of us was smashing it accidentally and not having the guts to own up to it, or worse just throwing it away. She got really self-pitying and tried to guilt-trip us saying it was more her stuff than anyone else’s that had gone.
She was even known to drink out of a pan with a straw when we had gatherings because ‘there just aren’t any glasses!’
At the end of the second year, she went away and my housemates and I went up to her room to retrieve any dirty plates, etc we could find as we were having a spring clean. My other housemate was a bit suspicious and decided to have a snoop in her wardrobe, she lifted a bedsheet covering the bottom of her wardrobe…
and it was covered in mold and stale milk. There were around 20 knives and forks, as well as about 10 plates and bowls, and 6 glasses. Turns out she was just too lazy to wash up her stuff and so instead went on a psychotic tirade of trying to make the rest of us suspect each other!
She did many other strange things but this was the final straw in our friendship..”
44. He Threw My Toaster In The Garbage
“Freshman year of college, my roommate was a foreign exchange student from Holland. Before I begin, I want to preface that I did the normal college stuff (drinking, parties, etc.) but I was also a stickler for the rules during times that I needed to get stuff done in my own room.
Now, to start, my roommate loved to drink, and he had the great idea of saving all his beer cans and taping them together (without washing them out first) to make a chair.
Looking at it was kind of impressive until you smelled it. After 4 or 5 months, the smell of skunky/moldy beer became a permanent fixture in my tiny dorm room. He would play soccer, and then hang his sweaty socks from my fan to dry. He would regularly put eggs in my microwave just to watch them explode. He and his friend stole my toaster and threw it in the garbage (as a ‘prank’).
He put tiger balm (like icy hot, but worse) in my underwear. He also sprayed the fire extinguisher down our hallway at 2 a.m. during finals week and we couldn’t get back to our room until after 4 or 5. He was finally kicked out of the university for not showing up to classes for weeks on end. When he was asked to leave the dorms, he decided to see if he could sneak in another week before leaving. I only found out he was kicked out when my RA asked me how it was having a room to myself. I had no idea what he was talking about. Definitely the worst roommate I have ever had.”
43. He Said My Room And Lifestyle Were "Foul"
“My initial roommate and best friend had to move home because he lost his job, so a mutual friend decided to take his room.
This new roommate kept his room as bare as a prison cell; no posters, no knick-knacks, nothing except a few free weights, he said that a clean space helped clear his mind.
My room was admittedly messy, but I didn’t mind if there were clothes on my floor, I was paying for the room and would keep it in whatever condition I saw fit.
The living room, kitchen, bathroom, etc, were in decent condition, so I thought everything was Sympatico.
After a few weeks, the new roommate would question why I wasn’t exactly like him, by staring me down as I’d make a bacon sandwich and inform me that I’d die by clogging my arteries. He’d bring the weights into the living room to lift while I was watching TV, but it began to become obnoxious when he’d linger in my doorway and mutter to himself, audibly enough, that my room and lifestyle were ‘foul’.
While at the bar, I’d witnessed him throw an unlikable man’s unattended wallet into the trash, so when my cellphone went missing I had my suspicions. Luckily enough it was noticed at a sorting plant, and the workers called ‘Mom’ and I was able to recover it.
I had a lot of fun with that conversation before ‘asking’ him to move out.
‘Wow, I must have thrown my phone out by accident. I can’t believe what an idiot I must have been to do that. Can you believe how utterly irresponsible and horrible I must have been, Nathan?’
Yeah, screw that guy.”
42. He Could Rant Forever If We Let Him
“Worst was a roommate that never did the dishes but would yell and throw a tantrum if he couldn’t find his knife or whatever from the dishes put away.
Said that it was a woman’s job to clean the house (and glare at me as I was the only female roomie left in the house after 2 girls moved out & I had 3 guy roomies) and that he didn’t have to clean.
But I and the other guys took turns cleaning. He never cleaned once.
Bills were in his name. They’d always be late. We didn’t care because they weren’t in our name, but he’d make up excuses, etc & our internet would get turned off.
He’d throw a tantrum if the internet cut out or lagged on League of Legends. One time he unplugged my computer when it was uploading a video to YouTube with less than a minute remaining cause his game was more important.
He didn’t work, well he ‘fixed computers & sold Magic cards’. He claimed the Government banned him from working till 2 years from now because he was with a friend that committed larceny years ago. He was offered regular work under the table & refused it.
He would rant all the time if we’d let him. He could rant about how the world was so unfair to him for hours.
He got $200+ in food stamps a month. I’d buy $60 in groceries of my hard-earned income & he’d eat a lot of it. He ate an entire box of twinkies I bought for everyone to share after asking if he could have one.
My significant other living with us had to pay his share of the rent one month. That was the month we decided to move out cause we were tired of his stunts.
(Lease was up next month). He also has a lot of my significant other’s computer parts inside his computer.
After we moved out, our other roommate took over the new lease & had to pay double security deposits on everything because our roommate was always late with the bills. This roommate said he had a new house to move into but that fell through. He asked to stay (rent-free) still after we moved out but was kicked out.
He now lives off another friend in a trailer. He still hasn’t paid my significant other back & still has some of his stuff.”
41. They Deprived Us Of Having Intimate Moments
“South London, a few years ago. When I moved in the Polish couple who lived there already said ‘although there’s a double bed in your room, it’s only being left to one person. You can’t move a significant other in there.’
Fair enough, I figured, I would expect to pay more if I did that. But that wasn’t what she meant… a few weeks later I got a new girl.
The first time she came over to stay my flatmate gave her a look of daggers when she went to the toilet in the middle of the night. A few minutes later, they were pounding on the bedroom door. I refused to answer it until my significant other said I had better. They let me know in no uncertain terms they weren’t happy. My significant other sneaked out in the morning.
At breakfast, we had a meeting where the female flatmate said my significant other couldn’t come over anymore. I responded ‘She’s not moving in. What, so you two are entitled to intimate moments, but I’m not?’ Apparently, that was how it was going to be. My significant other refused to come to my place anymore.
A few weeks later I got an eviction notice in the post from the landlord. The Polish couple got nothing, so they must have organized it. I was happy to go…”
40. Nasty Roommate Rubs His Feet On The Floor
“He had an odd foot fetish where he could never wear shoes or even socks while indoors. He would also need to rub and wipe his bare feet on everything. If he came into my room to talk to me he had the habit of walking over to my barbell laying on the floor and just rubbing his feet all over the bar while nonchalantly discussing something.
I honestly don’t even think he realized he did it. Watching tv? Feet on the coffee table sensuously stroking the corners with the soles of his feet. Standing in the kitchen making food? Wiping his feet on the floor like a stationary moonwalk. The freaky thing was it looked like it was a caress more than a wipe. As if he was satisfied with the feet rubbing. Luckily he was military and gone every weekend and he really only used the apartment as a place to sleep.”
39. She Turned Against Me
“Off at university, I shared a 5 bedroom house with 4 other guys. I also had a significant other who I’d been with for 4 years. She lived a few roads away but fell out with her housemates. I told her she could stay with me till they all got their heads clear and patched things up.
But she got comfortable living with me and pretty much moved in.
This is where her mental instabilities started to kick in. Being stuck with each other in one small bedroom must have been the trigger. She turned against me, became resentful. The arguments we had were absolutely mental. Screaming at each other as much as our lungs allowed. Then it became violent, she destroyed my things, threw my games console out the window. This quickly escalated to her beating me.
I’d hold her down on the bed to get her to stop, which would make her angrier. Then we’d realize what we were doing and make up by hooking up. It was pretty messed up. And the cycle came around every two days.
My housemates during these moments would cower in their rooms. They wanted her to leave but were too scared to say anything. I feel horribly bad about it now.
At the time I was so invested in my significant other, as much as I hated her, but I couldn’t see that I simply needed to kick her out and end things. First love and all that stuff I guess.
Thankfully I have been broken up with her for over a year now. It’s dead and buried. But for those housemates, their first year at university won’t have such fond memories because of what I introduced.”
38. He Falls Asleep In The Bath Tub
“Old roommate from Uni. Obviously, a smart guy, doing physics at a reputable university. Freshers he was an excitable, quirky dude who liked funny hats and hosting ridiculous parties.
Moved in with him and two girls. Turned out he was a nutjob. Always stayed up in the kitchen early in the morning doing substances or falling asleep in the bathtub for hours. Somehow remained sweaty with greasy hair and rags as clothes.
His room was a mess (not our problem really) so he always holed up in the kitchen.
Repeatedly brought 30-40 people over in the middle of the night, unannounced. Apparently, he told everyone he met at clubs the afterparty was at ours.
We got away more or less scot-free though, as the next flat he lived in got raided in a bust for dealing. Oh, he apparently got busted for hacking several high-security organizations, too.”
37. We Hated Each Other's Guts
“When I was dealing (strawberries of course) in college, my roommate stole $1600 from me and blamed it on another dealer (the ensuing events nearly landing both of us in jail), turned off all my alarms during finals week causing me to sleep through 2 out of 4 finals I had, and convinced all of my significant other’s friends that I was two-timing her so he could conveniently be there for her to spite-sleep with to get back at me.
But hey, I slept with his high school crush in his bed when she came to visit him, disenrolled him from one of his required courses a day before the add/drop period ended (who needs hacking when you know where the passwords.doc is on his gaming desktop?)… oh… and I destroyed his Carrier and 2 Battleships and donated all his ISK to the first group I saw in EVE.
I like to think of our time as roommates as if Frank Underwood and Tywin Lannister had been roommates and just hated each other’s guts..”
36. Two Roommates' Weirdness Are Unbearable
“When I first moved to Atlanta I had a roommate named Don from Florida. He was about 22, tall and skinny with a high-pitched voice. He was covered in acne. We knew this because he would walk around wearing only boxers and he’d have bloody scabs on his body and a few bandaids. He wouldn’t shut his bathroom door when taking a dump. He wouldn’t flush either.
He’d regularly shout and punch things. His computer was dented on top from slamming his fist down on it. He’d throw garbage and leftover food off the balcony (we were in a second-floor apartment). He was a complete jerk.
The other one was another roommate’s significant other who lived with us for a while. He was just out of jail. He stole my roommate’s truck and left the state with a girl he met on Yahoo chat.
Then he came back one day and threw a brick through the window to break in and trashed the house while I hid in a bedroom on the phone with 911. He accidentally cut his wrist while reaching through the broken window and sprayed blood all over the place. He was picked up by the cops at a motel room where he and the girl had taken too many pills. Last I heard he was in a mental institution.”
35. She Almost Burned The House Down
“I’ve had a few bad roommates, but the WORST roommate I’ve ever had was Lauren. This woman was crazy. She was out at the bar 4 out of 7 nights a week and the other 3 nights she wasn’t out at the bar, she was drinking straight booze at the house. Like bottles a week. I went to the bar with my significant other one night and saw her and pretended that I didn’t see her, but she noticed me and said hi so I had to go over there and try and be friendly with her.
She starts loudly saying ‘why does no guy want to sleep with me?’ multiple times during our conversation… Drawing the attention of almost every other guy in the tiny bar and I didn’t want anyone to think I was the same type of girl as her. Anyway, I excused myself and went back to talk with my significant other. Lauren went over to some guy’s place at the end of the night.
And the reason she was complaining about no guy wanting to sleep with her was that she told me she was naughty texting some guy that she slept with before and he said he would come over, but he didn’t which was smart of him because this girl was a nutcase. She would try and talk to me all the time about her problems in life when I just wanted to study or play some League of Legends.
She was in a ‘relationship’ with her best friend’s significant other for a few months and kept thinking he would leave his significant other to be with her. He didn’t and her whole group of friends found out eventually and ostracized her.
She thought my significant other wanted to sleep with her just because my significant other said hi to her whenever she was around. He literally just said hi because I said to be nice to her and didn’t even make small talk.
Like dude, my man is not interested in you. She’s like a short ginger girl who is massively overweight like 200+ pounds and delusional about how attractive she really is. She told me that she thinks she’s every guy in her life’s Manic Pixie Dream Girl.
Also, she would constantly clog the toilet with poop and just leave it there brewing and then made me and the rest of the roommates clean it and not confess to it.
I knew it was her because the first year someone did it and then the second year when all the other roommates besides her graduated it happened again! Like she took a dump and clogged it and then just left it there and went out to the bar or something.
Oh, and she almost burned down the house once. She came home wasted and tried to cook ramen in a pot, but didn’t add water so the ramen burned.
I and my other roommate saw smoke upstairs and were like what the heck when the smoke alarms went off. The entire downstairs was full of smoke and Lauren was passed out in the downstairs bathroom because she was so wasted. We had to call the fire department at 4 am to get the smoke out of the house and we had to drag her useless self out the door so she didn’t suffer from smoke inhalation.”
34. He Showered The Bathroom With Poop
“My worst roommate ever was a real weirdo. The landlord basically gave him the room without asking or consulting us, so we didn’t know anything about him until he arrived. Turned out he came from a mental institution, was given a small budget each day, and spent most of it on substances (this was in the Netherlands). Didn’t take long until incidents started happening. Here’s some of them:
Threatened to kill one of my roommates because his music was too loud or something.
The landlord didn’t care, the other roommate moved out a week later.
Completely messed up another roommate’s door trying to get in while she was gone. Must have been scared off by something before he could finish, because he’d nearly broken through. She moved out the next day. The landlord still didn’t care.
My turn. Kicked in my door, stole some cash, and (amusingly) three of the six beers I had in the fridge.
Nothing else, thankfully. Landlord? No care was given.
Pooped in plastic bags and threw them out on the roof. Probably during the many times, police would knock on his door and he was pretending to be out.
Clogged our toilet and got poop all over the bathroom, a really disgusting mess.
Had no money for food, apparently, so he wanted to buy some bread from us. With toothpaste.
There’s more, but that’s about the worst of it. So relieved when he finally left. I loved that room and was not about to leave because of him.”
33. Finally, I Managed To Get Both Of Them Home
“My roommate and I moved in together this past September. Around November his significant other got a new job near us and he asked how I felt about him moving in. I’d met him a couple of times up to that point, and he seemed alright to me, so I had no problems with it. That’s when things got mildly out of control.
Seeing as how it was still football season, and we were dedicated alumni, we still tailgated regularly.
At one such game, the roommate’s significant other got really wasted. I’ll just give you a list of some of the glorious things that transpired that evening: slapped my friend in the face from the backseat of my car, demanded to be taken to the train station so he could go back to NYC and never speak to my friend again, ran away as soon as we got to the house, without a cell phone or anything else useful on him, slapped my friend while fighting on a bridge, kicked my friend so hard he fell to his knees, ran across a street (still wasted) and almost got hit by a car, refused to get in a car after I came to pick them up, screaming and crying hysterically in the streets.
After much counseling and arguing with both of them I managed to get both of them home, but not before also losing my friend during the course of the evening. The best, and worst, part is that the next morning they couldn’t have been happier. Things have continued in this manner until last week when they moved out. I have decided that his significant other is clearly a sociopath and doesn’t understand the delicate art of conversation or being social at all.
His last note to me along with my check for utilities was as follows, totally unprompted I might add, ‘You’re not getting anything else. Just cash it.'”
32. He Puts Rotting Compost In The Recycling Bin
“He would put compost in the recycling. It happened once, and I and the other roommate thought, why that’s strange, he didn’t know the recycling people won’t take it if it’s contaminated. So we told him. Not to mention the little note the recycling men attached to our blue box to explain why they didn’t take it. He flat out refused to believe it. Rotten avocado one week, some potting soil, and a dead plant another.
We just stopped recycling.
He also would not allow wireless internet because the wifi signal supposedly gave him a headache. I thought that was odd but possibly true, so I tried to think of an alternative to having to drag a cord across the house to my room for Internet, so I got one of those things that plug in the router, carries the signal through the sockets, where you can pick it up in another room (my room). I didn’t tell him because it wasn’t wifi, so I honestly thought it wouldn’t matter, but when he saw it and found out what it did, he was annoyed and banned that too. I concluded he just didn’t want me to have Internet access, or be online unless he knew. What a jerk.”
31. They Practiced Their Duck Calls For Hours
“I moved in with two acquaintances in college for one semester. One.
I got the middle-sized bedroom because when their old roommate moved out he took the living room setup with him: couch, TV, speakers, etc. I brought mine over and set them up.
One of my roommates and his buddy would come over and watch duck calling videos and practice their duck calls for two to three hours while I was trying to study.
Like on a weekly basis. Horrible.
When the semester was up, I paid through the end of the month and moved four hours away for an internship. My next house with some other friends wasn’t available till the end of the month, he demanded that I move all of my stuff early so his friend who was taking my room could move in early. I told him I couldn’t and he blew up, telling me that I should move all my stuff (I owned a lot of stuff) to the garage for the rest of the month.
I didn’t want to make my stuff that much easier to steal, get dirty, or move it twice and his friend was unwilling to pay out my rent till the end of the month anyway.
I came back into town at the end of the month anyway and I found my locked door replaced (he kicked in the lock), the new guy’s stuff was in my room, and all of my stuff was in the garage. My plan was to stay the weekend and move on Sunday when some friends were in town to help out, but I ended up having to move by myself so I had a place to sleep.
Neither he, the new roommate, or the landlord cared to reimburse me for the remainder of the month, or my now dirty property from the garage concrete.”
30. I Lived With Satan And Another Awful Roommate
“Originally, this was the full story of our roommate shenanigans over the past two years, but it turned into a 5-page long google doc and so I’ve cut out all but the very worst of our roommates. I should mention over the course of 2 years, we had 6 official roommates and a couple of homeless acquaintances who somehow always seemed to wind up on our couch.
But this is the story of the worst roommates ever, Satan and Luka.
Where do I begin? Satan is the name this girl went by, it’s how she introduced herself and how we always knew her. Eventually, we found out her real name, but it didn’t matter. Satan was more appropriate. We first met Satan when our other idiot ex-roommate, Adrian, was living there. They were apparently friends, and Adrian invited Satan to live on our couch for two weeks.
No one ever asked us, but she was quiet and polite and clean and gave us money when she could, so we didn’t stress about it. Then she wanted to know if she could move her and his dog into our living room, and we put our foot down, so she left. Fast forward to months later, we’re having a get-together with a few friends and we’re completely trashed.
It’s midnight and someone knocks on the door. It’s Satan and her creepy significant other. Apparently, they are still homeless and have been living in a tent. A storm is coming and they want to know if they can crash on our couch for the night. Super wasted, we agree. That first night I should have known something was off. They tore into our booze, Luka would not keep his clothes on.
We laughed it off. Somehow, they talked their way into letting us rent our third bedroom by the week. Okay, whatever, no big deal, right? Wrong.
All of a sudden they have taken over our house. Satan’s two dead cars (both of which she wrecked in accidents and then had just been towing and parking wherever she could) were suddenly next to our townhouse, against our lease terms.
She brought in her two male cats, who were not neutered, had not had any shots, and had never had flea prevention put on them. She did this without permission when we already have two cats and a dog in the house. Her cats immediately started spray marking everything and trying to fight my cats, so we told her absolutely not. So she just put them outside, since apparently, they were indoor/outdoor cats.
We immediately were infested with fleas, I mean, mere days after they moved in. There were weapons and knives all over our house and decorating our walls. I had multiple fights with them over that, because I have PTSD and can not under any circumstances have that stuff out and around me. They would only ever shower together and hook up loudly in our shower. They would frequently have violent, screaming arguments in the hallway outside our room at 3 or 4 in the morning, most of which turned into brawls.
They were equally violent to each other, there was no true abuser there, but Luka would wait until Satan was asleep, come into our room, and tell us that he was being abused and beaten by Satan regularly. He wouldn’t let us call the police or any counselors, but he wanted us to ‘stop her’ or ‘do something’. Um, like what?!
Also, I should mention, Luka was a pathological liar in the worst way.
He made up multiple medical conditions, including epilepsy. He faked several seizures in our house. I know they were faked, because 1) I actually have had seizures and 2) He would be laughing and holding a conversation through a ‘seizure’ (him flailing around and giggling, ‘accidentally’ kicking people, he would even get distracted and forget to jerk around for a few seconds and then would start up again and say ‘Oh I guess it’s not done yet, just have to ride it out!’).
He lied and claimed to have had a daughter who died, (found out he made it all up) claimed his best friend was murdered by his ex and everyone knew it but no one did anything about it? He claimed to have been abused multiple times by people that we brought up in passing. (‘Yeah this kid I knew, Bobby,’ ‘Bobby? With brown hair? I hate that piece of garbage, he abused me!!’ -two weeks later- ‘We met this kid named Loki in the mall’ ‘HE ABUSED ME I HOPE HE DIES’).
As an abuse survivor, I’m hesitant to say that people are lying about abuse ever, but Luka would do this frequently and then totally forget he said that later. It was horrible and incredibly triggering for me.
Luka for some reason just never learned how to take care of himself growing up, and as a result, was one of the most pathetic adults I’d ever met. He set our microwave on fire twice because he couldn’t understand why you don’t put metal in the microwave.
He left our stove on for over 24 hours more than once. Satan had to cook every meal or else he would just not eat, and cry and whine all day about how hungry he was and how she starved him. Every meal she cooked though was deep-fried (using my pans and my oil, by the way) and they never cleaned up after themselves, ever. Multiple times I found them stealing my food, and when I confronted them about it, I was told ‘Oh, that was Luka, he thought that was ours because he doesn’t do any of the grocery shopping and didn’t know what I bought.’ Nonsense, but whatever.
I clearly divided the fridge space and put our names on EVERYTHING that was ours. I mean, I started marking the level of milk on the side of the gallon after every use. I was annoyed. And they kept doing it and tried to use the same excuse.
The day I finally snapped was literally over some bacon. I consider it a rare treat for myself and do not buy it often.
I had half a package hidden beneath our lunchmeats, in our drawer on our side of the fridge, clearly marked ‘THIS IS OP’S BACON. PLEASE DO NOT EAT.’ I come home after a hard day and decide to make breakfast for dinner, open up the fridge, and – it’s gone. I lost my mind. I mean, I snapped. I started screaming obscenities at the top of my lungs, physically pushed my SO out of my way, went upstairs, and kicked their door in.
That was when I learned I was in for a real surprise. All around their room was our stuff. Things they had clearly taken from the common spaces and our room. There was garbage everywhere, dirty dishes haphazardly piled in every corner, all of their clothes just strewn across the carpet with no clear distinction of what was clean or dirty. And the walls… there were smudges of God only knows what on the walls, but worse than that, they’d punched holes in the walls… all over the room.
I mean, the drywall was destroyed. It was such a disaster in there it actually took my breath away.
For a minute I forgot what I was so furious about, I was just in awe. I couldn’t even yell. ‘You ate my bacon. AGAIN, you ate my bacon.’
‘Oh, that must have been Luka, he didn’t know it was yours.’
‘It had my name on it.’
‘Well, he must have missed that.’
‘It was in my drawer, underneath my other labeled food.
There’s no way he missed it.’
‘Oh, well, I’ll buy you a new pack next week.’
After taking a calming breath so as to not scream at them, I said, ‘No, you won’t, because you won’t be here next week. You have until Friday to get all of your things out of my house and the rest of the rent you owe me. Anything you leave behind you forfeit.
End of story.’ And walked out. They tried to come to my SO instead but he too was fed up and held firm. They came to that Wednesday, with the three weeks of rent they owed us, and asked us if they could stay. We said no. Luka came to me crying, begging me not to throw him out. I told him to shut up. They left that Friday, glaring at us like we were the jerks.
They left most of their stuff behind, including their cats, both of which were eventually hit by cars. They blamed us for that later. We kept some of their stuff, we sold a lot of it to help pay for the damages to the townhouse they caused, and we threw out or gave away the rest. 3 months later they showed up at our door ‘to pick up their stuff’.
Are you kidding me? That was fun. Luka threatened me with a knife if we didn’t return their things. I shoved him off our porch and told him if we ever saw him again I was calling the cops. They only tried to come back once, when they tried to break in in the middle of the night and I shot them with their own BB gun.”
29. Her Family Messed Up Our Place
“When I was a freshman in college, my roommate was from an area 4 hours away and she had a baby AND a baby daddy. She had baby daddy drama because he knocked some chick up and to get back at him she decided to.. .sleep with a bunch of dudes and never tell him about it. That really wouldn’t be that bad in and of itself but she then proceeded to bring her men to our apartment.
One of them freaked out on her and started punching the wall and then threatened her with a knife. So, I couldn’t bring myself to even talk to her at this point. Then she decides to have her baby and her baby daddy MOVE IN WITH US. Which was absolutely messed up. None of them worked. They just stayed at the apartment all day as they smoked and freeloaded off this chick’s parents.
Meanwhile, her overgrown fetus kept messing the apartment up and he made gouge marks on our laminate wood flooring. I wanted to beat the ever-loving freak out of her, her baby daddy, and her baby. Instead, I settled for having them all evicted. We lived in student housing and you weren’t supposed to have ‘visitors’ there for more than 5 days at a time. Those idiots lived there for like, 5 weeks.”
28. His Kid Stood On My Laptop
“Throwing plastic cheese slice wrappers in the sink. THE TRASHCAN IS RIGHT 2 FEET AWAY!
Came home wasted every single night with 5-10 people being really loud.
We lived upstairs. Had an old couple living next door. A young child and his dad downstairs. And the floors and walls were paper thin. You can hear everything.
He would smoke in the living room despite my and my significant other’s warnings and spill over 15 lava red hot coals on my carpet! Oh my God! ! I’ve told you 10 times not to.
He liked to throw kitchen knives when we weren’t home. So I made the idiot buy spackling to cover his blade holes.
Just bought a new laptop. 1200$. I see his little spawn of a 3-year-old STANDING ON IT. You are sitting RIGHT THERE KNOWING THAT’S A NEW LAPTOP, YOU MORON!
Poops and leaves it in the toilet.
Never buys food or hygiene supplies.
I saved his butt over 4 times cleaning up after his mess because his 3-year-old almost got taken away from him when child services would show up out of nowhere.
Ugh, last year was an awful year. Went through 2 couples and a single dad as roommates. All under 24. They all suck. Roommates suck. They lie, steal, and don’t pay. Stay home for the extra year before getting a roommate who isn’t mature enough to wipe their own butt.”
27. The Worst Part Is He Takes Long Showers
“HIS name was Kelly. And he was a pretty awful roommate.
Where do I start? I suppose I’ll just list it.
On the first day in our dorm room freshman year, he showed up late at night and had his whole family help him ‘decontaminate’ the entire room.
His mom and dad would also come and help him do laundry, go shopping, and even make his bed in the early hours of the weekend.
Right before I ended up leaving (in the middle of the semester) he started spraying isopropyl (rubbing) disinfectant on the floor’s walls and essentially anything he touched regularly.
It gave me a horrible lung infection that lasted through 2 rounds of performance-enhancing substances and 2 and 1/2 months.
He took really long showers. I’m talking 6-8 hours in the bathroom at a time. It was so bad the room below us had to call maintenance probably a dozen times because our shower would leak into theirs for a good 6-8 hours every night.
One of the times maintenance was in our shower, they sealed it up and we couldn’t use it until the next night. He left me a note telling me not to use the shower.
One day he cleaned the bathroom wearing full medical scrubs. He was definitely not pre-med, he was an engineering student. That creeped me out big time.
He would set his alarm for 4:30 am and let it go off for up to an hour and a half sometimes.
Then he would get back into bed until sometime after I left at 7:00 am.
The times he didn’t go back to bed he would clean the whole room with disinfectant until after I left.
During the weekends he usually left his alarm on. I would just unplug it if he did.
I always keep the door closed but he would ALWAYS come into the room, even for a second, and leave the door open. Even after I closed it RIGHT behind him multiple times.
He would ALWAYS leave his bright desk lamp on all night. Which was pointed toward my bed.
He brought people over in the early hours of the morning to work on schoolwork (I’m assuming) but they would be really loud.”
26. She Initiates Awkward Conversations
“This girl I used to live with lied about our rent going up and then pocketed the extra $15/week she had me pay. I only found out when I heard her bragging to her friends when she didn’t know I was home. Her justification was that she did most of the housework so she should get extra for it. OK… maybe that was true, but the idiot made most of the mess! I rarely used the common areas (I am a hermit) and cleaned up after myself when I did.
Meanwhile, she cooked every night and had friends over nearly every day. Even if she did have a small point, she could have said something. I might have even agreed to pay extra to not have to help out with the housework and actually let her do all of it. It was the sneaky lying thieving aspect of it all that annoyed me the most.
And she always ranted if I tried to have friends over because she ‘had to get up super early in the morning’.
Meanwhile, that never stopped her and I had to get up equally early.
She ate my food. We paid for our own stuff but mine was constantly missing. I don’t know if anyone is like me, but when I was single I would buy things in the exact quantity I would need to make x amount of meals out of it. So I always got annoyed when I was missing ingredients.
She was ridiculously open about her intimate life and brought home the creepiest guys. It actually got to the point that I felt unsafe because of the vibes I was getting from these dudes. Turns out she found out one of them was scamming her and wanted for assault. Awesome.
She was growing substances in her closet despite knowing that I was on a visa that could be revoked for any illegal activity. Stressed me out for a few months until she finally managed to sell it.
That’s probably about it. Not long after finding out about the money thing, I moved in with one of my best friends who turned out to be the best roommate ever.”
25. He Lied To My Face When I Confronted Him
“So the first one I was actually really good friends with. I didn’t start disliking him until about 2 months into living with him. That’s when I noticed he hadn’t cleaned up once. Not once in two months. He never pitched on groceries, constantly left all the lights on, would spend HOURS playing with his phone while contributing nothing to the conversation. He always left the pull tab for the shower pulled up so I’d get blasted with cold water when I turned the shower on.
Menial things like that.
We also worked together selling Halloween costumes at one point. He’d follow me around like a lost puppy all day. A few friends came in and I ended up discounting their costumes because they were ‘damaged’. All neat and cool, EVERYONE at the store did it at some point. So my boss is talking to me the next day and she says ‘So I heard you gave your friends a discount.’ I asked where she heard that and she tells me said roommate had told her.
Fast forward to when I confronted him about it, all he can say is ‘No man I didn’t say anything to her.’ Legit, flat out lying to my face about it. Completely lost all the trust I had in him at that point.
Then the day came where I had the worst day at work. I more or less bared my soul to the guy. Totally unhappy with how I was being treated at work.
I had a solid 5-minute straight rant about how unhappy I was. I finished up by asking something to the effect of ‘Are you guys hiring/where can I find work?’ His response? ‘Yeah.’ I asked if he’d paid any attention to anything I said and this jerk had the nerve to ask me to repeat myself. Sorry man, pay attention when I’m asking for some advice.
Roommate #2: Basically had every trait that the idiot before her had. This girl though must have weighed 500 lbs at the bare minimum. I lived with her for two months and during that time she never once took a shower, much less even left her room. She had the worst stink I had ever smelled, like a serious yeast infection. You couldn’t go anywhere within 20 feet of the bathroom when she was done.
She complained how she could never lose weight but never mentioned the fact that she just sat around eating chips and sugar playing Minecraft.
When she moved out she ended up leaving her disgusting swear-stained mattress, chocolate bar wrappers, pizza boxes (literally over 30 of them) with donair sauce still in them. It took 2 weeks for me to clear the stink out of that room.”
24. He's A Show-Off But In An Annoying Way
“I had a housemate in grad school who was probably the most annoying person I’ve ever met. He was a Japanese-Canadian in the psychiatry program. He was obsessed with showing off on social media that he was living in New York. He blasted that trash ‘New York’ Jay-Z Alicia Keys song on repeat from his room with the door open as if he was doing us all a favor by providing the soundtrack of our lives.
And I’m from New Jersey, living in New York isn’t really a big deal to me, and that song blows.
He decided early in the school year that his room was too small and moved all his stuff into the common room. He took over that space which included the kitchen and dining area. His stuff was everywhere. He burnt sausages at 3:00 AM and set off the smoke alarm.
The fire department came and woke us all up and he just stood there looking stupid and didn’t apologize. He never did his own dishes, letting them pile up in the sink until someone wrote ‘everyone’ a passive-aggressive note on the fridge. He ate other people’s leftovers.
He would go clubbing, tell girls he’s a doctor and sleep with them, then tell you all about it like he was a God.
The dude had no shame. He got a huge kick out of correcting people when they used ‘further’ instead of ‘farther.’ He would read Nietzsche to you like it was mind-blowing stuff when really he was reading the most mundane passages. He had a girl he was obsessed with and he would constantly be asking you for advice on how to impress her or what she is thinking or if she is gonna visit what should they do or any questions of that source. He was endlessly overthinking her every move and his every move in relation to her.
None of this stuff warrants moving out or getting him kicked out, which was the worst part. It was bad enough that it sucked, but not bad enough to make it unbearable. Just barely bearable.”
23. They Tried To Block Me So I Got Off The Lease
“In college. Dad recently passed away. Roommate/best-friend was getting treated for depression. A couple sharing a bedroom and living with us tease him about seeing a therapist. Seethe.
Wake up. Make obvious LiveJournal post/rant about it that doesn’t name names, but they will know what it’s about when they see it. Both flip out. Boy breaks down bedroom door when I sneak in at night to sleep (drama was playing out when I was at classes all day).
They try to blackmail me with pictures of my substances, even though both of them had smoked with me in that house at least once.
I don’t want to call the cops. I call my friends and get out of there. I get off the lease. My best friend moves out with me, and we both get a new apartment with my then-significant other, now-wife.
If they are reading this, I hope for their children’s sake, they are doing well, but it was one of the worst things anybody has ever done to me in my life, especially in the aftermath of my dad’s death, and I hope if either one of them reads this they think ‘Oh God, we were jerks in college’ and not ‘God, what a whiny jerk. SHE HAD A COMPLEX!'”
22. All They Do Is Shout At Each Other
“I had two roommates who were able to keep me and my bunkmate up until 3 in the morning eating noodles, with my door closed. Those doors might not be very soundproof but that is not cool. I would make a little noise at 2 in the afternoon (playing with friends or something online), one of them would hit on the wall and yell at me to be quiet because he was trying to sleep.
Not to mention, these guys were loud!!! They were practically yelling at each other and were only 2 feet from one another. The best one would be they would occasionally say my name and I would look at them and one of them would just say, ‘not you’. How many other people with my name do you know? Not many I can damn well say.
They also would multiply, and again ALL BE LOUD! For no damn reason, sitting right next to each other, yelling into each other’s ears.
I and my bunkmate hated them.”
21. I Ended Up Taking Care Of His Cat
“We both adopted a cat about 6 months ago and it was great for the first month because who wouldn’t want to take care of a kitten? Then I rescued another kitten from outside and we agreed that he would pay whatever future bills for the first cat from then on and I’d pay for mine. Fast forward 5 months and he’s cleaned the litter box less than 5 days each month, fed the cats only when I am out of town, and refused to take his cat to the vet to get a checkup and vaccinations.
I ended up taking his cat to the vet for him as long as he picked him up, he forgot to pay when he picked the cat up because I guess he thought it was free… and so he made me go for him to pay because he was ‘busy’.
He doesn’t do any dishes, he drinks coffee every morning and leaves it in the sink for days until we run out of clean ones. If I try to talk to him about anything he’s doing that bothers me he clams up and tells me to shut up and stop constantly until I drop it.
But overall the best roommate I’ve ever had, I’m completely happy living with him because he’s great to talk to and we’ve bonded a lot in the past couple of years.”
20. He Tried To Bribe The New Guy With A Free Couch
“We live in apartment-style dorms so it’s a 4 bed 4 bath with kitchen and each person has a contract for one full year. In addition, you can’t just pay a fee and terminate the contract, you have to find someone else to take over your space if you want to leave.
It’s a weird system but it is clearly stated in the contract so legally they’re covered.
L and Kira both wanted to leave the building but for DRASTICALLY different reasons: L couldn’t afford to continue living there and Kira just wanted to move closer to the beach (and farther from school I might add). So they both have to find a person to pay for their respective rooms. Both of them are failing and it’s coming close to the end of the month (the rent is due on the 1st so they need to get someone moved in by then).
BUT luckily L finds a guy through a mutual friend. And L is a good guy like seriously I was glad to hear he found someone to transfer his contract to. But then Kira has to show up and mess things up… as L is showing the new guy the apartment and the room Kira comes up and tries to STEAL the new guy away from L.
He offers to pay the new guy and give him a free couch if he signs his contract over L’s.
Let me remind you, L is moving because he HAS to. Kira is moving because he WANTS to, but I swear to bob Kira said this to my face, ‘Hey we’re in the SAME position and I’m just looking out for me you know?’ No, I don’t.
Go fall out of a window you jerk.
Luckily I didn’t punch him in the face, they both found people in time and L is much happier and I hope Kira is failing school.
P.S. Kira now pays more in rent. Travels at least 6x the time to get to school now and I’m sure it’s only a matter of time until he burns down his apartment (he’s infamous for leaving the oven on for hours).”
19. Neat Freak Roommate Cleans Common Areas Passive Aggressively
“I’m sure my ex-roommate thinks I’m the worst roommate ever and she’s the only roommate I’ve had. She was a neat freak and I was not. But I never left a mess in common areas, just in my room, and even that was in the vein of clothes on the floor, nothing gross. She would clean the common areas very frequently and be passive-aggressive because she thought I didn’t help out enough.
All she had to do was ask, but she would just do it herself then brood.
One time she got so wasted she passed out in our living room and started puking while still passed out. It was scary but I knew her family was a bit conservative so didn’t want to call an ambulance and get her in trouble (she was underage). So I slapped her awake and made sure she wouldn’t choke on her own vomit, then cleaned up all of her puke which was a profuse amount.
But no thank you or anything the next day.
She also started forbidding me from having my significant other over on weekends even though when she still had a significant other she’d have him over constantly. I guess once she didn’t have a partner anymore her rules changed.
One time I ended up hospitalized and asked her to bring some of my clothes over and that they were IN the laundry hamper because I hadn’t put them away after laundry. Somehow she could not comprehend this and brought the few articles of clothing that weren’t in the hamper then didn’t want to have anything to do with me for the rest of the time I was hospitalized.
After being perfectly friendly after I moved out and coming to the housewarming for my new place, she unfriended me on social media. I do not like her.”
18. Earplugs Are Useless In This Case
“I had a roommate for my first two years at college who seemed normal at first. But then again, our first room had a wall divider… Anyway, so year two: She always always always had the tv blasting all hours of the day. We had decided early on that anything we brought we weren’t sharing. Boundaries are good. Except when I would come back after every weekend and ALL of my dishes were stacked in our very tiny sink.
Her wet laundry lied all over my furniture and the room smelled of dead fish.
One time I came home and all of my desk and bed furnishings were blatantly moved around. Don’t want to know what happened there, to be honest. She would also spend 3 hours in our bathroom to the point where if I needed to use a bathroom I had to go 13 floors down to the basement to use a community bathroom. She also snored worse than a truck driver. Earplugs couldn’t drown out the sound she made. One night I turned the light on to see why she was making this ungodly gargling noise and she was contorted in her sleep Exorcism of Emily Rose style. I don’t speak to her anymore.”
17. He Tried To Save His Dying Grades
“It was my uni roommate. The guy himself was an OK roommate but if you are a person with a lot of empathy, watching him through the year was just depressing.
We got along fine, to begin with, we were both techie people and he had a really nice desktop computer he had just gotten for uni and bragged up the graphics card and it was pretty cool.
The year started fine, going to classes, etc regularly, but at night the guy would stay up late playing games. At first, it was up until 2 every night, but he would be up in the morning and off to class.
As the months progressed though it got worse, he’d joined a clan and got really into it, starting to stay up until 4 or 5 nightly.
He started sleeping through morning classes. I tried to wake him up and get him going but he shrugged it off and told me the class didn’t grade attendance. His mom came to visit us and I overheard conversations about wasting their money on classes if he wouldn’t go but he kept reassuring her he would do fine.
Then it got worse, he got extremely introverted. Basically never left the room anymore.
Started skipping afternoon classes to practice for his clan unless there was a test. Didn’t go to lunch with everyone else. He was never terribly social but he never participated in the floor activities or went to see friends anymore. A bunch of us from the floor tried to talk to him but he wouldn’t hear it. A school counselor visited him a few times too trying to help him get on track.
Then the calls started, explaining to mom how he would change and fix his grades and get to class. He would stay up until 9-10 am at this point, sleep until 4-5, go to supper when he woke up, then play games all night again. He started to explain to mom how he could drop a class he was failing and he would do fine according to the counselor.
It apparently wasn’t fine, because by the end of the year he withdrew from all of his classes and left a few months before the end of the year because he literally had no way to fix it at this point.
I’ve always been a gamer but it was hard to watch someone go through all that and just not be able to give it up in favor of real life. I haven’t talked to him since.”
16. He Pretended To Be Me On Email
“I had one bad roommate, and he made up for all the good roommates I had before or since: he never washed the dishes. Before going on break for a week, I had everything cleaned. Came back, and he had dirtied everything. I bought a pie and offered him a piece. Left for an hour. He ate the whole pie. He had an annoying friend come over constantly and would watch ‘retro’ movies in the living room (right outside my door) at a loud volume.
(I fixed this by messing up the vertical synch – this was an old tv – so the picture would never stop moving. ‘Retro’ night stopped.)
He bought my old tv so he could use it in one of his ‘films’. Smashed it on the sidewalk outside our place and just left it there. He got wasted one night and hit his head on the ground. Took a frozen chicken out of the freezer to use as an icepack.
Left it on the counter. Woke up to a bloody half-thawed chicken on the counter. He propositioned the girls upstairs with an apple, who were very creeped out by him. Who then thought my other roommate and I were also creepy by association for several months.
He logged into my computer and used my email (this is back in the day where your IP gave you an email and you used it) to email someone else with the same name as him saying that ‘Hi, My name is also (creepy roommate’s name) and I also enjoy making naughty videos.'”
15. I Peed All Over His Clothes
“This probably makes me the worst roommate ever…
This was in college so we had a shared room and he was away for the weekend. After a night of drinking, I was blackout wasted. Had to pee in the middle of the night and got out of bed, only to walk over towards our shared dresser, open the bottom drawer, and pee in it. Proceeded to go back to sleep as if I’d walked all the way to the bathroom.
Now I have no memory of this ever happening. I should also note that our fridge was on top of our dresser and that we had our Brita spill out of the fridge earlier in the night.
So the next morning I’m cleaning up the massacre we made in the room from the get-together we had and I notice the drawer was somewhat open… and find the clothes are damp.
To me, I’m just thinking when we spilled in the fridge it trickled down and got in the drawer.
At this point, I should say that the bottom two drawers were his. My friend who was sleeping on the floor saw me get up and pee in the dresser but didn’t tell me this till almost a week later. So thinking I had spilled water from the fridge, I just let his clothes dry and told him the Brita spilled. He ended up having to wash my pee out of his clothes. Never told him that it was actually pee.”
14. They Trashed The Whole Place And Had A Ridiculous Bill
“Clogged the toilet, left it overflowing long enough that it leaked into five floors below us (dorm), and blamed it on me and my friend. She hadn’t slept there the night before and I was out from 5 am until 6 pm. I had already unclogged the toilet once, left them a note that it had been clogging, and what to do (including who to call).
They were in the dorm, by the way. Used my and my friend’s towels as a barricade at the bathroom door, and had used the shower as well.
I found the rug soaked throughout our room, water still going from the toilet. Thankfully no visible poop or anything. I turned the toilet off, went to tell the dorm supervisor what had happened. Found out that it had affected most of the rooms directly below us.
Filed an incident report. Moved out of the dorm a week later and commuted. My friend moved out, too.
In the end, the jerks spilled ketchup all over the place, marked up the walls, and broke the oven. They each had some ridiculous bill at the end and they tried to come after me and my friend, blaming us for it all. Neither of us paid a dime for the damages.”
13. Her Rabbits Trashed The Place
“She let her rabbits run around the house. Now, I don’t normally mind rabbits but these rabbits were the children of the Killer Rabbit. Unfortunately, I did not have a holy hand grenade to get rid of them.
They chewed through everything even when we had the wires in high places. The roommate would place them on the sofa and let them wreck the cover and pee all over it.
When they ate through our things in high places, she refused to pay for the damage because ‘we should have been safer’. She wouldn’t clean up after them until two weeks later because ‘rabbits poop too much there isn’t a point in cleaning every day’. Placed them on the counter where we prepared food and brushed their fur. Many times I had to throw away a sandwich because clumps of fur got in there.
They had foul tempers and would bite without warning if you were deemed too close. She refused to pay the bills until she knew that one of them didn’t have cancer. Yes, it’s a terrible disease but you just brought a £250 tablet, don’t tell me you don’t have enough for an operation on a seven-year-old rabbit plus bill. I still find poop even though they have been gone for two years.”
12. He Used Deodorant To Hide Horrible Smell
“My significant other and I lived in a 2 bedroom apartment together. Her older sister got kicked out of her house, so she moved in with us. Her significant other lived 45 mins away, so she would pick him up and he’d be around for a few days at a time.
Significant other and I break up, and she moves out. The girl’s sister leaves for work one day, while her significant other was at my place (which was normal).
However, she calls him and dumps him over the phone. I guess this dude also got kicked out of wherever he was living and had no place to go. He was an ok guy, so I let him stay with me while he figures things out. I get him a job where I worked, and he rode with me since he didn’t have a car. However, after a week, he stopped getting up for work.
He would sleep thru his alarm and me pounding on his door. So he gets fired. In the meantime, he’s in my apartment and eating all my food. He’s taking my dirty clothes from my bedroom and wearing them (socks and undershirts, mostly).
The final straw came when I found a big scratch on my glass coffee table. I told him I wanted him out by the end of the week.
He stayed right up until Saturday night when he just disappeared. I never heard from him again.
I went into his bedroom and was horrified. He had been sleeping on my air mattress (which I let him) and I guess he slept unbathed and without clothes every night as it was just nasty. I found a lot of my socks, worn dirty for so long that they were turning a brownish-orange and could stand up on their own. He also wiped deodorant all over the walls in an attempt to hide the horrible smell.
I’m almost certain that he never showered, as the bathroom was pretty much untouched during his stay. And I know he never did laundry, since he had literally 0 dollars and the machines took about $3 in quarters to do a load.”
11. Lazy Roommate Gave Me Five Reasons To Hate Him
“First, my worst roommate would lay on the only couch in the house from when he got home until when he decided to go to class/work. He would ALWAYS leave the TV on and fairly loud, even when I went to bed. My bedroom had a designer door on it that had some fogged glass windows, so I would always have the TV light in my room.
Second, he would ALWAYS eat fast food and order a large soda. When he was done, you would think he would put them both in the trash right? Nay, he would put them on the floor beside the couch. This would happen so often that the pile would start falling onto the couch while he slept. I cleaned up after him for a few months, but I got tired of it and these were the results.
Third, of course, he would NEVER clean.
Fourth, ONE time I put all of his stuff in front of his bedroom door, maybe so he would get the hint. He then picked ONE cup out of it that was mine. From that point on he would ALWAYS say that he wasn’t picking up because I didn’t. I was so livid.
Fifth, he would complain when I would have company or women over. I would clean the house and he would get mad. He would go to his room and pout whenever I had people over.
I basically got to the point where I just went out for the day/night and never brought anyone back to the house. Then when his lease ran out, I made sure he wouldn’t be able to resign a new lease.”
10. His Dad Took His Xbox Away
“Heard stories before I went to college about bad roommates. You know stealing, not showering, being mean, etc. Thought no way that was gonna happen to me. But it did.
The guy wouldn’t clean up after himself, shoot, didn’t even clean himself. He’d roll out of his bed around 3 pm after I was completely done with class. I started at 5 am with ROTC and finished with regular class around 1ish.
He would then eat 3 hamburgers for lunch, with fries, every day. He gained his, and mine, freshman 15.
Not only did he smell bad, but his clothes also did too. He didn’t do laundry. I don’t think he knew how. So it would just reek in the room because of him. He would even complain about the smell and sit in the common room to escape it.
Then I would leave campus to go on trips with other friends and he would steal my drinks. Luckily my significant other at the time called him out on it. And then told me about it. He would steal my food as well.
He was in my history class with another guy on our floor. The study guide was literally 12 pages long for the final. We decided to divide it up, 4 pages each.
My roommate of course didn’t do it, so the other guy and I took the extra four pages and did them too. Hours of work. And we even gave him the study guide cause we didn’t want him to fail… he ended up not even going to the final anyway. Screw that kid.
Dad came the 5 hours one way to take his 360 away cause he was doing poorly. Even took some of my games thinking they were his. He flunked out, didn’t come back sophomore year.
And probably the worst thing about him was he introduced me to Dan the Beer man. Had to avoid Dan for four years after that… but that’s another story for another post.”
9. He Eats Everything In The Fridge
“I had this really weird roommate in college. It was a shared bedroom, L-shaped a bed in each corner but directly visible from one another.
Imagine someone so odd, that people would come to my Dorm (he would invite, they would refuse) but they were curious as to who lived with him, and wanted to meet me.
At the beginning of the semester, I was a freshman, so my parents got me a mini-fridge stocked with goodies.
Just bottled water, soda, chips, some instant meals nothing big, but like $150 worth which should have easily lasted a month or two. Heading out with some buddies, trying to be nice, offer him to ya know have something if he’s hungry or thirsty. Come back not more than 6 hours later, and he’s devoured everything in the fridge. After a few weeks of him being unable to understand that it’s not ok to take everything he wants from my fridge, (Like meetings with my RA, to explain that it’s not cool) I put a padlock on the fridge and had to keep a locked chest drawer in my room for consumables.
After locking him out of the fridge, he would store his food, usually leftover stuff from the cafeteria on the top shelf of his closet. Things like already cooked hamburgers, ice cream (that he would let melt, and then refreeze when he wanted it.) When I discovered this I was amazed he hadn’t died.
One time over spring break, when the Uni’s Cafeteria was closed, he shows up with food from the cafeteria, eating it. It had been closed for over a week. Also in the same spring break, while almost everyone went home or otherwise, he go into another student’s room, and lived there for the duration, using everything. Like their toothbrushes and slept in their beds with their sheets.”
8. His Cat Is A Spawn From The Underworld
“My first apartment was a duplex that I shared with two other guys. They both had male cats. Now, one of the cats was awesome. The other cat was a jerk that peed on everything. After the other cat ruined a couple of pieces of furniture my roommate and I told my other roommate that something had to be done. My other roommate’s answer was to keep his cat in his room at all times.
This roommate, who we’ll call Jim, was already a disgusting idiot. The center console in his car was a PILE of smoke ash and fast-food wrappers. His computer desk was LITTERED with Mt Dew cans and random stuff. The dude was gross. But when he moved his cat into his room he descended to new levels of horrible unkempt depravity.
Jim would just leave his cat in there day and night, sometimes it would stick its paw out from underneath the door like ‘HELP MEEEE.’ The cat puked all over the carpet and Jim NEVER CLEANED IT UP! He cleaned so infrequently that there were DREADLOCKS of cat hair draping off the little cat tree thing in his room.
What is probably the worst part is that he NEVER CLEANED THE LITTER BOX. His room smelled so bad, that in the summer when his door was closed and my door was closed I could STILL smell it.
When we moved out, the landlords had to strip his room to the floorboards to get the smell out. They kept our security deposit and sued us for another $1200. He ended up having no friends left that wanted to live with him and he had to move in with his brother in Florida. Which is a pretty just punishment if you ask me.”
7. We Got Arrested For Selling Her Stuff
“She stole from me and another housemate (plus ran up a large phone bill) before going off on holiday with parents for a couple of weeks.
She never returned, 6 months later we throw away her stuff (landlord’s request) and sell a couple of things (already contacted her mum and warned her this was going to happen – yes we actually gave her 6 months to repay and collect her stuff.)
Another 3 months after this (yea a total of 9 months after she ‘went on holiday’, on my housemate’s birthday) her mum showed up with a van expecting to pick up her stuff.
Obviously, there was very little left. An argument kicked off and they took what few remaining things there were (plus a few bits that weren’t hers anyway (toaster etc)).
A couple of weeks later the police come knocking, I and my housemate are being arrested for theft, they have CCTV evidence (us selling some of her stuff).
We go to the police station, substance tests, prints/DNA taken, several hours of statements taken.
Eventually, we are let out on bail and have to wait another 2 weeks for the CPS to process the case.
Eventually, I get the call from the police, nothing is going to happen, the housemate who stole from us kept changing her story (to get us into as much trouble as possible), mine and my other housemates were consistent and backed up by the landlord.
So turns out she was a psycho and a persistent liar who thought the world owed her everything.”
6. No Part Of The House Is Clean
“His name was Pete. He had super puffy nipples and the kind of upper body form that comes from a lot of creatine and protein powder without a lot of working out. I know this because he NEVER WORE A SHIRT. He was not a fan of boundaries. If I was in a room full of empty chairs, he would sit on the arm of the one where I sat.
He blasted his music at all hours. It was usually the same five Sublime songs over and over again. On two occasions he broke into my significant other’s house to try and sell us substances. It looked terrible.
He used to leave the shower running and the door to the bathroom wide open while he walked around the house in a towel. When asked why it was because he was ‘getting ready to shower.’ When he did actually use the shower, he kept the bathroom door open so he could hear his Sublime blasting from his bedroom.
He left his basketball shorts all over the house. I swear, he must have had over a hundred pairs of basketball shorts.
He always left hair in the sink. Face, chest, and pubic hair. He started a fight with the neighbor because their newborn cried too much. He was the landlord’s nephew and had been ‘made uncomfortable and had to leave’ his last three shared apartments. Screw that guy.”
5. His Room Stank Like Manure
“Laundry list, but for starters, he got kicked out by his other roommates for not paying and was the illegal 5th person in our house (college off-campus), so he had to lay low.
The kid brought more stuff into the house than the 4 of us combined – none of it furniture. Boxes and crates of nasty stuff that he ‘needed’.
Grew substances in his closet. Refined substances on our stove in our pots and pans.
Never cleaned, never bought food, never cooked, never contributed. Threw some here and there, but it was like pulling teeth for $200/month.
He fancied himself a DJ, so he’d be playing really bad amateur techno in his room all hours of the night. A room, that if I didn’t make clear, stunk like manure and was piled knee-high in the garbage.
He was the biggest creep you’d ever meet, watching him ‘hit on’ girls would make anyone cringe.
Over break (where he couldn’t afford to go home, so he stayed while we were gone), he made the whole house a wreck. We returned to find a mattress in the kitchen covered in meatballs, rice in the carpet, beer cans, and general trash everywhere.
We got home and started throwing his stuff in the yard while making him clean. He moved in with another mutual friend and did the same thing.”
4. Other Roommates' Things Got Broken Because Of Him
“The first was my freshman roommate who seemed like a nice enough guy for a while but was clearly emotionally unstable. I tried to be a friend to him, but he consistently told me how much he disliked my friends whom he never met other than in passing. I walked in on him on the phone crying and very emotional one night and he responded by screaming at me and my significant other to leave as I walked in.
I kind of gathered he was depressed, so I told my RA (who basically did nothing). I tried to get him to go to the counseling center, but I didn’t want to set him off. I say I didn’t want to set him off because he was really into violent video games and movies (in terms of obsessive behavior). He also bought (large, but pocket) knives every so often, which was a little unnerving at this point.
He also was super dirty, which didn’t bother me initially cause I was a teenage guy too, but it ended up getting to be very unsanitary.
By the end of my first semester, there was a pile of trash in his corner of the room that had made its way onto his bed. It was like the kind of stuff you see on those hoarder TV shows.
So that was pretty gross and I tried and tried to get him to clean up but to no avail. Then I think the worst part was he claimed to be cool with my significant other visiting (he wasn’t really an unpleasant guy for the most part) but then on several occasions had outbursts in which he told me it wasn’t okay (at which point I stopped staying in my room when she visited).
But to top it off, I remember very distinctly, she woke me up one morning (she was on the ‘outside’ and I was against the wall) while our room was still mostly dark (my bed was lofted on one side of the room and he was ground level on the other side) and she whispered to me to look over at his bed and I just saw him sitting cross-legged staring at us ‘sleeping’.
I ended up changing rooms to my now roommate of 4 years.
Scary stuff, I guess my RA did do something as the police did ask me some questions at one point about him but nothing seemed to come of it. I am happy to say he did end up going to counseling eventually and seems to have himself together now.
My second trash roommate was one of the three guys I lived with the two years following (I re-signed the lease after only two months with them).
All in all, he started selling illegal substances in my apartment without asking/okaying it with other roommates. I told him to stop/he was going to get busted because he was an idiot. The kid comes in wearing a wire, then the house gets raided by DEA/Local PD. The other roommates’ things get broken and rooms get destroyed in the process. He is facing 4 felonies and decides to become a rat as well.
The other roommates become socially isolated because of it. He then tried to ask our friends if they could hook him up with illegal substances.
Also, he sucked for a number of other reasons like letting his frat bros use and break our stuff, (no concrete proof) knowingly letting people take from the other roommates, putting liquid soap in the dishwasher, and flooding the kitchen (an honest mistake) but then not telling anyone and letting us find it a couple of days later, around finals no less! The tension in that apartment was quite high all the time, but it ended up working out okay because my roommate (now of 4 years) and I hated being in the apartment so we ended up branching out a lot and being able to focus on our schoolwork a lot more (and it paid off!).
(He also made outrageous/ridiculous claims all the time like you shouldn’t brush your teeth just floss, his dad was a dentist; it’s 25 F out we should put the A/C on 50 F to conserve energy.)
I don’t know which was worse. For some closure, my roommate and I now live with one other guy and we all get along really well and are about to graduate.”
3. Weird Guy Creeps People During Parties
“The first day with my new roommate I get home after work, in the evening. The house is dark with no lights on. I’m the only one home. I walk to the back door, unlock it, and walk inside. I start turning the lights on so I can see where I’m going. I start to feel like I’m being watched. I look into the dimly lit living room and my new roommate is sitting in a recliner, in the dark, staring at me.
I’m startled, but I play it off. ‘Whoa, Joe you freaked me out!’ I exclaimed. ‘I don’t like to waste electricity,’ Joe quietly responded.
Joe lied. He wasted a lot of electricity while we were roommates.
Fast forward a few years later. I have 2 roommates now, Joe and Bob (Made up names to protect the innocent). Everything has been tolerable. Joe creeps everyone out when we have parties.
He’ll sit in the back of a room with a drink in hand and stare at people. He was socially awkward.
Bob and I did our best to get Joe to be more outgoing. Until one day Joe dropped off the face of the Earth. Joe’s family lived hours away. So Bob and I figured he went to visit them. We were wrong. His family started calling us and asking if we have seen or heard from Joe.
We have not. A month has passed and we assume Joe is on a killing spree, locked up, or dead. One afternoon I receive a call on my phone from Joe. ‘Hey guy it’s Joe, I’m required to ask you something,’ he states. ‘Go ahead shoot’ I cautiously replied. ‘I was having bad thoughts so I went to a mental hospital,’ he mumbled. ‘Oh?’ I questioned.
‘I have to ask your permission to come back home,’ he said. A: I say no and he comes to get his stuff and kills me or B: I say yes and he moves back in and eventually kills me. Win-win situation. ‘Sure Joe you can come back,’ I reply.
Bob received the same call and gave the same response with the same feeling of impending doom.
A few days later Joe comes back looking like hot garbage. Out-of-control hair, stubbly beard, and an odder than normal glaze over his eyes (probably meds). Joe was in a zombie-like state for a week. Bob and I felt like we were walking on eggshells when Joe was around. A week later he seemed to be back to normal, his odd normal self I should say. Eventually, I moved out. Living in fear all the time is no way to live. I wonder how Joe is doing.”
2. There's A Smell Of Vomit Everywhere
“I was living with two dudes in my mid-twenties. One was never around. One, always. He worked a day job. He was enormous, as in, 6’5 and 250 or so.
He was also a self-proclaimed cook and loved having company over, every night.
Now, my line of work has me going to sleep around 10 and up before 5 am. To say the least, I was often woken up in the middle of the night/early (2-3 am) mornings by some sort of nonsense.
The worst thing he’s ever done? Have a bunch of friends come over and get wasted. Doesn’t sound so bad, right? Well, they get wasted and pass out, and I deem this an appropriate time to go pee, as I didn’t want to deal with them awake.
I start to walk down our hallway, wood floors mind you, and my leg slips out under me. I’m talking Home Alone type fall when he slips on the ice or something.
Somehow, I manage to grab the railing we had that lined the walls.
And then I smell it. There is vomit, everywhere. I almost broke my leg because either he or his jerk friend threw up and didn’t clean it up.
I was livid. I went and took a shower and caused one chaotic scene. A lot of apologies occurred.
Also, one time he woke me up at 3 am accidental. I walked out of my room and looked in the kitchen. In his hand, was a fully baked chicken. The idiot decided 3 am was a good time to bake a full chicken and eat it.
My lease ended the next month, I moved out. Screw that guy.”
1. She Refused To Take Care Of Her Unstable Mother
“I swear, if I encapsulated everything that has happened with my roommate, this would be a novel. But here’s the story so far: I have three roommates, for ease of story let’s establish that they’re myself (30sF), N (30sM), J (30sF), and H (60sF), and we all rent out from a landlord. Straight up H has always been strange, and has had a couple of health issues and emergencies, but has otherwise been okay.
Then in August, she started having really bad “episodes” where she would be confused, wandering the house unclothed, etc. She’s been in and out of the hospital several times, and her main point person has been her daughter A (20s or 30s), who is generally okay with being in communication with us.
For the sake of expediency here is a short list of some important details leading up to this past weekend.
1) she is bipolar and probably schizophrenic (she’s told me she is) and had to change her medications recently which is what she and her daughter have been blaming her behavior on – and that she also drinks while on these medications. 2) I have had a number of difficult conversations with her where I have expressed my concerns about her, in each conversation she has said that she’s perfectly fine now and then gets hospitalized again within a week or two.
3) Just after Thanksgiving I heard a scream and a crash, and found her in her room unclothed, face down, and struggling to breathe. Had I not been there she likely would have died. Since that hospitalization (which was the fourth or fifth since August, honestly they all start to blend together) she hasn’t seemed to recover. She was hospitalized again for some type of manic break and then was released again because “they said I was too sane”.
4) Besides having a number of welfare checks and EMT visits, I also brought up the situation with our landlord as an issue of liability (when she’s in these episodes she loves to try to cook and turns on all the cooking appliances in her confusion, amongst other activities that bring some damage risk), and I have also made a report with APS.
This weekend she really went off her rocker, and it was unreasonably difficult to get her help.
As I said, she has been in and out of the hospital and has still been not okay for a while, so she just nosedived from there. She was starting to talk more nonsensically and to herself more often, and then Saturday/Sunday night at 2:30 she is in the kitchen banging away at pots and pans, and talking to herself in a stream of consciousness blur.
I contact her daughter A and she says a mutual friend will come over to try to take her to the hospital. This family friend fails in her task, and in getting to overhear their conversation in the kitchen she tells this friend a ton of lies, including lies about me and how I’m doing all these things against her. Then A calls for a welfare check and the cops come by, talk to her a little, then leave.
It gets worse, we call again, the police come again, talk to her a little, then leave again.
Then Sunday/Monday night, 3:30 am, she’s banging away in the kitchen again, manically cleaning and talking to herself. We’re all sleep-deprived and we all go out at different points to try to get her to go back in her room and let us sleep, but she just keeps talking to herself and making noise.
J told her she was crazy and she just said “I’m crazy…” I contact her daughter several more times, and J calls A, and purportedly A cries to her and says “I don’t know what to do” and just tells us to keep calling 911. So we call 911 again, and this time four cops come over, which is four more cops than I ever want in my house, but they don’t take her because she “doesn’t fit the criteria” though they do tell me that she shouldn’t be living here and that her daughter should get a conservatorship.
They leave and I text A what they told me, she never responds. I email our landlord and tell him what’s happening, and J calls him.
H continues to decline, and she continues to keep the house awake. She wanders the hallways, talking to herself loudly and performing all sorts of compulsive actions, telling the person in her head all the horrible things I do to annoy her (like keeping my own toiletries in my own bathroom), and, as I found out later, trying to open the door to J’s room (we have been locking our doors at night in fear of this).
I text her daughter throughout the morning without response. At one point I call her and her kids are crying in the background so she asks if she can call me back later. She never does. J leaves for work and N holes up in his room trying to work. I dedicate myself to trying to contact her daughter or the mental health crisis line, neither of which can be reached.
After 10 N grabs me from my room and shows me that H is washing a remote control in the sink and that she’s grabbed pretty much everything that isn’t nailed down or in a cabinet, washing it, and throwing it away. She keeps talking stream of consciousness, accuses us of taking photos of her and searching stuff about her on our phones, and tries to put a metal tray in the microwave.
I call 911 again, really stress the whole accusing us of spying on her and the nearly setting the house on fire thing, and two more cops come to the house, which is an additional two more cops than I’d rather have in my home.
Here are some of the highlights from the last set of cops trying to interview H: 1) first of all, the cops asking me to call her daughter several times and getting to hear her send me straight to voicemail every single time.
2) me telling her that someone was here to see her and her telling me that she can’t figure out how to turn around. 3) the cop asking her if she tried to put metal in the microwave and she said “J did that at midnight last night and forgot about it, isn’t that such a crazy thing to do, she’s a nurse!” 4) her crazy ranting leading to them thinking she had a dead body in her room for a hot second.
5) her prattling on about all the things she has in her room, including her waterbed, and then saying “and on the right-hand side of my waterbed I keep my booze there because OP said she was worried about my drinking and I said that I wouldn’t drink as much but she said that I shouldn’t be drinking anyway on my medication so I keep my booze on that side of my bed so she doesn’t see it.” 6) her telling the cops how much I drive her crazy as they took her away and how proud I am of myself for not saying “same, jerk” whilst on bodycam.
I got in contact with our landlord, who also feels she should not be living here while she’s so unstable and hazardous, and he thinks she should be in a long term placement, but he needs to get in contact with A, who is dodging calls from all of us. It’s now been three days, so any 5150 hold should be up and we don’t know if she’s been admitted or if she’s coming back.
We haven’t heard anything from anyone so no one knows what’s happening. I have tried so many angles to help this woman and all it’s done has made me the primary target of her paranoia. I don’t know what else to do. My worst-case scenario plan is the three of us all pool together to find a three-bedroom place and all move out, but that just screws over our landlord, who is a good person who lost his job, and having to replace three renters is enough but he’d have to pay us all back our not-unsubstantial deposits all at the same time.
It does nothing to solve the problem with H and leaves our landlord with a single crazy tenant while sticking three new poor suckers in the middle of that situation. And moving out isn’t really an expense I can bear right now.
Turned into a novel anyway. Oh well, I’m mostly just yelling into the void anyway. There’s so little I can do about H – I’ve tried the landlord, APS, her daughter, the cops.
Someone needs to take responsibility for this woman because she’s a hazard. Her daughter infuriates me the most – she’s known that her mom hasn’t been okay for months and she’s just stuck her head in the sand and leaves us hanging. I understand if she doesn’t want to be responsible for her crazy mom, but someone has to because she can’t be responsible for herself. I’m done with this jerk, and that jerk too.”