People Spill The Deets About Their Foolish Revenge Plots
42. Neglect Your Kids Over A Pair Of Shoes? Not On My Watch
“In the late 90s, I worked for a major retail store that was well known for its ‘Open, Open, Open’ commercials. I was hired for seasonal work and quickly learned how to run every department and quickly was working solo in many of the departments.
Well the particular day in question, I was assigned to their shoe department. It was 20 minutes to closing and the customer walks in with 4 kids all under the age of 5. I had just finished cleaning up the department when she just left her kids to run wild while she looked for shoes in peace.
I was seeing red.
Her kids are in tattered shoes and their outfits aren’t much better while Over Entitled Mom is in really nice clothing and is wearing what I knew to be a $200 pair of shoes. Also, there is no way I’m staying late to clean up after her kids.
I was a nanny to large families and foster families before moving to the state I currently live in so I’m really good with kids. To top it off, at the time I’m 19 years old, and well I’m an extremely sarcastic, petty person.
Cue my revenge.
I go gather the kids as soon as she’s out of sight and in my sweetest nanny way, ask them if they want new shoes today? All 4 kids’ eyes light up and they are so excited that the nice lady said they get new shoes.
Well, I measure their feet and take them over to where the children’s shoes are. I let them pick shoes they want and not only make sure they fit but put the pairs of shoes on the kids.
As she stayed after closing, we had closed the metal doors to the mall so she’s locked inside the store.
She comes out with a $90 pair of shoes for her to see her kids all smiling holding shoe boxes and wearing shoes.
Over Entitled Mom starts telling the kids they didn’t come to get ‘them’ shoes but that mommy needed new shoes.
Cue the kids starting to bawl. The manager comes and the Over Entitled Mom starts getting uppity about how I needed to be fired for watching her kids while she ignored them and helping them find new shoes.
The manager takes the shoeboxes from the kids and looks at their old shoes and then looks at Over Entitled Mom with a are you serious look on her face.
She says well I’ve been watching security footage and noticed you left the kids without supervision as soon as you entered the store. Then she asks Over Entitled Mom if she would like to purchase the kid’s new shoes or if she would like us to call CPS and report her for negligence as we have all the proof needed to have her kids taken by CPS.
Over Entitled Mom turns red and throws the shoes she was going to buy back towards the women’s department and curtly told me to ring the kid’s shoes up.
She paid and stormed out (without a receipt… so no returns) with the kids who are all super happy that they got new shoes.”
41. Try To Cut The Line? We'll All Take Our Sweet Time
“Once upon a time, while I was minding my own business queuing at a store, an entitled person tried to get in front of everyone:
‘I am in a hurry,’ she said aggressively. ‘Let me go first I don’t have to wait like a dog,’ she added.
But the man waiting before me refused and pointed to the back of the queue at her. He was the 4th before checking out, I was the 6th, and she went to the back (a lot of people were waiting.) But even at the back of the line, she was still shouting at him, that she is important and has to go first, cursing everyone.
5 minutes later, and she’s still yelling, and of course, no security here to make her stop.
But then, came our hero’s turn. He took his time to pack his stuff while making eye contact with her, and with each item he put in a bag, he would just hesitate and do it again.
He often glanced at us, the common folks waiting for our turn, asking for forgiveness as he surely is wasting our time, but his petty revenge had to be fulfilled.
While she was still screaming, calling the whole of us birds names, the cashier was taking care of the people before me.
The couple also took their time to pack their stuff. And in this queue, a petty revenge friendship was born. We knew that we were wasting everybody’s time, but she had it coming. I also participated, and I hope the people after me did too. But hearing this woman cursing at us, making a scene, calling us jerks, was worth it.”
40. Won't Let Me Leave? I'll Expose Your Affair To Everyone
“This is a story from long long ago in a galaxy far far away. And by that I mean it happened 3 years ago at a pizza place I used to work.
I was a delivery driver for 6 years at various pizza places, picking up and moving on to greener pastures whenever it suited me.
Granted that only happened a couple of times because I am unfortunately a very loyal employee. To be honest I should have done that before this whole thing ever even happened.
The store I was at was part of a nationwide franchise, and the waters had gotten choppy.
All of the managers quit at once and they just couldn’t seem to get one to stick around. It got so bad that the Area Manager had to come in as acting GM and brought a manager from another store with him.
These two are the main characters of this story. Well, besides me, obviously. For the purpose of this story, we’ll call them Jeff and Cait and I’ll just be… me.
Jeff was 45 and had been with the company for a long time before I started, worked himself up from the position of driver all the way to being the one to oversee about 20 stores.
He was actually married to another Area Manager. I got along okay with Jeff for the most part.
On the other hand, Cait and I got on like a house on fire, both being ladies of a similar age. She often confided things in me that would soon bite her in the butt, figuratively.
I considered myself a decent employee as far as pizza slingers go, came to work on time, did all of the dishes, got along with everyone, and had the best delivery times. Because of this I usually landed all the best shifts, including opening on Saturdays.
If you’ve never worked a ‘tip’ job, you know that shift is the most coveted out there. Working through both the lunch and dinner rush before going home is well worth having to get up earlier.
That information is relevant to the story, trust me.
You see, there are always 2 drivers who do that shift. One comes in earlier and leaves earlier, and I was the one who got to come in just before we flipped on the ‘Open’ sign and went home once the dinner rush began to die down.
This is also relevant.
The final vital bit of info you need for context is that my brother goes a bit wild at Christmas. His favorite thing to do is book an entire movie theater for everyone he knows to see a movie of his choice.
This particular year was when The Last Jedi came out, and he is a Star Wars fanatic, so that was what we were going to see. Unfortunately, it would be at 6 on a Saturday, at least 2 hours before I would get off.
At this point, Jeff and Cait had been with us for 3 months without managing to find suitable replacements, and I made an arrangement with the other opening driver to switch shifts because his ended right when I would need to leave to make the movie.
I then cleared it with Jeff and he agreed to let me go at 5:30.
I was all set. Or so I thought.
You see, that Saturday we started busy. Very busy. So busy that at 5:30, when I went to hand Jeff my slips, he had already dispatched me out on a double delivery.
I took them but reminded him that I needed to leave when I got back. I just hoped the trailers were long enough that I didn’t miss much of the beginning of the movie.
I got back from my double and by that point, it was already 6 and the theater was 20 minutes away.
I had to leave. Once again I went to hand my slips to Jeff, but he got in my face.
‘You leave when I say you can leave,’ he told me.
‘You’re not going to let me?’ I asked, incredulous that he was reneging on our deal.
I came in early! I did my time!
He looked so very smug. ‘No.’
Well, I made a decision right then and there. There are so many pizza jobs out there that they needed me more than I needed them. I took my slip book, you know, the kind that you see in restaurants? I’ve found they’re great for delivery because not only can you store all of your slips in them, but they’re hard enough for customers to bear down on to sign.
Anyway, I slapped that in his hand and said, ‘Fine then. I quit.’
It was his turn to look incredulous. After making sure I meant it, he checked me out and I left the store fuming. I missed the entire opening of my movie.
But the story doesn’t end there. Oh no, you remember how I said Cait would confide in me?
She loved to tell me all about how often she and Jeff would meet at a hotel after work. She even horrified me by telling me Jeff would turn off the cameras so they could hook up in the back office when the store was empty.
Cait was, even so, obliging to give insignificant details like the date and time this happened.
So I put in an anonymous call to the franchise’s HR and told them what to look for when it came to checking the tapes. I told them everything Cait had told me.
But I still wasn’t content with leaving it there. So I went to my local pizza place, which just happened to be in Jeff’s wife’s area (remember when I said she was also an Area Manager) and I got to gossiping with the workers there while they made my pizza.
I was well aware it would make it back to her. Food employees can’t keep such juicy gossip to themselves.
Jeff got demoted to store manager, then transferred to the same store in his wife’s area I went to so she could keep an eye on him. I guess it didn’t work out because last I heard Jeff’s wife divorced him and he no longer worked for that franchise.
And none of that would have happened if he had just let me leave on time.”
39. Copy Our Work? I'll Make You Copy The Wrong Answers
“In high school, I had a kid who kept just weaseling into my group translation projects, and would just sit there, copy down our work without contributing at all, and then turn it in for the same grade we got for our hard work.
None of us could stand him on a personal level either, so it really bothered us.
Finally, I decided I was fed up and told the rest of my group that I was going to take the lead, so ignore what I said out loud and go off of what I wrote down on my paper.
I translated it all correctly on the paper, but what I said out loud was just close enough for a moocher to believe it was the right thing, but with more than enough grammatical and vocabulary errors that it was obviously C- or D-level work.
When we got those back and we all got A’s and he got a C-, he got really angry and asked the teacher why his was so bad when he copied directly off of us. That didn’t go very well for him, and he did his own darn work after that.”
38. Accuse Me Of Stealing? Doesn't Matter Cause I Quit
“I once found myself in a situation where I was forced to take a job at Blockbuster video. I had previously come from working in an independent store with lots of freedom, working with my closest friends, that eventually went out of business (go figure).
Anywho, my need for a salary outstripped my pride so I succumbed to the corporate machine that was Blockbuster video. Every day I put on that uniform, it stripped away a new layer of my soul. Regardless, I’m an amiable fella who tends to get along with everybody so the new folks I worked with became fast friends – save for management.
The managers there were the stereotypical management archetypes we all love to hate from every film we’ve ever seen. So, while being amicable, I just couldn’t really get along with these two people – the Assistant Manager in particular. That being said, I always did my job and did it well – I just didn’t let those two push me around.
In hindsight, I was likely out of line sometimes but there’s no fixing that today.
It’s probably worth noting at this point that before taking the job at Blockbuster I had also sent out my resume to an agency in the video game industry that I was woefully underqualified for.
I somehow got an interview there but nothing ever came of it.
Fast forward a few months. I’m working the mid-day shift at work on a Tuesday afternoon. This was at the height of the time where, if a new release wasn’t in, you could get a rain check to get it for free the next time around.
A couple had come in to rent a film that I thought was completely rented out when in actuality it wasn’t out yet (it was the ‘coming soon’ boxes that were out on the shelves). I apologized to the couple and scanned the appropriate barcode to credit them for the film on their next visit.
The whole while the Assistant Manager is watching this unfold.
When the couple leaves she explains the error that I had made and tells me that she is going to have to write me up for theft against the company. I’m obviously a bit upset by this as I’ve never stolen anything in my life.
I explained that I didn’t see it as theft but she won’t hear any of it and proceeded to write me up on a pink slip. Once she’s done she says I’ll have to sign the slip as an admission that I was aware that what I had done was wrong.
Needless to say, I refused to do it. There was no way I was going to label myself as a thief when I had made a simple mistake in which my manager could have intervened and stopped.
As we’re arguing over the slip the phone in the store rings.
The Assistant Manager picks up the phone and tells me it’s for me. The voice on the other end is unfamiliar to me but rings some bells in the back of my mind. It turns out it’s the man I had interviewed with months before for the job I was woefully underqualified for.
He explains that he had called my house (I was still living at home at the time) and my parents told him I was working. When he heard I was working at Blockbuster he decided I shouldn’t have to endure that for one more second (he was the best boss ever) so he asked for the local number there (he lived in Philly – I was in Canada) and called the store immediately to tell me I had the job if I wanted it.
Obviously, I said yes. I hang up the phone with a grin on my face. The Assistant Manager says that if I don’t sign the slip right away she’ll be forced to send me home without pay pending likely being fired.
I say that I have a better idea and take my stupid Blockbuster shirt off there on the spot and tell her that she can kindly go freak herself, leaving her there to work the rest of the shift by herself with her stupid pink slip dangling in her hand.
I went in a couple of years later to rent a movie. She was serving me at the counter. The only thing I said to her was, ‘So, still working at Blockbuster eh?’
I know that was a nasty thing to say but it was personally cathartic for me.”
37. If You're Going To Air Out Your Dirty Laundry, I Have A Right To Respond
“During my first year of college, I took a night class on public speaking where the professor was known to be difficult. She was a hardcore ‘feminist’: she would bring up and inject feminist issues into everything even when it wasn’t appropriate and put down some of the male students in the class for really no reason.
But the majority shut up because we wanted a good grade.
Every so often, she would talk about how she was married 4 times and had 3 ex-husbands and go on rants about how worthless they all were. Around the middle of the semester, we had a group project where my entire group basically skipped out on me and I went to the professor for help.
She basically told me to get out of her face and that I would have to do work meant for 5 people by myself or receive a failing grade.
The next night in class she went off on another rant about how her ex-husbands all suck, and I responded ‘Wow, can’t begin to understand why they all left you.’ Ended up dropping that class shortly afterwords and retaking it with a much better professor.”
36. Not Amused By Our Dancing? I'm Sure Your Husband Will Be
“I am a pretty good dancer. I dance the cha-cha, shag, swing, west coast swing – you know connected dancing as you see on Dancing with the Stars. I was dancing with Kelly, an often intoxicated blond, who was wearing an incredibly short leather skirt showing her awesome legs.
We were dancing at this incredibly crowded restaurant called Houck’s near Atlanta, GA.
The small dance floor was surrounded by tables. As we danced, there were a couple of chairs pushed back from the table. I pushed them back under the table to give us more room.
I saw this woman across the room giving me a look of absolute disgust. She marched over pulled both chairs out, sat in one, and put her legs on the other. She sat there glaring at me. Her 50 something husband soon joined her.
I could see that he had a keen interest in Kelly’s legs. I pulled Kelly round and slowly dipped her with her legs aimed right at him. He tilted his head down, clearly looking where he shouldn’t.
I looked over at his fuming wife, gave her a grin and wink. She smacked him in the head, grabbed her stuff, and walked out, hubby went running after her. I pushed the chairs back and continued dancing.
It was a night to remember.”
35. Force Me To Take A Class I Don't Want To Take? I Won't Put In Any Effort
“When I was a senior at school (and this is going on 35 years ago now), I got pretty good grades – there’s no real secret: I was bright, my parents made sure I worked my backside off and I was really lucky to get into a great school (it was an exam+interview to get in).
My parents weren’t well off so they made darned sure I worked at school because it was the best opportunity I was ever going to get.
So time passes, and I’m doing fairly well in school – top streams for everything, took Maths ‘O’ level a year early so I could take the ‘AO’ level when most people were doing ‘O’ – this was all set up for doing 6 ‘A’ levels in 6th form, so it was a big deal and most of the teachers knew who was doing it.
Mr. P took me for Spanish in one of those streams, and one day he asked me to stay behind. He started to sell me on taking another ‘O’ level at the same time I was taking Maths ‘AO’. I was interested, thinking it was Spanish (I liked Spanish) but no…
Mr. P was trying to establish another course for himself as an RE (Religious Education) teacher, and he was doing it by showing the headmaster (the principal) that he could take a small chosen group of people through a year’s instruction and get them to past the exam.
He’d been doing it apparently for a couple of years now, and every single student had got an ‘A’, or at least that’s what he claimed. He made a big deal about how the perfect record was really important to establishing RE as an exam course (rather than a couple of weekly free periods) at the school.
The thing is, even then I was not at all religious – Brown suits were the root cause, but the upshot was that I wasn’t even vaguely interested in studying for a year, learning stuff that I didn’t care about when I had real things to worry about like Thermodynamics and Stoichiometric equations…
I politely said ‘No thanks.’
He got insistent, I was ‘ideal’, I’d ‘regret it if I didn’t take the opportunity’, it would be ‘good for my grades’, etc., etc.
‘No thanks, I’m just not interested. I have to go now,’ – and left for my next class.
That night he phoned my parents. This was the unforgivable sin if you’ll pardon the pun, because my mother is religious and she jumped on it. Parents have a lot more leverage than teachers, or at least they did in my day.
Long story (ed: omit the screaming matches, the tantrums, the sulky silences, etc.) short, I ended up doing RE.
So every time I turned up for that darn class, taking away two (2!) precious ‘free periods’ every week, I resented what was happening more and more.
Eventually, it focused on a hard-as-diamond hatred of the subject and of Mr. P. All the time, I kept my head down, did the work, and smiled for the camera. My in-class grades were good.
Where is the malicious compliance, I hear you ask? Well, it was partly in the last paragraph, the sweet smiling on the outside, the boiling anger on the inside, but mainly when it came to exam time.
When my exam results came through, I had 7 ‘A’ grades, 3 ‘B’ grades, and one ‘F’. On that RE paper, I had written two things: my name, and in clear writing: ‘It doesn’t seem very Christian to force people to take tests.’ I left that face-up on the desk so Mr.
P (the main exam invigilator) could read it when he collected it, then got up and left, 5 minutes after the start. I made sure to smile at him on the way out of the hall – he couldn’t follow, of course…
He never spoke to me again. I didn’t take Spanish for A level (3xMaths, Physics, Chemistry, and GS) so I didn’t have to interact, and I always behaved as if nothing had happened if we passed in the corridor. I’m not 100% sure, but I don’t think he ever took another group of people through an accelerated RE course again.
My parents weren’t happy either – but I stuck with ‘you said I had to take the course and do the exam, and I did.’ They never said I had to try hard in the exam, they (like Mr. P) just assumed I would. They got over it a lot faster than Mr. P did.”
34. You Say You Want All Your Stuff Back? Here You Go
“So my last relationship was beyond bad, he was all sorts of terrible and controlling. At one point I had the strength to break up with him but then we got back together after we discussed some things. Stupid I know, but yeah love and all that.
Well, anyways one of the things we agreed on was that he and I would stop drinking because he was beyond crazy aggressive when he drank, and I wanted to support his sobriety. This is REALLY important.
Fast forward about eight months or so and we got into a huge fight and I not only broke up with him, I kicked him out of the house and told him he wasn’t ever allowed back inside.
We’d been living together for over a year at this point, so his mom got in touch with me about getting his stuff. While on the phone with her I could hear him in the background saying, ‘make sure they get everything I own or bought.
I want it all back.’ Apparently even stuff he gifted me he wanted back, but honestly, I didn’t care, I was happy to get rid of anything related to him. While cleaning our room up and gathering EVERYTHING I started to come across numerous bottles and cans of booze.
It seems he had been drinking again for a while and was hiding the evidence in the room. I mean he was hiding them under the bed, in his guitar case, rolled up in his clothes, in some old backpacks of mine, and so on and so forth.
He had said he wanted everything of his, so any bottle and the few unopened cans I found went straight into one of the garbage bags of his stuff. By the time I had gathered everything up, I had 3 bags of stuff and one was basically all just the booze.
Dropping them off was just so satisfying. He actually called moments after I left his parents’ place ranting about how petty and immature I was being. My response? ‘Well you wanted all of your stuff back, and those definitely weren’t mine.
Plus I figured you’d probably need a drink to deal with the breakup.’ I promptly ended the call and blocked him on everything. The most satisfying thing I’ve ever done.”
Another User Comments:
“Awesome!!!
I did something similar after a female roommate took off, leaving a lot of her belongings behind in her dumpster of a room.
Without going into the backstory, I had to pack up her stuff and leave it on the curb for her to pick up. It was gross – especially when I discovered used sanitary products in drawers, the closet, under the bed, etc.
I packed up every single one I found, and hope she enjoyed opening those boxes.” katmcflame
Another User Comments:
“Hopefully the bottles were all opened, too.
Booze-saturated clothes smell horrendous.
I had to kick out a tenant who let her little dog poop all over the house and she did nothing about it…
When I bagged up her belongings I made sure to include a few little puppy bombs for her to unwrap, mixed right in with her bedroom clothes.” Panda-feets
33. You Want My Girl? Ha, Good Luck With That
“Setting: New Years’ Eve 2003: A house party hosted by a group of jerks. I attended this party with a female friend and my high school crush. We were close to hooking up before but never did and I was convinced this was the night.
It turns out I had brought the ONLY girls to this party. So there were like 15 dudes and my 2 female friends.
So they were swamped with attention, etc, etc. Anyways one of the dudes who lives there starts putting the moves on my crush.
He had to have known I was working on this girl because she was leaning on my shoulder and we were flirting throughout the party. He then tries to take her somewhere to be alone, any chance he can get. Smoke break, giving her a tour of the house, whatever he can.
So the night is going on and I’m getting annoyed that this dude is trying to take my chick.
For petty revenge, I clog their toilet with fists full of toilet paper and I turn their AC down to 60 degrees. Most of them are pretty intoxicated at this point and are ill-prepared to deal with such things.
I start hearing his tool friends say things like ‘m-m-m-man… I’m soooo cold…’ and another one comes in saying… ‘the toilet is clogged…darn.’
My crush gets away from the dude finally. I had consumed enough booze at this point to have reached god-like confidence.
I took her by the hand and led her outside on the balcony. Then I give her the most romantic kiss I’ve ever given in my life. She goes with it 100%.
5 minutes later we are in full make-out mode. The jerk comes outside (he was obviously looking for her).
He starts talking nonsense like ‘Woah what the heck is going on here?’ Then I reply, ‘Don’t worry man, I got things under control.’ I can tell he’s getting angry.
He comes back later and tells me I have to leave. So I throw the girl over my shoulder and carry her out of the jerk’s house, all the while she is giggling. I get my other friend and we leave.
Moral of the story… that idiot actually indirectly helped me. My thirst for vengeance in combination with New Years’ booze gave me the confidence to sweep the girl off her feet.”
32. Pile On The Cleaning Tasks? I'll Make Sure You're Just As Annoyed
“So, yesterday, as I type this, I was put to task by my managers to do some extra cleaning. As I work in the restaurant business, things such as the walls or under counters or carts can get pretty nasty if they aren’t cleaned regularly.
Which is normally fine, but tonight, when I went in, I was on dishes and there was quite a bit sitting there and my manager made me do that cleaning first. I was also annoyed by some changes that happened with where to put dishes, but that’s not too important.
I was asked to scrub two carts and clean out a drain that was getting pretty gunky. Now, I don’t have a problem with it as I know it needs to be done, I’m just annoyed with the fact that I have to basically be in everyone’s way to clean the carts and the drain and the floors around the drain as some grease had been spilled on the floor and got under one of the counters.
So, while I did all that I was asked for and I made sure to get it clean, each time I got done with one cart, the floor, or the drain, I made sure to ask my manager to check it out.
Every. Single. Time.
By the end, my manager was groaning in annoyance, but I’m like ‘Hey, don’t make me do 90 minutes of extra cleaning when you know that I have a lot of dishes to clean tonight.’
I’d feel bad about it if I had been able to get a break before the night was over.”
31. Give Away My Car? I'll Leave A Fishy Surprise In The Passenger Seat
“When I was 15 I began working, and by the time I was 17 I had enough saved up to buy my first car. Me being young, when biological mom and stepdad said they were titling it in their name, for insurance and registration purposes, I didn’t question it.
Six months later, they’re divorcing.
When the divorce was finalized, my mom informs me that MY car, which I paid for, was going to my ex-stepdad in the divorce, since it showed as joint property between them.
I was furious. The car looked nice on the exterior, but burned through a quart of oil every two days, and drove like trash, but it was still my car.
The week before my ex-stepdad was due to pick it up, I quit putting oil in it. I drove around town extra that week, I was that smoke cloud in the town of burning oil.
To top off my revenge, my friend had a goldfish die.
It was a pretty big fish, 3-4 inches long. I asked for it.
The morning of the car being taken, July mind you, I cut the yellow foam beneath the passenger seat. The foam was sticky, abrasive, and resealed easily due to the stickiness.
I cut the foam, and stuffed the dead fish into the padding, and pushed it as far over as I could, then the foam stuck back together nicely.
He showed up with his partner (his partner was his side chick thus causing the divorce) and he made a big show of giving her MY car as a gift to her.
I just smiled.
I wish I knew how well the car went over, hours later, in the hot July weather, but I can imagine.”
Another User Comments:
“Wow… This reminds me of something I did when I was in my teens. There was this guy who worked for my dad’s business.
Drove a black truck and thought he looked tough. He and his friends would pick on me… This was before I took some martial arts classes. Anyway, we will call the guy Jeff.
One day, I was headed to our family pond to fish.
On the way there I had to walk past the business. Jeff and his friend were in his friend’s truck and as they drove past, tossed some drinks on me.
Fast forward. Caught a stringer full of fish, bluegill, and crappie, and realized on the walk back home that four of them were dead due to turtles eating on them when I was not looking.
Then I saw that Jeff’s truck was still parked there. With the Windows cracked down a bit. So, I took off the dead fish and put them through the windows.
This was summer in Oklahoma… I didn’t know he was staying with his friend for a few days.
4 dead fish in a hot truck. By the time he finally came back for the truck.. You could smell it from 50 feet. I heard there were maggots everywhere and he never drove the truck again. I was accused and he even called the police but they couldn’t do anything.
I have never told this story to anyone. This was 30 years ago.” Reddit User
30. Deceive Me? I'll Talk To The Dean About Your Naughty Rebound
“This happened when I was right out of high school with my first partner whom I was ‘in love’ with.
We had been together for our last year and a half or so of high school. We were each other’s firsts in many ways, and being young and naive I had thought I’d found the one and that it was going to go on forever.
The summer after we graduated was great and things were going well, but she received an athletic scholarship for soccer to a university about 3-4 hours away. Being the hopeless romantic I am, I thought, no big deal I can make this work.
We are in love after all. This was about 16 years ago now so FaceTime was not a thing, but we would talk on the phone whenever we could or maybe have a little AIM session. While in high school my partner would drink at parties like many teens do at that age.
I never tried drinking and actually haven’t to this day (I’m now 35), but once she went off to college, she really seemed to go into full party mode. I didn’t really care much, except for the fact that she had an athletic scholarship that could be revoked if she was caught.
Also, due to the season starting in the fall she went off to school early so the campus wasn’t fully occupied so I thought again it seemed a bit risky. I was assured that all of the coaches and RA’s were ‘cool with it.’
Well, being the younger and much more insecure guy that I was at the time, I started to get nervous when I found out the men’s and women’s soccer teams were both there.
Slowly over the first couple of weeks, she was away, and calls would get sent to voice mail or if they were answered she would be with ‘friends.’ This was wreaking havoc on my teenage brain and heart. So in my mind, my idea of being a hopeless romantic was to make the drive unannounced and surprise her at school.
This was before the days of smartphones and GPS units, and I didn’t have her dorm number or anything so I jumped on Mapquest and printed directions to the university and figured I would call her when I got there, and voila, problem solved.
So I hopped in my car with a CD I had burned for her the night before and made the 4-hour drive to a city I’d never been to. Upon arriving there I called her and received no answer. Maybe she was at practice since it was still earlier in the day, so I decided to drive through the campus to get an idea of where things were.
I’m cruising through the campus and nearly hit this guy who ran out in front of me, we both fully saw it happening in slow motion but luckily avoided any incident. It was like that scene in Pulp Fiction where Marcellus walks in front of Butch’s car and they lock eyes, except I didn’t run him down.
After that little shakeup, I decided to shoot her another call and this time she picked up. The practice had finished and they went to Dairy Queen after. I ended up asking which dorm she was in, in case I wanted to send her a letter in the mail…smooth I thought.
So I drove to a store near the campus and grabbed a card, some flowers, and her favorite candy (somehow I still remember they were Crispy M&M’s). I ended up heading to her dorm with my gifts in tow. Knocked on her door and said ‘Suprise!’ Only she didn’t look happy surprised to see me.
She looked uncomfortably surprised to see me. That’s when I noticed another person in her dorm, and lo and behold it was the guy I’d almost hit with my car. I didn’t know what to do so I just said, ‘oh okay…this was for you,’ and handed her the stuff I’d brought.
I sulked back to my car feeling like a total dummy for wasting my time and emotions on this girl only to have her and some guy play me. On the way home, she called to try to explain that they had started seeing each other and that he was an upperclassman and also one of the coaches.
That’s when it clicked, she had mentioned this guy before and coincidentally he would always be around when she was with ‘friends.’ I also remembered he was one of the cooler upperclassman Men’s RAs who was also old enough to buy drinks for everyone.
I told her I was done and I didn’t want to speak to her again.
The whole drive home I was trying to come up with a way to get back at them for breaking my heart, and by the time I got home I’d come up with my plan.
Her mother was a doctor and this was the early 2000’s where you could use a free email service and get a doctors.com address. I set one up under her mother’s name. I also knew this guy’s first name and that he was a soccer coach/player on the team.
He was an upperclassman so I searched for the university’s roster from past seasons and games and this being a smaller town there weren’t many guys with the same first name and I was able to get his full name. Finally, I emailed the dean, and CC’d the athletics director(s) listed on the university site from my new doctors.com email as a ‘concerned mother.’ I was concerned about a coach/RA having a relationship with a freshman female player, and also for a coach/RA to be supplying underage teenagers with adult beverages on school property.
My now ex-partner ended up calling me a few weeks later to tell me she was sorry. We chatted for a few minutes and she mentioned that she and her new partner were in some trouble with the school and he ended up being kicked off the team as well as being kicked out of the school due to some parental complaints.
Turns out he was actually supplying a ton of kids booze and stuff and allowing parties on his dorm floor. She was put on some type of academic probation and almost lost her scholarship. As I said, this may be beyond petty, but at the time it felt justified and he was technically breaking rules (and hearts in my case). I wonder whatever happened to that guy.”
29. Too Preoccupied With Being Mad At Me? You'll End Up In Trouble
“Was in a drive-thru one day, and felt my car moving in subtle ways. Turned out that I pulled up a tiny bit too far and made contact with the car ahead of me. It was such a gentle contact that neither of us felt the tap itself, but if an occupant in either vehicle moved enough, it would transfer a little bit of the movement via the bumper to the other one.
After a minute or so the other occupants must have noticed the odd movements too, because the passenger, a teenage girl, got out and started yelling at me about it.
Given how completely banal the ‘fender bender’ was, I just ignored her and she got back in the car.
A few minutes later, I pull up to a red light in the left lane, and who do you think is there in the right lane next to me? You guessed it. Now, both the passenger and the driver (also a teen girl) started flipping me the bird and yelling at me.
Then the light turned green and we moved forward.
About 200 yards up the road, they were still at it when the guy in front of them put on his blinker and slowed to turn into a side street. The girls were so preoccupied with their rage that they failed to notice this and rear-ended the poor guy.”
28. Keep Me Awake? I Hope My Midnight Snack Doesn't Bother You
“I was a sophomore in college and my new roommate in the dorm room (which was about as big as a walk-in closet) would keep me up all night with her light on and typing on her computer. Our beds were lofts and right next to each other.
I finally couldn’t take it anymore (this was after she gave me a list of ‘house rules’ detailing that I had to be home by 9 pm and couldn’t have guys over – ever – and couldn’t have people over past 9:30 pm.
I put in for a transfer, but my last night as her roommate (she had a test the next day too), I sat up all night with a big bag of mini Milky Ways. I spaced it out so that every 5-10 minutes (every time she might have dozed off), I would slowly open a piece of candy, making as much crinkly noise as I could, and it would jolt her awake each time if she wasn’t awake already. Kept her up until about 4 am, which is when I went to sleep.”
27. Hide All My Belongings? Here's More Clutter For You To Tidy Up
“I can never let things lie. Most of my life is comprised of petty revenge. To the point of punching inanimate objects if, say, I trip over them. Rubber-band AI has infuriated me into breaking more than one Mario Kart game disc/cartridge in my life.
I think the person who has, over the years, felt my ire the most, would be my mother, though. See, she’d deny it to her grave, but she’s a neat freak. But only when it comes to things that aren’t hers.
Magazines, spare pairs of reading glasses, notebooks, boxes of tissues – all these things are apparently just fine to leave out on tables or the mantelpiece or even on my chair. But my Gameboy/s, or books I was reading, or sketchpads? Oh heck no.
Those have to be hidden like it’s Easter and I’m an excitable 5-year-old kid again. Most of the time not even in the room I would have cause to reasonably use the item in question. Sketchbooks? In the kitchen, obviously. Console controllers/remotes? Why, in my bedroom, even though the consoles are in the living room! Duh! Pencils? Well, the most obvious place for those to go would be in the jewelry box in her room!
None of my attempts to negotiate this ever produced any meaningful result.
My things still went missing irritatingly often.
So my anger took on two forms, chosen by my characteristic sense of whimsy. Since she loved tidying my stuff so much, I figured the least I could do would be to give her more opportunities to do so.
So every time I had to root through drawers or cupboards for my stuff, I’d leave whatever I displaced while looking wherever it may have fallen.
The second would be taking something of hers and ‘tidying’ it into a totally obscure place.
On top of cabinets in the kitchen she could never hope to reach, or in the garage, things like that. When pressed, I’d smile innocently and say that ‘the clutter around here was just bugging me, so I put your (item) (wherever I’d hidden it). I’d have thought you’d look there, it’s the most LOGICAL place for it!’
The Tidy Cold War has raged for years now and shows no signs of stopping.”
26. Won't Fix My Internet? I'll Spam Your Ticketing System
“This happened around 2012. Back then I used to live in Southern Europe (one of the Mediterranean countries). I was a university student in a remote, rural place.
I had just moved to a new apartment and, naturally, my first order of business was to make sure that I had a running Internet connection.
The problem was that, due to the place I was living in being so remote, there was only one ISP provider available. You didn’t like the provider? Too bad.
Anyway, I sign the necessary paperwork in time, move to the new place, set up the router and all, and thankfully my connection is fine.
That is until day 3 or 4 when out of nowhere my Internet connection dies (but my phone line was working normally).
Ok, no probs, I call the ISP to open a ticket. The representative tells me that they will get back to me soon.
A few days pass by and I get nothing so I decide to call them again. The representative tells me that they are still investigating the problem and that they will get back to me soon.
Now, this is the point where I’m starting to get frustrated.
I know that the Internet in the area is fine, in fact, my next-door neighbor’s Internet connection is great so the problem must be something that is easily fixable, right? WRONG.
A week has passed by and I call them again. This time the representative tells me that they have investigated the issue and the problem is officially of ‘unknown origin’ which means that they cannot give me an ETA for the fix.
I hang up the phone feeling sad and perplexed. As I contemplate my internetless existence the representative’s words echo in my mind: ‘unknown origin’, ‘we cannot give you an ETA’.
Slowly, my sadness transforms into denial. How is this possible? My phone connection still works so the line is still there and I know for a fact that everyone in the area has a stable Internet connection.
This must be a simple bug that is easily fixable. This can only mean one thing: Some idiot has not been doing his job correctly.
The denial becomes anger. How dare they tell me that they cannot give me an ETA? This should be illegal! What if my job depends on my Internet connection? Not to mention that Internet access is a basic human right! They are denying me my rights by not giving me an ETA! At this point the issue stops being the Internet connection – it’s about the principle of the matter.
As a human being and a customer, I am entitled to an ETA!
I call the ISP again and I try to explain my flawless reasoning. No luck. The poor representative who listens to my rant tells me that the only thing I can do is to open a new ticket.
Shocked by my inability to define my fate I accept his offer and hang up.
And then… A magnificent idea is born. Since the only thing that I can do is to open a new ticket then this is exactly what I’m going to do.
From that point on I was calling my ISP provider two to five times per day. Each time, I was telling the representative the same thing: ‘This is what has happened, I know that there are multiple tickets with my name on them already but I want you to open a new one!’ Most of the representatives were pretty amused by my story.
Everyone complied.
A month later – yes, a month passed without the issue having been fixed – I get a call from the regional tech executive of the ISP. The call goes like this:
Executive: You must stop opening tickets, you’re flooding our ticketing system!
At first, I was shocked at how aggressive the executive was, he was clearly one step away from starting to calling me names and I knew that the only reason this didn’t happen was that these calls are being recorded.
And then my shock transformed into a visible glorious erection. You see, my friends, this is the point when I realized that I was winning.
Me: Well, are you going to give me an ETA for a fix?
Executive: We cannot give you an ETA, the problem is of an unknown origin.
Me: Then I guess I’ll keep opening tickets.
Executive: hangs up.
To cut a long story short, this exchange renewed my passion for crushing the souls of those who have wronged me so I kept opening tickets at the same pace for another 30-40 days.
I estimate that in the course of the total ~70 days that this lasted I must have opened more than 250 tickets. One day my phone rings. I pick it up and it’s an ISP representative who tells me this:
‘Mr. u/LexMeat is this you? Your problem has been solved, everyone at [ISP name] is talking about you!’
Indeed, on that day my Internet connection was back.
The cool part about this, however, was that I had Internet all along. Remember my next-door neighbor? She was kind enough to let me know her WiFi password since day 1.”
Another User Comments:
“That’s a lot of patience on your part. My internet wasn’t working properly for like 2 days and they can’t tell me what’s wrong and no idea when someone will visit me (turns out the fiber cable was broken due to a previous accident in the area).
So I asked everyone in a group (where I’m pretty popular) to flood their social media accounts with the words ‘why is u/justanoobdev69’s internet not working?’ I got a call later that day telling me my ticket was expedite and someone will surely visit tomorrow and telling me to stop sending my ‘trolls’ to them LMAO.” [deleted]
25. Refuse To Pay Rent? I'll Steal your Work Badge
“I lived with a roommate who had her first ‘real’ job. She had a fancy badge she had to wear to work every day. Well, not two weeks into the job she lost the badge and spent a whole weekend freaking out about finding it.
She didn’t and had to go in early on Monday and pay for a new one.
Well, she owed me a significant amount of coin from the time she was between jobs. I was the leaseholder in a 4 bedroom apartment. After payday, roomie was flaunting her wealth, so I reminded her of the back bills she owed.
She told me, ‘I paid you back, I put it all in that cupboard’… in the kitchen, we had a little basket that was to pay back for groceries and pizza and stuff. If we ordered pizza then everyone who ate would throw in like $5 and next time there would be enough to order pizza again.
It was for incidental expenses, not a month’s worth of bills. The dough wasn’t there, and her story kept changing. I knew she was lying because she was claiming that she paid me back BEFORE she got paid from her new job.
But when confronted she would scream ‘You should have checked the cupboard!’ and refused to discuss it anymore.
So, after a few days of not being able to resolve the situation I told her she needed to move out by the end of the week. Then I took her fancy little work badge and put it in the cupboard, where she never looked for it, and she had to get another replacement. Diabolical.”
24. Flip Our Power Off? Don't Be Surprised When We Do The Same
“This is one of my favorite stories to tell. So, when I was a sophomore in college, my roommate bought a lockpick set to mess around with. After a few hours of practice, we found out that it is extremely easy to pick low-quality padlocks (like, 1 second to pick) and even the ~$20 master locks can become pretty easy (maybe 3 seconds) with a few minutes of learning the particular lock.
A year later, we were in a different dorm with a bunch of freshmen. The electrical box on his wing didn’t have a lock on it, so the jerks would get wasted or bored or whatever and flip everyone’s power off just to be punks.
One day, we were looking at something on his desktop when the power goes out. We lookout, and sure enough, the jerks are being jerks.
We plot our revenge: 4 am the next morning, we go to the other wing (where most of the punks’ rooms are), pick the lock using our previous experience, discretely shut off the power, and slap on the master lock we had practiced with a year earlier. The maintenance guy wasn’t able to cut off our lock till around 3 pm the next day. Boom. Not sure if anyone missed a midterm, but I still like to think so.”
23. Break My Trust? I'll Annoy You And Your New Man
“My close friend and roommate – at the time, we barely speak anymore – once forced me to tell the guy I was ridiculously interested in that I liked him, and then proceeded to date him a week after she pressured me into doing it.
I was close friends with both of them, and I kept thinking that there was something between them, but they denied it. They kept denying it until a week after I had already told him and was dealing with some serious heartbreak issues.
I confronted my friend/roommate if there was something going on with them and she was like ‘welllllll…’ and so I lost all trust in her. Right after I told them both I needed space, the ‘heating broke in his apartment’ so he had to stay over at our place (because that’s obviously the only logical thing to do??) for a week.
A WEEK. I wasn’t impressed.
So one day, I get back from class and the front door is locked, which only happens if no one is home. I open the door to see the guy’s shoes there, but it’s super silent. Eerily silent.
My mind rushes to the conclusion that they were trying to get it on. Even if they weren’t, I just wanted to be a huge jerk because I was tired of their nonsense. So, pretending like I didn’t think anyone was home, I grabbed another roommate’s speakers that are REALLY loud, plugged my iPod in, pushed the speakers against the wall (since the walls are paper thin)…
…and played the Star Wars theme on the highest volume. On repeat.
Ten minutes later they left quietly to go to his place.”
22. Be A Reckless Driver? I'll Make Sure My Dog Pees On Your Lawn
“There is a guy down the street from me who has nearly hit me with his car numerous times while I’ve been out for a run (several times speeding, running stop signs, and often backing up without looking). Then he has the nerve to glare at me after the fact and occasionally lay on his horn.
He takes a lot of pride in his lawn (always has sprinklers on, out maintaining it), so I have trained my dog to pee on it during our early morning walks. My dog’s pee will kill any grass within a day (must be really concentrated). Now he has all these yellow spots of dead grass on his lawn, and I sleep satisfied.”
21. Bad At Teaching Math? Here's A Book To Teach You How
“Partway through a personal tale of woe I call ‘bad math teachers I had in grade school’, I had one math teacher in particular who was insane along with being horrible at teaching math – or teaching anything else for that matter.
At first, I couldn’t believe the stories of insanity I was hearing from other classes… until I and my classmates witnessed it ourselves. I’m talking temper-tantrums, yelling, stomping feet. From an adult on the job to students who are a mandated captive audience for 45 minutes every day with this person.
At the end of the year, I visit a favorite used book store. I find a book from the 1950s titled something along the lines of ‘how to teach math to middle schoolers’ or ‘how to teach math to the 9th grade.’ I buy it.
On the very last day of school, in the chaos of the morning’s student-arrival with crowded halls and busses and busy parents driving around and teachers arriving, I commando myself into the school office… find the teacher’s mailbox (which were publically accessible to everyone)…
push the book in… and leave. Five feet out of the office door, I spy the teacher in question walk into the office presumably to check her mailbox.
I dash upstairs to my homeroom. I let my friends in on what I just did.
I ask the particular friend who had that teacher for homeroom to go check and come back. The friend reported back that the teacher appeared to have been in tears.
No regrets.
Years later, after hearing that this particular teacher had left that school 1 year after my time under her deranged mal-instruction, I passed by her and her two kids in a local mall. She was still as insane, frazzled, and deranged as ever before.
And I still had no regrets.”
20. Bully Me? I'll Tell Everyone You Have Head Lice
“When I was in grade school, I was the nerdy teacher’s pet with glasses. Needless to say, I was ruthlessly picked on by the elite female clique in my grade, which happened to be run by a girl named Sarah. One day, I snapped.
I took a pen to the bathroom with me and slowly etched a message into the bulky metal toilet paper dispenser. ‘Sarah Ashby has head lice.’ She dropped immediately to pariah status and lived there for a solid week. Looking back now, it is mildly disturbing how much satisfaction I gleaned from it at the time.”
19. Steal My Rent? I'll Key Your Car
“The person who I thought was my best friend stole my funds for rent which was actually paid for by my dad. Stealing from me, even when I’d paid for thousands of dollars worth of meals and concerts because I wanted him to be included, would not be as big of a deal as stealing from my family.
Then, he wouldn’t even actually admit it but said he would pay my dad back somehow thanks to my dad being understanding and choosing not to go to the police or anyone about it.
So we still gave him the chance to work and pay it back, then found him lying about going to work, and was instead smoking stuff at our friend’s house.
He would leave the house in his shirt and work badge and just go there and smoke. He’d been fired after the first week and went with this second lie for about a month.
Finally, one night I punched him and keyed his car with ‘Flip you.'”
18. Rude Customer Gets A Small Drink Instead Of A Large
“It was Superbowl Sunday, everyone was out watching the game leaving our restaurant nearly empty. We had the occasional customer rolling through allowing us to have some conversations while we wait for their food. My task was taking orders over the headset with my friends also listening in on my lane.
One of them (I’ll call him Jim) was listening because he was training to use the headset so I was listening in on him then we switched tasks; the other (call him Joe) was listening in because – well I don’t know why Joe was listening.
Anyways, I hear a beep.
Me: Welcome to McDonald’s, what can I get for you?
So our headset system is really old and sometimes people’s orders come across completely unintelligible.
Customer: I’ll hfeve a lrgaw coene.
Me: I’m sorry, could you repeat that?
Customer: I’LL HFEVE A LRGAW COENE.
The customer reiterated angrily.
Me: A large cone? I’m sorry but we only have one size of the cone.
I rang up a cone. Suddenly, much more clear, the customer yelled across the speaker
Customer: NO A LARGE SODA! GOD, YOU’RE STUPID!
Me: I’m sorry, sometimes these headsets are really bad.
Customer: Yeah, yeah, whatever.
The customer drove to the next window.
My brain racing, I knew I had to get some kind of revenge so without fully constructing my plan, I rushed to the window that accepts payment and changed the order to a small soda.
I said to the cashier:
Me: That’s a large soda.
Cashier: No? That’s a small soda.
Me: Trust me, that’s a large soda, don’t give the customer the receipt.
Eventually, he realized some sort of vengeance was underway and took her order as if it was a large soda.
I quickly run back to my station where the machine made the small soda. Still thinking on my feet I empty it into a large cup then lid it. Joe points out that this is a stupid plan as the customer will instantly know something’s up.
I then get the best idea of my life and fill the rest of the cup with ice.
Joe and I are dying of laughter and can’t risk tipping off the customer so I hand the drink to Jim who was impressively able to contain himself.
I watched the customer take a sip and my stomach sank; I thought I had been found out… Then she left with her ‘large’ soda and that same nasty expression.
The icing on the cake: I told my manager and she gave me a fist bump.”
Another User Comments:
“I’m so glad I read this one.
Isn’t it great working fast food when you can so easily pull one over and get away with it? The people are so eager to drive off that they don’t notice and by the time they do, they aren’t coming back.
Not much we can do if you call us and scream.
When I worked at Dunkin Donuts if a customer was rude and ordered anything from the espresso machine I’d not only give them decaf espresso, but I would also steam water instead of milk and add that to their drink.
Then I’d add just the smallest amount of steamed milk and foam to hide it.
Or I’d make sure to rip their tortilla on their Wake-up Wraps. Flipped frosted donuts over so the frosting stuck to the bottom of the back. Or, if they ordered Munchkins, I’d count out the amount instead of just filling the boxes regardless of whether it was twenty or fifty. ‘Looks a little light? Well, sure I’ll count them. Looky there, exactly twenty, have a good one.'” [deleted]
17. Bully Me? I'll Get You In Trouble With The Gym Teacher
“My senior year of HS I had gym class with a bunch of wrestlers/football players/people who like to give you problems. We were playing volleyball and the class was set up so that we had 5 teams and 2 games going at once i.e: one team had to sit out.
Well, my team was playing and something stupid happened, can’t remember what, so I gave the ball a little kickback over to the other side. Harmless. Well, one of the 2 teachers sees it, yells no kicking the ball, and has me start running laps.
One of the football players sitting out that game says something to me while running laps along the lines of ‘haha, loser soccer player.’
On the next lap while running by him, I trip myself and land so my elbow hits the ground and makes that huge echoing boom.
I get up and start cussing him out about tripping me and yadda yadda, cool gym teacher (who was also the football coach) ends class immediately thinking there’s gonna be a fight and starts yelling at the kid about how much trouble he could get in and not being able to play in the next game and stuff like that.
When we were done dressing out the kid is running laps (he had to until he was tardy for his next class) and then he had to find out what class I was in the next hour and give an apology in front of everyone so that he wouldn’t get written up. One of my best memories I have of high school. . . .”
16. Never Underestimate the Power Of Mini Cars
“I drive a MINI Cooper (already I think you know where this is headed), and I know how to drive it (read: aggressive, but safe). Generally, I go with the flow of traffic, if I’m in the fast lane, I’ll be going 80 mph and letting faster cars pass if I see them coming up on my tail quickly.
Basically, I’m never driving in a way that you should feel the need to tailgate me.
Occasionally on surface streets, people follow scary close to my tail. Goodness knows why. Maybe they’re playing a game of ‘catch the tiny car.’ But when people tailgate me aggressively, I take 90 degree turns at 35 mph+ without braking.
My car can take it with a bit of tire squealing. Their car… not so much. I’ve seen some very satisfying fishtailing happening in my rearview mirror from SUVs and trucks that could not corner so suddenly.
There’s just something about idiot tailgaters…
they think that by watching your brake lights, they can match your speed and follow you regardless of the make and model you drive. The joke’s on them. I can turn without slowing down if I really want to. MINI Coopers rock.”
Another User Comments:
“This reminded me of someone back in college.
No one liked riding in this guy’s car. Either I or someone else would be asked to drive, but not him. One day I found out why. I was forced to ride shotgun. This guy rode close to everyone’s tails. Scared the life out of me so I asked him bluntly why he was tailgating all the time.
He didn’t realize he was. He wasn’t trying to pass anyone. He just followed less than a car length behind everyone out of habit.
Apparently, driving that closely behind people was putting him in a comfort zone. He was clearly fixated by the back bumpers of other cars.
He would miss some turns and have to turn around to correct his route because he was just concentrating on following the car in front of him.
He couldn’t carry on a conversation while he was driving. He just couldn’t walk and chew gum at the same time because he was mesmerized by that rear bumper I guess.” ikirod
15. Won't Pay Me What I Deserve? I'll Get Your Business Shut Down
“I started a new job as a vet tech in July. Busted my butt, worked overtime, did all the work no one wanted to do, and worked for way less than I should have. My boss actually had told me that after my first initial 2 weeks, I was to go from training pay (minimum wage) to about $3 more an hour.
The job was far and sometimes she would just schedule me for 2 hours’ worth of work… Bad situation but some income was better than none and I was extremely broke. I also got discounted vet care for my cat, and ALWAYS paid in full.
When paychecks arrived she kept ‘accidentally’ messing mine up and paying me minimum wage. When I sat her down quickly to talk to her about it (this was a couple of paychecks later), She had decided that she wanted to give me a ‘vacation’ and that she wanted to ‘try out this new employee for 2 weeks and decide who she liked better.’ She reassured me that it would be me and that she would call me soon about my schedule.
I was concerned, but what could I do???
So she goes back to appointments because we are slammed as usual. The receptionist comes up to me later, after me being at work a couple of hours, and asks for my key to the front door so she can ‘make a copy.’ And a little while later, when there is downtime, I ask to speak to my boss again regarding pay.
She offers me a percentage off the books, which is significantly less than what I should have received. I take it and leave shortly later. 2 weeks later I call for my schedule and my boss refuses to talk to me.
Every excuse in the book. This goes on for weeks. She still owes me.
I reported her to the Better Biz Bureau and they wouldn’t do anything. So I called the department of labor. They investigate and come to find that she owes me tons.
She pays them and then proceeds to send me back-date bills that I previously paid in full. Butttttt guess what? Most of the stuff she does to save coin at her job is illegal. And health jeopardizing. So I called the state on her. She doesn’t know yet, but I’m pretty sure they will shut her down.”
14. Invade My Privacy? I'll Make You Believe You Won The Lottery
“I work for a construction company and we do remodeling on homes. We have a rule here that we get to keep anything we find hidden behind the walls. We hired this guy (we really needed a worker badly) who was a total jerk from day one.
I’ve been working for this company for 5 years and this guy has only been doing construction for 1 year after he got fired from his accounting job for getting a DUI.
Anyways, he would always make fun of my clothes and my accent and one day he went too far by telling my boss about my private Instagram account pics.
He got on my phone and looked through my Instagram page and showed my boss pictures of me smoking stuff.
Little did he know that my boss has been my friend for 8 years and we used to smoke together before we both quit.
I was so mad that he violated my privacy that I made a plan to screw him over. He was the kind of guy who would always come in late and complain that trains or traffic is why he was always late.
One day I overheard him saying that if he won the lottery he would quit this job for not getting the “respect” he deserves. (You have to earn your respect here.) One day I bought some fake gold coins online and I put them in a metal box I found at the antique store and waited for a chance to hide it in a wall.
Luckily I did not have to wait long. The day he found the coins it seemed like it was his best day ever. The first thing he did when he opened the box.. he called my boss a loser and he quit immediately on the spot.
He said, forget this place..I’m rich’… Lol.. little did he know that was the best day of my life. After he quit my boss told us that he was going to fire him anyways for always showing up late…I wish I could see the look on his face when he finds out the gold coins are fake.
Best $40 I spent in my life.
Another User Comments:
“Apparently at my firm, there was this guy who quit who seems a lot like the dude you’re describing. Full of himself thinks he’s the greatest and doesn’t know what an ethernet port was so to speak.
A client of ours actually recommended him and since the team needed an extra hand they took him. One night he decided to upgrade the OS and some other systems for the company that recommended him and messed it up, didn’t back up, nothing, just proceeded like an idiot.
The team spent all of the next day trying to sort the stuff out while the woman there who did the recommendation was shouting she never wants him near their stuff again… like.. girl you said we should hire him! But anyway, yeah, he left thinking he can open his own firm and he did, was open 1 month, tried to poach clients from us, failed miserably then just quit his own company.” Chipnstein
13. Play Me For A Fool? I'll String You Along
“I was seeing a girl in high school and we were together for two years. We broke up when I was 19. It was definitely necessary, we definitely weren’t meant for each other. But she started seeing another guy 2 days after we broke up.
Sent me into a spiral of hardcore, unequivocal depression. Drank every night, convinced myself I was hideous, no girl would ever want me, etc…
Then there was a 2 year period where she had broken up with him and texted me every week, once every 7 days.
She’d either hit me up on FB, AIM, call/text me, or e-mail my mom. 2 years, once a week I’d hear from her. Never said a word back.
After a while, I realized I was wrong about my own impressions of myself.
We started hanging out again (being intimate), and I ended up bringing her to a close friends’ wedding. She reciprocated this act by going home with the best man.
It crushed me. Drank myself silly for a couple of days. Decided I was going to enact revenge, though it wasn’t exactly justified.
You see, at this time, I’d become very well-liked in the college town I lived in. I might have been the most well-known and well-liked person in the area. And now I could mess with her. So I did.
I waited until she broke up with the ‘best man.’ I saw it on social media.
Then I added her. Now, I was her ‘first love’, and I knew her very, very well.
I added her a couple of weeks later. I was talking to a close friend about my plan the whole time. I told him ‘she’s going to ask me why I decided to add her on FB via text message.’ She did.
Then I proceeded to play her harder with my FB status updates. At one point I said, ‘Check this out, she loves pop music, I’m going to post these Wiz Khalifa lyrics, and trust me, she’ll post the rest of the lyrics within an hour.’ Within 10 minutes she had posted ‘Whenever you call baby I’ll roll up.’
So now I had her.
I knew what I was doing. I strung her along for a couple of months, before inviting her to a party. I predicted everything to my close friend. I knew what she would say a week before she would say it, I was ruthless.
So we’re about to have this huuuuge party, and I know if I talk to her she’s going to come up. So I do. She shows up just like everyone in my town did, it was huge. I looked like I was the man, anyone who was anyone in that town was there.
We went to the bars (as planned) rolling 30-40 people deep. At the peak of the night, where she was sure we were going to hook up, my girl at the time got off work and came to the bar. She walked in, I kissed her, and then walked up to my ex and said: ‘Oh by the way tonight was fun, but I just want you to know we’re just friends, I don’t plan to take it any further than that.’
Almost a year of planning went into one 2-minute moment, and I’d like to say I’m ashamed of what I did, but wow did it feel good. She now hits me up about every week, and I don’t respond.
I’m a jerk.”
12. I Shoveled All The Snow Onto My Bad Neighbor's Lawn
“I couldn’t help my mom with shoveling the snow one day because I was ill. Unfortunately, my nice neighbor couldn’t help either because he cut open his hand. The nice neighbors are like family to us.
For my mom needing a knee replacement, she can work harder than some men (I used to help her with janitorial work), but it sucked to watch her work hard alone.
We have another neighbor who is kind of a jerk. The mean neighbor sat inside and didn’t even help, she also didn’t even help when we got like 2-3 feet of snow.
After finally feeling better today, I went to shovel out front.
I did ours and my nice neighbor’s pathway and doorstep and I looked at my mean neighbor’s door and hatched an idea. Cue petty revenge. I made sure that the mean neighbor was gone then proceeded to put all the snow I shoveled in front of her door, but I didn’t stop there.
I had also helped another neighbor rake his leaves in the fall, so I shoveled him a parking space and shoveled in front of his door then put that snow in front of her door as well. We also had to take mean neighbor’s trashcan out when it was time to put the cans by the curb (I also shoveled a spot for our cans to go when we have to take them out.
Guess where that snow went.) You’d think she would give me at least a ‘Thank you,’ but no. So I also snowed in her can while I was at it while also clearing a path for ours and Nice neighbor’s trashcans and recycling bins.
In the end, I looked back on my work. The snow was as high as her doorknob. I was snickering, chuckling, and laughing to myself as I was doing it like the little fool I am.
When I went out back, I saw my Nice neighbor’s sister and her partner, and my mom.
My mom already knew I was up to no good and she thought I made a ‘naughty’ snowman. When I told her what I had done she laughed her butt off and so did the neighbors. If I had planned this before heading out, I would have taken some water to freeze the snow to make it twice as worse.
We decided to text our Nice neighbor’s wife and she could not stop laughing. I am usually a pretty chill and non-confrontational guy but when someone messes with my family, I am willing to do anything to get back at them.
Sometimes, you just got to give people the cold shoulder and serve them revenge. Revenge is best. served. cold.”
Another User Comments:
“My divorce was final in oct 95 and my ex made my life a living nightmare. It snowed in dec around 17 inches and I was out plowing my family and friends out.
Around 12 am I drove by the house I had to give to my ex and saw no one had plowed it. SO being the nice guy I plow it for her.
Sat across the street the next day to watch my ex spend 3 hours digging out her car. She always said I could never do anything right!” Rathar3
11. Attention-Seeker? I'll Get Everyone To Ignore You
“Sarah was an interesting friend. She loved attention but she would try to get attention in the worse ways. Sarah likes to troll people but her trolls are more harsh than funny.
For example, one day I was hanging out with my partner and I was going to go to my best friend’s place to have a girls’ night with her, Sarah, and a few other friends.
Sarah was on her way over to my best friend’s place. My best friend’s roommates needed more booze so I offered to go really fast since the store is up the street and I haven’t had anything to drink. As I was gone, she told my friends on social media that something happened and I am missing.
So she told everyone to call me until I pick up. While I was at the store, my partner calls me saying that I should call Sarah because she is at my best friend’s apartment freaking out thinking I am missing.
I give her a call and I ask her what’s up. She said, ‘Nothing! I am chilling with the roommates just waiting for you.’ I was so upset that she freaked out a handful of my friends, practically giving my partner a panic attack since I was just with him a half-hour before that, and when I saw her she thought it was so funny.
It’s not funny to tell people that someone that they care about is missing. My partner was angry at what she did so we got her back.
Since Sarah loves attention, at a party I got EVERYONE to ignore her for 15min.
She wondered around trying to talk to people. Then, she started freaking out saying, ‘What the heck is going on!’ She disappeared into my friend’s room. My friend tried going in there but Sarah was telling her to get the heck out.
Sarah ended up telling us she is on anxiety medication. For those 15 minutes, she said it felt like an hour. She said nothing felt real. I don’t really believe her story since she was okay enough to tell my friend to get out of her own room. I do feel like this was the meanest for making her freak out to that extreme. We all got over it though and we are still cool.”
10. Try To Make Me Jealous? I Don't Think Your Partner Will Like That
“A few years ago, an ex took a picture of her and her new partner sleeping together and sent it to me in an obvious attempt to torment me (the text included with the image said ‘I don’t miss you’). I didn’t really get it, seeing as I was the one who ended the relationship.
On a lark, I assumed she didn’t tell her partner that she sent the picture. Shot in the dark I guess, but after some simple detective work (I asked a mutual friend), I got the partner’s phone number and forwarded it to his phone with the text, ‘Did you know that (ex’s name) sent this to me? – her ex, (my name).’
Now, while I can’t confirm many of the details surrounding the incident, the partner was so mad with her that he kicked her out of his apartment (threw the clothes out into the snow, all that jazz even) and she ended up sleeping in her car for an amount of time I’m not quite sure (1-4 weeks?).
Honestly, I learned from the experience that I take myself too seriously and that I don’t always have to win. At the time, it felt righteous; but a few weeks later, I just felt bad for robbing the girl of her misguided but ultimately harmless attempt at closure (or retribution – or whatever it is she was seeking).”
9. My Roommate Was A Slob So I Destroyed Her DVD Collection
“I had an awful roommate once… we were both in the Navy but on different ships and rarely ever home at the same time. Yet I couldn’t stand living with her. This girl was a SLOB. We both smoked, but she and her friends were way worse and left the remnants all over our front steps/walkway/lawn.
Even after I put out a coffee can with sand to dispose of them in. I would repeatedly come back from a week to two-week underways, knowing she wouldn’t be there because her ship had left a full three or four days prior, and what would I find? Trash not taken out/overflowing, sink FULL of dirty dishes, no drinks in the fridge, NO BOOZE IN THE FRIDGE! (This was an important rule, if you eat or drink what’s in the fridge you replace it!) I remember once opening the cabinet and being like, ‘Where the heck are all my cereal bowls?’ So I go up to her room and there are at least three cereal bowls with a little bit of milk still in them sitting in the corner of her room.
Ew.
And something that really got me annoyed…the lights would be on…and The A/C would be on full blast, I’m talking about 62 degrees…for FOUR DAYS, in an empty house, in the summer, in Virginia. She would then complain every month that the electric bill was too high and she didn’t want to split it.
She had a new partner every month or so (not the issue) but she would always bring them around. One charmer got into a little argument with her and punched a hole through the door in the spare bedroom.
Her ship ended up deploying early so of course, she wouldn’t/couldn’t help me move everything out or clean the house.
So as I was packing things up, I was putting all her DVDs in a pile and mine in a pile. (I had to go through each case because you know how it is if you’re lazy and don’t put the right DVD back in the right case.) And I saw the shiny reflective side of the DVD and the thumbtacks sitting innocently on the coffee table and scratched the absolute life out of her favorite movie and gently carved ‘FLIP YOU’ into it. It felt great, so I proceeded to ruin the rest of her movie collection, about 30-40 all told.
She never confronted me about it.”
8. Ask For An Empty Box? You'll Get Damaged Ones
“I work retail part-time and we get a lot of product every single week. All of our stock comes in pretty uniformly sized boxes that are perfect for packing books/bottles/DVD’s/etc. The customers somehow know that we get out stock orders every Monday, so Monday evening through Wednesday customers are always coming in (with no intention of buying anything) asking for empty boxes.
Got any empty boxes?
Where are all the empty boxes?
Can you get me 8-10 empty boxes??
As you can imagine, this is a huge time-suck for all the employees that are busy chasing down empty boxes instead of actually doing retail work, but we were told that ‘They are customers, you must comply blah blah blah.’
So, whenever anyone asks me to go out back for empty boxes, I make tiny little slits in the tape that holds the bottom together.
This way, after they’re done pestering me and wasting my night, when they go home to pack up all of their stupid belongings it will all come crashing out of the bottom forcing them to repack and re-tape.
Creating needless work for me results in me creating needless work for them.”
7. You Don't Like Me? I'll Ruin Your Precious Chair
“In college, my freshman roommate was this pompous jerk, first in his graduating class of like 12 people, who had bought a fancy chair from IKEA before coming to college. The rest of us had to use standard dorm room chairs.
I didn’t really care about the chair, but my roommate made it a point to brag about the chair to anyone who entered the room, told them to sit in it, feel how amazing it was, and then let them know that I was not allowed to sit in the chair.
I tried to be a good roommate. Bought him a music CD on his birthday even though I hardly knew him. I fielded calls from some ex of his who needed someone to talk to (and ended up becoming my friend over him because I would actually listen to her).
Despite all that, he still had this strange animosity toward me, so one day after he left for class, I wheeled his special chair down the hall into the restroom and parked it in front of the urinals so people could pee sitting down.
He went almost insane with rage about this, in part because someone (a friend) saw me do it and after I’d left, wheeled the chair down to his room to hide it, also knowing how stupidly proud he was of it.
Also, while he was away on Christmas Break, I took this large magnet I’d gotten from a stereo speaker and clamped it on his monitor so that for the rest of the year he had this ugly, doughnut-shaped color screwup on his screen.”
6. Get Rid Of My Drink? Enjoy My Homemade Strawberry Jam
“I was partying and drank a bottle of booze with a friend, and eventually I ended up on a bus home. Except I passed out on the bus, (unbeknownst to me I had also passed out at the party where someone drew on my face) I was woken up by the bus driver, and I noticed we were at the parking garage for the buses.
The driver and his supervisor explained that they could take me home if I could tell them where I lived. Somehow I remembered.
Now I’m home, and I pass out. I wake up, with the worst hangover I’ve ever had to this day.
I rush to the fridge to grab the final remaining Gatorade I had saved for this type of emergency.
My roommate tells me he poured it out so he could take an adult beverage with him on the road. I start plotting revenge.
Long story, short I ate a bunch of strawberries, vomited them up into a jam jar, and convinced my roommate that a pb&j sandwich would satisfy his munchies.”
5. Lie About Your Life? I'll Lie That You Stole Concert Tickets
“Lemme tell you about my girl Krista. She doesn’t react well when lied to. You really don’t want to mess with her.
She was contacted by an old flame who lived about 1500 miles away. They were talking a lot and she was considering going for a little visit/booty run.
He told her that he was working for a small music production company in the area and shared that he did have a female roommate but they were not seeing each other.
She called his house one day and he turned out to be at work.
During the course of the conversation, she found out that his roommate was indeed his partner. She didn’t let on that she’d had some plans for this guy herself and just continued to chat away, as girls will do. During this little talk, she learned he had lied about his job as well.
He worked at Subway. Also, he was getting set to go to a Pearl Jam concert for his birthday. They were good seats judging by the seat numbers.
On the day of the concert, my friend called the box office and reported the tickets stolen, providing the seat numbers. Yup missed Pearl Jam and got arrested.”
4. Be Mean To Me? I'll Tell Your Fianceé That You Two-Timed Her
“My best friend had been with the same girl for 12 years, we all went to high school together. They were engaged and had a wedding date, owned a house together, etc. He said some pretty messed up stuff to me so I got intoxicated and called his fianceé and told her that he had two-timed her about 5 years into their relationship (he actually had, he had confided it in me and I know he felt awful) and she called off the wedding and left him. I’m still cool with her but he obviously hasn’t spoken to me since. Still feel bad about ruining a decade-long relationship.”
3. Wreck My Car? I'll Set Yours On Fire
“So I’m driving down the highway with the right of way when I see a jerk in a Nissan Skyline coming from a road on the right, maintaining a pretty high speed. I could tell he was trying to intimidate me to slow down, but I’m thinking darn, I have the right of way, that jerk-head WILL slow down.
I don’t think he started braking like crazy before I was running past the intersection, and he smashed into the right-hand side of my car, messing up the back door and breaking the axle. My car spun around, while his stood across the road.
I spent a few moments getting it together before I got out of the car, and when I did, I saw the jerk-head leaning forward to look at me, before starting the car and speeding off.
I called a tow truck, and the police came by shortly after.
I told them what had happened and they said they would start an investigation into things based on what I had told them. A couple of weeks later, and the last thing I heard was that they had given up, as they hadn’t found any Skylines with traces of a frontal collision.
About two months later, I was walking (seeing as my car was wrecked and I had no insurance) past an apartment complex, and I saw a Nissan Skyline, very similar to the one I was hit by, with a freshly repaired front bumper, hood and all.
I went to buy lunch, and sat down in a park across the apartment complex, eating while watching. Eventually, a guy that I was certain was the very same jerk-head came out and drove away in the car he had hit me with two months earlier.
I went home and came back around 2 a.m with a can of gasoline.
I completely doused and set fire to his car.
I walked past the complex again the next morning, only to see a charred wreck being craned into a dump truck, and the jerk standing by, crying like a little boy over his lost Kellogg’s-box ride. It was easily the most satisfying moment of my life.”
2. Annoy Me? I'll Start A Rumor That You Like A Girl In Our Class
“There was this guy in my middle school named Jim. I was friends with him but he really got on my nerves sometimes. For no good reason, either – he was a really nice guy looking back.
Anyways, I started this rumor that he liked this girl in our class.
Because middle school. One day before social studies class started, a buddy and I pulled down the overhead screen so that it blocked the chalkboard that our teacher always uses, and scribbled a little something.
As soon as the teacher started his lesson, he rolled up the screen, to where it said ‘Jim & Emily’ in a giant red heart that covered the whole board. Jim’s face became bright red, and he was upset… I got called down to the counselor’s office later. I think the girl was a little embarrassed.
A good laugh, nevertheless.”
1. Landlord's Wife Wants Us To Move Out? Not Without Some Chaos
“Ex-partner and I lived in a basement apartment. The landlord was cool, but his wife was a complete jerk. Eventually, she convinced him to move her mother into the basement, so she came downstairs and told us we had ‘two weeks to get out.’ I told her we’d start looking right away, but that we might need a bit more time, but she was NOT having it.
Now of course we know our rights, so we’re taking our time finding another apartment. But this jerk made it miserable for us. She turned off the hot water every morning and banged on the floor all hours of the night.
Once I even heard her (thin walls) encouraging her kids to bounce basketballs right over our bedroom at 6 am on a Sunday morning.
Anyway, we eventually moved out. I had a good mind to trash the place, but we needed our security deposit back.
The jerk kept it, and told us to ‘take her to court if we wanted to.’ Then she smiled and waved sarcastically as we left.
Unfortunately for her, I was young, reckless, and had a lot of crazy friends.
It started with the tires.
All TWELVE of them. Imagine waking up and all three cars in your driveway are sitting on the rims, and your tires have gigantic jagged cuts in them.
I can’t remember everything we did, but over the course of a few months, we blew up their mailbox (three times), slashed a ton more tires, dumped gas all over their lawn, and pranked them at all hours of the day and night.
The grand finale was when my friend and I drove back there with a pile of fist-sized rocks and shattered every window in the house except for the kids’ bedrooms. We even got the upper level.
In the end, it’s best not to mess with people you don’t know.”
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