People Brag About Their Meticulously Planned Revenge
50. Refuse To Pay Me? I'll Ruin Your Wedding-Day Hair
“My hairdresser had a wedding party booked at the last minute. She figured the Maid of Honor was supposed to have done this long ago but dropped the ball. My hairdresser came in early and asked her two other hairdressers to come in early to take care of this last-minute group which included the Maid of Honor, 2 bridesmaids, and 2 flower girls as well as the mother of the bride…6 people total.
Now my hairdresser is a very upfront person and told the Maid of honor that since this was last minute and she had to ask her two assistants to come in early and open the shop early there was going to be a small up-charge.
I can’t remember what it was but it was something small.
They were an absolute nightmare. They arrived late, took forever to decide how they wanted their hair, complained the whole time about stupid stuff…(like seriously you don’t like the shop color scheme?)
They all decided on these crazy elaborate updos.
Each one is loaded with hairspray and hundreds of pins. Hundreds and hundreds of pins. They needed so many pins that the shop assistant actually had to get more while they were working on all that hair.
So, time to pay. The ladies start complaining that they don’t like their hair.
It is too high, it is not high enough, the curls are too tight, the curls are too loose. My hairdresser tries to set things right but she realizes what they are doing.
They are planning on not paying. Not just the upcharge. They are not planning on paying at all.
So my hairdresser goes into the back and calls the police without the customers knowing.
Well, the Maid of Honor basically confirms the scam. Says they are all very unhappy with their hairdos but now they don’t have time to have their hair redone. She even smiles snidely and says, ‘what are you going to do, take our hair?’
What a great idea.
In walks the police officer. My hairdresser explains the situation and says that if they leave without paying they are stealing her property.
Awful maid of honor yells, ‘Our hair isn’t your property.’
‘No,’ my hairdresser says, ‘but those pins are. Take them out and put them right here.
Every single one and I won’t press charges for theft of service.’
The cop loved this and agrees. They will remove every single bobby pin and then they can leave without paying.
My hairdresser said the looks on their faces were the best revenge she has ever had.”
49. Next Time You Steal My Drink It'll Be Filled With Dish Soap
“I was in high school.
From the time I was in middle school, I was in marching band. Played the French horn once I started high school band. Four days a week we would have practice after school, and being in the southern part of America, it was normal for it to be hot and humid.
Practice usually lasted from the time the class started at two until after school at 5:30. In the past there had been days at practice where people had passed out due to the extreme humidity and heat index, so we were told to bring water/Gatorade in order to stay hydrated.
My freshman year I packed a blue Gatorade in my bag every day in the side pocket. I did this for about two weeks before I started noticing it wasn’t there by the time we started practice. I thought maybe that it fell out of my bag at home (I would place them there the night before) or I misplaced it somewhere in the school building.
It happened maybe two or three times over the course of the next two weeks, so I didn’t think anything about it.
Suddenly, they started disappearing more frequently, so I started to keep my eye out for when it disappeared. I found out it was likely getting lifted while I was outside at PE, and my bag was at the fence close to the school.
Because of the foot traffic there, I had no way of knowing who it might be, so with an idea given to me by my mother, I constructed a plan to stop the theft.
One night before school, I picked a blue Gatorade to put in my bag, and instead of placing it there for the next day, I drank it that night.
After it was empty, I filled it with some blue dawn dish soap, and then slowly added water to it in order for it not to foam. I did my best to match the color of the soap and water to the actual Gatorade. After it was as close as I could get it, I placed it in my bag and went to sleep.
The following day, just like clockwork, my Gatorade gets lifted at PE. Throughout that afternoon I kept my eye out for anyone drinking a blue Gatorade but sadly did not witness anything. The next morning I had a friend mention someone puked blue Gatorade all over the ground in one of the third-floor classrooms that day.
He told me the guy took a blue Gatorade out of his pack and took a huge chug while the teacher was teaching, and then proceeded to projectile spew it across the floor. The student then ran into the hall down to the water fountain.
Best moment of my freshman year in high school.”
48. I'll Make Sure You Never Want To Use My Stuff Again
“I had a flatmate from the fiery bat. She ran up my phone bill by hundreds of dollars, despite claiming she never had any money to help pay the darn thing. She used to take things of mine (clothing, my stereo, my CDs, anything, really) and keep them in her room, and never gave them back unless I said, ‘hey, I want my stuff!’
It was the 90s, and bodysuits were all the rage.
I had a white bodysuit (you know, to wear as a top with jeans?) that had a g-string built into the bottom of it. She wore it and left a skid mark on the g-string part. Did I mention she was 4 sizes larger than me?
She ate all the food I bought.
All of it. I worked full time, she didn’t work at all, so she just sat there all day and ate my food. I starved, but she bought more food for herself and didn’t share it. I ended up having to waste money on takeout just so I could eat.
She used my toothbrush and didn’t think I knew.
She did so many selfish, annoying things, I couldn’t list them all here.
Before I admitted to myself that I had to kick her out, I did two petty things that gave me a quiet thrill. One: I worked in a daycare centre and was always catching illnesses from the children.
I let her use my toothbrush and waited. Soon enough, there was a diarrhoea outbreak in the centre. I, of course, caught it. I took an Immodium, and my flatmate had no idea I was sick at all (it probably helped that I was so used to catching gastro bugs, that I barely flinched by now, anyway).
Of course, I never told her I was sick and contagious. I brushed my teeth for a loooong time, making sure to get into every nook and cranny of my gastro-infested mouth. I rinsed the bubbles off and then ran the toothbrush thoroughly around the inside of my mouth one more time for good measure.
I continued this tooth brushing routine until I heard her worshipping at the porcelain temple, which didn’t take long at all. When she complained about how sick she was feeling, I casually mentioned that there was a gastro bug going around the centre and that I’d had it, too.
You must’ve caught it from me. Oh, sorry…
She went out and bought her own darn toothbrush.
The next thing I did is probably not as impressive, but it filled me with glee regardless, probably because she was already sending me mad by that point, anyway. So, remember I said she was always eating my food?
I bought some lamb cutlets (you know, with the bone left on, and you use it as a handle while you eat it?).
I recalled that she’d mentioned she hated spicy food, so I made my most killer chilli, burn your brains out marinade for those cutlets. Left that crap soaking for hours while I was at home. I had made sure to buy extra for leftovers.
I cooked all of the cutlets and made sure to throw the remaining marinade juices into the frypan.
She came home to find me eating lamb cutlets with a knife and fork, and having a blast because I love spicy foods. I put the leftovers in the fridge and didn’t mention that they were spicy. She thought I was weird eating them with a knife and fork when you could just use your fingers.
It was not long afterwards, that she was trying to figure out how to wash chilli out of her burning eyeballs. She’d had a taste of the spicy cutlets, didn’t like it, and wiped her eyes with her sauced-up hands. I guess I forgot to mention she also wasn’t too bright.”
47. Disobey Parking Rules? I'll Block You In
“The elementary school that my kids attended had serious parking issues. There were very few available parking spots so the school decided they would put 2 front row spots up for auction. The winner would have a reserved parking spot for the entire school year.
I won a spot and the school even put up a ‘RESERVED for OP’ sign.
One day, I arrived to pick up my kids and someone was parked in MY spot. They were sitting in their car so I got out of mine and knocked on their window and told them they were parked in my reserved spot and could they please move.
They refused. So I blocked them in and went to get my kids and we took our sweet time gathering coats and lunch boxes and of course I needed to discuss things with their teachers and the whole time, I could see the butthole in my spot getting angrier and angrier but there was nothing they could do and no way for them to exit the parking spot.
Other parents kept going up to them to tell them they were parked in someone’s reserved spot and just about every kid who went by yelled, ‘That’s not your parking spot!’ Now the parking offender was the center of a lot of unwanted attention which made them pretty angry and they got out and complained to the principal who read them the riot act.
I still kept them trapped for about another 15 minutes as I wasn’t in a hurry to be anywhere and there wasn’t anything they could do about it.”
46. Bad Boss Gets A Gross Candy Delivery
“I worked for a restaurant when I was 15 where the owner constantly came in cursing at people. One night he told me to make more bread and when I told him it would be a waste, he screamed at me, had someone else do it, and then fired me after we had to throw it all out the next day.
A few months later I gave my friend who worked there a ride, and when the owner saw me he fired my friend that night. So, later I went out of town for a week, and the house was being fumigated. The friend who got fired was watching our gerbil Reeses while we were out of town.
This was a great gerbil, super friendly, and would break out of his plastic ball just to come to hang out in your lap.
When I went to pick him up from my friend, Reeses had a heart attack in his cage and passed away in the car.
I couldn’t just bury or flush him, he was too awesome. We needed to do something to commemorate how great he was. So I had my friend stop at a gas station, pick up two bags of Reese’s candy, and a brown paper bag. I proceeded to fill the bag half full, put Reeses the gerbil in, then fill in the rest of the way.
I stapled the bag, wrote Reeses on the top, and dropped it on the owner’s front porch. I didn’t know what happened but assumed he would’ve been suspicious and checked the bag since he was such a jerk.
Six years later, my dad was talking about how much of a loser this guy was (my dad worked for a carpet cleaning service and he was one of the clients).
I proceeded to tell him about Reeses the gerbil and he was like ‘That was you?!’ Apparently, my dad had been cleaning at the restaurant one night when he came in screaming that he would kill whoever did it if he ever found out. He’d gotten halfway through eating the bag when he found the body.”
45. Be Rude To Me? I'll Assign You The Worst Room In The Hotel
“I work as a front desk agent at a hotel. Our worst room is on the third floor right above the washing and drying machines in the housekeeping dept. At around 9 am the washer and dryers simulate an earthquake.
I had a guest just be a total jerk to me.
She checked in early (before 3 pm) because she had a wedding to go to and was extremely rude when I told her the room she requested was not ready yet. She threw her honors membership status at me like I’m going to just magically make her room clean with that.
I offered to watch her stuff while she got ready in one of our large bathrooms that lock. She proceeded to say I accused her of being homeless and that she makes more than I make in a year. I offered again if she would like a room that’s ready since the wedding she was attending was in two hours.
She huffed and said ‘fine, but you better have something ready for me NOW. I don’t care if it’s 12:30. It’s close enough until check-in (3 pm) and I won’t be in the room until late since the wedding is going to end around 3 am!’
As I was assigning the rooms I realized that she no doubt wanted to sleep in.
So I assigned her to the earthquake room. We only assign that room if the hotel is sold out and if we know the guest will leave before 9 am. I smiled, gave her the keys and explained parking and Internet. For many of the members of our honor, they get two free bottles of water that are in their room.
In the snobbiest and most condescending way I’ve ever heard, she just goes ‘Uh, can I have my water now!?’ I smiled and said they were in her room.
Leaving work that day and driving away from that hotel after dealing with her constant complaints (she whined about the roads being crap outside of town) was the best feeling ever.
I found out the next day she wanted the room comped because there was a strange smell in the room and because the dryer shook her entire room. My manager didn’t comp the room since he was standing next to me when the witch checked in and kind of knew she was going to be difficult from the get-go.”
44. Bully Me? I'll Make You Sick To Your Stomach
“In elementary school, we went to the Air and Space museum and there was a flight simulator. I ended up with an absolute witch of a bully and the first words she said to me in the Simulator were, ‘I don’t like when things roll around.’ So I banked the controller hard to the side, rode the wild barrel rolls out like a champ, and got sick satisfaction out of watching her cry like she made me cry. When we got out, she called me out to the teacher, but the teacher said exactly what I said when I got into the Simulator: ‘OP doesn’t know how to fly a plane.’ It was the best moment of my little seventh-grade life.”
43. Keep Being An Unsafe Driver And I'll Get You Fired
“I had a coworker and also friend drive like a butthole during work hours in the work truck. He would cut people off, brake check them, honk when they merged near him. I voiced my displeasure with working with him several times by simply stating he was an unsafe driver.
His father was very wealthy and he only had the job to prove to his dad he could take care of himself. He ended up getting a big raise of nearly $2.00 over me yet had been there less time and had more complaints.
So, I made up a fake name, emailed the company about a fake incident, backed up the claim with pictures and video I took of him driving recklessly, and got him fired.
I don’t regret it one bit. The look on his face when they handed him his termination paper was priceless.
Two weeks later my boss called me in to say he was giving me a $2.00 raise for all my hard work. He knew. We never talked about it further.”
42. If You're Going To Send A Nasty Letter, At Least Use Spell Check
“My mom and her friend had a massive fight, and my mom’s friend sent a letter to my mom scolding her and pretty much saying ‘We’re no longer friends’ and my mom, as an Ex-Teacher, took out a red pen, corrected all the spelling mistakes and grammatical mistakes, and mailed it right back to her.”
41. I Had To Go To Extremes To Get Rid Of My Dirty Roommate
“In my second year of college, I used to share a bathroom with some dude. Now, this dude had a very clean and elegant appearance, but goshdarn he was a nasty human being. He would leave turds to fester on the toilet, pee freaking everywhere, vomit on the sink, and one day he even took a poop in the dang shower.
And of course, he wouldn’t clean the bathroom when I told him to, so it all fell on me. I spent the first month or two of the semester cleaning that bathroom every freaking weekend and sometimes I would clean it at night before taking a shower.
Now I can’t stress enough how totally humiliating it is to clean after some other nasty guy. Never mind the stress of not wanting to enter your own bathroom. Sometimes I would hold my necessities and wait until I got to a bathroom from a fast food place or a college building.
So one day in a fit of insanity I took his toothbrush and scraped the pieces of turd stuck inside the toilet with it. He used it as evidenced by the nasty stains of Aquafresh he left on the sink the next day, but it turns out that wasn’t nearly as satisfying as I thought it would be.
So one day I decide to confront him when he was with his partner in an attempt to shame him too because forget it, I’m the man! Much angry very wow. Well, that didn’t do jack. And it was stupid because I should’ve figured that his partner was nasty too as evidenced by the tampons she left hidden behind the toilet prior to this confrontation because apparently, these two are too lazy to even take out the trash.
Well, in the end, I had to talk to the landlord (what any sane person would’ve done) who contacted his parents. I finally got to see these parents scold a grown 20ish-year-old man, which was far more satisfying than my previous attempts at revenge.
A tip for you non-nasty girls. Before getting into a relationship with a man, take a look at his bathroom.”
40. I Caught My Friend Breaking Into My House And Shared The Footage On Social Media
“I had a ‘friend’ named Jimi who I played music with. I had to go out of state for several weeks for work and during that time my only roommate moved out with the help of Jimi (I owned the house btw). Jimi, knowing that nobody was there for another week or so decided to let himself in through the dog door and rummage through everything in my room.
Thank god for nest cam. He was in my room for about 10 minutes going through every drawer. Left and came back a few minutes later to do a final sweep. The last image on the camera was him noticing the camera and a literal jaw drop before he unplugged it.
As revenge, I took the video, posted it to social media, and tagged all of our mutual friends. Got a call 5 minutes later with the most frantic apology and him begging me to take down the post. Forget Jimi.”
39. Sometimes You Can't Have Your Cake And Eat It Too
“I called the bakery I used to work at and asked for my boss/owner who verbally berated me for six months for a super complex cake order. After wasting about 30 minutes of her time, I told her I wanted custom lettering on the cake. I then told her I wanted it to say ‘I reported you to the IRS for payroll tax fraud.’
They sold their business about three months ago.”
38. Won't Do The Work? I'll Do A Terrible Job For You
“In high school, we had a group paper assigned, three to a group. My friend and I scored the cherry treat of working together, but since we were pretty smart and focused we got saddled with Tyler the jerk hippie dude. He was always late or never showed up.
He was lazy, arrogant, entitled, chauvinistic, the works.
The paper had to be written by the whole group (i.e., one small paper written each and then merged into one big paper) so my friend and I got ours written well ahead of schedule and we were stuck begging Tyler to do his.
Every response had the same careless jerkish response, ‘Nah, don’t feel like it.’
We tried explaining to our teacher that our R2 unit had a bad motivator but she didn’t care. So I hatched a plan. My friend loved it so I got started.
I offered to write Tyler’s paper for him in exchange for twenty dollars.
Of course, he agreed. Our papers had a minimum word limit so I wrote a long, rambling paper on his subject, and then in white font I wrote a long paragraph about how our teacher was a horrible person. All sorts of horrible names, horrible rumors.
All in Tyler’s name.
I offered to email it in a folder with all of our papers labeled and named for everyone and Tyler agreed, so my friend and I sent the papers and waited.
Our teacher knew about the old white text trick so she also highlighted each paper to test them. And what did she see when she got to Tyler’s paper?
Tyler was suspended for several days for the horrible things ‘he’ wrote, and we were given glistening 100s on our work.”
37. Keep Being Mean And Customer Service Won't Help You
“So I used to work at this huge coffee franchise in Canada. An express location at a gas station.
This one guy comes through in a giant pickup truck and a GIANT boat attached to a trailer. But he doesn’t come through the drive-through. The way he parked covered the ENTIRE drive-through path/roadway/thru part.
He did this because he needed to fill up the tire in his boat. He could have parked a different way that didn’t block our drive-thru but he parked the way he did.
A few customers started showing up and they were able to place their order but not make it to the window.
So I went out to ask him to move (he had been there for over 5 minutes). He was out of the car but wasn’t pumping the air. I don’t think the air machine even worked. I said to him (very nicely) ‘Excuse me, sir, you’re blocking our drive-thru.
Would you be able to park this way instead?’ (Making gestures and whatnot)
I didn’t even get to finish my sentence when he started screaming at me. Like full-on SCREAMING. I didn’t even understand what he said.
I tried to calmly say ‘Sir, I’m sorry but you’re blocking our drive-thru which will then block the entire parking lot.
Can you just park over there instead? The hose will stretch.’
More screaming and he stormed into his truck and sped off, revving and whatever.
As he was storming off though, I noticed he left his phone on the top of the tire on the boat (not the trailer tire though).
I opened my mouth to say something but decided last minute ‘You know what? Because you are being a loser, I’m not gonna say something.’ So I stood there as he sped off. I didn’t get paid enough to really care.
Because the phone was on the tire of the boat and not the trailer, it stayed on as he drove off.
But I’m guessing it came off as he drove down the road because he came back 20 min later and was nicer to us (but still very rude), asking where his phone was.
I lied and said I didn’t see it. I even went out into the parking lot to see if I could ‘help him find it,’ when he asked.
Long story short, don’t be a jerk to customer service people. We’re just trying to do our jobs.”
36. Keep Being A Bad Roommate? I'll Become Worse
“My first college roommate was strange, but for now, let’s call her J. I can’t decide if she’s too stupid or too stubborn or just doesn’t give a darn. She never went to the floor meetings or anything either, not because she had a class or a club, but because she didn’t feel like it.
I could already feel something was off on move-in day when my parents left and she still wasn’t there. She did come later with all her stuff in garbage bags and her friends helping her, but no dad or mom.
When I went into college, I thought I was gonna be that one kid who always left her door open and talked to people, but I guess because I grew up in the inner city, I got annoyed at how chipper things were and closed myself off as a loner.
At first, she was nice, but over time, I hated her presence. I go to a catholic school, so you can’t have guys in your room after a certain hour. For several straight weeks, she let her partner (who I’ll call K) sleep over. And by sleep over, I mean they stayed up until 4 AM most days, going on Xbox and goofing off.
She’d listen to YouTube loud and without headphones or call her dad on speakerphone. Now I had 8:30 AM classes from Tuesday to Friday, and she oftentimes had an alarm. The problem was she never heard it, but I did. Every morning at 7:30 without fail.
I failed one of my midterms because of her and only got a D because I participated a lot in class.
Now her partner, I guess you could call him a good guy, was patronizing. He’d talk to me like I was a 4-year-old who always needed help, and it always made me wanna slap him.
But I figured if he saw how much I was suffering, he’d relent or at least say something to her. He never did, and some nights, he’d come into her room very unsober. One night he opened a lighter close to my things.
I couldn’t sleep and there’d be nights she’d invite her friends over, who were all guys.
It got so bad I took sleeping pills without telling my parents. They were worried I’d get robbed in my sleep, especially since I left all my stuff in there, like my laptop, my bus money, and the money I was saving up for a tattoo (must’ve had at least 100 dollars).
Not to mention, she would go through my things. I went away for a weekend and came back. All her dirty clothes were on my bed, she’d gone through my fridge and stolen all my water, went through my desk (which mind you had my money), and stolen all my highlighters.
I’d lend her things, like money or charger blocks, and she never gave them back.
Because she was either too stupid or didn’t care, she put a flag on the wall. Because our school is in NJ and we had the seton hall fires, you can’t have any fabric on the walls or posters or more than 20% covered.
And because I was mad at her, when the RA came for the monthly inspection, I acted like I didn’t know she did it. She did text me to ask if I could take it down for her, but I ignored it. She got fined, but a week later put another tapestry up and got even rowdier.
I figured if she’s gonna be a terrible roommate, I would be one too. I didn’t like to go grocery shopping and only got $50 a week from my parents, so I would steal food from the dining hall, put it on my desk, go to the bathroom, and leave.
She complained to the RA that it was giving her headaches, but I just kept continuing. I never cleaned out my fridge, either. Not to mention, sometimes the laundry machines would make my clothes wet or smell like mildew, so I would leave them out for a few days before I went back to do them.
She wanted a clean room, so I stayed as messy as possible, not doing laundry for an extended period of time. If her friends knocked on the door while she was gone, I just ignored them. And I acted rude if they were there. If her alarm went off, I started to sing Eminem.
I remember one night, I couldn’t sleep so I put on The Way I Am and Kim by Eminem to get them to shut up. It embarrassed them, alright, but they thought I was bumping. Not to mention how the outside heard us.
Thankfully, I went to the RA, then the GRA, then the Director to ask for a room change.
All she got was community service and still acted up. One Thursday I was taking a nap, and her friends came in and screamed with her while they cleaned. I woke up after they left and figured I should get ready for class. I started putting on my clothes and a guy (not her partner) showed up while I had nothing on top, because she gave him her key and told him to get her purse.
I went back to the GRA and she said to be patient. I talked to my mom and she was so angry she wanted me to transfer or become a commuter. She even said if one more thing happened, she’d make me go home and just Uber me back and forth.
So I emailed the VP of student life and got lucky it was a nun. All I had to say was there was a guy in my room and the problem got resolved in 15 minutes.
Now I have my own room, an air conditioner, and working heater, and she’s probably sharing a bed with K.”
35. Lazy Group Member Fails The Class
“During my master’s at university, there was a group project involving research into data mining.
There were 4 members of this group, myself, another girl, and two guys. One of the guys was absolutely fine, knew what he was doing and what he had to do, and took on his share of the workload just fine.
The girl wasn’t the hottest programmer, but was capable of research and report writing and editing.
The other guy, however, was a pain. Apparently used to just getting everything he wanted, when he wanted, he appeared to have next to no technical knowledge, and as far as anyone could tell had no place in the course.
But he was in our group, so we pressed onwards.
Programming is about the only thing I was ever good at, but I was (and remain) darn good at it, so whenever a technical project came my way, I tended to be the one doing the lion’s share of the work – but this was ok! I’d rather the entire group got a good grade, rather than submitting substandard work.
My only requirement for this is that the group members that didn’t do any programming work contributed in some other fashion – they prepare the presentation, or write the group report, or at the very least do some research that another person can use.
This guy? Did nothing.
We accepted he couldn’t really program, and his English skills were sub-par, so he wasn’t the ideal candidate for report writing, but we asked him to do the following just in case, one by one when it became obvious he couldn’t/wouldn’t do the previous:
- Code the data mining algorithm in Matlab as a proof of concept (He didn’t try)
- Write the preliminary report for us to review and add / edit (He didn’t write even a sentence)
- Prepare a PowerPoint presentation for the mandatory lecture we had to give on the project (He didn’t prepare any slides, but more on this later)
- Do some research on the data mining methods to verbally feed back to us so we could write something up about them (He didn’t).
Submission day comes around, and this fellow has done essentially no work.
We send the work off, and head over to the lecture hall to give the required lecture. As a group we had agreed on which of us would give each section of the talk – The other girl would cover the overall theory, I would cover the technical implementation, the competent guy the results, and the do-nothing had agreed to give the introduction.
The lecture starts, and this guy introduces the project…but it rapidly becomes clear he has no idea what he’s talking about. Fine, fine, we’ll recover…
Except he doesn’t stop.
This guy, apparently being aware that groups have the technical ability to choose how the marks are divided among the members, has apparently decided that if he covers the ENTIRE lecture, it’ll make up for his lack of input for the duration of the project.
Except he hadn’t told us this was his plan, and because he hadn’t done any prior reading, he was attempting to wing it. And it showed.
We attempted to take over from him 3 times, but each time he dismissed our attempts to take the stage and just kept pressing on, telling a lecture hall of 40 people complete and utter nonsense in between just reading off the slides we’d prepared.
Eventually, the professor stops him from talking and forces him to hand it over to one of us, at which point we manage to rush through the actual lecture content and get our message across. But given this was peer-assessed work, the damage had largely been done.
Now for the revenge.
Remember that groups ultimately get to decide how the grade is divided among the members? The system worked by grading each group member from 1 to 10, with the default being 5. If you gave a member greater than 5, they received a higher proportion of the marks, but to balance it out, an equal number of marks had to be removed from the other members.
This had to be a unanimous agreement between all group members, so it was rare for a group to do anything but an equal split among all members.
We submitted our recommendations to give the mess-up 1/10, reassigning the remaining marks among the rest of us.
Obviously, this wasn’t unanimous, with him opting for the standard equal split. This resulted in the entire group having to attend an academic panel with several professors to explain the discrepancy, and the offended party being super angry.
He opened the panel with a long tirade about how we hadn’t asked him to do any work, and that we’d shut him out of the project to make him look bad.
Went on and on for a good 10 minutes, before I eventually interrupted him, handing him paper copies of the emails we’d sent to him, and asking him if he’d ever done the basic research we asked him to do.
He started to repeat his previous ‘points’, saying we hadn’t directly asked him to do it, that we’d deliberately removed his ability to pass.
I interrupted again, asking him to reply ‘Yes or No.’ He got another 5 words in (none of which were yes or no) before one of the professors on the panel stopped him, thanked us for our time, and told us they’d be in touch.
Outside the room, the guy confronted me (just me apparently), and told me very loudly I had betrayed his trust, and this wasn’t how the real world worked. I honestly laughed at him and walked away.
He failed the module, and we didn’t see him again for the rest of the year.
Take that. I hope you learned your lesson.”
34. Dump Me For Another Girl? I'll Fill Your Shoes With Soy Sauce
“I was working on a fruit picking farm with other backpackers in rural Queensland, Australia. I’d had a significant other when I arrived there, and I left because he dumped me and immediately shacked up with the girl next door (who had been my friend too).
The morning I left I was up really early to catch the bus out of that crap hole, I noticed that they had been up late drinking and left their room keys in the communal kitchen. I took those keys and hurled them into the fields in front of the camp. Then I took some soy sauce and poured it into the sneakers they had left in front of their room. Soooo petty, soooo cathartic.
Also, screw you Dan.”
33. Moved Away From My Awful Roommate And Took Everything With Me
“Had a roommate years ago that was OK at first, then turned into the biggest leech/slacker after almost 2 years living together. Didn’t clean up, wouldn’t take out the trash or do dishes, ate all the food, and wouldn’t buy more groceries or pay half the bill when I bought more, the usual bullcrap.
I endured the lease for another few months before I found out he was stealing from me – funds, personal items, and later I found out he was taking my backup DVDs and copying data to his PC. So I made a plan to get moved out – found a nice one-bedroom place closer to work, got in touch with family/friends to help, and waited until he went out of town with his family for a week to get moved.
Fun fact: All the furniture was mine, either bought by me or given as gifts by family. Couches, coffee/end tables, dining room table/chairs, entertainment center…you name it, none was his. When I left I took all that, plus emptied the fridge/pantry out, packed up all the dishes/silverware (also mine), emptied my bedroom except my old mattress with box spring and old sheets, and packed up all the electronics that were mine (TV, BluRay, stereo, blender, griddle, etc.).
Since he’d been stealing from me, used DBAN to do a full wipe on his desktop and laptop hard drives as the ‘screw you’ icing on the cake.
The cable was in my name only since he didn’t want to put his name on it, so that got transferred to my new place.
Took my name off the utility bill and forwarded my mail, updated all the passwords on my online accounts, and got situated within 3-4 days. Changed my cell number, only gave it to people I wanted to have it, and moved on with my life. I got second-hand info from friends that he ended up having to move back with his parents because he couldn’t afford the place on his own, and couldn’t find a roommate either (nobody including our friends wanted to live with him).”
32. If You Won't Cook, Don't Expect To Be Fed
“So in my house, the rule is whoever is home first cooks dinner. I had left the house at 6 am and had walked in the door last of the family (4 of us). My brother had been home all day and hadn’t cooked dinner.
I asked him why not, to which he replied that HE wasn’t hungry. I stormed over to my parents and dad said he’d get us takeout. I went and got mom takeout but not my brother. When he asked why there was no food for him I looked him dead in the eyes and said, ‘Oh but you weren’t hungry!'”
31. Leave Me Stranded? I'll Get Your Car Towed
“This was actually the other week. Some ‘friends’ and I drove 5 1/2 hours to another town to watch our university play another. I was going around to hang out with my friends from home, and on the day of the game, the ones I came with all ghosted me.
They didn’t talk to me, left me on read, would decline my calls, etc. so I didn’t get my football tickets.
I reported their car for being parked in a Walmart parking lot for over 24 hours and it got towed, so they had to go get their car back while I drove back with another group of students.”
30. He Broke My Heart So I Broke Apart His Place
“Living with a guy from the age of 19, I was head over heels. He was a little older than me, and a drummer. As a teenager, I was bowled over and in love, and it was only a couple of months after we met that I moved in with him.
We’ll call him PBB.
I really, really loved him. Even when he told me he was still in love with his ex (who had backstabbed him) and would insist I should do the housework and shopping and cooking, even though we both worked full time because it was his house, he earned more than me, and I didn’t pay any rent (all of my wages went into his bank account in his name).
In case you missed it, I loved him, I really did, even when he’d started to go out and happen to iron his own shirt. Wearing aftershave. Even when he went out ‘For a couple with the guys’ then stumble into the bedroom at 3 am, hardly able to stand …
His excuse? ‘Someone had spiked his drink.’
I even still loved him when he came in at 3 am, with his ironed shirt all creased, aftershave on, and with a hickey glowing from his neck … His excuse? ‘My buddy Steve did it to me for a laugh.’
I moved into the spare room in protest, surely he would come in, apologize, change his ways, promise not to go out as often, not come back as wasted?
This stalemate went on for 2 months, I still loved him, but moved out to my parent’s house at the age of 25. I just moved a few things out with me, just my cassette stereo (lol, a couple of decades old this story) and my clothes.
I even left my beloved cat behind, on the agreement when I get my own place I can come back and reclaim him.
For some reason he let me keep a key. I realized only a couple of days later I had forgotten the lead for my boom box.
I knew he was going to be out with the guys at the time I was driving back from work, so deliberately timed it when he wasn’t at home. Pre mobile phones, I’m not having the pain of speaking to him, too much, I love him.
In and out, job done.
I walk in, something is wrong. The house is clean.
Wait, what’s this on the mantlepiece? A generic love card, no occasion but you know the kind a la Roger The Rabbit ‘How much do I love you? Let me count the ways!’ Inside was neat flowery writing ‘Dear PBB, I love you so much, from ‘mysterious woman.’
Slowly, I see the cassette answerphone machine is flashing with a message.
My curiosity turbocharges me over there. Oh, little red flashing light, what can you tell me? The female voice purrs ‘Oh, PBB, I had such a lovely night last night, I can’t wait to do it again soon!’
Looking around the room, two wine glasses. By this time my head is like a volcano.
I run upstairs to the room and there’s a freaking WEDDING RING next to his side of the bed! WHAT!!
I am shuddering, crying, drive back to my parent’s house in bits. I walk in the door, sobbing so hard and loud my Mom asked if I had been hurt…
I couldn’t talk for the snot bubbles of anguish. Why doesn’t he love me?
We talk, and I want revenge, but more than petty. I plot. I plan. I think of sewing prawns into the hems of his curtains. Too much hassle. Cutting his clothes up? Not my style.
I am too subtle for that. I want long-range passive revenge.
Dad got a van. We went the next day (Saturday) with the cat basket. Everything that I had bought and left behind I was going to take. Only things that were mine. That was the only rule.
Side note: PBB used to half-work every Saturday at a music store in town, talking drums and stuff. He was hooking up with the owner’s sister. I recognized her voice and name from the love card.
So, I took the washing machine I had bought 3 months earlier – did I mention he was a drummer – I replaced it with a washboard and thimbles he used for percussion.
I took the tin of Christmas ham that was out of date from the cupboard. I took the cutlery as it was Eternal Beau and I bought it from Argos. I took the teabags, as I had bought the last lot.
I took the double bed and mattress, and I took my cat.
Just before we left, I told Dad to sit in the van, I had my own special goodbye to say. The previous night I had found every single printed photo of his face. This took an hour, before camera phones, etc, I cut them all up and ripped them into quarters.
I hid handfuls under carpets, inside vases with dried flowers, behind picture frames, under ornaments, back of cupboards, inside the freezer ice cube tray, and behind the bath panel. Nothing obvious to the eye.
Whilst I was in the bathroom, I opened the cabinet and saw his precious Joop aftershave.
I crouched over the toilet, peed in it, and put the top back on.
Finally, I took the cassette recording from the answering machine, stopped off on the way home at a telephone booth, rang the music store where he always hung out on a Saturday, asked to speak to him, and said in a calm, controlled voice:
‘You have one week to tell her husband.
Or I do,’ and hung up.
I sold the bed the same day to a guy down the pub, sold the washing machine cut price to an elderly neighbor, and resettled my cat into my parent’s home (he loved it there).
I had a phone call at 3 am when he got home to see he had no bed or washing machine and spat down the phone that I was an ‘Evil vitreous witch.’ When I got up in the morning I had to get the dictionary out as it was pre-Google and I had no idea what vitreous meant.
3 months later part 2 came into play. I started to call his friends, pretend I was intoxicated, giggle and confess I had peed in his aftershave, so eventually, word got out what I had done, but it was too late by then.”
29. I Kicked My Bad Roommate Out Of The Dorms
“My sophomore year roommate in college was a moron for no reason. Day one, he lies in bed and cranks his TV to full volume for absolutely no reason. His level of crap would eventually lead to him immediately jumping up and locking the door the moment I’d leave the room, even for something like brushing my teeth.
When the RA would let me back in, he’d sneer ‘didn’t you remember your key?’ with a poop-eating grin on his face.
My first act was completely unintentional but I was so happy it happened. My buddy next door came over PLASTERED one night after drinking and at one point he poured milk on my roomie’s side of the room.
(Sidenote, roommate went home every weekend so he wasn’t around). Anyway, said milk had gotten into his book bag slightly so I decided to be a decent guy and wash it so he wouldn’t have a fit. I emptied everything out and put it through the washer and dryer.
Turns out I had missed a small pocket and left a floppy disk in his bag, which contained his English comp assignments. All that ‘trauma’ in the washer and dryer wiped the disk. Fast forward to the following week as he’s proceeding to finish his assignment, he can’t find his work and had no other backups.
The second time wasn’t me but a buddy. Everyone I knew, knew of my roommate and how much of a lazy loser he was. Well during another weekend later in the year, I had some friends visiting who were prospective students. After hearing all the horror stories of this guy, my buddy took the roommate’s laundry detergent into the bathroom and relieved himself into it, shook it up, and put it back on the shelf, ensuring the roommate would not have clean clothes.
The last time was at the end of the year. After enduring the lockouts, the blaring tv, him using my computer behind my back without asking because he was trash, etc I got him kicked out of the dorm. The roommate was so lazy he quit going to class midway through the first semester.
He failed his classes but was just close enough that the school offered him a one-semester reprieve to get his grades up.
He went to class for 2 weeks then quit going. He would stay up all night, play poker and then come back and watch tv at an ungodly volume till all hours of the morning, then proceed to sleep well into the day.
Then it got to the point where he would wake up at 5 am and leave to go turkey hunting.
After taking this to the RD, she deemed him to be ‘detrimental to my studies,’ especially since he was basically just renting the bed at this point and nothing else.
So, for the last 3 weeks of school, he was ordered out of the dorm and not allowed to return, forcing him to go back and live with his parents and brother whom he HATED living with, hence why he was freeloading at the university.”
28. Toss Your Basketballs In My Yard? I'll Cover Them In Poop
“The ‘kids’ that play in the garden behind my garden kept kicking their footballs and basketballs into our garden. I’m not an old crotchety neighbor but it got to the point where they were climbing into our garden and wrecking the plants. One time a basketball bounced into the house while we were having a family dinner and they nearly hit my nana on several occasions.
But the last straw was when I saw them hit my dog with one. The balls weren’t light and she was old and it really freaked her out and she had a limp. I told them to stop on several occasions so we stopped giving the balls back hoping their parents would call in and we could tell them what their kids were doing.
They weren’t young, they knew what they were doing. So the day I saw them hit my dog, I lost it. Got some of the balls and smeared them in dog poop and threw them back in a succession flying heavy crappy balls. They stopped after that.”
27. I Exposed My Bad Boss To Corporate
“About five or six years ago I was relatively new to the workforce, having worked one minimum wage job at Mickey D’s. I had been there almost two years but had little experience elsewhere. Well, this one lady always came through early every morning to order a large drink and would take a few minutes to talk to me.
I mentioned to her that I was displeased with my bosses and the working conditions, and she invited me to apply for a job at a shipping company because they were always running low on employees! That should have been my first red flag.
The second red flag went completely over my head because at this point I was 17 with no previous job experience.
When I walked in for an interview, the boss, Jeph, told me it would take five minutes. I wasn’t asked about my relevant experience, my goals within the company, or even told what position I was applying for. I assumed all interviews were different and went along with it, and started the next week with training.
Everything went well for the first month. I basically just packed boxes, took down customer information, and sorted mail into the mailboxes we managed. The real trouble started after I was given my one-month performance review.
I was deemed to be a valuable asset to Jeph’s franchise, and rightfully so.
At 17 I was able to lift more and work better than the 20 and 30-something employees, and due to the work ethic my parents drilled into me, I was never slacking off while at work. I was then informed that I would be swapping between Jeph’s two franchises, roughly 30 miles apart.
(For context, the franchise I APPLIED TO WORK AT was roughly a mile from my house, so I could walk if I couldn’t get a ride.) Every other day I had to drive out to the location and somehow justify this with my slightly above minimum wage job.
($7.50 for those not in Texas.)
Overall my boss was a massive jerk. His physical appearance could best be described as ‘troll-like’ with a shirt almost bursting, the top was always undone to showcase his aging chest hair, and a face not unlike that of A&F owner Mike Jeffries.
He openly went behind his wife’s back, bragging to coworkers about it constantly. He charged people one dollar for any amount of extra tape they needed on their package, despite the fact that we got roughly two rolls for that price in bulk. He had a special price calculator installed on the computers that charged people roughly 10% more than the package would be elsewhere.
He would push employees (who he insisted didn’t work in customer service but sales) to never offer anything less than three-day shipping even though we offered standard 7+ days and even cheaper options. I watched him actively lie to customers, claiming it was the price they had to pay blah blah blah, and almost yell at them to go to another store if they didn’t like it.
But I digress.
Now here was the first obnoxious thing that my boss did to me specifically. Until this point, I was only working around 20 hours. After I graduated from working at both stores, Jeph had me sign a brand new W-2 for his second store, which was under a different company.
(He owned both.) Again, I had very little idea that this was wrong because I had never had to deal with this before. He proceeds to add another 20 or so hours to my schedule, bringing me up to 40 hours or more. But since I worked for two separate companies, I never earned a dime of overtime or benefits of any kind.
At this point, I started accruing more and more duties, as my boss and coworkers started to trust me more and more. By my fourth month of employment (out of a total of eight), I was performing managerial duties such as: opening the store, counting the registers, closing the store, ordering products such as boxes and tape, and preparing shipments for transport.
The work alone justified a raise, not to mention the hours I was being asked to work. However, when I floated this idea to my boss, he very rudely insisted that since he had a manager for each store already, I was just doing my job and couldn’t earn a cent more.
Then came the second obnoxious move. We had a large company contract drop-off stuff with us, a telecom company we will say rhymes with Hey Tea and Tea. Customers would bring in their old cable boxes, wires, remotes, and the like, and we would scan them and ship them back to Hey Tea and Tea, the company THAT LEGALLY OWNED ALL OF THIS HARDWARE.
The customers would not pay us a nickel, but the telecom company would pay almost double what it actually cost to ship the package. There is no way Jeph could look that gift horse in the mouth and decide he was still owed the stable and all the horse’s tack as well, right? Surprise, surprise, Jeph had to take it one step further.
ANY and ALL parts/cables/WiFi adapters/USB drives the customer returned to us that didn’t have a scan tag on them, Jeph would pull aside and either strip for copper or sell on eBay. And he would force us, the employees to package his eBay sales or copper wiring into boxes and ship them for him.
He even popped batteries out of remotes and recycled them somewhere to get a tax credit. None of his employees ever saw a penny (not that I would have accepted it). We estimated he raked in roughly three to four thousand a month just from stealing alone.
For those of you bad at math, that is the price of TWO brand-new 2018 Honda Civics.
The third (and fourth) final obnoxious moves are what solidified my hatred for this boss, and my desire to strike back. They both came in the same week, roughly the same time, and both were viscerally repulsive.
My favorite coworker had recently gotten pregnant, and although the father got the heck out of dodge when he found out, she was doing very well for herself. She and I frequently closed together, and she promised she would bring the baby to sit in the back for the dull hours we had to kill from 6-10.
We also had an annual store review from corporate that week, so our boss called a late-night meeting after we closed one day. Our boss started out by saying that he was proud of our pregnant coworker for working so hard even with her ‘disability.’ (Yes, even his sense of humor was slimy.) Then, in front of all fifteen employees, HE FIRED HER.
He told her that because the Christmas season was coming up – she would only slow down the store being pregnant and all – he had to let her go.
After she left, hatred seething in her eyes, he turned back to the fourteen of us who were left stunned and continued on as if nothing had happened.
He proceeded to tell each of us our jobs for this weekend, leaving mine for last. My job, because I used to drive a decently sized minivan, was to ferry the corporate required supplies, funds for the safe, and OUR ONE WORKING FIRE EXTINGUISHER between the two stores while he kept corporate distracted between visits.
At this point, I had taken enough crap from this guy, and I formulated my plan. I started by calling the Hey Tea and Tea fraud department and telling them everything I knew. I took pictures and emailed them directly to the rep I was talking to, who seemed a little too excited about fraud being committed.
I then scheduled a visit from a Hey Tea and Tea rep at the same time corporate was supposed to show up. My next step was to call Not FedEx and explain exactly what I just told y’all, with a few extra things thrown in that I couldn’t share for privacy reasons.
They promised to send a rep as well, to the same store, at the same time.
The final step was put into action that Saturday. I dutifully loaded up my van with the supplies, funds (upwards of $4000 if I remember correctly), and fire extinguisher, and headed out.
Except I did the exact OPPOSITE of what Jeph wanted. I took the stuff to the first store he owned, which was the second one to receive a visit. After he texted the team saying they were moving on, I packed up all the crap and drove it to the other store they just left.
Now I am unsure exactly what happened at the other store, but from some coworkers, I pieced together that the Not FedEx rep showed up right after I left, but didn’t stay long, and the Hey Tea and Tea rep showed up just before Jeph had arrived and had time to hide his ill-gotten gains in his office.
The one coworker who was close enough to the office during the corporate meeting said there were lots of angry words being thrown and threats being made toward Jeph and his position as a franchisee. He also lost his franchises the ability to ship for Hey Tea and Tea, at least for a period of time.
The sad epilogue to this whole story is that he is currently still in business, and still running the same scams he was before. He WAS however fined for not having proper supplies in his stores, as well as forced to use corporate’s package rates rather than his own. So in some small way my revenge worked. He currently has a two-star review on Yelp for both of his businesses, and I hope to have a party outside his store one day when it goes belly up.”
26. Be Mean To Me? I'll Lick Your Cookie
“When I was younger I was bullied like crazy. Same 3 people for years. Anyway, they liked to be my ‘friends’ sometimes, but they still liked to put me down at any possible time. One day at lunch, one of the girls had gotten a huge chocolate chip cookie and they all had gotten up to get something else.
Well, one of the other girls I was sitting with was someone who was bullied by them also, so she dared me to do something to it. I picked that big ole cookie up, licked the bottom of the entire thing, put it back down, and didn’t say a word.
The girls sat back down and the owner of the cookie started eating it and kept on and on about ‘how moist’ it was. The happiness I got from that is still with me today. I’m not sure if she ever found out, but who cares.”
25. I Exposed My Lying Classmate In Front Of Everyone
“In year 9 we had this Spanish exam for GCSEs cause you’re graded each year rather than at the end of the course for languages. Anyway, this guy who was an absolute rat to me every Spanish lesson sat next to me, and I noticed he was being sneaky and feeding a wire up his sleeve connected to his phone.
The dude has like a meter of spare cable and he’s improvised by dangling it out of the back of his jumper and then into his pocket. I pretend to drop my pencil and slink some of the spare wire sneakily around one of the chair handles (the chairs in our school sorta had like two n’s for legs, with handles on either side for carrying if that makes sense).
30 minutes later, end of the test, and we go row by row to hand the papers to the front. As soon as he stands up the wire goes taught cause it’s still looped behind the corner of the handle.
The headphones unplug and the recording starts playing out of his phone speaker.
I don’t know if he knew I was involved.”
24. Refuse To Be Polite? You Won't Get What You Want
“Girl told me (not ask) to buy her a drink in college. I’m not against buying a girl a drink but I like to be friends with them or at least offer them first. I said I didn’t know her and she starts cursing me out.
So I order two shots, I take mine and hand her one and say I felt bad now. Once she reaches out to grab it, I pull it back towards me and take it. The look on her face was amazing.”
Another User Comments:
“I bought a round of shots and this girl I used to have a fling with wanted one. We didn’t end on the best terms and I despised her.
So I went to hand her the shot she wanted, but instead of giving it to her I just poured it out right in front of her while taking my shot.” dwdrummerboy93
23. Don't Mess With The Person That Deals With Your Mortgage
“I worked in mortgage servicing. I was in a position to try and save people’s homes by having them apply for a government modification program. They fill out an application, submit financial documents (paystubs, taxes) and if they meet the parameters, they get their mortgage brought up to date, and their monthly payment drops.
This lady didn’t qualify. I was trying to explain to her why (while being very professional) despite how rude she was being. Then she started swearing. I told her I would hang up if she continued. Then she started imitating my voice. I grew up with a speech defect that is mostly gone now.
As a kid, it was very prominent and people couldn’t really understand me most of the time. I got picked on a lot as a kid. Now I was a grown adult and here was a grown woman mocking my voice. This made me livid but I remained professional.
Then she started yelling and swearing. That was my cue. You can hang up on them if they start swearing at you and you’ve already warned them. I hung up the phone, walked away from my desk, went to my car, and screamed myself horse.
Then I sobbed for a little bit. I memorized the name, address, and phone number of this woman. I spent about a year really wanting to do something to get back at her but knowing I could be risking my job if they could trace it back to me (all calls are recorded).
A year later I was working in a different department tied to foreclosure. Guess whose name came across my desk? That’s right. This lady. I got to foreclose on her house!! I really didn’t like working in foreclosure. Got out as soon as I could.
Out of all the accounts I worked on in foreclosure, hers was the only one I felt no remorse for. You don’t have to call the people when you work in that area but I made it a point to call her (I made up some excuse that seemed routine and tedious-red-tape-sounding).
I did this just so she would know it was me who worked the account. I’m not sure if she remembered how mean she was a year before, or if she recognized my voice but I like to think she did. It felt GREAT!!! Justice was served. No regrets.”
22. Doubt My Abilities? I'll Prove You Wrong
“It was 1999 and I just immigrated from Costa Rica with my parents. We arrived in Ohio where I enrolled in 9th grade and had really good grades. We had to move to NJ in the middle of my 9th-grade year (we were living with my uncle and he turned out to be a mean weirdo) and I went to a new High School.
This particular high school offers a bilingual program, but since I was coming from Ohio and I was already used to taking all English classes I said I didn’t want to go into the bilingual program (they would give you classes in Spanish/English). I felt that I would lose my practice if I took some classes in Spanish.
Anyways… my mom and I go to the guidance counselor’s office to enroll in the all-English program. She tells me that I have a thick Spanish accent and that I should be in the bilingual program… I say no, I want all English. She becomes this huge jerk who tells me that she will put me in the all-English program but that she knows I will fail all my classes because I don’t know English well enough, that I am not prepared, and that she will see me at the end of the year with my tail between my legs asking her to put me in the bilingual program.
Fast forward to the end of the year.. not only did I pass all my classes, but my GPA was 4.0… I went to her office and put my report card on her desk and said… I guess it sucks to be wrong! Fast forward 4 years… graduated #1 in my class and now I hold a job that pays me to travel around the world. I can’t begin to explain how amazing this felt… my hate for her gave me the motivation I needed to be even more successful.”
21. Refuse To Give Me Back My Deposit? I'll Make Sure You Never Have Air In Your Tires
“I rented a studio flat while doing an internship abroad, and when I left, the landlord never gave me my deposit back. It was a 3 months deposit on a 6 months lease, so over $2500. Later in the year, something happened to me, and because I was missing the $2.5k, I had to borrow funds and was in the red for a while.
The landlord knew I was going to leave the country and after bullcrapping me for over 2 years, he stopped answering me. It was really bad for him that I really needed the funds at that time. He had plenty of apartments, so money was not even an issue for him.
Now for the revenge:
Fortunately, I remained friends with former colleagues, and as it happened in a small town, they know who he is. My friends have been removing the air from all his tires at night, a few times a month, for nearly 4 years now.
It has really become a habit, one younger brother and their friends are in the game since recently. He changed cars, but it didn’t change anything for him. He apparently now has a small compressor in his car and it takes him a while to blow air in again (to be fair, blowing the air out is not a quick maneuver either).
Once, one of my friends left a note saying it was from me, but I live on another continent now. He used to tell me I couldn’t sue him because I was in another country, who is laughing now? He tried to get the police involved, but they didn’t give a crap.
He reached me by email about giving me the funds back and that he was sorry, but that would be too easy. I don’t need the money anymore, and would not admit my responsibility in writing anyway in case I need to go back to the country one day.
He had plenty of time to pay me back when he knew I was in debt because he had my money. It’s too late now.
How it ends:
It’s either going to stop when all of my friends move which they probably won’t or when he dies.”
20. Sometimes Sharing Isn't Caring
“When I was in first grade, my teacher was a small, bitter old woman who terrified me. Let’s call her Ms. Skeletor. On the first day of school, Ms. Skeletor handed us a small calendar booklet and a sheet of paper with a bunch of different squares with pictures of types of weather.
Every morning we were supposed to cut out a square based on what the weather was like and glue it on the day. Simple.
About a week into school, I reach into my desk and pull out my little calendar, but I can’t find the paper with the weather pictures.
I’m of course confused since it never left my desk so I walk around the room and ask kids around me if they’ve seen it. Still nothing. I am not worried at this point because it had my name on it and my naïve six-year-old brain thought, ‘if someone found it they’ll give it back soon.’
For the rest of the year, I’m getting mild panic attacks for the first five minutes of class cause I don’t have this stupid weather chart and I’m too scared to ask Ms. Skeletor for a new one. This goes on for the entire year.
Every time someone asks where my weather chart is I Matrix-Neo dodge the question (probably not, since I was six but back then I thought I was slick).
Eventually, it’s the last day of school and we’re packing up our stuff to take home with us.
Everyone is excited cause we’re allowed to play outside with toys we brought from home. I’m relieved because I’ll never have to face Ms. Skeletor or my blank weather chart again.
This is where the pettiness comes in.
This kid walked up to me as I’m packing up.
Let’s call him Goblin. Now Goblin was one of those kids no one in the class liked. He would always be alone at recess but whenever you invited him to play tag, he would soon storm off saying we were being sneaky. He was also rude, disruptive in class, and all-around a nasty kid.
Thus the name Goblin.
Goblin walks up to me and thrusts this old, hole-filled paper in my face. I turn it over and lo and behold, it’s my missing. weather. chart. I’m so shocked I can’t say anything. Goblin responds to my silence by spitting out,
‘Sorry, I just borrowed it.’
Last time I checked you don’t borrow something from someone for a year without saying anything by taking it OUT OF THEIR FREAKING DESK.
So, I snapped. Later when we were on the playground, I found Goblin playing by himself (of course) with his brand new toy robot that he had been talking up for a week before. I ripped the toy out of his hands, sprinted to the side of the playground adjacent to the street, and hurled it as hard as I could up in the air.
The robot of course shattered in the middle of the street, just like Goblin’s heart. This kid is now sobbing staring at what is left of the robot. It’s at this point I should have walked away. Revenge over. But no. To twist the knife even further, I walk over to Goblin, still sobbing, lean in, and say,
‘I’m just borrowing it.’
Yeah, obviously I was possessed by a demon that day. But I never saw Goblin after that. I heard he moved but IDK where. It’s been over a decade and I’m pretty sure Goblin is looking to murder me.”
19. My Mom's Partner Was A Jerk So I Made His Life Miserable
“When I still had to live with my mother and her partner, they were terrors. My mother’s partner (call him P), is a 60-year-old biker who is one of the most annoying, most unintelligent men I’ve ever met. And during the time I was in college, he just got worse and worse.
He’d flip out over ‘bad smells’ in the house and didn’t put two and two together that the smells were his fault. Man would sit and smoke in the house every 20 minutes, throw leftover food into a ‘food bag’ that hung in the laundry room, and would wash dishes so poorly that they always retained a layer of old grease.
Then he’d yell at me about how it was all my fault that the house was gross. Once he’d even left crumbs everywhere then pound on my door about how I needed to clean up my mess. I didn’t even eat bread that day. Yikes.
In high school, he threatened to hurt my cat for leaving paw prints on his truck. That he could just… wash off. He wouldn’t wash or brush his super fluffy dog, then would whine about the dog smell/dog hair in the house. He complained that a heat lamp for my button quail eggs was going to run up the electric bill, but he has no problem leaving the TV on from 5 AM to midnight, even when he’s not watching it.
My mom never said or did anything about him, and he’s still with her somehow. And that stuff is just the tip of the iceberg. But I won’t go further into it.
So I didn’t and don’t like this man. Now, back to when I was in college.
During breaks when I was home, I’d do whatever I could to make life annoying for him and my mother. Just… small things. But it was still so funny.
He had ‘bad smells.’ So when I was home alone, I’d cook eggs and then throw little bits of egg into their room where they wouldn’t find them.
I’d wipe runny uncooked egg on the sides of and behind surfaces in their room, like paint. Their room would smell like farts and rotting food. I’d take dirt and put it on their bed or under their covers, so they’d get uncomfortable at night.
If P woke me up at 5 AM stomping around, or if he stayed up till 3 AM with the TV on loud, I would get up the next day and play music he’d hate loudly on my laptop, and place my laptop in front of my door.
He hated it.
But my favorite thing was when I made everything sticky. I’d mix water, syrup, sugar, and honey together…. then wipe it down on their side of the dining room table. On their chairs. On the side tables next to the couch. On the counters. And one day, as I was in my room, I hear ‘Why is the table so STICKY?’ It’s sticky because you guys are total jerks, that’s why!”
18. Refuse To Tip? I'll Give You A Good Reason Not To
“I worked at an Italian Restaurant in high school. It was in a tiny town of around 1000 people, so 90% of our clientele were friendly locals (until tourist season kicked in).
However, one lady came in 2-3 times a month and she was the Anti-Christ.
She was extremely rude, messy, condescending to staff, and literally NEVER tipped.
Seriously, she’d write a ZERO on the tip section of her bill, with an explanation as to why she didn’t leave one.
My pasta was too hot. ZERO.
My pasta was too cold. ZERO.
My pasta was too delicious.
Your breadsticks are made of bread. ZERO.
This Coca-Cola has Coca-Cola in it. ZERO.
To top things off, this lady was vegan and would constantly badger us about it. She’d even ask if obvious items were vegan, just to make sure we knew for sure…
So anyway… My coworkers and I started putting cheese and bacon bits in her food. This went on for months and months until a coworker cracked and told her the truth in a fit of rage.”
17. Guy Wouldn't Stop Bothering Me So I Gave Him The Number Of The Mean Girl Downstairs
“Mid-’90s; living in a triplex in a fancy city neighborhood. The new downstairs neighbor is a pure witch from the fiery depths of Lucifer’s cave. Rude to people; when I rescued her cat she grabbed the poor thing so fast that it scratched me and she didn’t even say thanks; sent my roommate, who struggled with weight, a note about his ‘fat footfalls keeping me up all night.’
Went on for a year.
Was up late one night, instant-messaging a colleague over AOL instant messenger (this was long ago, kids), when some random guy mistook my gender-bent username as female.
Boy, did he pester me. For two hours, he KEPT SENDING MESSAGES. Just wouldn’t take ‘no’ (served dozens of different ways) for an answer.
Finally, I broke down – Yes, I said. Yes, I will talk with you. Here is my phone number.
I sent him the # of the witch downstairs. The phone rang in about two seconds. I heard her answer, and after about three seconds, she started yelling into the phone.
He called her back 3-4 times. Each time I heard the phone ring downstairs (thin walls) I would laugh so hard I’d almost cry.”
16. Spoiled The Ending Of Harry Potter To My Deceiving Ex
“Back in 2005, I was seeing this girl who was a huge Harry Potter fan. She took a 2-month trip to Ecuador and was going to move in with me upon return. The Half-Blood Prince came out in hardcover while she was gone, so I bought her a copy as a ‘welcome home’ gift.
During our long-distance phone calls, I started to notice she was acting strange. I asked her a couple of times if she had met someone, but she denied it every time. Luckily some mutual friends were on the trip with her, and they gave me the heads up that she had hooked up with, not one, but two different guys.
I called her out, and she finally caved and admitted to it. When she came back to pick up the stuff she had left at my house, she was surprised to find a brand new copy of The Half-Blood Prince with an inscription that read, ‘Welcome Home. Dumbledore dies in the end. Sucks to be the last to know, huh?'”
15. Neighbor Feud Ends With A Malicious Farewell
“My parents told me when they first moved in, these two neighbors FREAKING HATED each other. They would constantly fight each other at every pass. This went on for years. Finally, one of them moved, and I guess the other neighbors snuck over in the middle of the night and put a locking gas cap on their car.
That would be an unpleasant surprise to find out when you’re hundreds of miles away.”
Another User Comments:
“I once found one of these before I even knew about them. It looked shinier than the one I had and my curiosity got the better of me and I went ahead and tried it on my car to see if it would fit.
It fit! I then went to take it off to return it and it went click click click like a childproof cap. I examined it to figure out how much of a fool I was. I ended up taking a screwdriver to it and breaking the internal mechanism (plastic).” etilauqa
Another User Comments:
“My old car had a locking petrol cap and oh my GOD I hated the thing.
I could never get it open! Or closed when I had got it open! That sodding cap caused me to have a breakdown on a crowded petrol station forecourt! I loved the car but HATED THAT CAP.
This is the cruelest revenge on this thread in my opinion.” smidgit
14. They Egged My Place So I Stole Their TV Remote
“One night I was watching some TV when I heard some loud knocking on my front door. When I went to check it out, I saw egg yolk dripping down the window. Since I live in an apartment, I found it odd that someone would throw eggs at my door, so I quickly looked out and saw some guys leaving the access gallery of my floor.
Figuring they lived in my building, I quickly exited the floor on the other side and hid in the parking lot to see where they would emerge and where they lived. They turned up on the top floor where they proceeded to throw some eggs at the houses across the street.
When they moved again, they came back to my floor and entered the apartment right next to mine, they were my next-door neighbors!
I went back inside fuming with anger and tried to think of a way to make them pay. Before I went back into my apartment I sneaked past theirs to see what they were up to.
They were all sitting in the kitchen drinking and having a laugh. So I went through my apartment to the balcony at the back and slipped onto their balcony. The door was open, so I could just walk into their apartment. I had a quick look around and stole their TV remote.
Petty? Yes. But it made me feel a lot better.”
13. Rude Customer Receives Wrong Coffee Order
“When I worked at a cafe, I had one lady come in every day before work and make nasty comments. She was horrible.
‘So are you going to school, or is this pretty much it for you?’
She got decaf on Mondays and Tuesdays, then regular for the rest of the week to get her used to it again before starting over the next week.”
12. Kick Me In The Shin? I'll Fill Your Boots With Water
“When I was in boot camp, the drill instructors would make us chug a full canteen of water from these nasty canteens to force us to hydrate. I was the last one to finish drinking mine and so one of the squad leaders (another recruit in a meaningless leadership position) came up to me and kicked me in the shin for being so slow.
He kicked me so hard that it left a knot on my shin that didn’t go away for months.
So a couple of days after he did that, I was on fire watch, which is basically guarded duty while everyone else is sleeping. The next morning we had the crucible which was 3 days of field activities and ended in a 10-mile hike with full gear up a steep mountain.
So that night, while he was asleep, I took my canteen and filled both of his boots up with water. He had to wear them and was practically in tears about the terrible next few days he was about to have. When we did the hike up the mountain he couldn’t finish it and had to ride in the safety vehicle in shame with one of the drill instructors. He went to medical afterward and got dropped from the platoon and (presumably) graduated with another company. He messed up my shin but I gave him trench foot and nobody ever found out that it was me. Screw that guy.”
11. Filled My Ex's Box Spring With Potatoes
“My step-sister found out her partner was lying to her. One of the last things she did before she moved out was slice a hole in the fabric under his box spring and hide a bunch of potatoes in there. Have you ever smelled old potatoes? He didn’t figure out what the smell was until he moved. He thought something died in his walls.”
10. I Turned My Bad Neighbor Into The Cat King
“I’ve had a long-standing feud with a jerk neighbor that started when he called the fire department for my owning a fire pit in my backyard when he’s not even on my block and I don’t even use it. Then he went to the city library to investigate old permits on my house from 50 years ago leading to lawyer fees and several appearances before the planning board. This was all because I told him to screw off once when he came into my yard to complain about where I stored my trash can.
So far I’ve spread 5000 catnip seeds in his yard and superglued his windshield wipers down.”
9. Beware Of The Poop Butter
“The Poop Butter story comes to mind.
Not sure if it was true, but when I was at university there was a story going around about the kid who lost it with his housemates.
Basically, you had a communal fridge and people just kept helping themselves to his margarine/butter/milk, etc.
One day someone was using his butter, pretty close to the end of the tub and they got to a brown layer.
The kid had scooped all the butter out, melted it, pooped in the tub, and then filled it back up again.”
8. Dogs Can Get Revenge Too
“One time my dog came into my room and jumped on the bed while I was sleeping, waking me up. I scolded her and told her to get down. She slowly hopped off the bed, turned to look at me, sat down, and WHILE MAINTAINING EYE CONTACT scooted her butt across the floor, leaving a nice little poop mark.
Looked away, stood up, and left. I miss that little gremlin.”
Another User Comments:
“Had two dogs and both hated the rain. My wife had gone to bed and it was time to let the dogs out. It was pouring. I made them go out and the one dog did what he was supposed to do.
The other clung to the side of the house and wouldn’t step out into the yard. Eventually, I let them both back in. Gave the dog that had peed his treat. Didn’t give the other one a treat. They trotted off to get in the bed.
An hour later, as I’m feeling my way in the dark to get into bed, my hand lands in a big cold wet spot in the middle of my side of the bed. Had to wake up the wife so we could change the sheets.” AnotherStupidName
Another User Comments:
“I just got a puppy, he’s the most adorable 16-week-old black lab.
He also has a bladder the size of a cashew. I was in a serious siege playing State of Decay 2 and of course, puppers needs to pee. I didn’t take him immediately, how could I? It was an all-out war. Got to a place I could pause it and took him out.
After we came back in, I went to change out the laundry and when I went back to continue, I no longer had a left bumper on my controller. I just looked at his cute little face and told him ‘good game, buddy.'” Blazindaisy
7. Put Chalk On My Sweater? I'll Make You Sit In It
“We had black pants and a white shirt with dark green sweaters for uniform in our school. The guy behind me was just being annoying and drawing stuff on my back with a piece of chalk he got.
During the break, I went to the seat behind him and sat there talking to the guys there, just waiting for him to return.
Just before he sat, I slipped a piece of chalk onto his seat. He sat on it, didn’t seem to realize for at least the next 2 hours of class, and he’s not the kind to sit still, always squirming in his seat.
It was petty but it was good revenge.”
6. Mess With My Laundry? Good Luck Drying Yours
“Some jerk took my laundry out of the dryer after it was done, but instead of putting it on top of another dryer or washer, he threw my bedsheets on the floor. Needless to say, that was probably the biggest loser move I’ve ever had done to me by a complete stranger.
These dryers have timers that continue to run, even if you open them. So, I opened the dryer he took and closed it back without restarting it, essentially wasting an hour of his time if he doesn’t check it. I come back to grab some clothes an hour later, and he had just restarted it.
I wanted him to know it was a deliberate choice, not just someone’s accident, so I did it one more time. The guy either gave up or spent 3 hours trying to dry some clothes. All because he was too inconsiderate to put someone’s bedsheets ANYWHERE ELSE but the disgusting floor of a college laundry room.”
5. I Filled My Awful Landlord's Piano With Rats
“I had a dreadful landlord with whom I had to live (I was essentially one of three lodgers). I lived in his home for about 3 months, watching other tenants come and go. The roommate turnover was very high and for good reason. This man combined the worst qualities of a hoarder with an OCD neat-freak, had no sense of boundaries or scale, neglected basic landlord responsibilities such as ensuring heat and power, and spoke with a murderer’s whisper.
And yet, I never showed the slightest hint of displeasure. I smiled through everything and was always courteous and friendly in the face of his awfulness. I knew, you see, that someday I might have to correct him, and it would be better if he had no anticipation of any impending retribution.
I had a spare key cut for his house and kept it in my pocket at all times.
When he refused to return my deposit until a month after I had left the premises, I began my plan. I waited. And waited. And waited. Three months after I had left, with my cash firmly in hand, I went to a local pet store and bought several frozen rats.
They are intended as snake food, I believe. I cased his house until he and all his current tenants had left. Then I entered, fed his dog some treats, and dropped the frozen rats, one by one, inside his beloved piano.
The rats, you see, began to thaw very slowly.
Then they began to rot. Have you ever smelled the rotting carcass of a dead rat? It’s vile. Putrescent. It permeates everything. There is a reason for the phrase ‘I smell a rat.’ I knew it would take some time before he could find the source of the smell.
I knew further that the bloated, oozing corpses would utterly ruin his piano. But above all, I knew that he would have absolutely no way of connecting the incident with any kind of human intervention. It would look, for all the world, like a nest of rats, had made their home and perished in his piano.
He could not convincingly lay blame on me or anyone else present in his house.
Revenge isn’t about teaching people a lesson, you see. It’s not important that they know what they did wrong. It is merely enough to mete out the appropriate level of cosmic punishment for your own sense of satisfaction.”
4. We Removed "No Parking" Signs To Avoid Court
“Someone, definitely not me, got a parking ticket on my street after the city decided my entire street should be ‘no parking.’ A party was thrown at a house that definitely wasn’t mine and after everyone got well liquored up, ratchets with sockets matching the size of the bolts holding the ‘no parking’ signs were distributed.
Up and down the street small women stood on the shoulders of volunteers removing signs. A full street in southern California was liberated from the tyranny of ‘the man.’ 17 signs were collected allowing pictures to be taken showing no visible signs for court. Fine was dismissed by a clearly suspicious judge and the peasants rejoiced.”
Another User Comments:
“My buddy did this with a street cleaning sign.
There was only one on the block and it was right in front of his house.
He didn’t feel like moving his car (I actually think it may have been broken down that week) so he just took the sign down before he got the ticket.
I think he still has it in his apartment too.” shander
3. Bad Landlord Gets His Place Infested And Torn Down
“Had a terrible landlord once. Refused to fix windows that were broken before I moved in, basically just a craphole owned by a slumlord. Took him to small claims court for a number of reasons, and ended up getting my next 6 months paid for at my next apartment.
There was a small trap door in the closet floor to access shutoff valves for the plumbing, so before I moved out I got scrap meat from a local butcher (stuff they can’t sell) and placed it in the trap door. A few months later the place gets condemned due to vermin infestation and gets torn down. This was also before cell phones, so a couple of times I got my female friend to call his house when I knew he wasn’t home. His wife would answer, and my friend would ask for him and act nervous and hang up.”
2. Keep Being Annoying And I'll Trip You
“On a charter bus with the youth group back in the day. This one girl had a reputation for being super annoying and not very nice. Well… she was living up to it. When I asked her to stop screaming she told ME to shut up. I gave it about 5 min before I had the opportunity to stick my foot out in the aisle and trip her as she ran past. She went FLYING and fractured her rib on one of the armrests.”
1. Fight With Me And I'll Clog Your Toilet
“This kid was always a huge annoying jerk to me in the sixth grade, and he tried to steal my crush. We would play basketball during recess and he would always excessively foul me. I told him not to or we would end up fighting.
I was scared of fighting because I didn’t want to get in trouble when I got home for being suspended. But one day I went up for a jump shot and he pushed me into a brick wall and I hit my head on one of those windows that open out from the inside and it hurt like heck.
So I got up and punched him in the head and then the gut. After that, I threw him at a brick wall and he fell into a planter. I got suspended and my parents were happy I stood up for myself and I wasn’t in trouble.
He would always make stupid and sly comments after that but was always afraid to really mess with me. Just enough to mess with me but not get in trouble for it. Well, I forgave him since I already beat him up but kept it in mind.
We became friends after a while.
Later that year it was snowing and we didn’t have school. I was bored and decided to walk around. I saw him in his backyard and he invited me over. We had a snowball fight and made snowmen. His mom really liked me.
She made me cookies and gave me some hot chocolate. An hour or two later I had to poop but I couldn’t make it home. I asked if I could use the bathroom there and his mom told me yes, so I pooped. But it wasn’t just any poop, it was the most poop I’ve ever pooped, I think it was diarrhea but it was six years ago so I can’t remember. Needless to say, I saw him at school the next day and he said I flooded their toilet and it cost them $150 and his mom was angry. HA screw him. Good.”