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I'm going to be the odd one out and give you an ESH. Never make plans with someone else in your friend's birthday. Make sure they want nothing. Yeah hinting is not a plan, but tell them as such. Making plans with someone else in your friend's birthday is not okay unless you bring them or make sure they are down with it. I know it sounds silly and stupid but unless you are willing to just cut them out, this is going to be something you will regret. It's their birthday.
How old is this dude?!? 12?!? NTJ!!! Anyone with any sort of apathy can tell when someone isn't acting normal and will want to make sure they are okay. Yeah, sure he didn't know how bad you felt but damn, what kind of person knows someone had surgery, doesn't care how it went, and ignores you all day? This is ridiculous. No empathy what so ever.
Go to dinner because she invited you. Not because they are there. That simple.
Ntj. It wasn't their day it was yours. They forgot that. Everyone forgot that. Yes, they wanted to do something nice for you but that doesn't trump what you wanted. I don't do birthday parties because no one cares enough about me to attend. I get mad when someone golds one for me because I specifically told them not to. My birthday, do what I want, not what you want, it's my day. Very ntj.
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