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NTJ - Look a few moves down the road. How long would it have been before he tried to tell your mother you were coming on to him? You were being set up. He wanted to see if you would tell. If you didn't tell next steps were on deck. You absolutely did the right thing.
Interesting. I wonder if she's doing it for the attention (Munchhausen/Factitious disorder imposed on self), or because of an inability to control her lying (one of the personality disorders), or if she truly has delusions of illness (somatic delusions), or if she has Health Anxiety OCD, also called Illness Anxiety Disorder among other names. The prostate cancer (I assume prostate based on the info given) issue seems like it would come from one of the latter, not for attention because it makes no sense. Regardless, the lady clearly needs some mental health evaluations and likely additional meds/counseling depending on her Dx. While this is a interesting story for me, it has real world implications for the OP & wife. Please keep your wife as far away from your SiL as possible. She is clearly unwell, just not in the way she believes she is.
YTJ - You got jealous and basically called your girl social media hoe, because of your own insecurities. Get it together and work on why you feel you're not enough for her. Stop blaming her for what's going on inside you.
YTJ Why do you think telling her the cat can't move in is "hardball back"? She's already told you what the deal is. You seem to think she's desperate to move in. But she's already told not only that she won't move in but you might as well stop seeing each other because she's NEVER going to chose being with you over her cat. I noticed you didn't say anything about getting rid of your dog if it can't get along with the cat. Because you never plan on having the cat. You want everything the way you want it, with no compromise for what's important to her. WTH would she want to move in with such an inconsiderate person who doesn't even take her needs into account? She has made it clear more than once, where she goes her cat goes. Move on and stop wasting her time.
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