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YTJ. Just because it’s not your idea of how to spend a weekend doesn’t mean that your roommate is weird to have a close relationship with his mom. I’m wondering if there’s some jealousy going on with you. Do you have a strained relationship with your folks? Do you not see them often? Whatever the case, you really should apologize.
NTJ if you’re excusing yourself from the main room and going to your own room. That way you’re in your comfort zone but others can continue doing whatever they were doing. YTJ if you expect everyone else to drop what they are doing to give you the quiet you want.
I completely understand where your at with everything because I’m in a similar situation myself, minus the wedding. I haven’t talked to my dad in over a year and to be honest, you & I are both TJ’s. What it really comes down to is forgiveness and I know I haven’t forgiven my dad for something he said and for always cheating on my mom. It doesn’t sound like you’ve forgiven your dad either. I know forgiveness isn’t for the other person, it’s for ourselves so we don’t carry that crap around forever. It gets damn heavy. I’m not calling you out, I swear! I’m calling myself out! Sometimes, we get so used to carrying around all the extra crap, that we don’t know what to do without it. It almost brings a twisted sense of comfort. But if we would truly forgive our dads, we would be lighter and more peaceful. Just because you forgive, doesn’t mean you forget or that you have to have that person in your life. It means that you’re healing and moving forward. Best of luck!!
YTJ most definitely!! She could go to her doctor and get a letter stating that the cat is a comfort animal and then there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. She’s an 86 year old woman who has no family, probably a few friends and she was isolated because of Covid. Do you not have any empathy, compassion, mercy in your brain/heart/body?? I admit, according to landlord/tenant laws, you’re in the right and would win the eviction in court, but what kind of example are you setting for your kids? How is her having a cat affecting you, right now? Who cares if you’re allergic. You can’t legally enter her apartment unless you post a 24 hour notice or if it’s a water emergency. You could ask for a reasonable pet deposit and let her make payments on it! An 86 year old woman isn’t going to let an animal damage a home she’s lived in for over 20 years. When she passes away, you’re going to have to clean, paint, etc. in order to get it rent ready. Responsible pet owners take care of their animals, treat them like family. You really need to rethink your actions. Do you have any idea how much stress you’ve caused this woman, all because you choose to be inflexible. Remember, the mercy and compassion you show others has a way of coming back to you. The reverse is also true. If you fail to show those things to the people around you, they won’t be shown to you either. Best of luck! (I hope you do the right thing! You know what the right thing is too!!)
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