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I can't tell if Tina is jealous of you or your boyfriend
You are in no way, shape, or form the jerk in this scenario. Your brother was a gigantic douche canoe and you stood up for your spouse. That's the way it should be.
You are absolutely the jerk here. You know this girl's parents aren't in the picture and she's had to transfer to a school where she doesn't know anyone. Your friend seems like a genuine and kind person for taking Sara under her wing and being there for her. You just come off as a jealous asshole.
If there's even a remote chance that he could expose their children to drugs and/or violence then no, she absolutely should NOT let him live there. He's admitted to joining a gang for "survival" and I don't know of any gangs that just let members leave whenever they want which opens this family up to danger. People do deserve second chances but in this scenario, the children should be the top priority.
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