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Definitely find an attorney. You have rights and they don't. YNTJ & had every right to put him in his place
You most certainly do not need anyone's permission to do anything. Tell your sisters to mind their own business. Your cousin is immature, entitled, and a brat. If you don't want to go because you don't want to then don't. But don't let the reason be because of how your cousin will feel.
They want to bury the remains. This can actually be done at a later date, it isn't imperative to do it immediately.
You wife sounds like the problem. Me, me, me... what I'm not getting. She sounds entitled. Why can't she get a job? Sounds like she wants to alienate you from everyone in your life. Your friend has no control over what his spouse says as do you with your wife. NTJ
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