People Give Us The Chance To Comment On Their "Am I The Jerk?" Stories

"For the past few weeks, I've been playing Trivia every week with my coworker and her friends. I'm also always going there straight from work since it's right afterward, so I'm dressed a little nicer in my work clothes.

A few years ago, for a few different reasons, I decided to stop buying clothes and now exclusively make my own.

A lot of my stuff tends to have a little more of a vintage/historical flair, so it's a little unusual and people comment on it occasionally.

Because of that, occasionally I'll come in with a new outfit that I'm pretty excited about since I just finished making it, and my friend or the waitress at the bar (who also knows I make everything) will ask me if it's new and I say yes and there's not usually much else to the conversation.

A few times when this happens one of the people at the table (we'll call her Kelsey) will kinda roll her eyes or give me a dirty look.

This past week I wore a dress I made a few months ago that I'm still fairly proud of, and when I walked in the waitress made a joking comment to me along the lines of 'Wow, that looks like it was custom made for you by a tailor'.

I answered that it was. I thought it was pretty clear from our tones that we were joking, but Kelsey must not have picked up on it.

I don't remember exactly what she said because it felt rather sudden, but it was something along the lines of 'We get it, you're rich.

Stop rubbing it in. Not everyone can afford designer clothes and custom-made dresses.' I told her that I wasn't rich and that the joke was that I AM a tailor, and I made the dress for me. It's not designer, it's just not what's typically produced by the fast fashion industry. Fabric is expensive, so most of my clothes are made from fabric that was given to me by my grandmother before she passed, and tablecloths and bedsheets I either got from her or bought from Goodwill. There is also a local overstock discount fabric shop that I go to sometimes as well.

She didn't say anything for a while, so I assumed the conversation was over and I waited for Trivia to start since the table was pretty quiet after that.

After a few minutes, she said something about how not everyone has time to sit around all day making dresses, and I reminded her that I work full-time.

Then there was a comment about how not everyone has access to the same resources to learn how to sew or has a grandmother who could conveniently give them a bunch of fabric, which is true. I'm not denying that there is a systemic level of privilege in being able to go to college for a costume design degree and having a grandmother who could afford nice fabrics. I admitted in that area she did have a point and I apologized, and we went on with the game, though things were pretty awkward after that.

I was just excited about something I'd worked hard on and was proud of, I didn't really intend to rub it in everyone's face and make them think I thought I was better than them."

Another User Comments:

"NTJ - Kelsey is a bitter, unhappy shrew and needed someone to take it out on. You can really tell because after she got caught flat-footed when you told her that you MADE your clothes and aren't rich, she didn't shut up and apologize.

She instead was BRIEFLY quiet and then moved the goalposts to still try and come at you. Hopefully, everyone else present could see it for what it was... Projection of her own unhappiness and some jealousy." Aggressive-Bed3269

Another User Comments:

"NTJ, and it's awesome that you are able to create your own dresses!

That is very impressive as I barely can sew the few holes or rips my kids got in a few stuffed animals or pajamas. Your friend got bothered by something, and she kept being bothered by something at every turn. If this is normal behavior, I feel sorry for her. If it is unusual for her to react like this, maybe something else was bothering her, and this was her more reacting to that. Good luck with her." Severe-Hope-9151