People Have Us Dropping Our Jaws At Their "Am I The Jerk?" Stories

Sounds like a control freak.

"My ex likes to tell me what I should and shouldn't do on my custody days, and I generally ignore her, because there is a reason we divorced. She has a list of food she doesn't want our daughter to eat, and I don't pay attention to her list. I drop our daughter off at school on Monday mornings, and her mother picks her up.

She called me yesterday to say she was cleaning our daughter's lunchbox and found onion slivers and asked if any of the lunch I packed her had onions.

I said yes, it did. She said that onions were on her list. I said I didn't care.

She said onions make our daughter smell bad when she sweats, and kids will bully her. I said that at my house our daughter showers, and she might try that at her house as well.

She called me a spiteful jerk and told me no more onions.

Our daughter likes onions, so I'm going to ignore her. A part of me does wonder if I was petty though. It makes me mad when she tells me what to do, so maybe that is clouding my judgment."

Another User Comments:

"NTJ. There's no requirement after divorce that forces you to use a list of approved ingredients by your ex.

Next, the question is: is the food that I have my daughter eat so rare or bizarre that it is a cause for concern? Onions - no. Other questions that you can evaluate: Are onions unhealthy in the quantity she eats it? No. Is it commonly known that eating onions leads to bullying for kids? No. Even: Does eating onions make your sweat smell? I'd even say no to this. Conclusion: NTJ." olavla

Another User Comments:

"NTJ. If your daughter doesn't have a medical reason (such as an allergy) to avoid a food, then this is a non-issue. In contentious custody situations, the best course of action is to parent in your own home and let the other parent do their thing in theirs without comment so long as the child is safe and well cared for.

This is called "parallel parenting" as opposed to the co-parenting people can do when they aren't at odds after divorce. Your ex is out of line and trying to control you through your child. You did nothing wrong other than be a bit snarky but who wouldn't be in such a situation?" deleted

Another User Comments:

"Unless she is allergic to onions and you are ignoring her allergies you are NTJ. I have a child with severe life-threatening allergies and people have tried to give her the allergens on purpose to prove a point to me (she is also a picky eater but at 18 I can’t do much about that) my sister-in-law would give her the allergen to prove she is better.

Multiple ER visits and I am NC anymore with her and my daughter trusts NO ONE with her food. If it’s your ex who is the picky eater and she is trying to make her daughter a picky eater then you are NTJ." hurtingmama