People Await Our Comments On Their "Am I The Jerk" Stories
36. AITJ For Not Wanting To Buy Christmas Gifts For My Stepmom?
” “I (16 F) have parents that divorced three years ago because my mum came out as gay.
It was a huge shock to my whole family since there had never been any signs and my mum handled it very badly. She had no patience with anyone and when my dad discovered she had been in a relationship with another woman for almost a year prior she accused him of being homophobic and left. Our family had no contact with her for two and a half years until I received a wedding invitation in June to her and the same other woman’s wedding.
I didn’t go, but I learned that the woman had two kids (8 and 10) and my mum was living with them now.
The therapist I started seeing when they divorced suggested that I start trying to make her part of my life again, so over the last few months I visited a few times and tried to forgive her.
The woman she married was very snarky with me, never really talking to me and always making remarks about my family. The kids were nice, but when she saw me playing with them she pulled them out of the room and didn’t let them go near me again.
A few days ago, my mum messaged me a list of presents each person would like (that being her, her wife, and the two kids) and told me they had a $50 minimum for each person.
I told her I was happy to get something small for the kids but there was no way I was spending a single cent on her wife. She called me and started screaming at me, saying she was my stepmother and I needed to stop being so mean to her. She then asked me if I would do that to my father, and I replied saying ‘No I wouldn’t, because he’s the parent I actually care about.’ I hung up on her and she sent me dozens of messages, calling me a selfish brat among other worse things.
I didn’t think I was in the wrong but some of my friends told me that she’s my mother and I need to get over myself and accept them as part of my family and now I’m not sure. AITJ?
35. AITJ For Having A Guest Stay Over At My House?
“I (34 M) have a 10-year-old daughter with my ex named Aubrey (34 F). Me and Aubrey were never married and split 8 years ago when Claire was 1.5 years old.
We have split custody and trade each Sunday. Just to provide context me and Aubrey dated for 2 years before she got pregnant. We decided to move in together but had very different lifestyle ideas.
Since we started going out she talked about being a stay-at-home mom. I told her countless times I didn’t want 1 income. Whenever our daughter was born we started fighting about her going back to nursing. She refused and said she didn’t want to work. Eventually, we split up after she said that I ‘wasn’t mature enough’ to handle a family.
But overall we do co-parent well. Like we do family dinners on Sundays and go on trips together. We even help each other with babysitting, sports team travel, and shopping.
We do a great job together and I think our daughter appreciates us being on each other’s team so much. I’d consider us good friends.
She started seeing someone a few months after we split and I met him whenever they moved in together. They dated for a few years and got engaged but have since separated and I was the one who helped her move out. Just trying to explain we are very good with each other typically.
For the last 2 weeks, Aubrey has been staying in my guest room.
Her house was getting some updates done and she asked to stay with me (she’s no longer with her fiance so she bought a new place). I let her and she told me to act like she wasn’t there and just do my thing. It was also more time with my daughter so I saw no issue with it.
My bedroom is attached to the back deck of my house. On Thursday I had a lady friend come over around 11 and stay the night and leave by 7. I’ve done this countless times with my daughter home and she’s never woken up. This lady friend specifically has been over multiple times in the last few months.
She’s a nurse at the same hospital as Aubrey so she works odd hours so this is normal.
I took Claire to a camp Friday morning and whenever I got home Aubrey was fuming. She said she heard my guest come in last night and was disgusted. Saying that I needed to set a better example for my daughter and how dangerous it was to sneak random people into my house.
I said she needed to check herself. As she is a guest and has no say in what I do in my home. She said other things that I can’t remember as I was starting to tune her out but finally said something about it being bad for my daughter. I said ‘You know what’s probably not good for Claire.
You moving her in with random dudes and then breaking up. I’m not moving her home anywhere like you have. I simply have a guest over and she’s never once noticed. So shut up with that.’
Aubrey then said something about how I needed to grow up. Aubrey and I have been staying away from each other.
And I’m thinking about asking her to get a hotel room as I’m done with her nonsense about this. I’m a grown-up man and can do what I want. AITJ?”
34. AITJ For Not Standing Up For My Partner Against A Man Who Was Yelling At Her?
“I am a 26-year-old man and I live with my 24-year-old partner, Sam. We’ve been cohabitating for eight months now and generally have a happy relationship.
I suppose if I had to say I disliked one thing about Sam, it’s that the ways she expresses her anger are incredibly juvenile. For example, if we’re outside together and something ticks her off, sometimes she’ll start rushing around nearly crashing into other people.
Sometimes she’ll do the opposite where she’ll walk incredibly slowly (think Tom Tucker from that Family Guy scene), or sometimes she’ll just stop dead in her tracks and refuse to move like a 3-year-old.
Last Thursday, we went to the grocery store together to get something for dinner. As we were walking around Sam saw a pair of microwave dinners that she thought looked nice.
I knew going into the conversation that she was likely to get upset, but every time I eat microwave dinners, I get an upset stomach. Since I had an in-person job interview the next day I really didn’t want to deal with abdominal cramps during the process.
I explained this to her and gave her some other options.
For example, I suggested I could make the Salisbury steak and mashed potatoes and do a great job at it seeing as I’m a pretty decent cook. She said no. She wanted those microwave dinners. So I tried another way: she could get the microwave dinner. I’d get something else. Again, no. She wanted to eat the same thing as me.
Finally, I just walked away because I couldn’t reason with her. She followed me with the two dinners in hand.
Instead of going to the checkout with her, I waited by the door. I had decided at this point that I just wasn’t going to have dinner. Sam walked up to the door, pulled out her phone, and froze.
People could not enter or leave the grocery store. I just kind of watched as a short line queued behind her. Finally, a rather large fellow lost his patience and squeezed past her, followed by yelling expletives at her about not blocking doors. During his 10-second tirade, Sam looked at me multiple times. I just shrugged in response.
Finally, Sam walked out and loudly asked why I didn’t stand up for her. I responded that she brought it upon herself. As she argued at me, a few people gave us curious glances and I believe a middle-aged woman shook her head at me. What she meant by that, I do not know.
Sam has barely said two words to me since.
I’ve tried talking to her but she demands an apology. Is she really deserving of one here?”
33. AITJ For Not Wanting To Have A Gender Reveal Party?
“I’m (26 F) currently pregnant. My husband (25 M) and I already have a 2-year-old daughter.
We had a gender reveal party for our first child.
My sister (24 F) was the host. She looked at my ultrasound report and planned the whole gender reveal party, so my husband and I did not know the gender of the baby until it was revealed at the party. Overall, I would say I did not enjoy the party because when my husband found out we were having a daughter, he had a sour look on his face and he got really quiet.
He tried to entertain our guests for a little while but eventually, he just said he had a headache and he went into our room to ‘rest’.
A few days ago my husband told me that he wanted another gender reveal party done the same way as the previous one. He contacted my sister without telling me and my sister was excited to plan it again.
I told him that I did not want to have a gender reveal party because I was afraid he would get quiet and moody again if he wasn’t pleased with the gender of the baby. I said we could just keep things lowkey and look at the report together at home, just the two of us, so that if he was disappointed we could talk things through properly.
My husband was understanding and he told me that he promised that he wouldn’t react the same way he did previously. I was still skeptical and I said I would still not prefer to have the party. He got angry at me and said that I didn’t trust him and I was being unreasonable etc. My sister came to know of our argument and suggested that my husband and I find out the gender of the baby prior to the party so that my husband could better keep his emotions in check but my husband refused, saying that it would spoil the fun.
So I put my foot down and told him, that we were not having a gender reveal party.
He’s extremely angry now because he said I wouldn’t even give him a chance and I’m assuming he would act a certain way based on our past experience. Honestly, I get where he’s coming from but I don’t want to risk it because the previous gender reveal party left me exhausted and extremely upset.
AITJ here?”
32. AITJ For Not Wanting To Celebrate My Mom And Her Husband's Anniversary?
“When I (21 M) was 14, my dad (49) found out that my mom (47) had an affair. Well, it was more like they reconnected because my dad knew I wasn’t his bio-son (he never said anything, and never treated me any differently) I didn’t know anything until he kicked her out of the house and told us everything.
My and my siblings’ (29 M, 29 F, 25 M, 19 F, 18 F) relationship with our mother became strained because we were so hurt by what she did to our dad. She ended up marrying her affair partner (AP). She literally forced me (my little sister was more into the idea) to go to this man’s house to ‘bond’.
When I saw him for the first time I remembered that my mom took me to him many times when I was a kid and he got me gifts and said we would be best friends, which made me dislike them more.
I was so mean to her and her husband so she stopped trying to force me when I was 16.
Everyone (my siblings) seemed to have forgiven my mom and even I did last year. We reconciled and agreed to build a better relationship (THE TWO OF US).
Her dude tried to send me funds for college but my dad rejected it, and so did I. My siblings already go to their house for special events but I haven’t in five years.
Their anniversary will be on 07/10 and they are planning a trip to celebrate. As my eldest siblings are busy with their own family life they decided to invite 25 M, me, and my little sisters. I told my mom I was not coming, then they two called me and he said that I’m his only child and I should be happy that ‘my real parents are together’.
I told them both to shut up and that I didn’t care about their life.
Everyone including my siblings is calling me a jerk for what I said and that I should go easy on him since he is trying to build a relationship with his only child and ‘heir’. Well everyone except my dad who supports me and seems somehow happy about what I told them.
My mom said that she was disappointed and that my ‘dad’ was hurt but I told her ‘What are you talking about? My dad is great and happy’.
AITJ for telling my mom and her husband (bio-dad) to shut up because I don’t care about their anniversary and life?”
31. AITJ For Not Committing To Taking Care Of My Dad's Stepkids When He And His Wife Die?
“I am the youngest of three brothers.
There’s me (20 m), my older brother (22 m), and my oldest brother (23 m). We lost our mom when we were small kids and our dad didn’t want to be a single dad forever, so he got married again to Janet. Janet had two of her own disabled children and her first husband had also died. When dad got married my brothers and I told him we weren’t ready and we felt it was too fast. He told us it was his decision, he was doing the best thing for all of us, and the benefits would outweigh any feelings being ‘too fast’.
But due to marrying someone with two disabled children we of course didn’t get this extra amazing life he was trying to paint for us.
What we got was needing to adjust our needs for theirs, missing out on stuff we wanted to do because those two kids needed full-time care, having much less money and also less time with the one parent we did have.
He was either working longer hours OR he was taking care of his stepkids so his wife could have a break. We also got less time with extended family because my dad said it wouldn’t be nice to show off all the people we had vs. his stepkids had, and we should be together ‘as a family’ as much as possible.
Now that we’re all adults they realize they need to figure out something for when the two of them are dead. Janet has no family support, her first husband’s family isn’t involved and our dad’s family is not super close to her kids. She and Dad expected me and my brothers to step up, be siblings, be family, for her kids, and agree to make sure they are okay when neither she nor my dad are alive.
None of us want to do it. None of us even stay in touch with our dad today. We’re out of the house and we make no effort because we lost him when he remarried. He remarried because he wanted a wife, not for our greater good. That much is clear.
They asked us and we said no. The tactic now is to divide and try and get one of us to break.
Dad has been reaching out and trying to say he knows I’m a good guy and must care about their wellbeing in some way. The guilt trip is getting to me a little. Especially when he talks about how messed up it is to leave vulnerable people with anyone. Not because I do care but I know his stepkids are innocent and have nobody else.
But I don’t feel the urge to do it even with that.
AITJ?”
30. WIBTJ If I Move Out Of Our Apartment Without Telling My Roommates?
“I moved into a shared apartment (three-people-apartment) in mid-March because I needed accommodation in a big, far away city for university. I used an app to search for shared apartments and finally found one that was very affordable considering the city and moved in.
I didn’t inspect the apartment beforehand because it was far away, and I really needed a room, so I just took it. Seemed a bit shabby but overall comfortable and okay.
Turns out: Even though they told me, there was no lease when I moved in. I was assured they’d take care of it. They never did.
They hid several things from me or purposely withheld information about the apartment (food moth infestation, very poor condition, my room hasn’t been cleaned in at least a month, mold, ongoing issues with the landlords and previous tenants…)
I’m unhappy with my roommates because they don’t respect boundaries and are controlling. I cannot change basic things, because person A can’t handle change.
Also, I get very odd vibes. They told me they only picked me because I’m hot. I feel bad for the dog of Person B. Person B smokes in their room and is vegan, their ill, old dog is also kept vegan. Dishes are literally molding because they’re not washing them (I wasn’t doing it because they weren’t mine, I was gone before, and when I wanted to person A stopped me).
Person B’s partner started staying here. First, we were told it was only temporary. Well – it’s not. They share a room. Also bad vibes. Never even see them.
Because things are kinda bad here, we planned to have a talk. This way last Wednesday. I was surprised to hear that they ALL plan to move out this summer.
They expect me to stay. We cannot give the apartment back to the landlord because the apartment would need to be in good condition, but repairing and renovating would be an enormous and expensive task (painting all the walls! fixing all the lights!). Finding new tenants is next to impossible without fooling them.
So I panicked because if I ended up with the apartment alone this would ruin me.
I found a new shared apartment in a different city (a friend of mine is the only roommate), met the landlord, and rented a car. Currently staying at my friend’s house/my new home, lied to my roommates about just visiting my friend. I’m planning to pull up tomorrow without warning, throw everything into the car and leave.
I am not breaking contact.
I never signed or received a lease, nor paid a security deposit, so I will simply stop paying rent after this and will not supply a new tenant or help with that.
I am aware that this will mean they’ll have a lot more stress, and higher rents, and it’ll be a shock.
They are all having a bad time right now (+ mentally ill and neurodivergent) and I just got informed that Person B’s dog died (illness).
WIBTJ if I went through with this?”
29. AITJ For Not Forcing My Kids To Spend Weekends With Their Dad?
“I (45 f) am divorced from my ex-husband. We were married 12 years, and have been divorced for 8.
We have three kids, 17, 15, and 13. He is remarried with two stepkids who live with him and his wife. My kids are very close with their step-siblings (17 and 14).
Our goal was to split 50/50 but no specific parenting time guideline was built into our decree. Over time, as the kids got older, more involved with school and friend activities, and he got remarried and his home dynamic changed, it has been easier to shift to most parenting time with me.
As of now, our schedule involves them with him every other weekend.
The kids don’t have a ton of respect for their dad, and their dad doesn’t have the foggiest idea of how to approach that with reason and understanding, so he just gets angrier and demands more respect from them, which ends up with the opposite effect.
My ex and his wife think I let the kids make too many choices and have too much control. I’ll admit, I don’t dictate too much. They are expected to do their laundry, manage their schoolwork, pick up after themselves, and help out with what I ask them to do. They do that without issue.
At their dad’s house, the chore regimen is much stricter and apparently confusing, and the kids think they are being set up to be found failing and get into trouble. When they start to voice this, the adults consider them insubordinate, and it escalates from there.
I’ll be honest, I have tried to dig into what is causing the drama, and my kids sound pretty convincing, but I know they see their own perspective and not likely the adults’.
They tell me they consider their dad manipulative and emotionally abusive, but I don’t know how much of that is realistic versus just frustrated teenagers.
This weekend was my kids’ weekend with their dad, and they didn’t want to go. I was able to convince them to go for Friday night and was hopeful the weekend would go well and they’d stay the weekend.
By 3:00 Saturday, they were asking to come home. I have not been able to discern any specific reason, just that the environment over there was uncomfortable. My ex ended up bringing them back to my house, but he told me in the future I need to tell them they are not welcome in my house on their weekend with him.
I told him I would unequivocally not tell them that. I said I always encourage a positive relationship with their dad, but if things aren’t going well and fights are ensuing, my place is always available as a safe haven for them. He said fine, he’d take me to court for not upholding the 50/50 guideline.
(Our decree merely states joint, no percentage guidelines listed, but I agree our agreement was 50/50, and my intention would be to support that except for my kids having such a strained relationship with him.)
I’m not asking from a legal perspective, but simply from a jerk one. AITJ if I don’t force the kids to spend weekends with him when they don’t want to?”
28. AITJ For Not Wanting To Come To My Sister-In-Law's Wedding Unless She Owns Up Her To Her Hurtful Actions?
“I (26 F) just got married to my husband (25 M) last month. We both felt like it was extremely important to include our siblings in our wedding party.
All three of my sisters were bridesmaids, and so were my husband’s two sisters. My brother was a groomsman. We made sure our wedding party had all the dates for the wedding activities well in advance. We told our wedding party almost immediately after we booked our venue what the date of the wedding and rehearsal dinner would be, nearly a year and a half in advance.
My sister-in-law/bridesmaid did not attend our rehearsal dinner because it was her anniversary. Not only did she choose not to attend, but she never told me or my husband (her brother). She showed up for rehearsal, and my husband and I even stopped by her car in the parking lot to ask if she had the address for the restaurant and she said, ‘Yep, we’re good!’ When we got to the restaurant for dinner my husband waited outside for everyone to show up, but his sister never showed.
My husband and I were both pretty upset and even woke up in the middle of the night before our wedding because we were so bothered that his sister didn’t attend our rehearsal dinner. We even considered kicking her out of the wedding party, but decided we would probably regret it later. She called my husband the morning of the wedding to ask him a question and my husband asked her if they could talk about last night (the rehearsal dinner).
She said, ‘What about last night?’ She tried to turn it around on us and said that she told us multiple times she wouldn’t be attending our rehearsal dinner. She asked if she needed to apologize to me, the bride, and my husband said, ‘Apologies are definitely in order, but not on our wedding day.’
A week after our wedding we still hadn’t heard from her so we contacted her and asked if we could sit down and talk about what happened. She at first refused to answer our messages until we got my mother-in-law involved, then she replied to my husband and said that he had said ‘disgusting and unforgivable things’ to her the morning of our wedding and she was not comfortable putting herself in that situation again.
She brushed off our rehearsal dinner and once again turned it back around on us and refused to apologize. We were extremely confused, as my husband felt that he had actually let her off too easily during their phone call, but we said okay, contact us when you are ready to talk.
Now it’s been a month since the wedding, and we sent another message asking to meet with her so that we could resolve things before the upcoming holidays.
Her response was more of the same: placing the blame on us, and refusing to meet or apologize. My husband and I have decided we will not attend her wedding next year if she cannot take ownership of her hurtful actions and apologize. Are we the jerks?”
27. AITJ For Not Wanting To Be Responsible For Taking Care Of My Grandma?
“I (25 f) have been in minimal contact with my family for the past year and a half. My dad wasn’t in the picture growing up so his side was never there but my maternal grandparents (72 f + 77 m) raised me from age 6. I was living with them up until I bought my house at 23 and cut most contact once I was fully moved out.
Last week I decided to take my grandparents out to lunch at a nearby pizza place since I will be out of the country for Thanksgiving and Christmas, one of the only times I will speak to them. We were talking about some changes I’ve made to my house when Grandma mentioned that, when my grandfather inevitably passes, they have it put in some sort of legal document that I will be in charge of her care if she is unable to care for herself.
She said that I shouldn’t make plans to stay in my house for long, as I’ll need space for her and my future kids. (I am not planning on having children)
I asked her why they assumed that I would agree to her living with me when her children (47, 45, 40, 38) are perfectly capable of housing and caring for her.
She said that they housed and took care of me for 17 years of my life so me taking care of her for probably 10 shouldn’t be that bad of a trade. I told them that there was no way that I was taking that responsibility and they started telling me that I am heartless and cruel to turn away a family member.
I paid for lunch, told them that the only place she was going if I was in charge would be a retirement home, and left. I’ve since had my inbox graced with angry voicemails, emails, and a literal physical letter at my workplace from one of their kids calling me a jerk. I know I should be standing up for myself but I might’ve overdone it in this circumstance.
AITJ?
Edit: We do NOT have a good base relationship. I have a slightly better relationship with my grandfather but even then it’s questionable at best. Also, my mother was unable to raise me, which is why they took me.”
26. AITJ For Refusing To Pay For My Daughter's Birthday Party?
“My ex-husband Leo (M) and I (F) had two children together, (13 F – Penny – and 11 M).
We broke up 7 years ago. Leo had another daughter with his wife (3 F – his daughter).
One of the arrangements between me and Leo is that on our children’s birthday, I would be responsible for the gifts and he for the party, getting the same value (it’s not big, just food, drink and cake for 10 guests at most and we meet at the house of my ex-mother-in-law).
Next Friday will be Penny’s birthday and this year she asked for a gift of books. As I managed to save that money before, I took her, and she had a party at the bookstore (on Wednesday).
She asked Leo if he could have a bowling party and she would invite some friends, it would be a little more expensive but I offered to pay half so it wouldn’t be so heavy he said he couldn’t pay more, because he would have the party of his daughter too (who was on Thursday).
Penny was pretty upset, but she got over it.
Today, he texted me saying he had an unforeseen expense and couldn’t pay for Penny’s party. Unforeseen events happen, and that’s okay, but the fact that the other daughter had a huge party on Thursday (with a venue, princesses, and everything in excess) and our daughter went and saw it… He said he didn’t have the budget for a party that doesn’t cost 1/10 of the cost of this other party, which made my blood boil.
He asked if I could ‘fix’ the situation and tried to explain that he had no money and was in a tight situation. He couldn’t do that because today he had a migraine.
I said he’ll have to tell his daughter that he spent 10x the amount he spent on her birthday on his other daughter and there’s nothing left to throw her a party.
And that he must learn to take his problems without me having to solve them.
He tried to argue that he and his wife split the expenses, but just no. When he saw that I would not give in, he tried to convince me to pay for the party and then he would return it to me (I can’t without committing for the month) and it didn’t work.
He started saying that I’d rather Penny get hurt by a situation that happens (‘unforeseen circumstances’) to teach him a lesson.
He talked to Penny and the result was not good. She was very upset.
I talked to her, proposed to do something cheaper, and explained that my budget was lower. She brightened up a little, but she was still resentful of her father and didn’t want him to go to her party.
Obviously, she realized that her father had the budget to throw a huge party for the other daughter and he didn’t have the budget for her, so she was upset.
My ex and ex-MIL are calling me a jerk because of all of this.
AITJ?”
25. AITJ For Moving Out Of My In-Laws' House?
“So I’ve been married for 2.5 years now.
In the first year of marriage, I was living with my husband’s family. We were contributing to the rent (pre-defined share).
Now I really like his family. They’re very nice people. He has a brother and sister along with his parents. I’m very open with his mom too.
However, I just couldn’t stand living in the same house after a point because I felt like I had absolutely no privacy.
Some examples,
– His mom and sister would just barge into our bedroom and use my makeup without my permission. I KNOW their intent wasn’t malicious but it just made me extremely uncomfortable.
– His sister would just wear my clothes straight out of my wardrobe and I’d sometimes not find them again.
– I have a specific hair type and I spend a lot on expensive hair products to maintain my hair.
They would end up using my shampoos etc. since the bathroom was common.
– His mom would expect me to cook in the kitchen after my work shift. This was not expected from the brother or my husband. The brother was unemployed and at home all day.
– I liked to order my meals from outside and if they noticed That my husband and I were doing that, they would be offended that we didn’t order for EVERYONE.
We don’t earn enough to order food for all 4 of them plus ourselves. But the taunts would be there.
I couldn’t directly tell them how I felt because it would severely offend his mother and cause friction. I let it go on for long until I couldn’t anymore and so we decided to move out because I reassured my husband that we would manage (he lived with his family his entire life).
His mom was upset but she eventually understood I guess?
But now, she casually brings up the topic of how I separated her from her son and how I stole him away. It bothers me and makes me wonder if I am the jerk?”
24. AITJ For Proving To My Partner's Mom That I Don't Like Ravioli?
“My partner and I have been together for 4 years. In year 1 we were both broke and 19 and living with his parents. His mom is a neat freak, which is fine so is my mom I’m used to it. So I’d always clean up after myself and always found myself cleaning up after the other several people that lived there also.
Well one day on a sunny summer afternoon, she comes and starts cleaning our room. We shared a room with a divider with one of his brothers. MIL finds a Tupperware container of moldy ravioli (it’s important to mention this was not on our side of the room, I never went on that side and worked 14-hour days so was rarely even home.
Pretty much a sleeping spot).
She turns to me and starts screaming at me for leaving the ravioli there. I told her it was not mine and she continued to yell at me that I was a lazy liar who couldn’t pick up after myself and that she hated that her son chose me and just kept going on and on about how it was my ravioli.
I told her ‘Jennifer, I don’t even like ravioli’. She started yelling that I was a lying jerk etc etc. This time I didn’t say anything. I didn’t even argue. I just pulled my phone out and called my mom and put it on speakerphone. The conversation went like this:
Mom – Hello
Me – Hi Mom, do I like ravioli?
Mom – What? Why would you call me to ask such a dumb question?
Me – Mom. Please just answer the question. Do I like ravioli?
Mom – No, you hate it. Even as a child, you refused to eat it because you said the taste and texture were gross.
Me – Thanks Mom, that’s all I needed.
I then hung up the call. Jennifer’s face was red and started screaming at me that my mom and I probably planned it.
Right at that moment, my oldest BIL came into the room and was like, What are you guys arguing, ‘Oh that’s where my Tupperware is, I’ve been looking for that. My bad accidentally left it in here’.
Jennifer didn’t apologize, didn’t fight with him over the ravioli, just never brought it up again. Till yesterday. We were visiting and someone was making ravioli and said ‘Better not let OP be in charge of it’. I asked what they meant and then this whole thing has been an argument again.
So, AITJ?”
23. AITJ For Being Late To My Mom's Doctor's Appointment?
“My mom (47 F) found out a few weeks ago that she might have Thyroid Cancer, so she got a medical appointment for today at 1 PM to find out if it is what it seems. I (16 M) go to the gym every day from Monday to Friday, around the same time she had her appointment.
Yesterday we talked about how we’d manage to go together since I go to the gym at the same time. After some ideas and talking we agreed that I’d wake up sooner and go to the gym sooner so that I’d be back home in time.
Today, I woke up at the time we decided (8 am) had breakfast, and went to the gym (~10.30 am).
A few exercises in, and she called me out of nowhere to ask where am I, then I noticed I was a bit late, no big deal we agreed that I’d finish my workout in the evening,
On my way home I realized I wouldn’t have time to get home, take a shower, and get dressed (I was wearing a regular T-shirt and pants), so I called her to ask where we could meet on the way to the doctor’s appointment so it’d be easier and we’d be there in time, she exploded saying: ‘If you were to come with me dressed in gym clothes you might as well just stay at the gym’.
I replied with ‘It’s not the perfect outfit but we don’t have time, I’ll go with yo-‘ And before I could even finish she just hung up. After that, she stopped replying to my calls and texts for almost 20 minutes. After I got home, I spent some time trying to make sense of what had just happened, I was really mad about it, and then texted her asking where is the clinic she was headed to.
She replied with: ‘Because of actions like these I rather go alone, and I’m going alone.’ ‘I only have help when it’s useful for others’.
I tried telling her that we had no time to get home and get dressed and stuff, but she just kept going on and on, saying stuff like: ‘You didn’t want to go because you care more about your workout than me.’ ‘Don’t try to blame me, because you didn’t want to go, now live with that’.
She still mad and disappointed at me, AITJ?”
22. AITJ For Painting My Man Cave With Dark Gray Color?
“Recently my (51 m) and my wife’s (49 f) last child moved out of our house. We have three kids; 26 f, 24 f, and 21 m.
When our oldest daughter moved out we turned her room into a guest bedroom. When our middle daughter moved out my wife turned her room into a sewing and crafts room. When our son moved out I told my wife that I would be turning his room into my own little personal man cave; a room for gaming and watching sports and streaming services.
I remember her rolling her eyes and saying ‘Whatever, hon. Have fun with your new little man cave’ in a laughing, good-natured way.
So, a few days ago I took the day off work because I wanted to spend the day converting my new man cave. I went to Menards and bought samples of a few colors that were within what I wanted. After taking them home and trying them out on the wall I settled on one and went and bought a couple of cans of that color.
I then went to work painting the room that color.
When my wife came home and saw what I was doing she – much to my surprise – became irate. She demanded to know what I was doing to ‘our son’s room.’ I told her that I didn’t like the weird mint green color.
She said that she and our son had picked it out together and painted the room that color together. I told her that was fine, but it wasn’t his room anymore and that I had my own preferences for my now-man cave. She said that the dark gray color I was painting was ‘ugly, dark, and depressing.’ I told her that her opinion didn’t matter because it was now my room, just like she had our daughter’s former bedroom as HER sewing and crafts room.
She insists that because the room is in our house she should have some say over the color even if it’s my ‘man cave’ and that I shouldn’t have painted it without her saying so. I insist that since she will basically never go in there she shouldn’t care. Who’s right?”
21. AITJ For Not Opening The Door For A Parent Whose Child I Used To Babysit?
“I (30 F) am married to a wonderful man. I also have OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder).
I met my husband when I was 19 and we got together, 2 years later I had a traumatic event that triggered my OCD and left me unable to provide for myself.
My husband (then my significant other) moved me in with him and provided for me.
This man spent more than 3 years unable to sit on the sofa in his own home, not having the freedom to just eat whatever he wanted because of my disorder, and having to take a shower under my supervision before we could be intimate.
I am pretty sure that no one else would have gone through that misery with me.
I am now doing better but I still have to have the house organized and cleaned a certain way. What that means is that looking from the outside we seem to have a 50s style relationship. He makes the money and I take care of the house.
Mentally I can’t handle the idea of getting pregnant, and a surrogate is out of the question because of my OCD. We are going to adopt but it is a lengthy process. In the meantime -and because I like kids – I volunteered to babysit a single mother’s son.
She drops him with me at 6:30 a.m. and picks him up at 7 p.m. I drive him to and from school, make him snacks, take him to the park… etc. and now that it is summer he spends the day with me.
I do it for $100 a week.
The problem I have with this woman is her remarks. She keeps disparaging my husband for not doing any housework, or gossiping about me being a ‘battered wife’ to other neighbors. Which is 100% lies. I asked her again and again to stop.
This last week was the last straw, so when she picked up her kid on Thursday I told her that Friday would be the last time I will be babysitting him.
She tried to argue but I said it was final.
Yesterday she dropped by my house a 6:30 a.m. like usual but I didn’t open the door nor answer the phone. She gave up after a bit and just left.
I met her by chance a couple of hours ago and she went off on me, about how she had to call off last minute, how she can’t find someone to take care of the kid… etc.
I said: That seems more of a you-problem than a me-problem.
But now I have cooled down and am feeling like a jerk for not at least giving her a week to look for someone else.
Edit: I was the one that asked for $100. It was mainly for snacks for the kid and to help with gas.
I watched the kid mainly because I love kids (would have been a teacher if not for my disability) and because it helps me get used to having kids around the house for when we finally adopt.
I am working with therapists, I am better and I absolutely can tolerate mess. I have been babysitting for up to 3 years now and have no problem with kids making messes (well not true, but I learned how to deal with it).
When I said as long as it is limited to a playroom I meant the big messes. I have never had complaints from people I babysat for (from 6-month-old babies to 12-year-old kids).”
20. AITJ For Calling My Partner's Ex When He Left His Son With Me?
“I (26 F) have been with Marcus (30 M) for 4 months. He has an 11-month-old son from his former relationship. I only saw this baby twice, because I don’t like children and his mother has already expressed several times that she doesn’t feel comfortable with me seeing her baby because she doesn’t know me and doesn’t trust me (I don’t judge her for that).
Both times I met him, it was by chance on the street while Marcus and I were together, and found the mother/grandmother on the street with the baby (yes, it was super weird).
And before you ask, we don’t consider being together, although we are currently exclusive, we are just friends with benefits who are too lazy to meet other people and we are comfortable with each other.
We never sleep at each other’s house and only meet in the middle of the week, as he has guard over the baby’s weekends.
Saturday afternoon, Marcus showed up at home with his son and said he needed help because there was an emergency in the family and he needed to go to the city where they live and it wouldn’t be possible to go with the baby (2 hours away).
The mother and maternal grandparents had traveled.
He didn’t even allow me an answer, he just gave me the baby and the bag with everything and left.
I tried calling, and texting, but he just told me to suck It up for a few hours and then he would reward me because it was an emergency.
I don’t know how to take care of babies, I really don’t feel comfortable and he knows that very well. After several times telling him to come back because I didn’t want to be responsible for taking care of the baby, he just hung up his cell.
I thought about calling the police, but I decided to text the baby’s mother (Instagram), telling her the situation.
His godmother showed up not even 10 minutes to pick him up.
At night, Marcus came home yelling that I caused a huge mess since he asked for a favor because of an emergency and I was the only one who ‘accepted’ (the others couldn’t). And that I caused an unnecessary problem with his custody since the mother would file a request for a review.
Obviously, we’re ‘done’. I would like an opinion from the outside, some friends sided with me, others did not.
AITJ?”
19. AITJ For Calling My Apathetic Teacher A Piece Of Work?
“I (16 F) am a high school student.
This year, I took 3 AP level courses, including AP Bio. I was doing great for the first few months, and my teacher (40 M) and I got along really well.
However, my best friend’s mom and dad passed away very suddenly in late September and it emotionally wrecked me. They were like my second family, and I was really upset.
I had to miss my biology class to go to their celebration of life and I got excused to leave by my mom (important). As per school policy, any person who has an excused absence gets an extra day of work without a late deduction. Up to this point, I had been on top of everything and had an A in the class.
I got all my online work done by the next day and sent an email to my teacher that I had completed the work.
Fast-forward and I go to check my grade, only to see that it’s tanked from an A to a low B because the assignments had been marked as 0’s. I go up to his classroom to talk with him, and he says that I wasn’t excused from his class.
I asked him to please check the attendance portal to see that I had in fact been excused, and he told me he didn’t care and that whatever excuse I had didn’t matter. I told him very bluntly that the reason I missed the work was because my best friend’s parents passed away, and I was at their celebration of life.
He proceeded to basically tell me ‘That sucks LOL but you still have to do your work.’ I tell him I did do the work and turned it in, and he point blank tells me I’m lying.
He never updated those grades, despite having the dean confirm that I was excused. I ended up getting a B and had to work twice as hard to bring up my overall grade to an A.
He treated me like trash for the rest of the year, accused me of being dishonest, was outright misogynistic to me, and refused to help me with any questions about the class. He also told my mom that I was ‘hostile and aggressive’ and accused me of creating a narrative that he was out to get me.
He also messed with my grades a lot (nothing I could really prove) and I barely scraped by with an A.
He pulled me aside at the end of the year and asked me why I’d had such an issue with him the entire year. I told him everything I said in this story, and he basically said none of it had ever happened and I was being dramatic, and that a friend’s parents passing away ‘isn’t grounds for borderline truancy’.
I looked him in the eye and told him that he was a piece of work who had no human empathy for anyone and walked out.
I told some friends and they said I was a jerk for saying that and I could’ve been more polite and just let it go. I feel like I might’ve been a little mean, but he was also awful to me for 6 months over 2 assignments.
AITJ?
EDIT: H said extremely misogynist things to me including that I don’t belong in STEM if I can’t get my emotions in check, just like most women (right after a funeral LOL?). Yeah maybe it’s mean to call people names but he treated me like human garbage over 2 missing assignments. He also preached understanding people’s circumstances and passed his bad behavior off to other students by saying his wife was pregnant so he was struggling.
That’s partially why my friends said I was out of line.”
18. AITJ For Not Wanting To Give My Mom A Gift Together With My Brother?
“My (30 F) mother’s 60th birthday is coming up soon. I plan for birthdays well in advance, making sure I put funds aside to buy people I love something nice.
Because this is a big one, I’ve been saving up for quite some time (I don’t make a lot of money). I bought my mom a beautiful gold necklace that I am positive she will love.
My brother (27 M) is terrible with birthdays, so I often call him in advance to remind him of birthdays and things like Father’s Day and Mother’s Day.
Sometimes I send him gift ideas, as well. He called me the other day to ask whether I already had a present for Mom. I told him I did and he asked whether we could say it’s from both of us. Now I know that my brother is terrible with birthdays, which is fine. In the past, he’s paid me half and we did indeed say it was from the both of us.
This present I just don’t feel like sharing though. I saved up for it especially and had it custom-made. I called my brother about a month ago to remind him mom’s birthday is coming up and he still didn’t manage to remember to buy something. So I told him no.
He offered to pay me back half, but I still refused. He flipped out, telling me I just want the praise all to myself, how it’s about the gift and not the gift giver, how I’m going to make him look bad, etc. When I think about it, he’s kind of right.
I do want my mom’s praise and gratitude for me.
Am I being selfish here? I mean, whether she receives the present from just me or from both of us doesn’t really matter does it? Then why does it rub me the wrong way to share this with him? AITJ?”
17. AITJ For Sending My Mom To A Psychiatric Ward?
“I (19 F) have an apartment with my significant other (22 M). My mom moved in recently due to housing issues with her credit.
At our previous place, Mom’s friend stayed for a week, the house became infested with bed bugs.
I threw away everything I owned. We were able to treat it, my cousin was taking over the lease and knew of the issue. Mom didn’t tell us when they were moving in, they showed up one day, and then it was sprung on all of us. With no housing in place, my SO and I stayed at families’ houses until I got approved.
Fast forward to a month or so, and Mom asked to stay with us, her housing situation crashed so I said okay. A month later, she asked me if she could move in some of her stuff. SOME. I asked her if she bombed and cleaned her clothes yet (in a storage unit) she said she did.
I told her I only accepted clothes and a small amount of personal items. She used to have a house, I have a tiny apartment, no way all her stuff would fit in my house.
A few weeks ago, my cousin pulled up with a trailer, filled with literally everything she owned. I explained to her immediately how I felt, but I don’t have much of a backbone when it comes to my mother.
I allowed it. She said she’d rearrange it so we could access our kitchen. Never did.
Two days ago, I got off work and came home. Mom was smoking inside. I told her to go outside. Didn’t care if it was snowing, one of my rules with her moving in was no smoking inside my home.
She tried saying something but I just opened the door for her.
Last night I was going through some of her stuff (which was mine, she had all my books safely stored away with the rest of her collection) I lifted a book, and bed bugs scattered out of the box. I screamed and cried. Mom heard everything.
I started yelling at her, saying how could she do this to me! She tried saying that it wasn’t a big deal, we could bomb and let it go. I told her it was a big deal, because of her friend I had thrown away nearly all my belongings.
My SO woke up and asked what happened. That’s when mom took it upon herself to scream that I was bullying her, that I needed psychotic help.
I yelled at her to get out. Mom proceeded to hit herself, saying if I made her leave, she’d call the police & have my SO arrested for battery.
I called the police anyhow, told them the situation, and showed them my lease, only me and my SO were on there, and I felt scared for not only my safety but my SO’s as well.
I’d like her removed. They brought her to Valle Vista, she was showing psychotic episodes.
Since then, my entire family has been calling me, berating me for picking a man over blood. My SO said I didn’t do anything wrong, and he’s grateful I stood up for him, but I don’t know if it’s because of the toxic relationship we have, and I’m always used to bailing my mom out, I feel bad from what my family is saying.
Did I really do the wrong thing?”
16. AITJ For Causing A School Bus Driver To Get Fired?
“I (22 f) have a 4-year-old brother who goes to an early education school to help with his delay in the mental and verbal process.
He rides the bus and normally I have to put him on the bus since my mom has to work. With the global crisis, if there is any case at his school they’ll close for some time. During one of those times, I ended up in a leg cast and crutches. My mom notified the school of my accident and said he may show up a bit later for the bus.
His bus stops in front of my house at the end of the driveway. With the cast on it’s not as easy and kinda hurts to go up and down the driveway and I’m stuck like this for a while. So I asked my significant other to do it since he has been with me to put him on and off the bus multiple times in the past and the driver even made small talk with him man to man.
Well, today he was supposed to put him on the bus and I stood on the porch watching him take him but he didn’t get in. They stood there for some time before the driver took off and they walked back. I asked WHAT?! And he said since the driver didn’t recognize him he didn’t feel uncomfortable taking my brother even though I was standing there in full view with my bright pink cast. He wanted my brother’s legal guardians to be the ones to do it.
I ended up calling my mom and explaining what happened. She ended up calling the school and complained.
After a few days, we were given an apology and a report of the situation. He essentially was fired because he felt it was a good idea to leave a student alone with someone he identified as a stranger rather than taking the student and reporting it to the school.
Later my friends called me a jerk because I got him fired when I could’ve just swallowed the pain and taken the time to walk him there like an adult.”
15. AITJ For Calling My Stepfather "Dad" In Front Of My Grandma?
“My biological parents got divorced when I (17 f) was about 2 years old. My older sister (21 f) and I visited him on the weekends and spent parts of our summers with him and his family until he unexpectedly passed away when I was in fifth grade.
My mother got remarried to my stepfather ‘Jacob’ when I was in second grade.
He has really been a big part of my life, even before the death of my father. I’m not really sure what a typical 17-year-old girl’s relationship with her father looks like so I don’t really know how to compare it, but he’s always been there for me and he’s clearly a father figure for me.
I used to just call him Jacob. The first time I called him ‘Dad’ I was in eighth grade, and it was actually an accident. It kind of just slipped out. He was really moved by it and paused our conversation to hug me and tell me how much he loved me. I’ve been calling him Dad ever since.
My relationship with my father’s mother has been a lot weaker since his death. With that and the global crisis and everything, I hadn’t really seen her in years before this week. She was in my city to see a show and stopped by for dinner. It was a little awkward, but it was going pretty well until I said ‘Dad, can you pass the broccoli?’
My grandmother started crying. She tried to hide it and we got through the dinner, but I could tell she was really hurt by it. When she was leaving and saying goodbye to us, she told me that she was disappointed in me for basically taking a dump on my father’s memory and effectively ‘replacing him’ with Jacob.
I’ve been feeling really bad about it. I lost my father, but she lost her son and I feel awful for referring to someone else as ‘Dad’ in front of her. So, AITJ?”
14. AITJ For Telling My Partner's Mom She Should Be A Loving And Caring Mother First?
“I (25 F) have been with my partner (27 M) for almost a year now. He had a quite rough childhood. His dad died when he was 6 and his mom remarried a year after that and basically acted like he wasn’t her kid anymore.
When he was 10 he went to live with his grandparents. He said his mom basically started a new life with the new husband and his kids. They tried to have kids but failed, and when he was around 14-15 the guy left his mom for another woman. After that, she started to come back to his life.
She was part of it before but not so much, and the relationship was damaged.
My partner does love her. In the end, it is still his mom but he resents her a bit for how she was. I had an amazing mom. I love my mom with all my heart and I owe her everything I am.
She and my dad have been together since they were 17 and they’re now in their 50s. My parents also live in my home country and I live in America. I pretty much support my parents and everything they need.
For Mother’s Day, my partner’s grandma decided to have a get-together to celebrate the moms in the family and they invited me.
I have only met his mom like 3 times and never really chatted with her. There was her, my partner, his grandma, one of his aunts, and her husband all talking while the rest were around and his mom asked me about my mom. I said she lived back home and asked me what did I get her.
I told her I got it a spa day and a whole thing included a salon, nails, hair, etc. so she could go have dinner at her favorite restaurant with my dad I also paid for, and some money for her to buy other things. She said something like, Wow I went all in and it must be nice to have a kid that loves you so much, how lucky my mom was, that I was such a grateful daughter that takes care of her and spoils her, and how she will never get that.
I said my mom’s hard work is paying off, that in order for you to get kids that love you and care about you, you must be a loving and caring mother and that you reap what you sow.
Her face went blank and left pretty much right after that. Everyone said that I was right and she should have seen that coming.
My partner actually thanked me since he has never been able to stand up for himself to her and that was kinda what made me say something but she messaged him saying how I was rude and ruined Mother’s Day for her.
I talked to my mom about it and she told me that is the consequences of her actions but maybe I could have just let it go since it was her day, so I don’t know, AITJ?”
13. AITJ For Complaining About A Waitress?
“I (41 F) have MS & have severe mobility issues. My (41 M) partner ‘Greg’ is a wonderful caregiver & helps me a lot.
On Easter weekend my (60 F) mom came to town (she lives in another state). After she got settled in she stated that she was hungry & she named a local diner because she was craving one of their specialty burgers.
So, I called the restaurant & ‘Betsy’ answered the call. I placed my order (it was 4 hamburgers, but each was ordered with different toppings) and Greg picked up the order (with it being a 45-minute drive roundtrip).
As we started to unpack our food, 3 of the 4 orders were jacked up. Not just a little. A lot.
I called the diner back & I got Betsy again. While I am in the middle of a sentence, Betsy tells me well I don’t know what you want me to do. It’s Lent & we are busy. Bad things happen. Now I am mad because at this point it’s a little about the food but more importantly her attitude.
You can jack up my food or be rude, but not both! I told her I would like a partial refund & she told me good luck with that because she already told me she was busy. I told her that sounded like a me-problem & although I understood they were busy, I wanted what I paid for, or to refund me.
At this point she calls me a choice name and hang up on me.
I called back & this time ‘Jessica’ answered the phone. She was very professional & helped calm me down. She said that I had to bring the food back in personally or I couldn’t get a refund. I advised her not only of my mobility issues & travel time but that for safety reasons she couldn’t take back the food (or at least the restaurants I worked at in the past couldn’t) but I agreed and poor Greg made the trip back to the diner to get my refund (I just couldn’t make it).
When he arrived, he stated that Jessica did indeed give him the refund, but Betsy came from the kitchen with like 5 members of the kitchen staff & started talking smack to him. She said stuff like he better watch his mouth, or he would get jumped. He felt unsafe so he just got out of dodge, and told me about it.
I immediately called back & asked to speak to the manager, but – you guessed it – Betsy answered the phone & refused to give me the supervisor’s name. So, I waited 2 weeks then called back, changed my voice, and said that I wanted to write a compliment letter for her & who I should address it to and she gave me the sup’s name.
I wrote him a detailed letter of my experience, what happened with whom (I spoke highly of Jessica & told him how horrible Betsy was). I told him we no longer feel safe and won’t be a customer there anymore. Today the owner called me & said that this wasn’t the first time someone had complained about her, but it was going to be the last. He talked to the staff and after they confirmed what I said actually happened he decided to let her go.
A tiny, tiny piece of me feels bad that she lost her job, but the other 99% feels she was super unprofessional and got what she deserved. So, AITJ?”
12. AITJ For Giving My Son More Allowance For A Class Trip?
“My husband and I have 7 kids (17 f, 16 m, 14 f, 13 m and 13 f, 11 f and 10 m).
In our house, we give our kids an allowance (each gets the same amount) and they can do more by doing chores. My 13-year-old son by far does the vast majority of chores. He works hard around the house, from laundry to clearing his room to cleaning various other rooms and more. Sometimes my son’s friends help him and I’ve heard he helps at their houses, his friend group are all such good influences on each other, I love those boys.
My other kids are not bad or misbehaved by any means, my children are pretty nice kids, but the other ones don’t do much around the house. I’ve even offered to up the money, but they don’t care, only my son does. We are very, very well off but don’t believe in spoiling our kids.
We obviously get them some of what they want, but if they want more they got to work for it. My 13-year-old hates not being able to get what he wants, so he works for it. A few times if there’s a really big ticket item that he sees somewhere he may not be able to get again, we’ll buy it and have him work off some of the price.
He loves collecting antique sports memorabilia, seeing his face every time he’s shopping in the antique store for memorabilia is priceless. He’s definitely my shopper.
My 13-year-old son and daughter are going to DC for their 7th-grade class trip, over the past few weeks, I’ve noticed him doing stuff that isn’t even on our chore list, and he insisted he wasn’t paid for it.
My son is somewhat into politics compared to our other kids, he’s very progressive and my husband and I rarely agree with him on politics, but we know he just wants what he thinks is best for everyone. I gave my daughter $200 in spending money and my son got $325. Any other money, they needed to use from what they previously had, they have safe wallets and credit cards I can track.
My daughter found out I gave him more and is upset, I feel like 1. He earned it, he’s constantly doing housework, 2. My daughter couldn’t care less about politics, my son cares somewhat, mainly due to athletes he admires talking about politics, 3. While we live in a wealthy area and my kids’ friends are also very well off, most kids in the US aren’t as well off as us and she should be grateful for what she gets.
She also has her money from allowances and birthdays.
She’s upset and claiming he’s the favorite, I deal with the finances, and my husband has been hesitant to say anything because he doesn’t really look at the finances. He also is the ‘good cop’ and has a hard time dealing with conflict (part of the reason he doesn’t want to handle finances is he doesn’t like fighting over stuff, he’s a sweetheart, and I try giving him more control since I don’t want to be a controlling wife), but since he doesn’t want to have an opinion, that just leaves her mad at me.
Am I being a jerk or am I in the right?”
11. AITJ For Not Coming Inside The Hospital To Support My Roommate?
“I have shared a 2 bedroom apartment with Abby for almost a year now.
A few weeks back, I woke up due to a loud noise.
Abby came back from a party, she was wasted and she was wearing heels. She fell down, hit her head on the table, and started bleeding.
I went to check on her. The wound wasn’t serious but it definitely required stitches and was bleeding. I called an ambulance but did not go with her.
Here is the thing.
I hate hospitals. If it is something serious, I will prepare myself and go. I lost 5 members including my parents in a span of 1.5 years due to different illnesses. Sometimes it felt like I was practically living there. So, right now, I would like to stay away from hospitals as much as possible.
I called after some time to check up on her.
She told me that they were making her stay for a few hours as she was wasted and also to keep her under observation. I asked her if she needed me to pick her up and she said yes. I told her that I would wait in the pickup area and she could come to the car.
She got mad at me and told me that she needed help walking as she had sprained her leg. I told her that the hospital would give her a wheelchair (as per policy) to her car, so it should be fine.
I go to the hospital after a few hours. Pick her up. Drive back home.
Help her to bed. Went back to sleep.
Since then, she has been so mad at me. She thinks I am a jerk for:
1. Calling an ambulance instead of driving her. She has to pay for the ambulance now.
2. I didn’t accompany her to the hospital even though she was wasted and scared and bleeding.
3. I didn’t come inside the hospital to keep her company or help her while leaving.
The thing is I have been very considerate that she is in pain. I cooked for her. I changed the dressings for her. I am still doing all the chores. Etc etc. However, she is still mad and keeps bringing this up and asking for an apology.
I told her that she knew how I felt about hospitals and she was being unreasonable. She told me that she felt like I didn’t care about her. I told her that I had been taking care of her at home (I wouldn’t be doing that if I didn’t care), and I just did not want to be in a hospital unless it was serious.
She told me that I abandoned her. After weeks of back and forth, I got mad and told her that it was just stitches and it wasn’t the end of the world and to just get over this incident.
AITJ?”
10. AITJ For Telling My Grandpa To Go Ahead With The Divorce?
“My grandad (76) out of the blue said that he wanted to get a divorce, which pretty much threw our whole family into chaos because everyone thought that my grandmom and grandad had a good relationship.
Pretty much everybody was vehemently against it. My family almost convinced him not to do it, until I (19 M) came back home and found out what was going on.
When my grandad brought up the divorce I was away in another town (meeting some of my friends) so I had no idea what was going on (no one bothered to tell me through a call or text).
When I came back I could tell something huge had gone down, so I asked my dad (one of the few people who was neither against it nor for it) what happened. He told me what went down in the past couple of days. I went to talk to my grandad and asked him why he wanted to get a divorce.
It took a long time but he pretty much told me everything. He was arranged to marry my grandma when he was around 19, it was more of a business deal than a marriage (they both come from affluent families) and he did not want to go through it but in the end, he was forced to do it.
He’s been enduring it for decades for my grandma’s, mom’s, and uncle’s sake but he told me he wanted to be a little selfish and do what he wants to do until he dies.
I told him that it was okay to be selfish and to go ahead with the divorce so he wouldn’t regret it.
This little nudge was probably what he needed because the very next day he filed for a divorce. Now, almost everybody is furious at me for ‘destroying’ our family and being a bad grandson to my grandma.”
9. AITJ For Clapping Back At My Husband's Mother For The Hurtful Things She Said About My Relationship With Him?
“When my husband was born he was adopted by his grandparents so he calls them his parents since they raised him but the woman I’m talking about is the woman that gave him up.
We’ll call her Felicia.
I started taking care of my husband’s parents and family before we even got married because I had a great job and I wanted to help out.
Fast forward we’ve now been married 10 months. I’m 5 months pregnant and still have a better-paying job than my husband so mostly everything comes out of my bank account and I don’t mind but because of this… my in-laws somewhat see me as a bank.
Every time they needed money they would always text ME, saying my husband’s name and asking him for money but NEVER acknowledge me. Knowing full well that the money they’re asking for is obviously gonna come from me. They also know very well that they’re texting me and not my husband but it seems that they’re doing this intentionally.
And when they got things from us they would post online thanking only him until he called them out that they would add my name. I’m not looking for praise or anything but a simple acknowledgment of my existence would be nice every now and then.
Anywho back to Felicia. Every time we got paid she would always ask for money and I would say no because I wanted to prioritize giving money to his parents first. But just tonight she again texted me asking my husband how he is, totally ignoring the fact that it’s me she’s texting.
So I replied and told her that it was me and that she could text my husband on his phone or his messenger but she replied saying ‘Why? Why can’t I text your messenger?’ Then I said that if she’s not gonna acknowledge me when she texts then I don’t want her texting me at all.
She got mad and started cussing me out, saying things like I’m too old for her son, and that his partner before me was younger and a lot prettier. Along with other stupid stuff… the only thing that she said that made me so mad was – she said that she hopes I die when I give birth and my baby dies too.
I got so angry I told her that she had no right to talk to me like that and she shouldn’t feel entitled to anything regarding my husband because she’s not his mother. Also told her that she shouldn’t be talking about my pregnancy and my baby because all her 6 kids have different dads and different last names.
My husband always takes my side so I’m not worried but I do kinda feel bad for what I said soooo AITJ?”
8. AITJ For Refusing To Return The Dog My Friend Gave To Me?
“One of my (17 F) friends (17 F) was the owner of two huskies, a boy and a girl. She thought that the female was spayed but after a few months. The dog got pregnant and ended up with 4 husky pups. She’s deeply against selling and buying animals and the huskies were rescued from one of her uncle’s houses, so she tried to get all of them a family within her contacts.
I had just lost my beloved cat and she knew how sad I felt ever since he passed away I was all alone, so she offered me one of the pups. I tried to give her some money or pay for the other pups’ immunization shots but she refused. She said she only wanted me to take care of him so I said sure.
I named him Mango, he’s been with me for a year now and I absolutely adore him, he’s a lot of work like most huskies are, but it is totally worth it. He’s also super cute and big.
A week ago my friend contacted me because both of her dogs had passed. The boy had cancer and after he left, the girl didn’t last long and died of sadness, it was so heartbreaking to hear that so I offered to meet her at the park and see Mango.
After she arrived she was delighted with how many tricks he knew (thanks to my brother (17 M)) and with how big and beautiful he looked. I showed her photos of Mango growing up, I showed her some of his toys and the house my brother built for him, and all of his harnesses (he has a variety because since he’s white, I like to change color!
He was wearing a yellow one that day, like a Mango!).
My dog snuggled with us and we stayed in silence for a while until she told me she would like to have the dog back. I was obviously taken aback and I said no with a rude tone. My friend became mad too and told me that it wasn’t like I paid for the dog or something, so I had to give it back because she gave him to me when I needed it and now that her dogs were gone, she needed it more.
I said that that wasn’t how it worked and that Mango was mine, even if she tried to take him with her, he wouldn’t go. She began to cry but I didn’t want to engage anymore so I just took my dog and left her there. She’s telling people that I stole her dog but my brother and dad said that Mango is ours and there’s nothing she can do about it.
I have him chipped so even if she tried to lawfully claim that I stole him it won’t work. Yet I feel bad because I left her crying there and I know how much it hurts to lose a pet, so AITJ?”
7. AITJ For Wanting To Give A Bigger Part Of My Inheritance To One Of My Daughters?
“I am in my 60s and have three children in their 30s – Anna, Bella and Clara.
I have been a single parent since my kids were young and my only asset is my house.
It was cheap when I bought it but is quite valuable now, more for the land than the modest house. I live off a pension and a little casual work.
Anna has two degrees, full-time work, a child, and a partner. They are comfortable but they rent and have asked me a couple of times if I would help them buy a house.
I feel it’s a risk to take a mortgage out on my own home given I have very little income so said no. This has caused some tension.
Bella is single and also has two degrees and full-time work. She bought a small apartment about 10 years ago and has a small mortgage. She is very good with money, I can only think of one time she asked me to borrow money and she paid me back in a matter of weeks.
Clara still lives with me in the family home. She didn’t finish high school due to some learning difficulties and mental health issues. She has started a few courses without success and has tried living with friends before but it hasn’t worked out. She works part-time but doesn’t earn much and isn’t great with finances.
To be honest I really like her living here, especially as I get older. She does the gardening and is good company.
Anna and Clara don’t get along. Anna thinks I baby Clara and Clara thinks Anna has a superiority complex. Bella gets along with everyone.
I recently wrote my will and asked Bella to come with me to the lawyer.
I told her I wanted her to be the sole executor so that Anna and Clara wouldn’t fight. At the lawyer’s office, I explained that I wanted my estate to be split into thirds with one part to Anna and two parts to Bella. I told Bella she would be responsible for looking after Clara with what would be Clara’s third (I know this is not legally enforceable but I trust her to do this).
I also put a caveat that so long as Clara wishes to live in the house it can’t be sold. This delays any inheritance to the other two, but I just don’t want Clara to end up homeless. As soon as she wants to leave it gets sold and the proceeds split. I trust Bella to be able to help Clara use her portion towards an apartment if she wants to.
I ran this by Bella and she just said ‘It’s your will, I’m not going to tell you what to do’. The lawyer however said I was going to make life difficult for Bella with this setup. I asked Bella again if it was okay but she refused to give an opinion, she just made a joke about how if she’s lucky she’ll die before me.
I thought it was a good solution to make sure Clara is ok when I’m gone but I don’t know if I’m being unfair to Bella. I know Anna will think the situation is unfair, but I don’t want her forcing the sale of the house as soon as I die.
After consideration, I stuck to my original plan, but this might make me a jerk. If I am, I’m not sure what to do that will ensure Clara is okay without me.”
6. AITJ For Not Telling My Mom About My Arrangement With My Friend?
“A year ago one of my really good friends got diagnosed with diabetes. My friend was in the middle of opening up his own restaurant at the time and had no insurance. I work at a Manufacturing plant and have really good benefits, including insurance. Knowing my friend was desperate for help offered to legally marry him so he could be put on my insurance, he happily agreed to pay me a small fee every month to cover the difference that I have to pay for having a second person on my insurance.
Although there’s nothing illegal about what we did, we both agreed that it would be best not to tell anybody with the exception of his partner, who knows I’m asexual and is happy that I was able to help him.
His restaurant opened a couple of months ago and it seems to be going well so we decided to get a ‘divorce.’ He is now more financially secure and will be able to pay for his own insurance.
Also, his partner recently graduated college and is now working as a teacher so she has good insurance now. He’s planning to propose soon and they’ve been talking about getting married in a couple of years.
Anyway, my mom was over at my house on Monday and she used my laptop because she wanted to Google a recipe.
She saw my search history and she asked me why I was looking up information about getting divorced. I didn’t know what to say at this point, so I just told her the truth and she went ballistic. She told me that I completely betrayed her by hiding such a big secret from her and she couldn’t believe I got married without telling her, she left my house angry.
I called her a few days later once I thought she might’ve calmed down. That was yesterday and she still hasn’t returned my call. AITJ?”
5. AITJ For Walking Out Of My Best Friend's Wedding Where I Am The Maid Of Honor?
“I dated my ex, ‘John,’ for four years, and got serious enough that we started planning for our future (wedding, kids, etc.). I thought we were pretty happy, but last year he dumped me pretty suddenly. I tried to figure out what went wrong, but he said it was ‘personal’ and that I should respect his space.
During this time, my best friend ‘Stacy’ and her fiancé ‘Tom’ were my rocks, letting me crash at their place and just being overwhelmingly supportive and loving. When Stacy asked me to be her maid of honor, I thought it was a no-brainer and happily took on the task.
Fast forward to what happened this weekend: the morning of the wedding, Tom asked me to meet him for breakfast super early in the AM before all of the festivities.
I thought it was weird but assumed he maybe wanted me to pass something on to Stacy.
What happened instead was that Tom let me know that a few days prior, Stacy admitted to him that she had an affair with John, which was what led to my breakup. He said that Stacy wanted to come clean to ‘start their marriage fresh,’ and that he was forgiving her to move forward.
He had gone back and forth between telling me and finally decided to spill the beans. I guess he had expected me to forgive Stacy too because the affair was ‘so long ago’. The opposite pretty much happened, and I just walked out on the wedding.
It ended up causing a huge mess because I was basically running the whole show (Stacy made me do everything, so she didn’t even know what was happening at certain times or who to call).
Not only that, but everyone realized that the maid of honor wasn’t there (she had headshots and bios of the party on her wedding page), and news of the affair eventually got out because her cousin knew John.
Stacy and Tom have both been slandering me online now, saying that I ruined their once-in-a-lifetime moment.
Some of their friends are on their side, saying that I should have handled the situation more privately, and at least stuck out the wedding since it was so last minute. I personally don’t know what Tom expected, but either way, I’ve been getting bombarded with texts and I heard that Stacy has been so upset she’s had to take time off work, which does make me feel like a jerk.
Especially since I’ve just been ignoring her calls.”
4. AITJ For Wanting My Sister To Pay For My Dog's Surgery?
“I (F 28) have a working dog who is intact and obviously (normally) carefully handled to ensure no accidents happen.
I went on a two-day trip recently and my dog sitter got sick a day before I left, so I asked my sister (F 34) if she could watch her for the same rate I was paying the in-home sitter.
She said she’d love to and that I didn’t have to pay her at all because it’s not much of an inconvenience since she has two (spayed female) dogs of her own, and we worked out all the details including that she’ll be in a strange neighborhood without her owner so she needs to be leashed even for bathroom breaks (they don’t have a fence on their yard, just one of those picket ones across the front).
Certainly, you know where this is going by now; on day 2 my sister takes her out to pee with her other dogs without a leash, and she runs off to try to find me. She was out for SIX HOURS before my sister found her, and only because she came back to the block on her own.
I got home late that night and she only mentioned to me then that she had been out on her own for hours. I was upset but didn’t say anything too bad, mostly just that she should have told me immediately.
I didn’t really think of it as the main issue since she wasn’t in heat, but a few weeks later, it was obvious she was pregnant.
I have no interest in becoming a backyard breeder so I asked what type of termination my vets recommend and both of them recommended to get her spayed and terminate her pregnancy since she’s 6 years old, it’s easier on her body and she’s fully developed already. I’m not thrilled about it but it is what it is.
$750 surgery all told. As soon as I got the quote I told my sister that I’d be expecting her to pay for it, but that I’m willing the deduct the amount I would have paid her for dogsitting had she not refused payment. I also said I’m fine with a payment plan if she can’t pay that much right now.
At first, she said she’d pay half but not more, then devolved into it not being her fault at all because I wasn’t even going to pay her, which obviously doesn’t make much sense but I’m wondering if she’s upset because she expected me to ‘insist’ more when she said no to payment? I only said ‘Are you sure?’ or something to that effect, I didn’t really push it at the time.
Anyway, we went back and forth for a few days both before and after the surgery, and she finally ended up sending me the money, then blocked my number. I called our mom to talk about it and she said that my sister felt like I was making her feel worse and more guilty about a mistake she already feels bad about.
I asked if she could tell my sister for me that I don’t want her to feel bad and I understand mistakes happen, I just don’t think it’s fair for me to foot the bill for it. That just made everyone angrier. I don’t know what to do!
AITJ? Should I send her the money back/apologize?
Was it wrong to leave my dog with her, to begin with?”
3. AITJ For Rejecting My Wife's Baby Name Suggestions?
My wife and I are expecting our first child in the coming months and we have chosen not to find out the gender until the baby is born. Things are starting to feel very real now so we’ve started to properly discuss names, but we’ve realised we both have vastly different tastes in name style and we are having a hard time finding the right one.
My wife likes names that are out there and unique but I find these names tacky and silly and would prefer a better-known, more traditional name.
Last night she showed me a short list she had put together and thought I might like. The names on the list were:
Girl: Fern, Fennix, Rhodes, Faun, Brixtyn, and Kinley
Boy: Spark, Diesel, Quincy, Phoenix, Buck, and Fox
These names are tamer than what she’s suggested before, but I told her they didn’t feel right. I suggested ideas like Rose instead of Rhodes, Felix instead of Phoenix, and Buchanan instead of Buck.
I finally snapped when she suggested Zoomer. I asked if she was serious and said it was a stupid name.
She asked what my problem was and why I was so dismissive of all her ideas and shooting down all the names she liked. I told her we were naming a child and not a dog, and that names can have a huge impact on the child. I said I don’t want my child to be bullied or taken less seriously because they have a ridiculous name.
She told me I was rude and that I was the bully for making her feel unsupported. She started crying and went to bed. I decided to give her some time and space so waited till she was sleeping to go to bed.
I feel bad about coming at her the way I did, but I also feel it needed to be said.”
2. AITJ For Wanting My Partner To Lessen Her Time Knitting?
“My (30 M) partner (27 F) is really into knitting and has been long before we started going out 3 months ago. At first, it didn’t bother me and I thought it was cool she had a hobby but then I realized just how much she does it.
Granted, she’s not pulling out the knitting hook at dinner or anything but it seems anytime we’re watching TV together or just hanging out at her place she’s always working on some project. She said she needs to keep her hands busy and it’s like fidgeting for her, but I severely doubt that she can be fully present.
You don’t have to pay attention when you fidget and she literally always jokes that she doesn’t know how to count. She claimed it’s not all the time… but it’s definitely more often than not. She argued that she could follow TV show plots just fine but when I quizzed her on some details she couldn’t answer some of the questions sooo… I think my point stands.
Then she said ‘If it’s an important conversation I obviously put my work down’ but I think we have different definitions of what important means.
I also told her I would like to be able to cuddle and physically interact with her during TV time. She said we can still cuddle but it’s literally not the same?
I want her to be interested in me, not some pile of yarn.
This might be petty but I think I might feel better about it if she knitted things for me, but it always seems to be bags or clothes for herself or like random squares. She did make a pretty cute toy for my dog though, that was actually nice.
Anyway, I sat her down the other day and told her my perspective, and instead of being willing to compromise, she told me that I was the one who was not listening to her and essentially called me a jerk.
She’s a great girl and I don’t want to lose her over this but also not sure what to do.
AITJ?”
1. AITJ For Kicking My Partner Out For Prioritizing His Mother?
“My partner (30 M) and I (23 F) have been together for 2 years, living together for a little over 1. We had moved in together roughly 6 months into our relationship and agreed to split everything 50/50.
After about 2 months of living together, he started being very short on cash. By that I mean he would ask me to send him money for lunch when he was at work on numerous occasions.
At the time, he made more money than me (I had 2 jobs and was still just barely making what he made with one full-time job) and I was concerned as to why he couldn’t afford anything throughout the month. He revealed at this point that he was paying his mother’s half of her rent as well.
He said that this was the deal he had to make with her in order for him to move in with me. I did not know this before moving in or I wouldn’t have asked.
This did not stop as time went on but we managed. I started picking up dinners, lunches, and groceries… You name it.
Some time went by and he started mentioning wanting to buy his mother a house. I told him that he couldn’t even afford cat food. How is he gonna afford a house? Under his name? It didn’t make sense to me, but again as long as my bills were covered he can do what he wants… until they weren’t.
he began to delay rent significantly. I’m talking 2-3 weeks late on rent/utilities consistently.
Eventually, he told me he’d be behind on rent for 2.5 months because he couldn’t pay, due to him paying all the closing costs and down payment on this house for his mom. For context, at this point, I didn’t even KNOW he had dropped money on it.
He never told me until after it was already done, papers signed and money dropped. He even told me he had to withdraw his 401k savings from his job in order to meet half of the down payment. I told him I was uncomfortable with that and he said he didn’t have a choice, therefore I didn’t have a choice.
He was late on that payment too, I did not receive June or July bills until the last week of July.
We also haven’t been on dates, he can’t take me out because he gives all his money to his mom. He can’t buy groceries, can’t pay bills on time, and won’t make time for me unless we’re under the same roof.
So I kicked him out. However he is trying to make me feel bad about it because I should be supporting him, I should support this decision and be more ’empathetic’ as he put it. Because he ‘needed’ to do this as a debt he owes to his mom for bringing him to the States 5 years ago.
There have been other things in between, bickering fights and whatnot regarding finances and him not spending time with me. I get home from 12-hour shifts to find a dirty house and him on the PlayStation, so that also adds to the frustration on my part.
So AITJ for kicking my partner out for choosing his mother and this house over me, my well-being, and our bills?”
Metaspoon Slow or Crashing?
If Metaspoon is causing your browser to crash or run slowly, please try viewing the article in Lite Mode and it should run more smoothly!