People Want Us To Delve Into Their "Am I The Jerk?" Stories

What would you do if someone you knew was being a massive jerk, and you didn't know how to tell them? There are a few different paths you could take. For one, you can tell them straight to their face, or you could take the high road and walk away from the situation without escalating anything. Or, you could simply answer their question on an online forum and explain to them every single detail as to why they are a jerk, with no hard feelings! Read on and let us know who you think the jerk is. AITJ = Am I the jerk? NTJ = Not the jerk YTJ = You're the jerk WIBTJ = Would I be the jerk? EHS = Everyone here sucks

16. AITJ For Getting Into A Relationship With My Best Friend's Ex?


“So my ex-best friend Katie hasn’t talked to me ever since I started seeing her ex Matt 5 months ago. A little history first:

  • I’ve known Katie since 6th grade and we are both 22 now.

    We’ve had the same group of friends ever since we met and have continued to be in the same small group of friends up until this all happened. Katie started acting weird ever since we finished our undergrad.

    I mean weird as in she had been more anti-social, more critical of strangers, and just generally less pleasant to be around. I talked about it with a couple of my other friends in our group and they agreed that she’d been acting weird ever since she didn’t get her dream job coming out of school.

  • Matt and I met during my sophomore year of high school and he and I instantly became good friends.

    He was a year younger than me and I was already in a relationship (that lasted until I was 20), so I never thought of him as more than a good friend. He would listen to me if I was having trouble with my partner and I would listen to him complain about whatever problems he was having.

    We would go a month or two without contact sometimes but would pick up wherever we left off once we ran into each other again.

  • Well around the time I broke up with my partner, Matt and Katie started seeing each other.

    I thought it was the best thing in the world because two of my good friends were seeing each other. Well, I was wrong. They were together for a little over a year and in that time they fought for at least half of it.

    Katie was downright mean to Matt. She told him his friends were always annoying, that she didn’t really like his parents, that his hobbies (mostly playing his instruments) were dumb, etc. In hindsight, I should have said something.

    But when either would complain to me about how the other had done something stupid, I insisted that I was to stay neutral because it wouldn’t be fair to either of them if I took a side.

    They both respected my decision.

So Matt and Katie broke up back in December of 2014 but kept in contact until the end of March this year. I saw Matt, without Katie being with him, for the first time in about 6 months in mid-April of this year and we chatted for a little bit.

He told me how much happier he was without Katie and I just said I was glad he was happy. Then we started talking more and more throughout the month. It was the first time we had been friends without one of us in a relationship so we were beginning to talk like never before.

And by the end of May this year we had started seeing each other.

While all that was happening, I was thinking about how Katie would react. I knew it may not be right, but it had been 5 months since they broke up and she was a major witch to him during half the relationship.

So I told her a week before we started seeing each other and she was infuriated. All she told me was that it wasn’t okay and that she didn’t approve at all. She has avoided seeing me at all costs and it has put some tension in our group of friends.

She refuses to discuss it with anyone as well.

My logic is that they broke up 5 months before we started seeing each other and she was a jerk to him for so long. Her logic, I’m assuming, is that I betrayed her.

So then, AITJ?”

Another User Comments:

“I’m not saying you’re the jerk, because you aren’t, but I can understand Katie’s anger.

First of all, you asked her and she said no, but you went ahead with it anyways.

From her perspective, it seems like you don’t care that she disapproved. This probably isn’t the case but people don’t always think rationally.

Secondly, she’s already lost a close friend (Matt) and to her, it seems like you’re taking his side.

She might think she’ll lose you too. This would cause more panicked and illogical behavior.

I don’t think you’re the jerk. I don’t think you should let this affect your relationship with Matt. However, I don’t think this is worth losing a close friend over.

She might be able to come to terms with your new relationship. I’m not sure if she’s the jerk yet. If you try to make things right I think she’ll reveal if she’s the jerk.

Hope this helps.” Shyor

Another User Comments:

“I would say that you’re a jerk. You’re prioritizing your desire over your friends’ feelings. If you really care about Katie then you wouldn’t have gone out with Matt when you found out how upset she was.

You can claim that Katie is being unreasonable, you can claim that she used to be a witch to him, you can claim that you deserve him more, but when it’s all said and done you hurt your friend.

Having said that, I suspect that maybe you don’t value your friendship with Katie and that’s why you’re able to do this. I don’t think it’s an actual friendship if you don’t value it.

So I think the true answer to your question is whether Katie was really your friend before you asked out Matt. If she was (which is what you claim hence my initial response) then you did betray her.

If you didn’t value that friendship anymore then people move on and you don’t have any true obligation to her, you should probably feel some empathy for her, but I don’t think you’re strictly a jerk.” Orccen

Another User Comments:

“Nope, I have never been an advocate of the idea that you should not go out with your friend’s ex or whatsoever since individuals are not property no matter if the main person in question is male or female.

Since they broke up 5 months ago and their past relationship has been full of negative energy, I don’t see how you could have maybe crossed the line/gone in too early, etc.

Also, your friend Katie seems like she had been hit with reality too hard after realizing the world doesn’t offer itself to her on a silver platter and it ain’t easy to get your dream job. Maybe that is why she is the way she is now, bitter and resentful.” YvonnePewPew

9 points - Liked by leja2, shgo, LizzieTX and 7 more

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Breezer2800 1 year ago
NTJ. I agree with the last comment, that people aren't property and they shouldn't be "owned" by someone, even after the relationship ended.

To me it sounds like the relationship between OP and Matt was a long time coming, the only unfortunate part is Matt was in a lousy relationship with OP's friend Katie several months prior.

Yes, you can argue that it was disrespectful of OP to go out with Matt knowing Katie disapproved, but at the end of the day both OP and Matt are independent individuals capable of making their own choices, and Katie doesn't get to dictate or claim a "permanent dibs" of sorts on Matt just because they dated at one point.

So no, I don't think OP is a jerk, but they better be prepared to say goodbye to their friendship with Katie, because sadly it's likely not going to survive this.
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15. AITJ For Telling My Parents That I Wish They Could've Given Me More?


“I (24M) was poor growing up. We had to rough it throughout my childhood and teenage years. College was funded solely by scholarships and terrible part-time jobs. I don’t hold any resentment towards my parents over this, but it was hard at the time.

I think I would still be struggling now, had things been different.

I met my partner (31M) during my sophomore year and we’ve been together for just under 5 years. His family was in the exact opposite financial situation as mine.

He has an established position in his father’s company – he has since we met – and works remotely.

Since my graduation in May, we’ve spent almost the entire summer with his parents, sightseeing and bouncing around to their different vacation homes.

It was such a wonderful experience. I never thought I’d experience something like that, but the adjustment was easier than I expected.

As we headed back home this week, we stopped by to visit my parents (45F and 47M).

While there, I mentioned that this summer felt like ‘what all the summer breaks of my childhood should’ve been,’ and how excited I was for the future when my partner and I have children and can give them this treatment.

My mother apparently took incredible offense to what I had said and said they had done the best they could for me as a child. I replied that I never claimed any differently. The argument ended with us still not seeing eye to eye, and my husband and I made an early departure than we had been planning on thanks to the tension in the house that remained.


Another User Comments:


You can be honest about your childhood by saying you were poor. Saying ‘my childhood should’ve been like this,’ when your parents didn’t choose to be poor is a huge jerk move.

‘It was so easy to adjust.’

Someone please take the silver spoon out of OP’s mouth.” ElevatorOk8601

Another User Comments:

“YTJ look it’s great that you are doing well and will be able to provide more materially for your kids in the future but don’t put down your parents for not being able to provide you with more when you were a kid.

They did the best they could and provided probably by working very hard to give you what you had.

If a safe and loving environment where you were fed, clothed, and receiving an education isn’t good enough for you and you shamed your parents for not taking you around the world, you’re a jerk and an entitled one at that.” ReiEvangel

Another User Comments:


I’m gonna get downvoted, but I’m going to say soft NTJ.

My parents were wealthy, but they didn’t give me enough. (Extreme neglect that gave way to all kinds of maltreatment at the hands of hired help and ‘family friends.’) When I brought up all the terrible things that were done to me, they got upset and said, ‘Well, we did our best.’ And they did.

But it wasn’t enough.

It’s obviously good to have gratitude for things you had, but what a lot of people are missing here is that it is also okay to grieve the things you didn’t.

I’m sure your parents are wonderful people, but I can’t help but empathize with the kid you were in times you had to go without. Sometimes, needs aren’t met and feeling that loss is okay.

Did you have to say it in front of your husband? Probably not.

Your feelings are valid. The delivery of those feelings? Not so much.

I hope things work out for you, OP. Good luck.” [deleted]

Another User Comments:


I grew up poor and my partner is better off (albeit not to this extent) and we go away with his family and enjoy things my family couldn’t do, for various reasons (not just financial, although that is one).

I would NEVER say anything like this to my mother. It is incredibly offensive. No one chooses to be poor. No one chooses to ‘rough it’, as you put it. My mother worked hard to give us everything in life and she went without herself to give us more.

It is a huge insult to say that now you know what life ‘should’ have been like for you. It’s also ridiculously privileged because owning multiple vacation homes isn’t the norm – it’s not the average experience in any sense – so no, it isn’t even what your childhood ‘should’ have been like because it is so far above average.” sunkathousandtimes

7 points - Liked by Amel1, lebe, Ree1778 and 7 more

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Templetexas 10 months ago
Yjt my dad was a nurse aide and there was 7 of us and we lived in a small house the 4 boys slept on one bed and the three girls one bed we had food and clothes so you are ungrateful
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14. AITJ For Expecting My Son To Walk His Grandmother's Dog?


“My son is almost 20. Just before he turned 18 things came to a head and he moved out. He lived with my sister, finished HS, and my mom gave him a car. He got a job and started college.

Soon he dropped out and my mom got involved and he moved in with her. She tried to teach him the basics of how to be an adult and he started therapy and an online school program which he soon quit.

He hasn’t made a lot of progress in the area of personal responsibility and blames me for his upbringing. He says that’s the reason he is the way he is anytime shortcomings are brought up.

By the time he was 19 he was smoking and had lost his job. He got another job bussing tables 45 minutes away. He also wrecked the car my mom got him and she bought him another one.

My mom bought a condo to be closer to us and while the condo was under renovation my son lived there alone to be closer to work.

Since then, he’s made some bad choices including daily substance use. Then he quit his job.

The condo was just finished and my mom moved in. She has a little dog who is old and there isn’t a yard so the dog is having accidents in the house a lot and needs to be walked.

My mom’s health issues make walking very painful. She asked my son to walk the dog and she even offered to pay him $5/hour and he refused. He said it is insulting that she thinks his time is worth less than minimum wage, and he said all this in front of a lady my mom hired to help her unpack.

My mom was mortified and hurt so she called me.

I sent him a text: “I’m really hurt that after all my mom does for you, you can’t walk her dog? She is literally paying for your existence and is extremely sick.

If there’s one way to get on my bad side it’s to disrespect my mom. That goes for anyone on this planet. Your aunts and I are extremely protective of her. If they knew I can assure you they would not be happy either.

She is old and fragile and has been literally taking care of you. You’re almost 20. She owes you nothing. You can at least walk her dog and should do so with a happy heart.”

His reply: “What? I told her I’d walk the dog.

I just said I’m not going to walk it for an hour for $5. Wouldn’t you be offended if someone told you that your time is worth less than minimum wage?”

I basically told him to grow the heck up, that he’s almost 20 years old.

He wants to be treated like an adult but won’t act like one. He called me selfish and asked how else I expected him to turn out with a mom like me. He laid into me, it was awful.

Turns out he did agree to walk the dog… for $5/ half hour.

Am I a jerk for calling him out on not walking my mom’s dog before being told he did finally agree to do it?”

Another User Comments:


Your kid is absolutely dreadful though. Oh my gosh. I’m sorry I know that’s your son but holy crap. He reminds me of a few people I know in my own family.

Your mother needs to cut him off.

Everyone needs to cut him off. He needs to fall flat on his face before he might possibly learn to be a responsible adult.

The best thing you can do is just remove yourself from that equation.

Be there for your mom but don’t put yourself in the line of fire of your son. You know he’s just gonna be a jerk about everything so don’t even bother. He’s an adult now.

It’s no longer your responsibility to make sure he treats anyone correctly.” kalkiki

Another User Comments:


Does he pay your mother rent? Buy his own food? Does she want him there?

If he wants to get paid $10.00 an hour for walking the dog that’s their new agreement.

Sounds like it’s time for many new agreements. Like paying rent and utilities and food.

Is your mother an enabler, or do you think she’s stuck? Would she appreciate your help in getting him out, or would she stop you? Unfortunately, leeches are very difficult to remove once attached.

They need a serious disincentive to let go.” Usually_uncruel

Another User Comments:

“NTJ. You should send him a link to this sub and tell him he should be ashamed of himself for being a disgraceful person that does nothing but take and never gives back…

he’s selfish and cruel. Maybe when he’s sleeping on the street somewhere because no one wants to speak to him he will learn that he was wrong. Has your mother considered throwing him out?” GonnaBeIToldUSo

4 points - Liked by olderandwiser, leja2, lebe and 1 more

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Kilzer53 10 months ago
U need to turn it around on him. His upbringing ended when he quits listening to yall and quit respecting others. His actions ate all on HIM. If i were u and ur mother - i would kick him to the curb and let him find out how hard life really is with no support system. Let him live on his own.
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13. AITJ For Telling My Friend To Back Off?


“I’m pregnant, my due date was two days ago. Family and friends are, understandably, constantly asking for updates, wanting to know if the baby has arrived yet. I’m happy to oblige with info – seeing and feeling the support network around us is comforting.

But I’m also a little skittish. I grew up in an awful family, with an extremely intrusive mother (Borderline Personality Disorder), so I’m particular about invasions of my personal space and privacy. I was raised with a skewed perspective of what is “normal” – how much access I owe to whom – so I’m still learning where and how to place and reinforce boundaries.

Which is where you good people come in.

A good friend of mine, who is aware of my upbringing, pushed me a bit too far the other day.

Bit more background. We moved last week. We helped renovate the new place and are fixing up the old.

My doc has been expecting me to go into labor for the past three weeks, I’ve been having intermittent contractions every day, and we’ve been on continuous baby alert, which is nerve-wracking and physically taxing.

I haven’t been able to walk or stand for more than a few minutes for the past three months because I have SPD (pregnancy-related loosening of the pelvic bones, fairly painful stuff). The holidays were underway.

We have a big dog that needs daily exercise. My SO has really stepped up, he’s worked his butt off to make all of this happen before the baby comes – basically alone, since I’ve been sidelined by the pregnancy – while working a full-time job.

We’re in good spirits, but a LOT has been going on.

My friend is a freelancer and just finished a big project. There’s now a lull in her work schedule. Her partner’s family is visiting for the holidays from overseas.

She’s a bit bored and also looking to escape her in-laws every once in a while.

So. Day one of our (two-day) move, she texts me to complain about how everything is “too much” and how she just broke down crying because she’s under so much pressure, having to work right up until her in-laws arrive.

I don’t answer, because I’m lying in bed, trying to breathe through contractions and postpone labor, all while my SO and two friends are taking down and reassembling our kitchen in the new place.

The next day (our big moving day), she texts me again to ask how things are going.

I am cooking lunch for a dozen people who showed up to help us out, so again I don’t answer. She texts a third time, now in a panic, assuming I might be in labor.

We’re currently carrying all of our junk into the new place, so I don’t see the text. She calls me, but I don’t see the call. She then calls my SO, who doesn’t see the call.

I finally discover that she’s been trying to reach me and tell her that no, I’m not in labor, I’ve just been very busy. Because we’re moving, which she is aware of. She texts that she’s going to be checking in a lot over the next few days.

I say I probably won’t be able to answer her if I’m in labor anyway. She says “exactly, that way I’ll know”. This creeps me out. I tell her she’s sweet, but that she’s applying too much pressure, and that I will let her know when things start going down.

A few days later, on Christmas Eve, she texts me, wanting to exchange gifts.

I tell her no, there’s just too much going on, I’d like to meet up after we’ve finished setting up the new apartment, after the holidays. She says OK and backs off for a bit.

Two days later (still officially the holidays here in Europe), she texts me again, saying she has some free time and wants to stop by. I answer, again, that there’s too much stuff going on and clearly state that I will let her know when we’re ready for visitors.

Two more days go by. She texts again. Her partner’s family has left town, so now they’re free to help out with the move if we need anything. I say, again, thanks but we’re fine, we might need help painting in a week or two but we’re good till then, and AGAIN, that I will approach her when we’re ready for visitors and to exchange gifts.

Two days go by. She texts again. She’ll be in the neighborhood that afternoon and would like to come by to exchange gifts. I don’t see the text message because I’m busy as heck building furniture and, again, breathing through contractions.

When she doesn’t get a reply, she just shows up at our door, partner and gifts in tow. I’m shocked and angry, but polite, and invite them in for a chat. They do us a favor and take the dog for a walk, but that really just throws us off schedule, because they stay out longer than planned and want to open gifts afterward – I can’t start any new big tasks until they come back, so I lose a lot of valuable furniture building time.

We exchange gifts. It’s a bit strained but OK.

Right before they leave, she lets drop that when she couldn’t reach me or my SO on moving day, she started researching what hospitals are in the vicinity of our apartment, and calling them to find out if I’m registered there, and if so, whether I’ve gone into labor.

(She knows that I made an extra effort to register privately because I’m afraid my parents will do exactly this, then show up at the hospital and make a scene.) Then I snap. I tell her (politely, with no rage, though SO says he could see I was seething) that this is not OK, that it’s a sensitive time and that we need more space.

While they’re leaving, I give her a hug so she doesn’t feel too bad.

I’m not sure why she’s so focused on my pregnancy and birth. When she’s busy, she hardly pays attention – when she’s not, she gets pretty intense.

She has said a number of times that she wants to see how my body has changed in the last weeks of pregnancy. (I hate that. I am not a circus attraction.) She’s commented a lot about how I haven’t gained too much weight, how lucky that is, and also how odd she finds that to be.

She has always commented on how slim I am. So my best-educated guess is that she was pushing to see me while still pregnant both out of boredom and out of some sort of morbid fascination with my body.

But I do also think that she genuinely wants to support us however she can – it just has to be on her terms. Which is totally OK. I may have also been too nice during all of this? Not clear and direct enough? That may have caused some confusion for her.

Relevant side story: She and her partner were supposed to watch our dog when I go into labor.

When I found out her in-laws were coming to visit right before my due date, I had to ask if they could still take on the dog if the baby comes while they’re visiting.

Her response was basically: “Oh yeah, come to think of it, I guess not, haha! If you don’t find anyone else, let me know, but we really don’t have time after all.” I hate to think what would have happened if I had gone into labor without clearing that up first.

But – also – before the move, her partner spent an entire afternoon helping us build a cupboard for the kitchen, and expected nothing in return, which was awesome. He has helped us numerous times before.

We usually cook them a big fancy meal as a thank you.

That evening, after the forced visit, I text her an explanation – that I understand that she’s emotionally involved, and that I’m glad I have her support, but that I am not comfortable with her behavior.

That forcing a visit after being told numerous times that we did not want them stopping by meant she didn’t respect our boundaries and that it made me worry about what it could be like when the baby is here.

Will she disregard our wishes then too? And that calling hospitals to find out where I’m registered is intrusive. I also told her that not every woman enjoys her body being viewed and evaluated in the last weeks of pregnancy because it’s a really awkward and uncomfortable time.

I ended the text on a positive note, thanking her for her help and interest, but I was still pretty direct about the whole thing. She didn’t react well and said I’m being overly critical and hypersensitive, that I’d deeply hurt her feelings and created distance between us, and that all of her previous pregnant friends appreciated the effort she put in.

Basically: That I’m the weird one.

So. Am I pushing her away for no reason? Was her behavior normal (especially calling the hospital)? Am I overreacting? AITJ?”

Another User Comments:

“NTJ. She is being a crappy friend by ignoring your wishes for no visits and failing to fulfill her promise of assistance with the dog (especially considering her lack of communication on that point), and by being so dismissive of your concerns.

You are not being a jerk by being direct and explaining your valid concerns. If she calms down and comes to the realization that you are not required to feel the same as she thinks “all her other pregnant friends” have felt, then apologizes – consider the situation addressed and resolved.

Reiterate to her that you are happy to have such a lovely and supportive friend but she needs to listen to you and remember that you are not required to fulfill her expectations of your behavior…she needs to modify her expectations based on your history and communication.

You mentioned she was handicapped, if I read correctly, how would she feel if she had a friend who was always comparing her handicapped limb(s) to their own sibling who was similarly handicapped? No one wants that level of scrutiny and it is unhealthy.

Tell her, in no uncertain terms, to keep her thoughts to herself on that point.” patchgrrl

Another User Comments:

“Since no one else has said it, I believe you did the play the jerk here. Not the worst one ever, and not without a reason; but jerk-ish nonetheless.

You first point out that your friend only seems to have time for you on her terms, when you weren’t even making time for her on your own terms. That’s being a jerk, but it is somewhat reasonable because you’re in the middle of moving.

You could have asked her to help, even if you already had “enough” help. She could’ve helped you specifically, or she could’ve been helping by making food for the others. Or simply assisting you, as you are portraying that you were struggling with contractions and pain; she could’ve packed your stuff, or made sure you were taken care of.

It seems she was doing everything she could to reach out to you and you wouldn’t even give her the time of day.

That’s jerk-ish, but within reason, as you were very stressed with moving and labor pains. I think you made the don’t clear to her but weren’t very clear on what she could do.

I’d be glad to have a friend like that, and wouldn’t worry about it too much as she probably understands you’re not exactly yourself at the moment.

You’re definitely in the right with the way you felt, but you were a bit of a jerk.” wolfie084

Another User Comments:

“NTJ. Your friend is being incredibly insensitive and overbearing — I can’t stand unannounced visitors and I’m not 1.

pregnant, 2. moving, or 3. dealing with the holidays. I was taught showing up like that was incredibly rude anyway. She’s being pushy and intrusive and her constant need for updates puts her desire to know above your own needs and creates more stress for you.

Is she like this all the time? If not, I’d maybe let things cool and try to talk to her later. If this is a pattern with her, I’d let the distance stand. You don’t need someone who tries to override you.

And by the way: going to the length of checking hospitals around you is super creepy.” sheath2

Another User Comments:

“You’re not at all the jerk.

You have told your friend politely over and over and over what you need and she ignores you. She does seem overly involved in this and you deserve some space. I would make sure the hospital knows that you do not want her visiting while in labor.

The nurses will help with that. After the baby is born your husband may have to stop her at the door and say, ‘thanks for stopping by, but baby and mama are sleeping and we can’t have guests, sorry.'” Viperbunny

4 points - Liked by leja2, lebe, Hypatia85 and 1 more

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rbleah 1 year ago
Friend or not she sounds smothering. AND she decided to IGNORE what YOU WANT? She sounds incredibly selfish. You are NOT THE JERK.
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12. AITJ For Refusing To Put My Daughter In A New Class Just To Appease Another Mom?


“My daughter is 5 and just started grade 1. My friend’s kid is also starting the same year but in another class. My friend and I picked up our kids from the same daycare so we aren’t super close but our kids get along so we have occasional play dates.

A few days into the start of school my friend complained to the principal that she wants her kid taken out of the classroom she was assigned because the teacher was too young and didn’t have kids.

Didn’t say anything about teaching ability but just that the teacher was 24 and too young to be a teacher and she didn’t have kids so she shouldn’t teach her child. The principal refused to switch them because the class size was balanced between the homerooms and said he would only switch her with another kid so one teacher doesn’t get more work.

So she called me and demanded I agreed to swap my child’s classroom for hers. I asked my daughter if she wants to swap and she said no she made lots of friends (it’s been over a week since the start of school) and she doesn’t want to leave.

I called her back to tell her I wasn’t swapping and she got angry and ranted about how her child deserved a good education and a 24-year-old has no business in the classroom. I asked her if she believes her child’s teacher isn’t good then why should I let my daughter into her class? She hung up and then came to class the next day to tell the teachers I had agreed to the switch and the teachers called me and I denied it and told them not to take my daughter out of her class.

She called me several times and I’ve ignored her.”

Another User Comments:

“NTJ, she sounds like a bad friend.

My sister started teaching 2nd grade when she was 23 (most of the kids in her class were 7 years old at the start of the school year).

I remember one mom got really upset at my sister, saying ‘You’re the same age as me, you’re not old enough to teach this class!’ My sister replied with ‘How are you old enough to have a 7-year-old, but I’m not old enough to teach them?’ Shut that mom up pretty quickly…” makethatnoise

Another User Comments:

“NTJ, but I agree with other comments – talk to the principal as well, and make sure the school knows you did not start this or push it.

That this parent is lying to the school because of whatever preconceived notions she has about this teacher being ‘unfit.’

And on that topic, I’d bet that it has nothing to do with this teacher being 24, and everything to do with the fact that this teacher doesn’t have kids.

The fact that this woman specifically mentioned the teacher not having kids of her own (and that making her unfit to teach) is a big red flag, and tbh, it’s something you probably want to make the school aware of.

This mother might decide to hold a grudge or vendetta against the teacher, and she’s already proven that she has zero qualms about lying to try and get what she wants. I’m worried she might try to make up a lie in order to discredit the teacher’s reputation or get her fired…

The school ought to know that the mother has made a baseless assumption drawn from the fact that this teacher simply doesn’t have kids. I don’t know if the teacher is childfree or simply childless…

either way, that’s her choice and has zero impact on her teaching skills. However, a lot of people can get pretty nasty when the ‘life script’ isn’t followed. And there are plenty of people with kids who believe childfree people all hate children or don’t care about their safety.

Best to make the school aware of the problem now, before it becomes worse.” yalldointoomuch

Another User Comments:


Your friend is a nightmare parent. I say this as a teacher.

Wanna know the overall stereotype of who the most dedicated teachers are? The young and childless.

They are still optimistic and aren’t quite as jaded with the profession yet, are idealistic, will use the most current trends since they’re fresh out of school, often overcompensate because they are trying to gain permanent contracts, feel the pressure to be Pinterest worthy, etc.

And they don’t have their own kids so are more able to put more of their evening and money back into their classroom.

Are they inexperienced? Yes. But it doesn’t make them ‘worse’. As we each age and grow and change our families and philosophies our classrooms and approaches will change. But it doesn’t mean we get better OR worse. We just have changing priorities.” Ohcrumbcakes

4 points - Liked by olderandwiser, leja2, lebe and 2 more

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Woogiesmom721 10 months ago
I definitely would not consider this idiot of a woman as a friend.
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11. AITJ For Not Doing My Mom's Paper For Her?


“A little back story…. My mom was born in the Dominican Republic. She grew up in a relatively poor family of farmers. In 1984, she came to the states to pursue a better life for herself and her four younger brothers.

When she came here, despite English not being her first language, she managed to complete high school in 3 years. She did later attempt to attend college and managed to complete three semesters. However, college did not come without a hefty price.

College was too expensive for her while she assisted her parents and her younger brothers in paying the bills. It was a luxury she simply couldn’t afford. Not having a college degree in today’s day and age can’t get you far, as we all know.

Before the time she enrolled, she was laid off. She figured getting a college degree would help her chances of finding a new job (she found one, but not as good as the last one.)

We enrolled, at different colleges, around the same time…..

And that’s when the conflicts started. Like I said, English isn’t her first language. She can speak and read it well enough, but god forbid she needs to write something down. So that’s where I come in.

And holy crap, can the timing be bad. I have to constantly write her papers when I also had my own papers to write. It was tough, but she’s my mom, so I sucked it up.

Although, last semester she needed me to write her a 7-page essay that was due the same week as finals week. (Required a lot of time-consuming research). Granted, I did it. And I still managed to ace my courses.

But my god was I stressed and exhausted. That was a rough week. And I was kind of furious because it almost compromised my chances of passing my classes. I told her, after that week, that I can only help her so much now since my courses are getting more and more difficult and I need to devote more time to them.

She told me she understands and will lessen the requests.

Fast forward to this week, I have two very big midterms. If I mess up on these tests, I just literally wasted my entire semester.

So I’m in hardcore study mode. Screw my friends, screw my family, screw my life. I NEED to pass these tests. And, of course, my mom has an essay due on the day of one of the tests.

It’s also a big part of her grade. Due to my situation, I simply flat-out said no.

Me: “Mom, I really want to help you, I do. But I cannot afford to fail these tests.”

Mom: “Please OP, I really need this too.

Can’t you squeeze it into your schedule? You’re better at this than I am. It’ll only take you a couple of hours.”

Me: “Mom, these are hours I can’t afford to waste. I want to help you, but I can’t put my grades at risk.

You’re asking me to choose between my future and yours.” So, I didn’t do it. I just refused to do her paper.

Mom: “You’re a terrible son! I work my butt off to support you!” (She does.

It’s just her and me. She’s a single mom and one of the hardest working people I know. We struggle to get by, but we manage.) “And you can’t even do this for me?!”

Me: “Mom, I’m sorry.

I just can’t do it. I need you to understand that I have my own things to do.” She is angry, I’m angry. We are all angry. We haven’t spoken all day. I don’t know, I feel terrible that I can’t finish her paper, but at the same time, I can’t compromise my own grades for her own.

Am I the jerk for not doing her paper?

EDIT: I should mention that, while yes, the school offers her support. But she is a single mom who has a full-time job. She is also a landlady who owns two homes that she needs to maintain.

She simply doesn’t have enough time to take advantage of these resources or frankly to do the work on time.”

Another User Comments:

“No, you’re not the jerk. How you handle it is obviously important, you could handle it like a jerk, but you aren’t a jerk for not doing it for her.

Does your mother realize that they have support for people who need it? If English isn’t your first language, there are people who help you. I don’t know if her college has them on campus, but you can hire them if they aren’t.

You can’t write the papers for her or do the research. You should only be assisting her with English, so what she’s asking you to do is wrong, anyway. Also, I know she’s your mother, but she is a little bit of a jerk for leaving things that late.

Especially after you warned her.” Lamenardo

Another User Comments:

“She is the jerk. Nobody who is unable to write in English should be getting good grades in courses that require being able to write in English, nor do they deserve a grade they didn’t earn.

It’s unfair to her classmates who, you know, actually DO the assignments. If her professors knew she was guilting her son into writing her papers (PLAGIARISM) she would get an automatic failing grade.

On the other hand, I do want to sympathize with her being a hard worker.

Maybe you should step up and help her with landlord duties from time to time or pick up a part-time job to help her with expenses.” synyk_hiphop

Another User Comments:

“She needs to reduce her study load, no question.

She also needs to step up and start working to improve her written English because, as you know, it’s not like things will get easier as she progresses. Together you are creating her dependency on you.

‘Give a mom a paper and she’ll pass for a grade; teach a mom to write and she’ll pass her degree.'” Buffalo__Buffalo

3 points - Liked by olderandwiser, lebe and suna

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kbeaudway 1 year ago
I hate to belabor the obvious. But she is cheating. You are helping her curious. And employers who expect her to have the skills and knowledge associated with her degree will notice she doesn't have them and will fire her. If I were you, I'd tell her to write the paper on her own and you can proof it to correct her English grammar. That should take far less time and accommodates only the one thing she should need help with. The content of the course, and the paper, is on her.
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10. AITJ For Not Seeing My Partner On Her Birthday?


“So back in August I met this girl (we’ll call her Jessica). Jessica and I started talking a lot and in early September we started seeing each other. The relationship was pretty casual. We go to different schools so I would only get to see her on the weekends.

Most of the time we would watch a movie or get food together. From what I could tell we were both pretty content with the direction the relationship was headed.

Before the story starts I want to lay out a few dates to prevent confusion:

Finals Week: November 2nd-6th

SAT and Jessica’s birthday: November 7th

The first week of November was a stressful one for me.

I had to take 5 finals (trimester schedule) and the following Saturday I had the SAT (I’m a junior in high school). To add insult to injury that Saturday was also Jessica’s birthday. Obviously, I wanted to make it special for her but I knew I was going to be completely exhausted by the end of the week.

Friday after school Jessica and I were texting back and forth trying to figure out plans for her birthday tomorrow.

This was my first time taking the SAT so I told her I’d most likely be free around 1 in the afternoon. Jessica tells me that should work because the rest of the night she is going to the mall with friends and getting dinner with her family.

I also text her wishing her a happy birthday and give her a heads up that we will play tomorrow by ear because I will most likely be too exhausted to hang out. That night I purposely get to bed early with the intention to be rested enough to hang out with Jessica.

The whole night I was tossing and turning because I was so anxious about the SAT and making the day special for Jessica.

Saturday morning I’m up bright and early at 7 AM and head over to the testing center.

I text Jessica one more time wishing her a happy birthday and that I will text her once I finish the test. Overall the SAT took about 5 hours with the breaks we got in between sections.

The test officially ended at 12:50 PM and I was completely exhausted so I got in my car and drove home. At 1 PM as I was about to text Jessica she texts me asking what the plan is.

I text her back telling her that I am way too tired to hang out with her and that I need to go home and take a nap. She seems a little disappointed (which is understandable) and I text her back that I’m super sorry and that we can do something special tomorrow (she was busy the rest of the day).

Jessica wasn’t agreeing to hang out on a different day and eventually she stops responding to my texts.

Late Saturday night (like 11 PM) she texts me out of the blue asking if she can rant to me.

I tell her yes and then she proceeds to write me a number of essays about how ticked off she is at me. She complains to me about how I “blew her off on her birthday” and that I “was probably hanging out with other people anyways.” She also goes off on me about how it didn’t seem like I cared.

The first time she texted me I responded by saying how I am sorry and that if we hung out I feel like I wouldn’t have been able to make the day special for her and stuff.

She keeps texting me and isn’t accepting my apology so eventually, I stop saying I’m sorry and I try to explain my side to her. I genuinely didn’t do anything except go home, put on the TV, and fall asleep after the SAT.

She kept accusing me of not caring and I eventually just tell her we need to hang out tomorrow and work it out in person.

Sunday comes around (the day she was very adamant about being too busy to hang out) and we go out and get food at Panera.

The whole time it was kind of awkward and we were just making small talk. As I am driving her back to her house, I tell Jessica that we should probably break up. I explain to her that I really enjoy spending time with her but I don’t think it’s working out.

She agrees and I tell her that I hope we can still be friends. She seemed very content with the situation and she didn’t freak out or get mad at me. I thought we ended the relationship on pretty good terms and I thought I handled the situation pretty maturely.

On Thanksgiving, I wake up and see a text on my phone from Jessica.

She said: “Happy Thanksgiving!! So thankful we broke up!”

As soon as I read that text I got extremely ticked off and headed straight for the gym. Haven’t texted her back or contacted her in any way.

So then, am I a jerk for not hanging out with my partner on her birthday?”

Another User Comments:

“Part of being in a mature relationship is knowing your responsibilities and limitations. This might mean sometimes not being the top priority for your SO.

I opened this thread writing a reply in my head saying “You should have given her fair warning beforehand, you should have still contacted her on her birthday, and you should have negotiated with her to make it up to her on a different day” except you already did all of that.

I guess my only criticism would be that you didn’t extend an offer to hang at hers or yours to do nothing if you knew you’d be too tired but she really did want to spend some time with you to make her birthday feel special.

But that’s a minor quibble.

She didn’t communicate with you properly. She didn’t make her expectations clear. She didn’t negotiate. She didn’t seek a compromise. The fault is with her in my opinion.

You have to know your limits and draw your boundaries in a relationship.

You did just that. I don’t know what you’re like, but if you get cranky or upset when you’re tired then maybe by not going out with her friends for her birthday you avoided acting like a jerk and getting into a fight.

Or maybe you avoided moping and ruining everyone else’s fun. Regardless you told her what you were capable of and she wasn’t okay with that and didn’t tell you. Then she got all jealous and started making accusations and stuff.

Not cool. Then there’s that thanksgiving text…

I think you should have told her earlier on that there was no chance of hanging out on Saturday but if you miraculously float through the whole ordeal you’ll let her know just so that you’ve set a clear expectation, but that’s the kind of thing that comes more easily when you’ve got more relationship experience under your belt.

I don’t think you’re a jerk.” Buffalo__Buffalo

Another User Comments:


You should have taken the SAT at a different time to begin with.

You upset her, she wasn’t able to deal with that in a good way (that it was her birthday probably made that worse), and provoked you into upsetting her further.

And then you broke up with her. I would not be so sure that she was not mad at you when she seemed content with the situation.

It might have been entirely possible to avoid the situation by at least meeting her Saturday.

You didn’t have to take a nap at your house, either. But telling her over text that there would be nothing was probably very upsetting.

On Thanksgiving, she’d probably had a lot of time to stew over the situation.

Now she’s switched into crazy ex mode from all the resentment.” Transfuturist

Another User Comments:

“You were so tired you had to go home immediately after the test, but you were awake Saturday night at 11:00? You’re definitely the jerk.

Plus you kinda ruined her birthday. But that’s okay because now is the time to learn. You have to understand that sometimes your SO has to come before you, even if you’re exhausted. Yeah, maybe you wouldn’t have been much fun but the fact that you show up is incredibly important.

Make a girl’s birthday a number one priority. Plus, unless you had been thinking about breaking up with her before, you acted rashly. Don’t break up just because you have an argument because you’ll end up in an on-off relationship, which is a trainwreck and never works out.

Don’t do that.

As for your ex, she’s obviously very immature and can’t handle your emotions. Take that as an example of how not to act. Be in control of your emotions and don’t send stupid crap like that.

It’s pathetic.” thatguyrex

Another User Comments:

“Nope, not at all. If you’d told her you would hang out with her, then blew her off with no context, then yeah, you’d be a jerk. You had perfectly reasonable grounds, and you explained your points clearly.

She cared more about having you there than your future and aspirations, all over one day. A test that was important to you, and one of her many birthdays. If you’d have met up with her on the day, and been tired and lethargic, she’d be just as angry.

There’s no winning here. She’s selfish and self-absorbed and doesn’t care to see it from your side. Also about the texts, she’s not over it and looking for an argument. Not only are you not a jerk, but you’re also a lucky duck for getting out of that.

Delete the number and don’t respond. You sound like a nice, reasonable, caring person, who goes for psychos. Look for red flags early on, people like that tend to fly them high.” IamA_KoalaBear

3 points - Liked by olderandwiser, lebe and Morning

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Breezer2800 1 year ago (Edited)
NTJ. The people saying OP is wrong are clueless.

SAT's aren't just a casual thing that you can reschedule last minute.
There's actually a deadline for that.
So the person who said "you could've rescheduled" is wrong.

Second, OP could have taken a nap after the getting home from the SAT's, which would explain why they were up at 11 that night, so that's not justification AT ALL for labeling OP a jerk. That person was wrong too.

She was completely in the wrong. OP literally did everything he could to let her know he might not be available, and that he'd be willing to hang out with her the next day to make it up to her.

But that wasn't good enough, so instead she chose to go radio silent.
That's a complete lack of communication on her part, and that's usually one of the biggest reasons why relationships fail.

Fast forward, they broke up because they were unable to properly communicate, and then she decided send a spiteful text on Thanksgiving.
This all just shows how immature she is and that she's not ready for a serious relationship, which isn't surprising since we're talking about teens here.

OP needs to just block her number and move on, because the "remaining friends" thing clearly isn't going to work.
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9. AITJ For Canceling My Wedding After My Family Insulted My Relationship?


“My wedding is supposed to be at the end of this month but I’m planning to cancel everything and have a courthouse wedding because my cousin told me my family was making bets on how long it would take my fiancé to realize he wasn’t getting the ‘good little wife’ he was expecting and regret marrying me.

When I confronted them, they said it was just a harmless joke and that I didn’t have the personality to be a submissive housewife which a man like my fiancé would obviously want. My sister-in-law made a joke about making sure my fiancé didn’t realize until after the wedding while I was confronting them.

I was already upset but her joke just made it 10x worse and I told everybody I was going to cancel the wedding. My family told me I couldn’t do that because people would talk and my future in-laws wouldn’t be happy about it but I told them I didn’t care and they could tell everybody why I never had a wedding ceremony.

My parents are telling me not to cancel the wedding as I would regret it in the long run and it would be embarrassing for our family and me for it to be canceled now but I’m not backing down.


Another User Comments:

“NTJ. It is unkind that your family was all standing around making bets on when your marriage would end, though I do think you should take a quick second to analyze whether or not they are saying anything of merit.

If you do think there’s a glimmer of truth that the man you are marrying wants someone to fit a role in his life, rather than wanting to marry you, perhaps you should make a more firm hold on the wedding plans.

If you do want to move forward with marrying him, the metric you need to consider is are enough of your friends and family on his side coming that it would be worth still having the wedding? If you disinvited all of your family who participated in this, would there still be enough people for you to have a fun event?

If not, do a courthouse wedding with your in-laws, and then just have a party with those people.

You’re still having a ceremony that your in-laws can see, and you don’t have to involve your family” JCBashBash

Another User Comments:


Your family for obvious reasons.

You for thinking it is your choice unilaterally, doesn’t your husband get a say in this? Perhaps he would still like his family there, it’s not all about you.” IHaveSaidMyPiece

Another User Comments:


It’s for lack of a better word kinda pathetic to cancel the wedding because of family opinions.

You wanted the wedding – you have the wedding. You want to elope – elope. Why are you even discussing it with family and not with your fiance?

Absolutely screw that notion of a ‘good little wife’ (whatever that means), but in a twisted paradox, they are right.

They got under your skin and you didn’t even make it to the wedding to throw everything upside down on a whim.” Substantial_Date_38

Another User Comments:

“NTJ if you uninvite your family and keep the wedding for your SO and his family.

(If you were my friend and I wasn’t a bridesmaid you’d best bet I would stand at the doors and bar entrance to your family.) You can hire security to keep them out.

If your family has helped pay for the wedding; if you can reimburse them do it and make sure they know why they aren’t invited anymore.

It’s a terrible bet and they’re jerks for it. If you all are paying have your party and celebrate it with people who respect the two of you.

Just make sure all vendors know who can and can’t make changes for you (passwords or codes or something).

But at the end of the day; if canceling gives your soul peace do it. Courthouse marriages can last longer than marriages that had large events. It’s about the people getting married – not how they got married that matters.” Terra88draco

2 points - Liked by olderandwiser and leja2

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rbleah 1 year ago
Invite his parents and sibs to the courthouse and NOT your jerk family AT ALL. After go for a nice meal with HIS fam and be done. Congrats and have a good life.
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8. AITJ For Going Against My Boss?


“I’ve been upper level with an online group for over three years, I’m currently one of the most senior members and have been involved from the revitalization to present through all of our projects.

We deal with an ever-changing field of topics. We’ve done card game development, game convention management, and hosted game servers. We’ve also done plenty of streaming and youtube.

Recently, we’ve had a sharp drop in community size, as we no longer have any public projects retaining or bringing in new members.

We hosted a Teamspeak server for over a year but recently switched to Discord.

Teamspeak 3 and Discord are voiceover IP programs, used to communicate with each other, as well as leave plenty of space for community members to hang out and do whatever.

The community is sort of split between a main group consisting of fans for streams and content, and my sub-group which is a slightly older gang of friends that have ended up here for one reason or another over the years.

In our current state, I don’t do much for the group besides moderate the Discord and deal with my own side business.

Here’s the important part: Recently, I’ve had lots of trouble with one member of the main group.

Spamming, posting NSFW content, etc. After warning him multiple times, he and three friends decided it would be funny to spam the heck out of the chat channels. In discord, chat channels are all public and you are by default notified of chat messages, which appear as desktop notifications.

I got on and saw the absolute mess, with a few messages asking them to stop, but no dice.

I do my job and remove the main issue from the server permanently. I then remove the other three for the remainder of the day.

As I usually do, I left messages in the admin chat explaining that I had removed them.

Later in the night owner (my boss) hopped on and told me off for eviscerating the remains of the community.

I insist that without a community project, we can have a friendly community or retain all of our members. He gets passive-aggressive about how he wants to work on the project that he’s doing and tells me to go about my business (clearly not happy with how I’m doing it.)

The move was a bold one.

Those four function similarly to me in my own group. By removing them, even temporarily it seems as though they’ve taken the entirety of their friends (a large chunk of our daily user base) and gone off to start their own discord.

They don’t provide us with anything, but if you work in this way you know that losing a community member means that they won’t recruit for you. A large community draws people in on its own and missing out on those guys is a possible future issue.

Was it the right decision to remove members for misconduct and hurt the company, or should I have let them continue like the boss wanted?”

Another User Comments:

“Much like all the metadrama around here involving moderation, without more proof one way or the other there’s not much to really go on.

If your description of events is accurate, then you were probably in the right if it’s more important for your company mandate to foster a positive community than a “popular” one. If the company has no such mandate, or its mission statement specifically ignores it, you’re in the wrong.

BUT even if you ARE in the right, I can’t say for sure that things went down like you say they did, so you might still be in the wrong.

Basically, you MIGHT not be the jerk, but that’s only if your version of events is accurate, and your view of the company’s direction is in line with the actual company’s direction.” robotronica

Another User Comments:

“No, but if he’s your boss it doesn’t matter.

This is really something a third party can’t make a judgment on and it sounds like you need to have a discussion with your boss to determine if you and your company have aligned goals in mind.

If not, it may be time for you to move on, since you aren’t the company owner.

I would’ve done the same if I were in your position, and I don’t think you’re the jerk, but you aren’t the boss and so don’t get to decide how to run the company. For better or worse, that’s business.” billyalt

1 points - Liked by lebe

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Woogiesmom721 10 months ago
Considering that I have no clue what I just read I can't say YTJ or NTJ.
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7. AITJ For Wanting My Housemate To Be More Responsible?


“My housemate ‘Anna’ and I moved in together 1.5 years ago. At the time we talked about expectations a lot. I made it very clear that I do like cats (she has two) but that I want 0! responsibility for them and asked how well she takes care of them.

Anna agreed to the first thing and said she takes really excellent care of her cats.

Since then this stuff has happened:

  • Cats have escaped onto the street a few times at the beginning (dangerous) or up our big stairwell, had to lure/chase them back in many times.
  • Cats peed on a neighbor’s welcome mat, Anna bought them a new one but took her a while.

Turns out the cats are a bit damaged since their first owner sucked.

Not Anna’s or the cats’ fault! But: We all had quite a lot of nights where we slept like crap because the cats can be very loud and needy right outside my door. In the courtyard, they also make quite some penetrating noise.

Some of our neighbors love our cats but I am sure some are annoyed as heck by them or at least the noise and crap. We live in a large block with an inner courtyard and many young people.

At least one young couple with a baby dislikes her (us?). They said Hi and acted nice in the beginning. This is according to Anna. This couple happens to get the majority of the cat crap in front of their ground-floor apartment since there is some earth there..

I have tried to put cats and cat litter boxes in the closed kitchen only for the night, and when we do, 9 out of 10 times cats are chill and quiet and we sleep just fine.

Anna has done this sometimes too but is a bit inconsistent, despite me asking if we could always do it since I need my sleep. She likes the cats to be able to walk in and out of her room and bed at night.

But her open door is right next to my closed one and the cats can be really noisy, our doors are not good.

I have had to take care of some of the cats now and then.

Not a lot but more than I initially agreed. Anna likes to go out, sometimes she will stay out all night or come home very late, and then the cats are very vocal, and want their food.

Have to wait on it for 2 to 10 hours compared to their normal feeding time. So have fed them sometimes and cleaned the catbox a few times. If this was the only issue I honestly would not mind, I would be flexible.

Anna does me favors too sometimes.

Cats have crapped and peed dozens of times and sometimes puked in the courtyard (are allowed to go there). Most of that crap stayed there even though I talked about it with Anna.

She picked up very little or none. Now, months after we discussed it (and we are both away on long-term vacations) we get a letter from the landlord saying they have received various complaints from our neighbors.

Landlord says if the problem persists it might mean she can no longer have the cats.

At this moment Anna is far away on a vacation for some months. She left our other (temporary) housemate in charge of taking care of the cats.

Personally, I think this guy is rather irresponsible and is very young, but yeah he lives there and who else can you ask to mind cats daily for months..? Anna knows I think him a bit irresponsible.

He already replied over social media he does not think the cat crap needs to be picked up really since this is the first complaint/first time he heard about it and a neighbor already cleaned some crap for us..

Anna is one of my very best friends! I love that girl but I do think sometimes she is waaaaay too easygoing about stuff like the cats.

With one or two things she does not respond to or see the problems she causes for others until there is a huge consequence and even then she sometimes does little. Like right now all she has suggested is we buy a spray that is intended to prevent cats from crapping in the courtyard, does this work? At the moment, she has no solutions for the existing crap that is there…

How do I get Anna to change and be way more attentive and take better care of the cats without straining our friendship? Of course, I have talked to her about this and 1 or 2 other responsibility-type issues, but it almost never ends well.

She will think I worry too much or am too demanding or become sad. Criticizing how someone takes care of their pets is often like telling a parent they need to raise their kids better,…

does not get a great response generally, almost nobody thinks or admits they are not doing a good job. I prefer not to live being stressed about stuff that is not my responsibility or being seen as a jerk by others, landlord and neighbors are not really aware they are not my cats.


am I the jerk and expecting too much? Should I just take it all in stride and simply ignore and distance myself from the whole thing all together? How?”

Another User Comments:

“You’re not a jerk at all.

This girl does not understand the responsibility that comes with keeping animals and unfortunately she needs some serious tough love about it. Stay strong and stick to your guns because asking someone to care for their own pet is never unreasonable.” Reddit user

1 points - Liked by jessi39mae

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rbleah 1 year ago
Tell her either she takes care of the cats or they have to go. If she does not like this then she can choose to leave with them and you can find another roommate. Tell her she agreed to NOT make this your problem and has NOT made sure she adheres to the agreement.
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6. AITJ For Accusing My Son's Bio Dad Of Threatening Him?


“Firstly, I NEVER refer to my son as my stepson. He and his mother are the loves of my life and I am a better man for having them in my life. I have raised him, let’s call him “Mario”, with my wife for the last seven years, he’s ten now.

His biological dad, let’s call him “Frank”, has no interest in him and only has visitation because HIS mother wanted to see her grandson so she hired a lawyer for “Frank” and now “Frank” sees “Mario” every other weekend.

Nearly every visit ends much sooner than the 48 hours it is supposed to, mainly because “Frank” “has plans”. He was verbally and emotionally horrible to my wife when the two of them were a couple so now I do all the communicating with “Frank” so he can’t hurt my wife.

Well now “Frank” is married and his wife wants kids but “Frank” does not and has made it clear he doesn’t want to be around the one child he has fathered. After all these years he acts as a buddy, not a parent, to “Mario”.

So this last Sunday when we go pick up “Mario” and after he tells us about his time with his bio-dad I mention that Star Wars is opening this week and ask if he is interested in seeing it.

He says, “Frank said I can’t see it with you because I have to see it with him. I really don’t want to see it anymore.” After a little bit, my son just busts out that he was excited to see it but after he was told that he couldn’t see it with his mother and me and that he’ll be in trouble with his bio-dad if he does he just lost all interest.

The sadness in his voice was crushing.

Skip to today. It’d been bothering me and I couldn’t contain it. I text his bio-dad and step-mom and ask if what my son said was true about “Mario” not being allowed to see the movie with his mother and me.

I get a series of messages back about how I am a jerk for taking him to the movie “after they have had tickets for months and have been planning this ‘Father/Son’ bonding event”.

I NEVER said I was taking him. I very straightforwardly asked if “Mario” was threatened with punishment and if he had been forbidden from going to see it with his mother and me. Once the profanity started and my question was still never answered I ended the texting conversation with, “Please do not ever cuss me.

See you next week”. “Frank” texts back, “I’ll do you one better. Stop texting or communicating with me. I’m his dad and “Marie” is his mom. If it’s something regarding “Mario” she can speak to me from now on.” Well the whole reason I communicate with him is to protect my wife from his irrational abusiveness so, no she will not be communicating with him.

I am afraid there will be repercussions when my son sees his bio-dad next week for Christmas, but there really is nothing I can do about that.

Beating the life out of the guy is obviously not an option (as satisfying, though too easy, as it may be).

Am I the jerk for asking if my son’s bio-dad threatened him with punishment if I took him to see Star Wars?”

Another User Comments:

“Yes, you’re a jerk for a variety of reasons.

1: You’re needlessly starting stuff a week before Christmas: First of all, ten-year-olds (and I’ve had four of them so far) don’t tell you what people said, they tell you what they felt like people said, so you don’t know if there were any “threats” made or not.

It would’ve been easy for you to text the guy and say: “Are you planning to take KID to see the new Star Wars movie next week? If you’re not, I’m going to take him and MOM to see it”.

That gets you the answer you need, without starting any pointless drama. But no, you decided to confront KID’s dad about it when, even if you’re right, it’s absolutely pointless, and puts your wife in the position of having to deal with her abusive ex, on Christmas.

This leads me to reason number 2…

2: Elementary, my dear jerk: Let’s say for the sake of argument that KID was giving you an accurate representation of what happened. Let’s say that his dad told him that if he goes to see the new Star Wars movie with anyone but him, then he’s in big trouble.

Are you seriously under the impression that he (KID’s dad) was going to tell you… in a text message? Really?

And even if by some chance he does, so what? What exactly are you going to do about it? Hmm? As KID’s parent, he’s perfectly within his rights to tell KID he can’t see a movie.

You have no evidence at all that KID is in any imminent physical danger, or harm of any kind. His visitation is court-ordered, so you have no authority to do anything.

I’m a step-father to two kids myself – trust me, I know how the system works.

If you want to modify visitation, you’re going to need a darn good reason (which you don’t have), and you’re going to have to schedule a hearing which there is no way you’re getting before the first of the year; March – maybe February at the earliest, is much more likely.

The most you could do would be to get a Temporary Order of Protection (which you won’t get) and even if you do get it, it’s going to get thrown out if he contests it because, again, you’ve got nothing.

3: You lost before the game ever started: You’ll notice that throughout this post, I’ve referred to him as KID’s father, or KID’s dad, that’s because that’s what he is.

Now as I said earlier, I’ve got two step-children of my own and I love them both every bit as much as my biological children, but I’m their step-father, not their father. You can make all the arguments you want about how you raised KID, or how bad his father is – I get it, really I do, and for most people that argument might hold some weight, but it never will to him.

To him, you’re just the guy sleeping with the KID’s mother, and that’s all you’re ever going to be. Now 99.9% of the time, you probably have no craps to give about his opinion, but this is one of those .01% times that it’s going to be an issue.

So not only did you pick a battle you can’t win, but it’s one you can’t even fight because you’ve got zero authority to override a court order, absolutely no evidence of wrongdoing, and no chance of getting this handled before Christmas.

So yes, you’re the jerk.

A loving, well-intentioned jerk, sure, but a jerk nonetheless.” BadWolf_Corporation

Another User Comments:

“I’d say you’re not the jerk only because the dude is married and he could have kids to spend time with but he probably only wants to see your kid because he doesn’t have to be with him “full time”. Though you probably shouldn’t have started this now.” plinywaves

1 points - Liked by lebe

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Theflamazing1 1 year ago
Ntj. Anyone who says you have no say in parenting is wrong. You and your wife have raised your son. Frank is a jerk. He is certainly nothing more than a sperm donor. Document everything and go back to court for full custody.
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5. AITJ For Trying To Get A Recording?


“I’m taking a film/video production program in college, and my school also has an audio engineering program. We have a recording studio which is mainly used by the audio engineering students but is also available to film/video students for recording things like narration, dialogue replacement, sound effects, etc.

The studio consists of two separate rooms― a control room where the engineer works and a live room where the talent performs.

The rooms can be used together, with the engineer in the control room and the talent performing in the live room as in a real recording session.

But the live room also contains its own audio workstation for students working alone or in groups that don’t want to use the control room for whatever reason.

The studio is available on a first-come, first-served basis unless you’ve made a reservation with the equipment operator.

In other words, you can use the studio without a reservation if no one’s in there already, but you have to give it up if someone with a reservation shows up. Because you can record using just one room or with both, the rooms can be booked together or individually.

Recently I went into the control room to copy a project off the computer that I had worked on earlier.

I noticed a group in the live room using a separate audio workstation. I needed to record a narration for one of my final assignments and assumed that the group must have a reservation, so I asked the equipment operator when their reservation ended.

Surprisingly, he told me they didn’t have a reservation.

With no way of knowing when they’d be done, I decided to make the recording in one of the computer labs. Normally the lab used for audio work has a microphone stand lying around, but on this day it was missing and the equipment operator said the stands in the studio shouldn’t be moved and he didn’t know where I could get one.

(Recording mics can’t be handheld as they are extremely sensitive and the movement would generate noise in the recording.)

When I passed by the studio I noticed the group had left to take a break, so I decided to try to do my recording real quick and try to finish it and leave before they came back.

They returned just as I was about to start recording. I explained about the mic stand predicament and admitted I was hoping to have finished before they returned. I explained that I saved their project and hadn’t moved any of their equipment and asked if it was OK for me to do it real quick.

They told me they were pressed for time and might not be done for many more hours (not unusual for a final project).

One of them seemed irritated, but another told me it was fine to move the mic stand as long as I brought it back, so I grabbed my stuff and went back upstairs.

I had to interrupt them twice more, once to grab the USB drive that I had forgotten, and once after I finished to return the stand I borrowed. I realized that getting their attention without actually interrupting them during a take would be a real conundrum since I couldn’t hear what they were saying through the window.

I ended up peeking through the window to make sure they weren’t in the middle of a take before opening the door.

I understand that this would be totally inappropriate if they had the room reserved, but since they didn’t, AITJ?”

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suna 1 year ago
NTJ. They didn’t have a reservation. You were polite and didn’t interrupt any live work.
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4. AITJ For Kicking My Cousin Out After Her Kids Destroyed My Daughter's Stuff?


“I 33m and my wife 31, have four kids together. Our oldest is 14 and she has severe eczema that she was born with. She recently started using this soap for her eczema which was prescribed by her doctor.

And it’s over the counter, but I don’t remember the brand. And she has a white towel that she can’t share with anyone else as directed by her dermatologist. My cousin was staying with us for the weekend, and she’s 32.

She has 2 kids that are 13 and 11.

We had spent the day at the park, so you know all the kids are dirty and sweaty. And they all need a shower. Well, my three youngest went first, then my cousin’s 11-year-old, then the 13-year-old.

My oldest goes to get in the shower, and about 3 minutes later she comes stomping out the back. With her towel, soap, and eczema cream in hand. Turns out my cousin’s kids used her towel, even though we gave them towels to use.

Not only that but they had poured her soap on the towel and into the sink and toilet. And her eczema cream which has steroids in it was rubbed into the towel and their skin and on the mirror and toilet and tub.

My daughter is angry rightfully so, and we’re all confused. So we asked all the kids who did it. It wasn’t my youngest three because they said her stuff was put away in the cabinets like normal, and the actual youngest is 3 years old and gets bathed by her mother and me.

So my cousin’s kids confess to having done it, and my wife and daughter are angry. So their mother was just watching us ask all the kids, and I asked her what she was gonna do about them.

And she told me ‘they didn’t do anything wrong and that they’re just kids.’ And that she doesn’t know what I want her to do about it. So I blew up at her and said ‘your kids are 13 and 11.

Not 3 and 1, and for them to do that is horrendous. Not only that but I expect you to replace what they destroyed.’ The steroid cream is about $65 and the soap is about $30, while the towel was only about $10.

But she got mad and said that I can’t expect a single mother to pull $105 out of her butt like that. I then told her that I didn’t care about her being a single mother and told her to take her kids home.

And she did leave albeit angrily. After that, I got a couple of angry texts from her mother saying that the kids didn’t do anything wrong and that she shouldn’t be expected to replace the stuff because she’s a single mother.

So AITJ for making them go home?

Edit: So I got my money from my cousin and her mother. They split the amount down the middle after multiple threats from my wife and me about small claims court.

Their father was made aware of what they did and actually bought a few gifts for my daughter as a way to say sorry. Not only that but the kids had been forced to apologize over the phone by their father, and he said that whatever money they get goes to her until they reach $105.

Even though I tried to tell him no about the payment with the kids he insisted saying it was the least he could do. Not only that but they’re no longer allowed in my home, and won’t be allowed in my home ever again.”

Another User Comments:


The biggest thing is that your cousin thought there was nothing wrong with her kids going through your cabinets and destroying other people’s things.

If she apologized, spoke to her kids, made them apologize, etc, and then told you she’s struggling and can’t afford $100 (and you could), that’d be a different situation. But she didn’t care at all….you shouldn’t trust them in your house again.” Usrname52

Another User Comments:

“Firstly, NTJ in the slightest.

Secondly, I’m just… shocked by how malicious this was. Her kids actively sought out your daughter’s belongings and then went through the process of destroying or ruining each one of the products she needs for her skin.

This was active bullying against your daughter and her condition considering what they ruined and how they ruined it.

I’ve seen you mention she’s raising bullies and I fully agree. I gotta ask, did you specifically tell them not to touch those items or ever previously mention them? Because based on the post it doesn’t sound like you did since they were already in spots that weren’t super accessible or necessary to look through.

If you did say not to touch them, it could’ve been them being spiteful in ruining them. If you haven’t then they had to be told by someone about those products to look for them.

Just something to keep an eye on–have your cousin’s kids ever made comments about your daughter’s eczema? Or your cousin? Your daughter probably would have already told you but it really couldn’t hurt asking her if they’ve ever said something to her.” SophiChuZilla

Another User Comments:


As a single mom, I’m even more astonished that she is using her status as an excuse.

What does being a single parent have to do with paying for damages caused by your child?

Funny enough, I would tell my little one (2 at the time) that he can’t use his grandparents’ tablet.

The grandparents would give it to him, followed by me reciting my disclaimer: ‘As he is too young to be careful with your belongings, and you are giving him the tablet against my wishes, I am not responsible for any damages, repairs or purchases made with or without your knowledge.’

The kids in the scenario are 13 and 11…. their behavior is indicative of larger issues here and the fact that the mom completely dismissed it is more concerning.” MysteriousPraline468

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lico1 1 year ago
wacky your cousin and interesting her kids. They ALL knew, including the kids what was allowed.
And that "single mom" bullshit, you know what happens to single moms that dont take care of their kids? They LOSE them.
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3. AITJ For The Way I Quit My Job?


“This is basically what happened. The General Manager and I struck a deal for me to stay working at Popeyes as a cook. I was going to quit, but we are so understaffed that the GM wanted me to stay until a replacement was found.

The deal (which was made by the GM), was that I would need to stay working there until a replacement was found, and in return, I would get a third day off and a raise of 35 cents.

For four weeks straight I got the third day off, but not the fifth/last week I’d work there. That fifth week was a day that we would have an inspection done by the owner of the restaurant and a couple of other people.

Without telling me that I would need to work an extra day that week, the GM puts me to work for five days. This wouldn’t have been a problem if it was the first time this happened.

When I saw the schedule on Monday, it was still being reworked, but I did see my name and the times I would work. I thought that he was working on it, so I didn’t really think much of it.

The next day I worked, I noticed that he hadn’t changed a single thing from what I had seen the day before. I thought that it was odd that he would do this since it was a deal that he made the conditions for.

The whole time I worked that day, I couldn’t stop thinking about the reason he could have gone back on the deal, without telling me. I assumed it was because of the inspection we were having.

This eased my mind until I remembered that I had done a deal with him before, that he went back on, after the fourth week. This knowledge made me think hard about the last time.

I started to think of the pattern that these two shared. Four weeks of him going through with the deal, not getting it the fifth week, getting it again on the sixth week, and then never getting it again after that.

This realization made me believe that it was going to happen again. I didn’t want it to, so after a day of talking about it with my family, I decided that I would quit at the end of the week.

The next time I worked, I told every co-worker that I was going to leave at the end of the week and why I was doing it. (I wanted to have a nice goodbye between me and the other workers that I enjoyed working with.) I also asked them to do me the favor of not telling the GM I was leaving till my last day.

I did this since I didn’t believe that the GM deserved a heads up about me quitting since he went back on the deal. I did this until my last day.

On the morning of my last day, I came to work with a type of cake that I would bring whenever it was someone’s last day of work.

When he saw this cake, he knew something was up. He asks me about the cake, and I respond by saying that it was my last day. He gets surprised and wants to know why.

I explain my reasonings and end it by saying that I didn’t want to work for someone who would keep going back on deals after the fourth week. He protested by saying that he thought that I would understand.

I did understand, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.

This small section is about me actually being a jerk. Throughout my last day working there, any time the GM would mention him being able to make deals with people and being able to follow through, I would go very out of my way to mention that he could not follow through after the fourth week.

It didn’t matter if he was talking with an employee, customer, or one of his friends, I would mention this.”

Another User Comments:

“The GM screwed up. Sliding that extra day on your schedule when he agreed not to wasn’t cool.

He either thought he could get away with it, or he forgot he’d made the arrangement. If he wanted you to work the extra day, he should have come to you like a mammal and asked you.

It’s understandable that you were upset.

But, if you had talked to him about it when the schedule was first up, a lot of this could have been avoided. Yeah, in your head, you probably feel like you shouldn’t have had to, but in the real world, you have to accept that management makes mistakes.

Often, your boss isn’t as smart as you, and that’s okay, working with that is a skill. If you had reminded him of your deal, there is a good chance he would have adjusted things.

You took the schedule as a personal attack, you made sure everyone else knew about it, except the boss.

The cake? That was a bit much, and between that and the comments you were making, you were rubbing his nose in it a bit. It’s pretty classic passive-aggressive behavior, and in the workplace, it will often keep you from getting the things you want.

It’s Popeye’s, it’s not the end of the world, but you ended up leaving on bad terms more or less to prove a point, and that only hurts you.

So yeah, everybody sucks on this one.

Your boss is either an idiot or a jerk (or both!), but you could have handled it more straightforwardly without the dramatic exit.” Reddit user

Another User Comments:

“You’re not a jerk for quitting, you wouldn’t have been a jerk if you quit in the first place without a replacement found (though in my experience finding a replacement is the norm).

It’s your right and you didn’t have to stay.

You were unprofessional in how you quit. If you have an issue with your employer you should bring it up with them and the issue could have been resolved there.

If it couldn’t then you could quit and your employer couldn’t complain as it is his fault. By saying nothing you just made a bad situation worse for everyone.

The employer should have done the same and approached you about changing the deal but just because the people around you act unprofessionally doesn’t mean it’s all right for you to do as well.

All in all, I’d say everyone sucks, maybe you suck a little less than the manager if that’s any consolation.” Reddit user

Another User Comments:

“Honestly? You were a bit of a jerk.

I mean, you had every right to quit and your boss should have kept his word, but you were very unprofessional in how you handled a crappy situation. You should have talked to your boss privately about the issue you were having, and if the problem couldn’t be resolved, tell him you were quitting and leave.

Going behind his back and badmouthing him to your coworkers, then badmouthing him to his face and in front of others was not the right thing to do. I know you were angry and you had a right to be, but sometimes you have to just take the high road.” Steph_WaHoo

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rbleah 1 year ago
Stay until we find a replacement? And just how looooong was it gonna take? Six weeks later they got nothin? OH HELL NO. AND THEN he starts to play games with your schedule? Again..OH HELL NO. I would have done the same. He just thought you would cave to him.
2 Reply

2. AITJ For Not Letting My Roommate Keep More Than One Dog?


“I bought a house about 2 years ago and I asked one of my friends if he wanted to move in with me. He said yeah and asked if he could have a dog and I said sure.

Throughout this time he has used his dog to breed with another similar dog and when he has the litter he sells them off and I don’t get any cut of it or anything which is fine, it’s his dog.

The first litter he held on to for 3 months before they all were sold, as you can imagine it smelled of dog and he kept them in the garage where they started to chew stuff up, such as the insulation in the walls.

He said he would fix what was chewed up and hasn’t to this day. He breeds the dog again and has another litter but this time he kept the puppies at the other friend’s house and after a while the other friend brought the puppies over to my house saying that it was just too much work and that the puppies would chew everything up and just too much for him, this is after he sold his share of the puppies since he owns the female.

So I said okay fine, my friend, Carlos the owner of the dog, said he wouldn’t keep them for long and that it was a priority for the puppies to be sold as soon as possible.

I knew he had a feeling about how I felt last time when he had the first litter of puppies here.

Fast forward to about 4 days ago we were in the kitchen conversing and I brought up how long before the puppies would be sold, keep in mind that they have been here almost a month, and now the puppies are about 3 months.

He responded by saying that he will keep one, the 2nd one will go to his partner that also happened to move in along with her son but will be getting an apartment in 2 weeks, and that the 3rd one he is going to clip his ears and hopefully will sell quicker.

I was taken aback, I processed it, and got very upset but didn’t say anything right then.

Today I was coming home from work and I saw him in the garage, after saying what’s up to him and how his day was, I told him that one dog is fine but I wouldn’t be okay with 2 dogs.

He replied, no it wouldn’t be a problem, that he would house train her just like the one he has already.

I said no, one is fine no more dogs.

They are not small either, they are at least 40-50 pound pit bulls.

He got mad and jittery, I could tell, and kept repeating that he wanted to raise the second dog too but he knows it’s my house and must respect my decision but hardly talked to me afterward.

And now I feel like a jerk. He is my friend, we have known each other for more than 10 years.

What do you guys think? Was I wrong? Should I have said it differently?”

Another User Comments:


To even suggest he would keep a 2nd is so entitled and presumptuous. Not to mention that he didn’t ask but just told you what he was going to do. And especially given the fact that he hasn’t fixed the first damage yet.

Did he even ask if he could do dog breeding? You may also want to suggest that breeding is not something you want to have done in your house unless you get a cut (because you are providing the space and extra utils and dealing with the smell, noise, and damage).

It is your house, and your rules.” unlikelyguacamole

Another User Comments:

“NTJ, your friend is taking advantage of your kindness and tolerance.

He didn’t ask you about keeping a puppy? He probably didn’t because he knew you would not want it. Instead, now making you the bad guy having to say no. Well, he is banking on being able to just keep this going long enough until you give in.

He hasn’t even fixed the insulation that he said he would years ago! Dude, it’s time to stand up to him. No to keeping the puppy, and no to the partner keeping the puppy unless it’s guaranteed out in 2 weeks.

Has she put a deposit down on this apt she supposedly has?” 1_Justbreakup

Another User Comments:

“NTJ. Your friend is contributing to multiple problems here. Not only are there already too many dogs, but many pitties end up unwanted & in shelters, so breeding them is irresponsible.

Cropping their ears is also unnecessary in most cases, so that’s another issue entirely. It’s your house anyway, so don’t feel bad about putting your foot down.” acrazycatmom

Another User Comments:

“YTJ if you don’t insist he spay his one dog or he has to move out.

He has NO business contributing to the overpopulation of a dog breed that packs the shelter. The fact that it took so long to sell the first litter TELLS you he is not producing desirable dogs. Stop this nonsense immediately.” LazySnowmanYo

0 points - Liked by ShayneSanchez and suna

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Michelles11 1 year ago
NTJ. But he is for breeding. As if there aren’t enough of the bully breeds in shelters already. Adopt, don’t shop.
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1. AITJ For Canceling My Daughter's Orthodontist Appointment?


“My daughter (13) has been wanting braces for a while, she gets bullied due to her teeth. I told her if things go well I might be able to get her braces this summer.

Unfortunately, I have been enduring a lot of hardships over the last 2 years. I am a guardian to 9 children due to my best friend passing away, she had 4 (ages 6-13) beautiful children and one of her last wishes was to make sure her children weren’t separated so my husband and I decided the best way to do that was to take them all.

We had to move into a bigger house in order to support the growing family. In order for us to afford such a huge house, we had to move to the countryside.

My husband has found out he has Osteosarcoma (bone cancer) which had put a lot of financial stress on us.

He’s in a lot of pain and needs expensive meds.

I made an appointment for my daughter but unfortunately, my car broke down which is looking like it will cost over $500 to fix. I need my car to get back and forth to work so I told my daughter we have to cancel.

She was really upset and told me that she’ll look ugly for another school year now and that I love my car and work more than her and that she hates me.

She has locked herself in her bedroom and has been refusing to eat until I bring her to the dentist.

Am I the jerk here?”

Another User Comments:

“This is difficult. I’m going to go with no jerks here. You need your car for work but I get her being insecure about her teeth. If possible try signing up for Medicaid.

With that many kids in your household, you should qualify unless you make a ridiculous amount of money. They should cover her braces as long as she has one of 3 different qualifiers. It would also help reduce the cost of medical care for your husband.” Pristine-Antelope-23

Another User Comments:


Honestly, if you already had 5 kids, why did you take in 4 more that you couldn’t afford? Why did you put your friend’s wishes ahead of your obligation to your daughter & the rest of your own children? You act like your daughter’s issue is just about how she looks.

If you took her to the dentist, basic medical care that she deserves, you would no doubt discover that the issue with her teeth is more about function and dental health. Anyone with teeth bad enough that others notice and bully her about definitely needs dental care.” YMMV-But

Another User Comments:

“No jerks here.

Your daughter doesn’t want braces, she needs braces. That’s like saying she wants glasses. It’s a piece of medically necessary equipment. But the sad fact of the matter is that they’re expensive and insurance covers barely any if any of the cost.

You can’t just pull money out of thin air, especially in an economy like that. But your daughter has every right to feel upset and stressed over this. I have a lot of dental problems because of my parents’ inability to get me proper oral care.

I don’t fault them for it but it really sucks to have had to suffer a lot of pain because things weren’t taken care of properly (ie, my canine teeth grew in wrong and it was extremely painful and still is embarrassing).

I would be doing everything I could as a mom to try and ensure my child had their needs met. Hopefully, you can find a way.” Graves_Digger

Another User Comments:

“OP, if you truly can’t afford the braces, you can’t afford them.

You can’t make money appear out of thin air. So NTJ for that.

But the way you speak about your daughter makes me wonder if you have any compassion for the way her world has been turned upside down and how this is affecting her.

She’s 13. She suddenly has four new siblings that you’re struggling to support. She had to leave her house, her school, and her town. She’s being bullied. Her dad is seriously ill. And with everyone around her needing ‘more’ than her (a sick father, siblings who are grieving) she probably feels like her needs are the last thing on your mind.

You promised her this one thing, that she was counting on to make things better. And then you didn’t keep your promise. She’s understandably devastated, and it’s not only about the braces.

So no, you’re not TJ because you can’t pay for braces, but that’s not the issue.” the_elves_sleep

Another User Comments:

“YTJ here.

First of all dental issues can worsen if delayed. It is possible the longer you take on having your daughter take dental care, the less impact braces will have in the future. Also, I think it’s unfair to your 4 bio children that 5 more children are suddenly introduced into their lives.

I understand that you want to do a good thing for those kids and want to provide them with a stable childhood out of foster care. As much as that is true, you have an obligation to all your children to be able to give them the medical support they require. If you’re unable to do so, then this current situation doesn’t help anyone.” These-Marketing-921

-2 points - Liked by shgo

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mima 10 months ago
Those kids should all be getting social security. Mine get 250 a month each. You should be getting medical insurance and food stamps. Also their dad should be paying child support. Take care of your family before someone else's.
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Sometimes it's obvious, other times it's not! You be the judge about who's the jerk! Upvote, downvote, and comment on your favorite stories by signing up for a Metaspoon account. Click Log In at the top right corner of this page to get started. (Note: Some stories have been shortened and modified for our audiences)