People Open Up About The Moment They Caught A Liar In A Lie
43. Found Her Phone Behind The Trunk Liner
“I was married for about 6 months and something just wasn’t right… Finally one day she and I were driving in her car to her parents for an event and once I got there I dropped her off and said I wasn’t feeling well, that I was going to go back home instead of staying. On my way home I stopped at a grocery store parking lot and tore her car apart…
Finally found a cell phone hidden behind the trunk liner.
Turned it on and read the text messages. All of the texts she sent to her boss saying she missed him and that she was on her way etc coincided with all of the times she said she was meeting her lady friends for lunch or something. It was a phone he bought for her. I called the number and he was surprised it was me, her husband on the other end.
I chewed him out and he played dumb. I explained he can keep her… I’m done. I called the wife from the same phone and told her I found her phone, don’t bother coming home.
It was like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. What I suspected for months was finally confirmed. I wasn’t crazy. I went to Walmart and bought new deadbolts for the house.
It turns out she had been sleeping with her boss for at least 6 months prior to our wedding as well. I’m like why even marry me then? I don’t get it.
Man, I wish I had access to GPS trackers back then like we do now. That would have made things so much easier… hehe. Would have been much better to confront them at his house or at a motel etc.
Oh well.
Once we separated… and I filed for divorce, Her maid of honor that was in our wedding reached out to me and the next thing I know we’re having drinks and began to go out shortly thereafter. The soon-to-be ex-wife HATED that. Bonus.
She also wanted to fight the divorce… I had a lawyer and she had a lawyer. She wanted to remain married. I did not.
We had an appt at the courthouse where I and my lawyer showed up and she and her lawyer were supposed to show up so she can sign the papers and it would be done. Her lawyer called and said she was not showing up to sign the paperwork. We wasted a day, I lost time at work, I had to pay my lawyer. Not cool.
Since we had just gotten married not long ago, I called her and gave her the next court appointment for her to attend in order to sign. I explained if she didn’t sign I’d print out all of the texts she and her boss sent back and forth (I had kept her burner phone) and send a copy to everyone that attended our wedding (I was the one that mailed out our wedding invites so I had all of the addresses etc) explaining who she was sleeping with and that this is the reason we are no longer married. The next appointment came around… She showed up and signed without a peep. Done. lol.”
42. My Bartender Friend Saves The Day
“Surprise flight from the UK to NYC for Valentine’s. We were in a long-distance relationship, and it being a Friday night when I landed, I knew she’d be at the bar near her office. So that’s exactly where I went to, looking forward to a romantic reunion and being overjoyed at the promise of copious amounts of sexy times over the next week.
As soon as I walk into the bar, one of the bartenders who is also a really good friend rushes over, and sort of propels me out of the front door.
Her face is in absolute shock. Our conversation, or at least what I can remember, goes a wee bit like this;
Her: Oh my God! I thought ‘E’ and you had broken up?
Me: Errr….what? No! What makes you think that?
Her: Umm…she’s been showing up with some guy on a regular basis and they’re sorta…close.
Me: What?!
Her: Not quite. They’re sucking face though.
Me: What?!.
Her: What do you want to do?
Me: What the hell.
What the hell. What the hell. What the hell.
I’ve just gotten off a six-hour flight, I’m jet-lagged and tired as hell. I’m not really in a fit state, but what I do know is that I have to re-book my flight home. Which I manage…my friend the bartender clears it with the owner to have me use the phone in the back office. I’m still stuck in NYC for a couple of days though, but I have no idea where I’m supposed to stay.
It all works out though – my friend offers to let me sleep on her couch (as long as I cook a meal for her). So she hands me her apartment keys, tells me to order food from one of the menus on her fridge, and before I go, we put my new snazzy gizmo to good use; a new-fangled digital camera (hey, this was 1999) with a 64MB SD card!
I have my friend take a picture of the happy couple and a picture of me outside the bar.
She tells me I can use her internet (‘just don’t be doing any weird nerd things – don’t mess up my PC’).
So I do.
I get to my friend’s place, order some food, and set about using her internet access. I email the two pictures taken at the bar to my soon-to-be-ex with the subject: ‘Guess where I am!?’ and by the time they’ve finished uploading, my food has arrived and I proceed to pig out while watching crappy American TV.
It’s late Monday evening and I am finally home. I am greeted by an absolutely annoying tone (yes, that’s a technical term) of missed calls. My answering machine is full of messages, too. My email inbox isn’t looking any better. I delete everything without listening to or reading, send my friend an email to let her know I made it back ok, thank her for being there for me, and slowly start to absorb everything that’s happened over the last four days.”
41. She Didn't Feel Any Guilt For Three Months
“Been together for 2 years until one day, out of the blue she says she’s not happy anymore and breaks up with me. It sucked but I figured it was for the best if she wasn’t happy.
About a week after we had broken up I saw her at the bar with some guy with who she sheepishly admitted she was going out with. Later that night I end up standing next to him ordering drinks.
He apologized to me for the awkwardness.
‘Yeah, it’s just weird since we’ve only been broken up for a few days and she’s already seeing someone.’
He pauses ‘…..a few days? She and I have been seeing each other for like three months now.’
We stared at each other for a second. And then my ex comes running up to pull him away from me. He shrugged her off and told her to go talk to herself and then left the bar.
That’s how I found out my ex had been cheating on me for 3 months before apparently guilt took hold and she broke up with me.
I bumped into the other guy a few months later at a bar and we actually talked about it. It was weird hearing about it from his perspective. In his mind, he had thought she was just really flaky but after speaking to me it just all clicked for him. And we went through some of the times when he couldn’t reach her because she was with me and vice versa. Not sure how I didn’t pick up on it. Either way, I’m happily married now and I think she had to move home and live with her mom.”
40. His Uber Receipts Say It All
“His uber receipts didn’t match with the activities he said he was doing. He said he went to see the movie but his receipt said that he went check-in at a hotel.
I told him I know he cheated on me but he doesn’t know how until today how I know.
He asked for my forgiveness and we stayed for 6 months but it didn’t work out because he acted like he is entitled to my trust since he already asks for forgiveness and didn’t understand recovery takes time.
He also tried to turn the table on me regarding the trust issues.
I couldn’t take it anymore – so I ended things with him abruptly and block him everywhere. After a month, I saw him yesterday with another girl and I turn around walked off. I do not want to engage with him in any situation.
Some days have been a struggle, some days have been quite a breeze.
Most importantly I don’t have to listen to his problems and support him anymore.
What I know is he still hasn’t got a job until today. I hope karma will serve him well soon and he gets to understand and feel the same pain he has inflicted on me.
I never ever cheated in my life and won’t do to someone coz I know how awful it feels. I feel really ‘unclean’ with myself sometimes especially after the fact he slept with me the next day after his one-night stand.”
39. She Spit The Truth When I Went To The Concert Without Her
“I was uploading pictures from our night out on her computer and found pictures of her best friend sleeping with her significant other and they were pretty detailed pictures but none showing my significant other getting involved, just being the camerawoman. The latest this could have happened was a couple of weeks into our relationship and that would have been over a year prior to me finding these.
So being someone who doesn’t get jealous and wanting to give her the benefit of the doubt, I let it go and didn’t say a word.
Then fast forward 6 months (we’ve been together for 2 years at this point) I got us tickets to go to a concert for my birthday and she didn’t want to go, I couldn’t find anyone to buy them so I asked if I could go with my best friend, who is a guy and she’s known him for years.
She agrees and as I and my best friend are driving to this venue which is an hour away she starts fighting with me over text. She’s completely upset that I went without her even though she told me every day for the last week that she didn’t want to go. After I pointed this out and said ‘Look, I am not going to throw away these tickets, I asked if it bothered you that I went with my best friend and you said you didn’t care, you can’t be mad at me’ and her reply was ‘WHATEVER! WHEN I WAS STILL UP AT COLLEGE I HAD A THREESOME WITH (woman and man)’ or I told her I knew, that I saw the pictures. Hung up, enjoyed the show. Left her the next day.
Told her straight up, it’s one thing to cheat and be honest and fess up, it’s another to try and use it as ammo in a fight.”
38. She Confessed The Truth While I Was Under The Influence
“I used to take Vyvanse, basically a form of Adderall while in college trying to balance full-time course work and a full-time job. I had just refilled my script and had it packed in an overnight bag for an out-of-town move I was doing the next day. My two dogs got into the bag and ate my jerky and chewed open my script bottle and started chewing on the capsules.
This happens while I was on the way home from the grocery store and my ex was on the way home from a slow night at work. She beat me home and when I walked in the door she told me she found the bottle and we proceeded to freak out. We find an emergency vet but realize that even together we don’t have enough to pay for treatment for one.
We were sitting on the couch, the drugs start to kick in and the dogs start to spin. Literally. The older one, Beatrix, starts to go in small circles and doesn’t stop. The younger one, Aesop, starts to doing larger oval-like circles stopping to bark at ghosts every 5-7 seconds. This doesn’t stop. I’m in shock, worried that my dogs would die, worried that in about 5 hours I was supposed to wake up and drive a truck halfway across the country (Georgia -> Ohio) and she decided that then was the perfect moment to tell me that she had been cheating on me with a best friend/co-worker at the time that I worked one on one with daily.”
37. Mom Tried To Win My Sympathy
“My mom was supposed to go prom dress shopping with me, we didn’t see each other a whole lot because she worked at a bar in the evenings and I had school all day. So quality time was coveted, I was incredibly excited to hang out with her and have a girls’ day out. Something seemed off though, I could tell she was trying to figure out how to bring up a certain conversation with me.
She started by telling me how unhappy she was in her marriage and how she’s been ‘trying to fix things for years’ (They never considered marriage counseling, they honestly didn’t seem unhappy.) she was trying to get me to sympathize with her, which I couldn’t. My stepdad is the most lenient laid back guy who has honestly had to deal with my mom’s problems for my entire life.
Then she started telling me about how she ran into her old high school sweetheart, we’ll call him Steve. She said she hung out with Steve a couple of times in the past month and she was trying to almost ask for my blessing. I was barely even 17 and couldn’t even comprehend what it would mean to my family if she was cheating, so I just said something like ‘wow small world, good thing you’re happily married and we’re all happy.’ In a very nudge-nudge way, I asked my stepdad if he was happy in his marriage and if he knew someone named Steve.
After I got home from school and work that night my little brother was frozen in shock on the couch, my stepdad was gone and my mom was sobbing and groveling at us kids. It’s been five years, my mom has to get a restraining order for Steve and two other Steve types. My stepdad was a mess for a while, but since has found a great woman with two kids and is tackling all of his greatest dreams. (And my little brother just started college, YAY BRO!)”
36. I Told Him To Watch Out For The Nurses
“We had been married for a little over a year and he had just started working at the hospital. I joked about watching out for those nurses. He started to go to the bar after work, no big deal. I understand needing to unwind after working a job like that. But it was becoming every night. I woke up for work around 5 and I remember waking up when he came home at 4:30 in the morning.
Up to that point I had had a suspicion but try to dismiss it but after that, I knew. It made me sick. I had to come home from work early that day and was terrified I would find him with someone.
About 2 weeks after my grandma passed away he came home from work (3rd shift) and pretty much went straight to bed. It was like 7:30 in the morning and I could hear his phone going crazy.
I went in and tried to silence it when I saw the text message from Lisa. I tried to read it but his phone was locked, the first time I had ever known him to have a lock. I woke him up and asked him to unlock it, he did and I went to the other room. The text messages were things like you’re so beautiful, I wish you were here, work is just so much better when you’re here. I was devastated but angry. I kicked the door open, threw the phone at him, and said what the hell is this? He cried. Not like a few tears, he ugly/snot cried. I just kind of shut down. I think it was about 5 months later I left and filed for a divorce. He was remarried within a year and a half or so.”
35. I Got Suspicious When She Shaved
“She had two girls prior to our relationship, a 3-year-old and 1-year-old when we got together. After being together for a year we had our son. She stopped working to do the stay-at-home-mom thing which was fine. I was able to take care of us until the kids would go to school then she could work again if she wanted. 4 years later the girls are in school and she wants to work again.
We find a daycare for our son and she goes back to work.
About 3 months after she started working she tells me she and a friend I knew were going shopping for school clothes for the kids but my spidey senses went code red. I’d never been suspicious of her at all before. I didn’t even know her phone password but I watched her unlock it over her shoulder later that night and got it.
The next morning before I leave for work (I’m usually the first one awake in the house.) I check her phone and see she’d spent the day with her boss at his house. I confront her about it and she claims nothing happened and they just hung out. We fight about it all day and I even came home from work because I couldn’t keep it together.
Still not knowing how I wanted to proceed I sleep on it till the next day.
I ended up getting her phone again later that day after she’d told him I found out etc and based on their conversation I don’t think it got physical but there was definitely SOMETHING and they want to was there at least on her part (he was also in a relationship of his own).
Doing more detective work I noticed she’d shaved EVERYTHING prior to going meet him ..which she NEVER did..and I couldn’t deal.
Even if nothing happened that day I knew where her mind was and I’ve never been so distraught in my life. Everything I thought I could count on in life was gone. My biggest motivation to get up every day and strive for what we wanted in life was gone.
We had plans to move to another state in the near future..just my entire foundation was shattered. She was my best friend and the person I thought I could rely on upon through everything and that’s what I gave to her..but that’s what I got in return. I couldn’t sleep, couldn’t go 30 mins without a crying episode even at work, food I loved didn’t taste good, I could barely eat and lost about 30 lbs, people telling me I looked sick.
I think for a brief while I literally lost the will to live. My kids were the only thing that got me through that time. Even to this day it still hurts though. I couldn’t even type this without tearing up.
I told her the day she left my house ‘He doesn’t really want you, or the kids, you forget he also had a relationship? You’re both side pieces and you think this will last? You’re giving up everything for nothing..and when he leaves you and you realize you messed up it’ll be too late and I’ll have moved on.’ …and that’s exactly what happened.
Fast forward 3 months and they’re supposed to be moving in together, he goes total ghost mode on her and never speaks to her again. Not two weeks after that she’s telling me she messed up and wants her family back. That was 3 weeks ago..still don’t know what to do going forward.”
34. Projection Is Her Defense Mechanism
“After a year and a half of marriage to a lovely caring partner, she suddenly stopped being loving. Went to South Africa to ‘see her mom’. Little contact, ended up staying for 6 weeks instead of 2. Came back furious at me for panicking because she never wanted to talk to me and wouldn’t tell me what was going on, she announced she was going to spend six months in South Africa because we were having troubles and her mom wasn’t well.
Insisted that I must support her financially the whole time… We argued about this but she would not budge – I decided to wait and see before I gave her anything.
She left. I hacked into her blackberry. Found hundreds of text emails and photos showing she had been planning this with a guy, an ex over there, for months. Also found texts and messages to and from another one of her exes arranging hookups going back over a year, including while all this went on.
There was more, but I couldn’t take going through more. Gave it all to a divorce lawyer. And then the mask really dropped, her real personality came out… She came back, blamed me for EVERYTHING because I was ‘jealous’ – total projection, of course, insisting I go for counseling, saying I had crossed the line… She tried to totally break me, make me submit, and let her do everything openly that she did in secret before.
I threw her out but had to call the police on her when she broke into my house.
I wasn’t the best husband, but I was a good one, and I really tried to make our marriage perfect, I did so much soul searching to try to see what I had done to deserve this… But I told her to go to hell and one very expensive divorce later I was finally free.”
33. Turns Out His Joke Isn't Really A Joke
“His best friend’s wife told me accidentally because my ex-husband failed to get his story straight with his buddy/scapegoat, then after the divorce was final he admitted it in a ploy to get me back.
XH told me he had been working late, then met his buddy for drinks. I talked to buddy’s wife (we were friends, I was oblivious, I didn’t go out hunting for info) that weekend at a dinner party and she mentioned a big decision they’d spent the evening discussing the same night XH was supposedly out drinking with him.
It’s really that dumb because he could have just said he worked even later and had a beer at work or when he got home before me, and I’d have been none the wiser.
After the divorce, I found out he’d been with ‘Maria’ for months and had managed to keep it from all his friends. His friends only found out about her when he dumped her to try to “call off the divorce” but I was long gone by then, moved 4 states away and started a new life, and he cried to his friends when his stunt didn’t work out and now he’d lost us both.
If I’d been smarter, I’d have known WAAAAY sooner, because he had messed up and spilled the beans himself early on after he started seeing her, and blew it off as a joke ‘about his other life’. That’s how ‘oh, I was out with Maria har har har’ became a joke in our (soon to be short-lived) marriage. The joke seemed plausible (as just a joke) and funny at the time, because we lived together, worked together, had the same friends, and spent most of our time together (or so it seemed) so when could he have actually found the time to cheat – but he did.
The worst part of it all (at least that part) is that I am poly and would have been fine with ‘Maria’ if he’d been honest with me about her. I was having medical issues so his physical needs weren’t being met, and instead of talking to me about it like an adult and working it out, he cheated and lied and then divorced me when his own guilt overwhelmed him. We had other issues in our marriage, and I’m glad it ended the way it did and when it did – turned out to be the best thing he ever did for me, but it was all just so dumb and immature.”
32. They Didn't Just Drink
“One of our friends, or I guess one of my friends now, is into some drugs. She had obtained some nice green plant and we all got pretty stoned. Neither I nor my ex had smoked a lot, so we were out of it. When we were alone she mentioned that she still loved me, but was curious about other people.
We decided we should talk about it the next day when we were sober.
She gave me a big speech about how we had been together for so long and felt like she was missing out on her youth and all that cliche. Eventually, she admitted that she had even been out for drinks with a guy who works in her office without telling me. That started an eight-hour flight. Eventually, things were calming down. At that point, we hadn’t eaten in nearly 24 hours and we were too tired and hungry to keep fighting.
We got a pizza, sat on the floor, and silently ate it. Eventually, she came out again with how she still loves me, and she didn’t want to lose me. She suggested couples therapy to help us through. I told her I was broken up, but if it had just been drinks and nothing more, maybe I could move past it. She broke down crying, said it wasn’t just drinks.
I bought a bottle of absinthe and went to a friend’s house to drain it.
Oh man, that was terrible.”
31. I Had Drinks With My Buddy And Got My Modem Back
“At 21 I lived with my significant other when I first attended college. We lived with one of my best friends at the time, who was also a woman.
Our college and work schedules didn’t match up very well so there was alot of time where I had free time and she was at work/school and vice versa.
She starts showing the typical signs. Irritable with me for no reason, decreased libido, never had money anymore, etc.
So one day I’m at home alone cuz class got canceled. It’s been an especially stressful week. 2 weeks before finals if I remember it correctly. Our apartment was just totally trashed and it bothered her but no one had the time to do much about it. So I thought I’ll surprise her and clean the place real good so we can all just relax after finals.
Start doing laundry and notice a decent amount of my significant other’s panties have these white stains on them. I instantly think the worst.
A best friend comes home early too after I had already cleaned and freaked myself out of the panties. I’m visibly pretty torn up so she askes me what’s wrong. I tell her I think my significant other is cheating on me cuz look at all these white stains! She ruthlessly made fun of me because at that age I didn’t realize female discharge was a regular thing.
I thought that only happened when things were like…. wrong.
I take her teasing without rebuttal because I was so relieved that I was wrong about the stains.
I use this life lesson to ignore the rest of the signs having convinced myself that I had convinced myself of her infidelity and that everything else was likely just in my head too.
Cue a month and some change later I pretty much catch her cheating with a dude I despise when we went out to the bars.
Together. On the way home I freak out cuz that thing sucks. She proceeds to dump me cuz she’s been cheating on me for like the whole time we were in school.
Kicked me out of the apartment we both lived in. Tried to sucker me into helping her with rent still because my name still on the lease.
To top it all off, she and my parents had an agreement.
They had just retired and bought a new car, gave me their old one. So I had 2 cars technically. Their old car was much nicer than my current one so I took it. They were gonna sell it if not. So now instead they were gonna sell my old car. She expressed interest in it. The car was still worth 14kish. Which would be a very expensive gift to just give someone.
My folks were well off but FAR from rich. My amazing mother could see how much I absolutely adored this girl so she said my significant other could drive the car the rest of the school year and if we were still going strong by then she could just have it.
We still had winter break and a whole semester left to go. It was 5 weeks after they had made that agreement that she dumped me.
After I got all my things moved out my dad tasked me with retrieving my old car. So I went and took it. For all intents and purposes of the law, it was still very much mine. So she called the cops on me, said I broke into the apartment for the keys, threatened her, and stole her (my) car. I had extra keys and literally did none of that.
Didn’t even go inside. Just got dropped off, hopped in my old car, and took off.
Actually, wait sorry here’s the real kicker. 2 months after that I ask for the internet modem back cuz she canceled the internet and I bought it in the first place. She gave me the run-around for a month. One night we went to a bar for a mutual friend’s birthday, didn’t know each other was going to be there.
I walk in, see her, and decide I’m just gonna ignore her all night for my friend’s sake. Which goes fine for a few hours….. right up until she gets white girl wasted and decided to go out to her car, get my modem, come back into the bar, and with a running start chucked it at my head. Which hits me square in the eye/nose.
Bloody nose. The whole bar comes to a screeching halt. Like party scenes in movies where the record skips and everyone is just staring at me. The bartender asks if I want her to call the cops. I told her Nah it’s cool I got what I came here for, drinks with my buddy, and I got my modem back! And then just kinda laughed it off ya know? The look on her face was PRICELESS.
I should’ve called the cops instead. Her actions were out of control. She acted out to get me to react. You lose when you react.
Women hate being ignored more than just about anything else. If you don’t believe me go make your significant other angry then ignore her texts/calls for a few hours. Shell be way more ticked about being ignored than whatever you did in the first place.
Besides, I call the cops. And then what? Women get babied in the justice system and I really doubt anything would’ve come about it. Even if it did punishment comes and goes and then you forget about it. BUT NOW every time she thinks of me I guarantee this night pops into her head and she’s reminded that she doesn’t mean a god damn thing to me all over again.”
30. Greeted Him A Memorable Merry Christmas
“I had a very uneasy feeling the whole night, so I went through his phone (invasion of privacy, I know). The worst I was expecting to find was maybe some inappropriate flirting, but oh no. I stumbled upon a convo with his ex, from the day before. They had met up that day, and he sent her a nice follow-up text saying ‘I can still feel being inside of you’ and some other gut-wrenching words, as I knew at the time of their meetup/convo, I was home waiting for him to pick me up with MY car that he was borrowing.
Later that same evening of his infidelity, we went to the bar where his ex worked (as we were all in the same group of friends, this was our regular bar, and they had been broken up for over a year). She laughed and smiled to my face, served me drinks, watched us kiss and dance, all while having slept with him 4 hours prior.
It wasn’t until the following evening, at a Christmas Eve party, that I found the messages, and also found out that that night was the 2nd of what would have presumably been many ‘meet-ups’.
He was passed out drunk when I went through the phone, so I had some time to think about what I was going to do. Rather than wake up him, I decided to take a screenshot of the conversation, text it to myself from his phone, and in the morning, Christmas morning, he could wake up to an empty bed and to my reply: ‘Merry effing Christmas.'”
29. Didn't Pay Her Phone Bill And Move Out Within Six Hours
“I was at work until 10 pm and my ex was home. This was literally the day before our two-year anniversary. I had the whole next day off and some plans for us to have fun. Around 930 she called me telling me she had to go to the store to pick some stuff up. I also needed a few things and told her I’d meet her there.
She said ok. I show up at around 1015 and she’s nowhere to be seen.
I call her, no answer. Text her, no answer. I drive to the bar just up the street to see if she may be stopped for a drink. Nothing. I then decide to go home (we lived together). She’s not there either. Finally around 11 I get in touch with her and ask her where she is.
There’s a lot of noise in the background, and she’s clearly drunk, but she is saying she is out and won’t give me more details. That was the last time I spoke to her that night. I waited up until like four am before falling asleep. Fast forward to 8 am and I’m awake. Make some coffee, try her phone, it’s going right to voicemail. I had some things to do that morning at a specific time so I left around 930 to make my appointments.
At exactly 1000, she’s texting me saying she is home. I cancel my prior engagement and go home to confront her/find out what the hell was going on. She claims she was out, got drunk, and stayed at a friend’s house.
I didn’t buy that excuse but decided to leave it for now. She had a history of making stupid decisions and was a borderline alcoholic so it was a feasible scenario.
The next night she got to pass out drunk and I did something I had never done and haven’t done since: took her phone. I went through her texts and found the guy she was talking to. She had texted him for a couple of weeks and earlier that day had asked how he liked the blowjob. I don’t remember signing off on her blowing anyone that wasn’t me.
So it’s now the day after our two-year anniversary and it’s 10 pm and I did the only thing I could think of: I called my father. I met him at a local restaurant and he was sympathetic. He began to discuss what I wanted to do about it with me. I decided to try and work it out. He respected my decision, but let me know he was there for me.
Skip to the next morning and I confront her. She’s ashamed of herself and very apologetic. Crying, the whole nine. I tell her she can never talk to this man again. She agrees, and things are ok for the next couple of weeks. She’s more attentive and appreciative of me. Then one day I’m home and she’s at work and she frantically texts me asking if I can pay her phone bill because it’s going to be shut off if she doesn’t pay it today.
I said sure and she gives me her login information. The first thing I notice is that her usage is insanely high, second thing I notice on the bill is the number for the guy she claimed to have stopped talking to. Not only did I not pay her bill, but I didn’t even give her notice. All the bills and the lease for our place were in her name.
I literally called my dad and we FRANTICALLY moved me out with his small crossover and my sedan over the course of six hours. Made it just in time for her to get home, see that I moved out, and then realize she couldn’t text me or call me because her phone got cut off at the end of the business. Best decision I ever made. Haven’t spoken to her outside a courtroom in over 3 years and I’m in the best, healthy relationship I’ve ever been in now.”
28. Partner Cheated On Me With A Guy Who's A Complete Opposite Of Me
“Many years ago I had a 3-year relationship officially end and it took her moving out of the city to get my life back on track again.
The first two years were great, but I wish I could erase the third year of our involvement. By that time, I sacrificed my college career to take care of her and work full time.
During that final year, she moved out of our place to live on her own in a more hipster part of our city to be more artsy and independent – but demanded that we still see each other and have a type of relationship where we only see each other.
Unbeknownst to me, she didn’t follow the rules she set.
I found out later it was multiple guys she had messed around with, but the worst one was going to her place on a night where we had plans. She wasn’t answering her phone, all lights were off, but her car was there. She lived in a place that was a home converted to apartments, and her window was on ground level.
So, I knocked on her window, and eventually, the lights went on. You could see into the living room when she left the blinds open, and of course, I see her strolling out of the bedroom with this scrawny looking, tatted and pierced up, pale wannabe gangster boy in tow. This guy was the opposite of everything I was, and someone she swore she wasn’t ‘romantic’ with.
While this guy frantically searched for his shirt, I put my fist through that window, busted the glass, and cut my hand pretty deep.
The dude slips through the back door and I run around the back to catch him while I’m in a blind fit of rage. He had bolted out of sight. I’m actually glad he slipped away into the dark of night because I had lost all control at that point and felt no pain despite the blood leaking from my hand.
I even jumped into my car to see if I could catch him out, but no dice. The messed up part? I tried to fix things with the girl anyway, but she decided to move far away shortly after in order to ‘clear her conscience’. Her friends had tried to give me subtle warnings, and she even wound up making out with one of her friends’ significant other.
It has been many years, and the girl still reaches out to me now and then to tell me how wrong she was, that she has dreams about me and hopes we can ‘talk’ because no one has ever loved her as I did. Shut up, Catie. My life got back on track the day you left.”
27. Paid Her A Surprise Visit And It Was A Success
“By this time, she had already moved out into her own place. Things weren’t looking bright at all but we agreed to talk Sunday morning. I couldn’t sleep the night before. I felt like a mix between a kid on Christmas eve and a kid who knew he had to visit the dentist in the morning.
Trying as hard as I could to put her first, even though this talk hung in the air like a noxious layer of fog, I stopped at Starbucks.
I don’t know why, but I am forever thankful that I did.
I pulled into her apartment complex while the rest of the world was just waking up. I parked within the eyesight of her front door and noticed a car leaving. An older Mazda 3 hatchback with the most bro-looking dude I’ve ever seen. A bit odd to be going somewhere this early but whatever.
When I got into her apartment she was almost angry that I was there that early.
Maybe it was because she didn’t have time to clean up her bed, which was for sure slept in by two people. Or maybe it was the kitchen mess that she didn’t have time to clean up, two shot glasses a bottle of tequila, half a lime, a knife. She spent some time in the bathroom as I stood in her living room/dining room taking note that her work laptop that she was supposedly staying up late with work on, was nowhere to be found.
I stopped her in the hallway when she went to go take a shower. Asked her how he was last night, and the night before… I’ll never forget the look of horror on her face.
And I was at peace with it at that moment. I didn’t realize that part until the day she was served.”
26. All Of My Exes Had Infidelity Issues
“A friend of mine got to our group and talked about how he was making out with a girl the night before. He described her and he was matching then significant other’s appearance. I asked about some absurd little detail and he confirmed it. At that point in time, I had not introduced her to my friends as we had only been together a few weeks.
My friend asked if I wanted to punch him. First, I called up the girl with my buddy’s phone (this was pre-everyone having cellular phones), broke up with the girl, then I slugged him on the arm and said, ‘thank you.’
Next up. Girl and I were about at that line and we were getting hot and heavy. She said she wasn’t ready (still a virgin, cool) so I backed off.
She told me she loved me (in French), hung out for a while. A little while goes on, she says she’s tired and is going home, we part ways for the evening, I go to a buddy’s house and she’s there completely enveloped in conversation with another guy. A fellow whom she had been getting closer and closer to. When she saw me walk in the door it was deer in the headlights, hesitant excuses, etc.
I said ‘it’s cool’, because I was going to play it out. A week later we were split, a month later she had lost her virginity to that guy. But wait! There’s more. A few years later, we started talking again and eventually rekindled things. In case you’re curious, she was ready at this point in time and it was pretty great. I opened up a whole new world to that girl.
BUUUUUT, I knew something was up when I was hanging out at her place, another couple of guys were there, one of whom she had spoken of quite often, and she told me it was time for me to go because she didn’t wanna keep me up late since I work early in the morning. A glance at another guy, he’s got the ‘go. go. go.’ look in his eyes, I smile and say ok, next day, split up.
But wait! There’s more! And yes, I’m an idiot. Though not effectively cheating as we were not in a relationship, but this is a trend that has continued to follow me to this day. Fast forward a few more years, talking, touching, banging, we’re at a party, I’m defusing a situation between another couple, the drummer from my band and girl start talking, by the end of the night she doesn’t want anything to do with me.
At this point, it’s just ‘whatever.’ They eventually got married, have a child, super in love. It’s kinda awesome. And I am still friends with both of them. My personal issues of the time never hindered anything as bandmates.
Next. This girl’s just an idiot. Within a day, without provocation or communication about one event to the other persons, I found out the girl had slept with a friend several months ago when he just blurted it out, found out from another guy she spent the night with him when I was sick one night and couldn’t hang out (we had a long-distance thing, she was in town, I could not find the strength), she slept with another guy in an apartment full of my (not her) friends one night after we had an argument, and while we were on the Skype, after about 20 minutes I heard a male sneeze from off-camera and her eyes got wide as hell.
‘Well. It sure has been an interesting day…’ And then we broke up. She came to town that weekend to try and work things out, I would not budge, she slept with a guy she met that night and caught herpes.
And finally, in the tales of absolute intelligence. Long-term relationship, rough patch times, significant other gets home late, drunk, horny as hell. So, we’re going at it, she calls me by a name that is NOTHING like mine and which belongs to a co-worker whom she had mentioned more times than make me comfortable.
I stop, ‘that’s not my name…why did you call me (blank)?’ Um. Err. Something about how it was my fault somehow… whatever. Go to sleep. I wake up for work. She’s in a coma (figuratively), go to the kitchen to eat, I see her phone on the counter. Unlocked, unsecured. I check it out, text messages from (blank) and she is trying to convince him to meet at a gas station that had shut down while she was making her way back to our place after she tried going to his place.
He was making excuses about ‘I don’t want my grandparents to hear anything, maybe later.’ She was desperate. I exploded. We argued for about 6 or 7 hours, physically and via text. I asked her what in her mind made her think that it was any sort of ok to talk to another person like that while she’s supposedly ‘committed’ to someone. The reason, ‘That’s just the way he likes to be talked to.’ Just keep lighting bombs, girl.
Because of… situations, I (idiot) decided I would let it go this time if she would not interact with this guy as she has been.
A few weeks later, I go to our deli and bar of choice. I was there for the deli side of things as I had our kid with us. She shows up around 8 in street clothes, when she should have been at work, and with…
her dad. Alright, whatever. She doesn’t see him as much and wait are you kidding me. (Blank) shows up… the first thing he says to her, ‘Hey, got your text a little late.’ There are those familiar wide eyes… I don’t shift emotions at all. The dude ‘shakes’ my hand (weak as hell), meets her dad, etc. I ‘hang out’ for about 30 more minutes as it’s time to get the kiddo home and to bed.
Part ways. (Blank): ‘Hey, man, nice to finally meet you’ friendly-like. Me: ‘Ok.’ Ex gets home 7 hours later. ‘Sorry, I had to take (blank) home, he was way too drunk.’ I say, ‘tell him to call a cab next time, I don’t want you getting arrested driving through cop central hammered. Or driving hammered at all for that.’ I was originally going to dismiss until I go to my car for work and see she is parked at the very corner edge of the yard.
The first and only time. Sigh. I go and look in her car. In the passenger seat, I see a cell phone, keys, sunglasses, and her wallet strewn about the passenger side floor well, the chair is slid all the way back, and I lose my sanity again. I told her what I found and that we need to talk when I get back. I call her out for lying, I ask WHAT IS GOING ON HERE, just all kinds of things.
She is drunk (at 5 pm) so of course I can’t get a straight answer. She then brings up, ‘why does this happen? We have a great night then you blow up on me like this and I can’t take it.’ ‘Why do I blow up?! Because it looks a whole hell lot like you are banging this guy! And it just so happens I’m only finding out whenever you’re actually turned on enough to sleep with me!’ (We had been having intimacy issues. New parents and lack of compromise. I had to give up everything so she could do anything.) We split up, she still will not admit to anything today. What got me, is that she started a rumor that I was the one cheating on her. Which I thought was just adorable.”
25. My Relationships Made Me Not Tolerate Cheating Anymore
“Two nights before I left for college my friends and significant other had a party and were having a good time. She got pretty drunk and was all over my best friend. He was pushing her off of him, and then she yelled at him ‘you were fine banging me yesterday.’
Another time I was at my friend’s wedding, and I was in the buffet line talking to the best man (also my friend).
I don’t know how we got on the subject by I said my significant other’s breasts were a good size for her. He agreed and said something like ‘yeah, they are perky.’ I kind of blackout after he said that and within hours I was at her house to get my stuff. Apparently, they hooked up the week before. She and I were going through a rough patch because a few months earlier group of her friends told me she was cheating on me and the way she acted suggested so (distance).
Needless to say, he didn’t know we were together and believed her when she was saying we weren’t, too bad I didn’t know.
Another girl, who was really fun but was always late for things. Which is normal for women, but she was always an hour or two late. Also, I was never allowed at her place she could only go to mine. She lived with her significant other and he would sleep with her before she left to go see me.
I found this out when she got pregnant 3 months into our relationship, and I never saw her with her clothes off.
My last significant other, very smart girl (profession: home health doctor) and attractive. We went out one night, and a guy who also thought he was in a monogamous relationship with her, came up and introduced himself as her partner. Apparently, she told him she was out with friends, that’s why he was confused to see her with only a guy at the bars and came to investigate.
9 out of 14 relationships I have been in have ended due to cheating. I hate cheaters. Any sign of cheating, I now just stop talking to them.”
24. Wife Cheated And Blamed Everything On Me
“My now ex-wife told me she would be working late at the office to catch up on bills (she was a secretary to a chiro office). I got a text around 11 pm saying she was still there but would be coming home soon. I went to bed but kept my phone nearby.
I wake up at 2 am and still, her side of the bed was empty, the car was still gone.
I texted her but after 10 minutes, no reply. So I called. No reply.
At this point, I had a few things running in my mind and surprisingly not anything unscrupulous. I thought she either passed out at work, someone could have seen her alone in the office and broke in, or she could have wrecked on the way home.
So after two more calls, I hop in my car and drive.
I get to the offices and the place is bare save for a few cars left at the bar next door. Most importantly her car isn’t there. I do loops around the building, looking, but nothing.
I call again and get voice mail. Sitting in the parking lot, confused and a bit angry, she calls.
‘Hey honey, I’m still at the office. I fell asleep working but I’ll be heading out soon.’
‘Oh.
Really? Because I’m right outside the office…and there is no one here.’
And I’ll never forget her reaction.
‘…well THAT’S GREEEEAAAT! Why are you at my work?’
‘The better question is where are you?’
She told me it didn’t matter anymore because she assumed I was going to end the marriage because of this stunt. And she assumed right.
She came home eventually, yelled at me, yelled at me for moving my sleeping stuff into the spare bedroom, called me a bad husband for not paying attention to her which forced her to sleep with other men, and then accused me of sleeping with other women.
I will say I am now 6 months happily divorced and in a better place. It turns out that wasn’t the first time she cheated on me (from what I learned from ex-friends and family members of hers) but it was indeed the last time against me.”
23. She Came Clean After 3 Months
“It was a snowball. I had hints when she started acting differently but it all sort of just piled up, it wasn’t one event in particular. She had always been really clingy mostly because she didn’t have a job or friends. When she got a job she started going out with coworkers, that wasn’t a red flag yet but it set the stage. Then she came home two hours late from work one day without telling me in advance she was going to be late.
My first feeling was a concern but then I felt something in the pit of my stomach and I checked our shared bank account and noticed she had just bought two movie tickets. Told me she met someone online and she felt she needed to make friends and was embarrassed to tell me. Then she lost weight, started wearing a lot of makeup and perfume, and one day she called me by my name instead of ‘babe’.
It was another 3 months before she came clean about what she was doing. I gained about 80 lbs and started drinking heavily in those 3 months because I knew already. Dark times those days were. I think the worst part is that after we had split I found her old phone which still had her email account opened. So I wasn’t spared any of the details of the affair.”
22. Abusive Fiancé Forgot To Log Out His Gmail From The Browser
“I caught my ex-fiancé cheating on me 3 weeks before our wedding a few months ago. He was super abusive, to begin with, but one night he just didn’t come home until really late. He came back started fighting with me, full-on screaming and smashing things before packing a bag and leaving our house. I literally hadn’t said more than 10 words throughout the entire thing.
Poor pathetic me decided to check his email to see if he had made a hotel reservation because I was worried about him. I discovered he had deleted all of his online apps from his iPad (Facebook, Gmail, Facebook messenger, etc) which I thought was really strange but still, I didn’t suspect. Luckily he was logged in on his Gmail through the browser and I found an uber receipt.
I thought it was a hotel but after googling it discovered it was a rural housing area. I realized pretty quickly after that.
It sucked but I packed all of my stuff, canceled the wedding, and took my puppy all within about 12 hours of finding out. He was shocked, and yes I definitely had some very weak moments but I’m so much stronger now. I had a miscarriage a few weeks before he cheated and had a bit of a mental breakdown, his reasoning behind the cheating was that I had been too clingy after losing my baby.
I say my baby because he never really gave a care about any of it. I’m doing much better now, traveling the world and having lots of amazing hot moments with the sweetest guy, whereas he is an overweight alcoholic who has no friends. It Will take a long time for my heart to heal though I think, it feels like the past few years were all a lie.”
21. Her Ghost Still Haunts Me Eight Years Later
“About 20 years ago I went to a party with my then-significant other, Jess. Was hanging out, didn’t see her around, and went looking for her. Found her in the pool wrapped around a guy trying to talk him into sleeping with her. It was dark out, and I was able to stand there for a few minutes of her trying to seduce him, and him trying to refuse verbally, but he did nothing to get her off of him.
They eventually noticed me and she blamed it all on him. He booked it into the house and locked himself in a room. I was drunk and stupidly took her word for it. We stayed together for a few more months, but I eventually broke up with her.
Fast forward about 8 years and I barely think of her. One night though I was playing poker with some friends.
They had invited a guy that we all knew but wasn’t in my main group of friends.
We got to talking about parties we had gone to in the past, Friends we had, etc. I mention that party and this guy says, ‘I was at that party! I banged some girl named Jess there.’
I looked at him and asked if her full name was Jess blah-blah-blah. He said it sounds familiar but he can’t remember. So I described her, and this guy says, yeah that was her. He then says that he remembers that there were two guys fighting over her earlier that night as well.
I told him that I was with her when we were at that party. I got up and walked off.”
20. Wife Talks To Men In An App While I Play Video Games
“I was married for seven years but been with my ex for 11. We were high school sweethearts. We got married because she got pregnant with our first kid. We got married when she was five months pregnant. Pregnancy was rough. Marriage was rough. We ended up living with my parents for a few months before moving to our own little apartment.
The next few years were great.
We made a second kid. Went on bonding nights. Laughed. Loved. We had a strong relationship.
My dad got sick. Really sick. We moved back in to help and he died three months later. Really hit me. With a new baby, and the death of my dad, and a crappy job, all hanging over me, I got pretty depressed. All I did was play video games.
A year goes by.
My wife and I are drifting apart. For whatever reason, I look through her phone one night when she’s in the bathroom and I saw these messages and… pictures… she had been exchanging with other men through an app. I never confronted her about it. I couldn’t. We talked about ‘us’ and decided to get a divorce. She had already been to a lawyer prior to our talk…
there was no saving the marriage.
I miss her every day. She’s happier now, and I feel like I could give her the world with how I am now. It’s been about two and a half years and she doesn’t want to be more than co-parents for our children. She has no remorse for what she did. I told her I forgive her. She won’t admit she did anything wrong but, as she tells me all the time…
It is what it is.”
19. Went To A Family Vacation While She's Professing Her Love To Someone Else
“I ended up landing a girl who was WAAAY out of my league, (my looks maybe 5-6, but apparently my personality is a 15), let’s call her Red, and for the first few months, things were going great. We were both really sweet on one another, enjoyed spending hours of our time together either walking through our picturesque little town hand in hand talking about all manner of things, or going to the movies or lunch out together.
I even won her a cute little stuffed animal from a claw machine (the first time that’s ever happened for me.) Basically the stereotypical picture of young romance.
So the next summer rolls around, and my family decides to invite her and me to Six Flags for a family vacation. She says she’d love to go, but she had some business to take care of, including a party her friend had invited her to weeks earlier.
I was a little disappointed, but otherwise fine with it. I’m generally pretty laid-back and not really the clingy type, plus she had never given me any reason to mistrust her. So the day I’m to head out, she gives me a big kiss and tells me she’s gonna miss me like crazy, but that I should have fun and message her when I can.
We stay in regular contact for most of the 2 weeks I’m gone, except for the last 3-4 or so days, where I was met with radio silence.
I message her via Facebook to ask how the party went. Nothing. Weird, but okay, maybe she’s busy. The next day I message again to ask how she’s been. Again, nothing… Okay. One more time another day later to ask ‘Is everything okay?’. Nothing.
So I finally get home and I still haven’t heard anything from her, so I decide to walk over to her house to see her.
I knock on her door and her brother answers the door and tells me she’s not home. There was something wrong with the way he said it, but I decided not to push it. It’s later in the evening, so as I’m walking away, I glance toward her window and see the light on. Okay, so he lied to me (mind you, he and I were pretty good friends too, so his behavior towards me was a little strange).
What the hell is going on. When I arrive home, I see that she has finally responded to me. To my dismay, it reads:
‘I can’t tell you how sorry I am, but I don’t think we can see each other anymore. I can’t explain more, but know that it’s not your fault. I really did love you, and I’m sorry to do this to you.’
What. The.
HELL. I tried several times to get more out of her, even resorting to begging and promising to not get mad, but more silence.
A few days later, I’m still pretty broken up about the whole thing and seeking counsel from my best friend. He also happened to pretty good friends with Red, so I hoped he had some insight. He proceeded to stonewall me with things like ‘It’s probably better if you just forget it and move on.’ And ‘it’s not my place to say anything’ and eventually ‘It will just hurt you to know the truth.’
I finally coaxed him into telling me and he starts by asking if I knew this guy, let’s call him Dave.
Of course, I knew Dave. Before Red and I even started going out, I knew that Red and Dave were very close, but we all knew it was more like a brother-sister kinda friendship… Apparently not.
I assumed he wasn’t even going to be a factor since she NEVER talked about, or even slightly mentioned him while we were together. And they had never even been seen hanging out since.
But according to my buddy, who was also at the aforementioned party, Red and Dave spent the whole time cuddling on the couch professing their long-time love for each other. After that, they promptly got up, went to the guest bedroom, and proceeded to hump like bunny rabbits the whole night.
Apparently, there were no condoms available, and Dave decided to thoroughly fill her up with seed because the night she broke up with me she found out she was pregnant.
She wasn’t talking to me because of the immense shame she felt.
I never spoke to her again after that, as I was pretty messed up about it. Shortly after all this, she and Dave got married, he joined the Navy, and she moved to Kentucky to be with him. She miscarried at some point, their relationship fell apart, and he spent a few years beating her.
Eventually, she divorced him and moved back to our small townhome to live with her parents. Unaware of our past, a mutual friend invited us both to the most awkward D&D session ever. Afterward, I was out back having a smoke, when she comes out and asks to have one from me (she never smoked previously, so I could tell she was in a bad place.) An awkward silence ensued before she tried talking to me about the whole situation between us.
She half apologized, tried to explain herself, said she should never have done that to me/ left me. She said she didn’t blame me for being mad, but hoped I could forgive her so we could be friends again (myself and several others think she was trying to weasel her way back into my life, as I wasn’t doing too bad for myself).
Being the cynical/ jaded idiot time had turned me into, I laughed at her and told her I was glad for everything that happened to her, before leaving her there sobbing.
Haven’t spoken to her since, but I do feel kinda bad.
Ended up having a lot of trust issues after that, which ended up ruining a lot of future relationships. As of right now, I’m in year 8 of a happy, healthy relationship with the love of my life. She’s helped overcome a lot of my issues, and we recently entered into a 3-way polyamorous love triangle with a gorgeous lady, who’s been a close friend of ours for a few years now. Have no idea what Red is up to these days, and I don’t care.”
18. She Admits To Sleeping With Her Ostensibly Platonic Male Friend
“Junior year of college, two years into what I thought was a serious relationship, we go for a walk around campus and eventually she says, ‘I think I have feelings for (Male Friend, ostensibly platonic).’
I had suspicions about MFOP but told myself that I was probably being a stupid jealous boy, so I tried to shrug it off. I will say that I had taken note that I was rarely invited to hang out with her and her group of 4-5 friends which included MFOP but I always had a way of rationalizing it and brushing off the vibes I thought I might have been picking up.
So as to say, this had been something I had thought was maybe a possibility but that I actively shamed myself for thinking/tried to quash from within for months-to-possibly years at this point (exact timeline is hazy).
So I say, ‘Like, have you kissed?’ I’m still fairly naive but it was worse back then, so this was where my mind goes first.
She pauses. ‘…Yeah.’
I think about the tone in her voice here for a second.
‘Have you slept with him?’
Sad eyes, which had been aimlessly darting around the sidewalk upon which we strolled slowly look up at meet mine with guilt. With a slow nod, my heart sinks. (Looking back, I don’t know why it bothered me more that they hooked up than that she had feelings for him to the point of feeling like she needed to tell me. The feelings are definitely more devastating as the cheat-ee, but something about the hooking up bothered me on what felt like a very instinctual, animalistic level.)
‘Well, what the hell am I supposed to do with that?’ I say, and what follows is genuinely pretty pathetic.
I remember telling friends later that I was really digging for someplace to justify this for her, I wanted to find some grey area where maybe this is just a misunderstanding and she maybe didn’t know exactly what she was doing (I asked her if it had not been clear that our relationship was monogamous — I never said ‘let’s go steady’ but had been seeing each other and spending most nights together for like a year and a half at this point.
she even responded that no, she knew what this was.)
I wanted there to be some fact that could be explained to me that would make it clear/even understandable/forgivable. That space didn’t exist, really. But I was going through a particularly rough time with my mental health — I was extremely emotionally vulnerable and going through a lot of financial/personal problems due to clinical depression/anxiety, was in the process of losing my college scholarships/eventually dropping out.
So being in this volatile and unstable state, I basically tried really hard to make things work with this girl, we end up staying together for like a year AFTER she told me she had been cheating. Don’t really have a great explanation as to why I put myself through that additional year. Obviously, things were not great with the cloud hanging over everything — she was insisting that she was no longer sleeping with MFOP, despite the fact that she was still hanging out with him alone/in the group of friends she would see but not invite me to come with (again, I would rationalize this — it would just be uncomfortable given what has transpired, I’m sure that’s why I’m not invited, no other reason, surely).
She eventually breaks up with me, citing the need to work on herself, a realization she had apparently discussed with her therapist. I was devastated, despite everything, despite that miserable hanging Chad year when I knew I was just fooling myself but felt so unlovable and incapable that I just am stayed because it seemed better than the alternative.
Needless to say, she goes public with MFOP about a week later, they’re living together a few months after that, I find out they never really stopped hooking up and that he wasn’t even the only dude in that group of 4-5 she had been sleeping with.
I hit a low spot for a few months, ended up finding a significant other who treats me with respect and who helped lift me out of the deepest caverns of depression. Now the ex-works at a Starbucks, she and MFOP are broken up and his bald spot has become unavoidable. I’m doing much better. You don’t really shake the noonday demon, but I have a career and a cat and a woman who loves me so things are good.
And, oh, screw you, Mary.”
17. Caught Her Riding An Airplane In Her Room
“The final nail in the coffin was when she said she was going on a week retreat with her dad to Jamaica to chill. I thought nothing of it as her dad works out there now and again.
Annnnnd action I start randomly browsing Instagram and I see her uploading a picture saying bae time to the story thingy….about 8 hours earlier we spoke saying see you in a week blah blah blah, so I confront her she says that she is on the plane back because of some excuse about her grandad being ill.
Alarm bells ringing I decide to ask for a snap of the plane seat (I know some flights you can get WiFi)….she sends me a top google image of a picture outside of a plane window.
I push more and more and say ok I believe you (I didn’t I was on my way to her house), all I wanted was for her to come clean and was giving her all the chances possible but she kept weaving that sweet sweet web of lies.
I park, knock on the door no answer….hmmm maybe I’m overthinking things but then why would she be lying to me so much…
I have a key so I let myself in and that’s when I hear a voice I don’t recognize I’m like oh God, imma be jumped by a robber.
I run upstairs stealthily like the Ninja. I burst into her room to see some random dude butt naked and her ‘on his airplane’ flying high. I 360 the hell out of there calmly say we are done drop her key on the floor as I leave and decided to attempt to fill my pain with sleeping with countless women for the last year (it doesn’t work).
Bonus feature tho, I’ve got some awesome trust issues now so I’ve got that going for me.”
16. He Shouldn't Have Paused The Movie
“Forgot the key to his room in his room. Went to go see him like I always did, and the door was locked. I heard the movie Jennifer’s Body playing towards the middle of the movie. Knocked on the door, said his name, no response. I certainly heard the movie pause tho, cuz he was dumb. Wouldn’t open the door.
I gave up and left the house.
As I got in my car, the significant other of his roommate comes out and tells me that she’d wanna know if the same thing happened to her, that she knew he was home and that she had seen his coworker go up there with him. I drove somewhere, parked, and cried as I tried messaging him.
He tried denying it but then I got the truth.
By the time this happened he had already emotionally abused me enough that I proceeded to stay with him for another 6 months or so and moved in with him into a new place.
And then he cheated on me again lol.
This time it was with another coworker. It went on for 6 weeks.
During that 6 weeks, she went from engaged, to married, to just over a month into that marriage.
To another guy. I ended up finding out from him that my man and his wife were cheating together.
They ended up going out immediately after this all happened, I moved out and was devastated.
Took me about a year to get over that one. Went into a deep depression.
It is now 3 years since that messy relationship ended, happy to say that I’m now in a relationship where I’ve never once had to worry about being cheated on.”
15. This Is Why You Should Never Go Out And Sleep With A Coworker
“My significant other and I were going to the same party. We worked together at the same shop on the same shift, but they got out early and I had to close up. I told my significant other that I’d meet them at the party, so they left an hour earlier than I did. After I got off work and drove over, I found my significant other making out and trying to sleep with ANOTHER person we worked with.
I was like ‘seriously!?? How stupid can you be?’ Not only did my significant other KNOW I was going to be there, but they knew I’d only be an hour behind them. And my significant other decided a fellow COWORKER (and my roommate) would be a discreet choice?
My significant other was so annoyed I caught them like it was some huge elaborate plan they had made to trick me.
It’s like, no… sorry… I have eyes. That’s all it takes. The best part is, they apparently slept with that coworker several times during our relationship, but ultimately ended up with our boss, who is a married sociopath. That’s right, my boss is cheating on their spouse so they can be with my significant other who is cheating on my coworker who was originally helping my significant other cheat on me.
As painful as it was at the time, I laugh off at it now. So glad my significant other found someone as bad as they are. The lessons we learn in youth: never go out with a coworker, and never live with a coworker. Two rules that I’ve followed for the last decade and I’m a happy (albeit slightly bitter) camper.”
14. Karma Hit Her After Two Years
“I went out with a girl in high school for two years, things started going a bit sour and she broke it off with me. She had been hanging around this other guy who she told me not to worry about for a while before we broke it off and they seemed to be getting closer and closer as time went on. Fast forward two months after we broke up and her saying that she wanted to still be friends and we just needed some time apart because she wasn’t sure if we would work out and asking me to do her favors, all this time me naively thinking things would work out.
She asked a mutual friend to help her with an issue with their computer and they found messages between her and this other guy about how they loved each other from before we broke up, I confronted her about it and she denied everything. She then proceeded to spread rumors about me being the bad guy and how I was an asshole and trying to stir off other girls from getting involved with me (small towns suck, by the way)
There is a silver lining.
Two and a half years later the new guy did the same thing to her. I had since moved away to a big city and was trying to be a real adult. She invited me out with a few of her friends and tried to reignite the old flame. Instead, I hooked up with her best friend.
Two wrongs don’t make a right, but it can feel like it sometimes”
13. Girl From Maryland Took Over My Place In The House
“He had been working across the country in Maryland on and off for a year. He would come home to Idaho every couple of months to visit and spend time with me. His Maryland project officially ended at the end of the year and he started the long drive back to Idaho. It was Christmas eve. I had picked his dad up from the airport because we were going to have both our families over for Christmas together for the first time.
I get a friend request from some chick on Facebook. I delete it because I don’t know her. I get a second one. I delete it again. Almost immediately after I delete the second request I get a message. She tells me that now he’s traveling back to me it’s the perfect time for her to let me know he’s been in a full-blown relationship with her the whole year.
But don’t worry as she wants nothing to do with him now she knows what he has done. Most awkward family Christmas dinner ever. A couple of days later I decide to move out of our house because things just went bad to worse. He started to relapse on drugs and get wasted every night. A week after I move out I stop by to pick up one last box in the house. And guess who’s taken over my house already. Yup. Maryland girl who said she wanted nothing to do with him last time we spoke.”
12. We Have No Money But He Offers To Bail His Sidechick
“This happened on Sept. 1 this year and I am still trying to deal with it. My husband had told me earlier in the week a guy had asked him to switch shifts. He is usually off on Wednesday and said a guy wanted to switch, so he would be off on Friday instead. Being that Friday was his birthday, I said yea no problem. The next day he told me they asked him to come in on Friday.
It’s extra hours and we always need the money so I told him to go for it. That Friday morning he got up, took a shower, and left. About 10 am my grandfather’s doctor called and asked if he could come in and do his biopsy. I tried calling my husband to ask him to bring me the car and he didn’t answer, so I decided to walk up to his job and get the car with our spare key.
I got there and his car was nowhere to be found.
I went inside and asked his boss if he was there or if he took a break. They said no, he is off until Monday. So I called him repeatedly and texted him asking what was going on. He finally called and told me he was out driving around. I told him that sounded like a lie but come home because I needed the car.
He got home about 15 minutes later and I told him I needed to use his phone. He gave it to me and I drove off to get my grandfather’s biopsy.
While I was waiting for him to be finished, a message popped up on his Facebook messenger from his friend saying yes he would cover for him. So I looked through his other message and found a conversation between him and a girl named Ashley about how they almost got caught and they would finish later and they loved each other.
I sent her a message to her knowing he would see it telling him to get his things and get out.
I returned home from the doctor and he was gone. He stayed gone 2 days and came home saying he wanted to work things out. A few days later I found messages from his friend telling him the girl went to jail and my husband begging his friend to bail her out and he would pay him back.
We argued some more and he texted her telling her he was staying with his family.
Well, last week I found out Ashley stole $3000 from her cousin’s Gofundme page for his memorial, got a tattoo of my husband’s initials, moved 4 hours to live near us, and is still telling people he filed for divorce and they are engaged. I still think they are talking but have no proof and it’s driving me insane.”
11. She Cheats With Her Boss Four Days After I Scouted For An Engagement Ring
“This is many years ago… I was with a girl (I’m male) for almost 3 years. Was getting pressured to propose.
On a Monday, I get with a good friend and go look at engagement rings. Getting ready to pop the question and buy one.
A little backstory. She worked the 3rd shift, I work the 1st. We have some time together and we are cool, or so I thought.
On Friday, I get a phone call from her lady friend, telling me she is out with her boss. I knew that my significant other had told me was going to lunch with him. They had gone to lunch in the past and it was platonic, nothing more. She tells me this was different, it was their first romantic hangout.
She gets home, I confront her, she doesn’t deny it, tells me I was dragging my feet and she wasn’t going to wait forever for me to propose.
I let her in on the fact that Monday I had gone looking for rings. She cries I throw her out (my apt). She tells me she has nowhere to go. Not my problem, that should have been the topic at lunch. ‘When fblonk finds out I am cheating, he will throw me out and I will need a place to crash’
Years later, I move to a distant state and find she went to stay with the said boss, who threw her out after 3 months.
She hooks up with a friend of mine who immediately cuts off all communication with me. She gets a horrible non-curable disease, (not sexually related) and they move 4 hours from me. They are now married.
As for me, I met a girl in my new state, marry, have a kid, and life is good. I have seen FB pics of the ex and it is sad how bad this disease hit her and diminished her life. I don’t hold a grudge, I actually feel bad for her. I hope she is truly happy. I am sure that last line will get negative reactions, but she had a tough life, and doesn’t deserve what happened to her.”
10. She Met With Him Before I Woke Up On My Birthday
“My wife’s therapist made her tell me in a joint session. I suggested my wife see a therapist after she broke down crying one night and complained about feeling stressed at work, feeling distant from me, wishing her friends lived closer, not knowing what the future would bring, etc. Before that night, I had very little indication that she was unhappy, much less having an affair.
We still did all the normal couple things including seeing friends, going out to dinner, trivia nights, game nights, overnight trips… We always had fun.
During the therapy session, she made it seem like the affair was something that had happened months ago. Little did I know it was still ongoing. We tried an in-house separation to give each other space, but after a month of her acting like everything was fine and dandy, I left.
She still called me and wanted to see me, so I figured there was still hope for us. But after another 6 weeks of vague conversations, I asked her why she didn’t want to seek couple’s therapy to try to work things out. She never had an answer. Eventually, I forced her to say ‘divorce’ and I was left completely heartbroken. She had been my best friend in the whole world for 8 years.
I could never figure out where we went wrong and why she was reluctant to try to salvage our marriage. So I did something I’m not proud of: I hacked her Facebook. And by the hack, I mean I logged in with her saved password. I just wanted to know what she was telling her friends that she wasn’t telling me. Well, it turns out several of her friends (who we hung out with all the time) knew about the affair.
Not only was my ex still seeing the guy, but this had been going on for a year. He was her high school crush who just moved back to the area. The chats she had on Facebook were very explicit. I hacked her Google account to find photos and text messages of their trysts.
My ex took advantage of my long commutes to work to see this guy.
What I thought was a concern when she’d ask me when I’d be home was really her way of keeping tabs on me. She lied about trips (girls’ weekend, stuff like that) just to arrange a time with him. She met up with him before I woke up ON MY BIRTHDAY. Suffice it to say, I went nuts. I can’t describe the amount of betrayal I felt.
Oh, and she still wants to be friends. This happened two years ago, and I got an email from her a few months ago saying her door is always open. I bet it is.
So now I have major trust issues with women. I’ve been seeing women off and on, but it always gets to the point where the woman wants more than I can give her so we end things. I’m usually disappointed, but I get over it. I’m just not ready to open myself up like that to anyone. It took me nearly a year of therapy to become a functional human being again. I’m not risking that kind of vulnerability anytime soon.”
9. I Sensed That She Was Projecting
“Currently happening. Kind of a difficult position because I’m not proud of how I’ve found out, and I don’t know if it warrants a confrontation. I’m a little hurt but more overwhelmed than anything.
I’ve currently been with my significant other for a year. A week after we went official she went to a hockey game with a friend visiting from out of town who had been a high school flame–and she wasn’t entirely honest about who she was going with.
Later she owned up that she should’ve been more upfront. A few weeks ago when she was drunk (we were partying) she started getting in the habit of casually looking through my texts, one time saying she knows I’m cheating. Because I am not, I don’t have anything on my phone.
What I’m not proud of is that when she passed out I got curious and I went through her phone.
My last significant other cheated on me so I know that sort of behavior is usually guilt projecting. Sure enough, I found some stuff.
One was a text with the guy she went to the hockey game with. They had a discussion about if their love when they were young was real, they decided that it was, and they both exchanged ‘I loved you’s. Then they talked about how they kissed at a bar before the hockey game.
Another was with her ex before me. She sent him a picture message of a little love note he wrote her that she had found when cleaning out her car. Said she missed him and they had a conversation.
Curiosity has continued for the past couple of weeks and I’ve checked a few more times. She always deletes the texts. She’ll message the hockey guy now and then, specifically when she’s drunk and/or unhappy.
I’m confused about what to do. I feel hurt, but I don’t know if this warrants confrontation? At least with my last significant other, she cheated sexually so it was easier to fight about. This is like emotional cheating–or is it even cheating? Am I overreacting?”
8. Lying Ex Cut Off My Electricity
“She was angry at me over something unrelated (it’s been so long now, I don’t remember what it was). We were long distance at this time (she had moved back to her hometown to spend time with her family that her ex had kept her from), she decides to go out with some dude from her job and get wasted (dude she would constantly tell me is a womanizing jerk with a wife and kid at home).
She confessed, but initially, it was we just got wasted and he took me home’. We fought about it alot, and every time it came up, more got added to the story. At first, it was that they kissed. Then they made out. She blew him, but not to completion, then she blew him, then she slept with him. And she kept sleeping with him.
Add on to the fact that she was living with her ex’s grandmother and her ex moved in.
Fairly certain she was sleeping with him too but never got confirmation. I moved her into her own apartment and paid the rent. She moved her ex in.
I went out with this woman for 4.5 years. At that time, she admitted to being naked with another co-worker who had no teeth (wouldn’t admit to banging him, but really?), she hung out all night with some dude she was working with and got really high, no one could find her and I ended up leaving work to look for her, at which point she turned the ungrateful girl level to over 9000: ‘I was just out with a friend, what’s the big deal?’ This was at 0130, she was off work at 2200 and usually home by 2230.
My roommates thought she got snatched. She then accused a friend of mine whom I’ve known for over a decade of trying to take advantage of her, ruining that relationship. And I stayed with her. It took 4.5 years of lies and manipulation, and even then I was delusional. We got into an argument, I called her a bad name and she hit me in the face.
She was immediately apologetic, but it was too late. I was a correctional officer at the time, and could not risk her deciding to ruin my life by claiming I hit her, catching a domestic violence charge, losing my job and my certification. I told her she was moving out the next day (I lived on the property at the Prison and I owned the trailer), to call her parents (in North Dakota) and have their friend give her the key to their empty house they were trying to sell.
Power was off at the box and water was turned off at the valve, so I took her over there, dumped her things, turned the power and water back on, and stood my ground.
Being the bleeding heart idiot that I am, I stayed in contact and took her to buy groceries and attempted to stay with her once (against my better judgment) because she was ‘scared to be alone’.
She ended up trying to sleep with me and I stood my ground. That was the last time I saw her (~July 2014).
Met my wife on OKCupid in November of 2014, and my ex found out I was seeing someone because my mother and my sister both still talked to her. I owned my trailer but my power bill was in her name because I didn’t have my life together and had a previous bill with them.
She cut off the power after finding out I was seeing someone (she had since moved to North Dakota to live with her parents). My then significant other, now wife loaned me the money to turn my power back on (sister allowed me to turn on it her name) and I ended up only being without power for about 24 hours. Have not spoken to the ex since. My wife and I were married in April 2015 and I have literally never been happier.”
7. Mom Turns Into A Different Person When Inebriated
“Not my significant other, but I had the unpleasant experience of having to watch my father find out. It all started with my mom coming from work drunk on Mother’s day, saying she wanted a divorce. They get into a big argument but it somehow gets swept under the carpet. During the summer my dad has to live at his job in a different state. One day, my mom tells me and my brother that she’s going to run some errands and that she’ll be back within the hour.
She does not return that night. I was 15 at the time and already had terrible anxiety so I was panicking horribly. She didn’t return calls or texts. I called my dad and he said he’d try and get ahold of her. He doesn’t. Eventually, she answered a call at midnight – more than 10 hours after she said she’d be home – saying she would return soon.
I woke up the next morning to find she still wasn’t there.
This happened a second time over the summer, although during that event I called her work while trying to figure out where she was, and she called me later totally drunk, accusing me of siding with my father, and straight-up saying ‘screw you’ to me, her 15-year-old son. My dad was actually driving back home that night.
She returned before he got home, but I was made privy to more arguments and more awkward questions.
The day before school started my dad wrestled the phone from her and found conversations between her and a coworker. They got into a very loud argument while my cousins were over.
Now they’re divorced and my mom lives with her man, and she doesn’t remember any of the things she said to me. I absolutely don’t feel comfortable around her or the guy. And she still torments my father for no reason.
Makes me deeply scared of relationships. I don’t know what I would do if I had to experience that.”
6. Her Ex Left Something Inside Of Her
“Being cheated on is a terrible experience. Regardless of how emotionally strong you are … that thing sticks with you. To this day, I still have nightmares about the realization that someone you trust can make the choice to crush you. I trust my wife completely, but I still have irrational fears of losing her, and it’s something I’ve struggled with since this event …
Back in high school, my ex and I were fooling around one evening.
While ’rounding second base’ I felt something strange inside of her. Come to find out, she had been with her ex RIGHT before meeting up with me, hooked up with him, and he had left a condom inside of her. Once we both realized what it was, there was the most awkward silence and sadness in the room. She was mortified (obviously) but decided to come clean.
We had been going out for 8-9 months, and she had been cheating on me with this guy since DAY 1. I asked her to leave, and we didn’t speak for over 2 years. After we’d both moved away and went to college, she asked me to meet up and apologized for everything she had done to me in the past (this event was just the icing on the cake, trust me). As much as I appreciated the honest apology, that moment scarred me emotionally, and I still struggle with it to this day. I’m happily married now, and this is something that I have been open and honest about with my wife. She knows how much I struggle with it and has been super supportive.”
5. I Called The Hotel He Luckily Found That Night
“He was going out of town for an event and was going to meet up with a friend halfway there. He was texting me throughout the day, more so than usual, and his timeline started seeming off. First, he was in one city, then he was texting me that he had made it to another in way too little time. Then his plans started changing rapidly from one thing to another.
It almost felt like one of those quick-change scams but over text. Finally, he said he had decided to get a hotel instead of drive home, and within ten minutes he said he’d found one, checked in, and was settled in going to bed. It was a holiday weekend in a tourist town, and he just happened across a hotel with a room at 8 at night?
I called him and it took forever to answer, and when he did he was just giggling like a maniac.
I could hear him walking out of a building and he refused to speak until I could hear the sound of traffic in the background.
He made even less sense on the phone and could barely string a coherent sentence together.
The next day I called the ‘hotel’ he’d managed to find a random lucky room the night before. It was a romantic 3 room bed and breakfast that you have to book weeks in advance.
The staff took pity on me and confirmed that all rooms had been reservations and all had been occupied by couples. I burst into tears and hung up. They called me back ten minutes later to confirm someone matching his very distinctive appearance had been there with a woman. All that day he was texting me saccharine-sweet messages about how much he missed me and wanted to see me.
I broke up with him that night, citing another cause because I couldn’t stand the idea of confronting him and having him lie to my face as well.
About a week later I broke down and said that I had gotten a text while he was gone from an unknown number saying he’d been with another woman that night (I didn’t want him to retaliate against the hotel staff).
He admitted to it immediately and without question.
I’m so unbelievably grateful to the women I talked to at the hotel. If they had edged around it I might very well have decided to bury my suspicions and stay with him. That little bit of kindness and honesty helped me more than they could possibly know.
If you’re ever put in a position to oust a cheater, do it. I know it can put the messenger in a bad situation, but it can do so so much good.”
4. Our Trustworthy Relationship Got Broken By A Single Text Message
“It was emotional cheating, and it was born out of general toxicity and distrust in our relationship. I don’t harbor a grudge, and we are still friends to this day, but there was a definite realization that we’d reached a point of no return.
We had been completely open with each other, we had no secrets. Over time this turned into zero privacy, and zero space. One day she was in the shower and her phone dinged with a text message.
I announced, ‘You’ve got a text’ and I opened her phone and read it, the way I’d done so many times before, the way she’d read mine so that we could tell the other if it was important or if it could wait. Each of us knew the other’s phone unlock code, we’d never had any sort of issue with the other reading texts, seeing our browser history…
complete openness and trust.
The text was her flirting with another guy. ‘Thinking about your eyes’. It was obvious that she was swept up with him. In that second for the first time in our relationship, I felt that I shouldn’t have been looking at that. It was supposed to be secret. It hurt. It sucked. But what sucked the most was realizing the rules had changed without either of us acknowledging it.
There was this flood of realization after that, for both of us, just how much we resented the other and how trapped we both felt.
That split second of realizing ‘I shouldn’t be reading this, she shouldn’t be keeping this from me, we shouldn’t be doing this’ just threw a wrench in the gears of all of our trust and openness. We didn’t recover for several years, even though we’re friends today. I sincerely hope we use that experience to learn and to not make the same mistakes in our current relationships.”
3. He Suddenly Told Me About Everything
“He told me. It was an emotional cheating situation where they (him and his ex – who cheated on him in a similar way) met up a couple of times to get coffee and then would text and use snap chat so their conversations were hidden. This occurred for about two months. He says he didn’t touch her and that the whole thing ended when she had been sending him underwear pictures.
He replied back with three of his own pictures and then proceeded to block her on snap chat the next day (this whole thing took place about six months ago).
I had no idea. He ended it on his own. No indication that something was going on. He told me because we were discussing marriage seriously and he wants to spend the rest of his life with me and couldn’t make that vow while holding onto this secret.
Honestly, I wish he wouldn’t have told me since it was minor in the grand scheme of things. I want to work through this with him. He did everything right when one cheats. Told me the truth on his own accord. Was extremely remorseful. Said he would do anything to make this work. We are gonna go to individual and couples therapy. Wants to change and figure out what to do if this happens again.
Accepts told blame. Said it was for his own selfish desires and validation. Gave me total access to all accounts and records and whatnot. Doesn’t blame that he was usually drunk when they would communicate, but wants to cut down on drinking.
He’s a lot more open now and in a really weird way, I think this has made us stronger and more communicative. Yeah, it hurts like hell sometimes, but when we were discussing marriage the night he told me, I said I felt like we could handle anything that was thrown at us and I think this situation applies. I know I might be naive but I feel like he’s worth it.”
2. Wife Cheats With Her Ex While I Study And Work Hard
“Married 13 years when I found out and it hit me like a ton of bricks.
I was never a relationship kind of guy – sure I had some relationships, but I never felt close enough to any of them to invest emotionally. Handsome, athletic, wealthy, and highly educated. Enter my wife… beautiful (teen beauty queen), smart, funny, like the same stuff I liked (Grateful Dead, beer), and I was smitten instantly.
I’d never felt it before, and it feels like a punch right in the liver when you realize you’re hopelessly in love.
Fast forward a couple of years and we were married and trying to have kids. Turns out she had a condition called premature ovarian failure – meaning she hit menopause at about 18. Over 8 or so years we tried everything and I spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on treatments, ultimately landing on an adoption waiting list.
All the while, she kept telling me that she felt horrible for her inability to bear children and that she didn’t deserve me. I should move on and have my own children with someone else. I told her that I would never leave her side, and I would give everything I owned to allow her the gift (a woman’s natural born right) of creating a life.
Finally, we get the call from the adoption agency – a birth mother chose us! But as luck would have it… my wife became pregnant through IVF and a donor egg at the same time. The adoption agency said we were ineligible due to the pregnancy, but no matter – 9 months later we welcomed our first child into the world. I felt like I was going to pass out when I met her…
in disbelief that all of the time, money, and pain had ultimately allowed us to realize our singular focus. I had a great job, a nice house outside of NYC, and a new little family.
I was laid off a few months later… but not to worry. I don’t give up easily. After floundering around in the family business for a while, during which time we burned every dime of savings, I mortgaged the house in an attempt to provide my child a sibling.
It worked.. twins were added to the mix. I borrowed a little more and went back to graduate school. That’s when the trouble started. Expenses piling up, 3 kids in diapers, and a husband constantly driving 80 miles back and forth to school while working full time must have gotten to her. I remember driving through town one day and my wife told me she was unhappy – I said I know, but I will push myself as hard as I can to land a great job and restore our fortunes once I’m out of school.
Not too much longer, I promise.
A couple of days before Christmas, we had some friends at the house when the phone rang. The caller ID said it was a guy I played hockey with in an adult league (actually it was registered in his wife’s name). The guy happened to be my wife’s high school ex, a guy not even on my radar as someone whom to be jealous or worry about in the least.
I never had a problem with him, we weren’t buddies or anything – far from it – but I could easily break him in half on many levels and he probably knew it. My wife never used to talk about him, and if anything painted him in a less than complimentary light. So… I look at the caller ID and jokingly announce the call to my wife and friends.
My wife all but ripped the phone from my hands to answer it… seemed odd but whatever, we were drinking and having a good time. Our friends and I chuckled about the guy for a minute and then moved on. She was gone for 30 minutes or so on the phone upstairs, during which time things were winding down in the kitchen and the kids needed to go to bed.
My friends said their goodbyes and were on the way out when my wife came downstairs looking like something was seriously wrong. She said we needed to talk after making sure the kids were settled in bed… I said what is it? Silence. Seriously what is it? Silence… then an aura of guilt started to form. Spidey senses tingling now… WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?
What the hell did she do? She said she had an affair.
She got a babysitter on the Fridays I was away at school, went into the city, and met her high school ex at his office a few times, but it was over – they both realized how wrong it was.
Rage. I drove to his house to beat the living hell out of him. My wife called my dad and told him what was happening… and gave him the address where I was headed.
Luckily the man wasn’t home (he actually got hammered and wrecked his car – unclear whether he was running away from me or just running away from the situation in general). I talked to his wife for a while, apologized for my wife’s actions, told his son not to worry, and that everything would be OK.
I was pulling out of the neighborhood when I spotted my dad’s car.
I went home with him and spent the night with my parents. I got incredibly drunk. The next morning I woke up – almost as if just coming around after being knocked out. Where am I? What happened? Oh yeah… now what? I went home to gather my things and say goodbye. No one does this to me and gets away unscathed. I was going to live with my parents for a little while and figure things out.
Extreme guilt can be like a truth serum. I told her I wanted to know everything. She hooked up him in his office, went down on him a few times, and let him go down on her. But it was over. She abandoned the husband who stood by her and gave everything so that she could have a child, who was killing himself to better their situation, who would do anything for her and their children.
But it was over. Please don’t leave, I love you, she said. I made a mistake but it’s over.
I went down to the basement and cut my wedding band in half with an angle grinder, came back upstairs, and threw the pieces at her.
One of my kids was at the kitchen table as I was leaving with my stuff, and she smiled at me. The rage subsided.
I realized I couldn’t abandon my children and let this weak individual raise them alone. I softened my tone and decided at that moment to just take it. Eat it. For my children.
I lied and told her I only wanted her, no one else. That it was OK, everyone makes mistakes and you have been under tremendous stress given the finances, 3 kids in diapers, and a husband distracted by school and attempting to forge a better life.
Not everyone has my patience or pain tolerance, and she clearly couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I did it for my kids… I’ve been faking it for years. I did what I said I would – great job, nice house, upstanding member of the community. But there’s a strong chance that when my children are grown and out on their own, my wife may wake up one morning alone.
Her beauty faded, along with her dreams of enjoying life with her partner by her side. Publicly disgraced, her children possibly realizing how she jeopardized the well-being of our family. I haven’t decided yet, but I’ll keep that option in my back pocket.
I believe my only true job is to make sure my children grow into happy, successful adults. So far, so good. Once that’s done I can start thinking about what I want.
I don’t hate her anymore, I might even still love her. But the innocence is gone. And good Lord I would love to pay back the pain. I don’t need her in the slightest, and probably wouldn’t miss her, but my children need a mother right now.
I feel for everyone who has had their trust broken, dreams smashed, confidence shaken, masculinity or femininity stripped from them. You are stronger than you think – humans can take a lot of pain and still push forward.”
1. Woke Up My Partner And Her Side Guy With A Ball Batt
“It was the first time I had worked a morning shift, the night before my significant other had told me she wanted the place to herself for a ‘girls night’ knowing I would be going to bed early having to be at work at 7 am. I had the strongest gut feeling within the first hour of my shift that I almost felt like I was gonna throw up so I told my manager that I got sick in the restroom and I needed to clock out and take the rest of the day off.
I immediately drove to her apartment and what do ya know he had spent the night and they are asleep cuddling half-naked in her bed. I decided I was going to leave without letting her know I saw her and just up and leave her without telling her why but I just couldn’t do it.
I got all the way to my truck and put it in reverse before deciding whatever.
So I grabbed a ball bat from behind my seat and headed back up. I smashed the mirror that was attached to her dresser and they both jumped up in shock, I grabbed her hair and screamed what the hell is this! He tried to get up and tell me to calm down but I was so outraged and full of adrenaline I told him to lay his head back on the pillow and take a nap before I beat the hell out of him, he had no choice. She was actually crying and pleading that she could explain so out of pure humor I said come out here and sit on the couch and I looked her in the eye and said ok explain. She just started crying heavier and heavier so I left. Well not before destroying her car but then I left.”
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